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Zanemvula

@sbanesihleking

336
Followers
509
Following
298
Media
21,025
Statuses

Lord Commander⚔

Centurion, South Africa
Joined December 2018
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
1 year
I know a few in Centurion and they always wanna explain why they're uber drivers and it's just temporary. Just take me to the mall Jonathan I don't care that your wife left you!
@khanyisile
yho andifuni shame
1 year
we're starting to have yt uber drivers again. another economic indicator.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
11 months
Nkosi Johnson spec had you chilling under a tree with mahewu from 9 to 4 and they brought you back inside when the sun set
@AshleyMakgatho
The President
11 months
This new HIV doesn’t hit. Phamokate and isandulela ngculazi would relax your hair fam. You’d be ashy and glistening at the same time. That’s when the eye test still held firm.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
1 year
Try being handsome in front of Nthabiseng when the Viano is outside ishaya ama hazard
@Lxnwabo
Lonwabo
1 year
Lol how many times amajita in their 20’s hosted parties where baddies were fetched by some car that parked outside?? 💀💀
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
2 years
Sithelo buying her dream body, one part at a time
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
3 years
Oscar Mbo is the first person who I've seen build so much off of his podcast. He stayed number 1 deep house podcast for years what you're seeing from him today has been years in the making. Lest we forget the formidable DJ Luuh and Ezrah Mlotshwa.👊🏽
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
2 years
@Nathi_Menziwa 😂😂 it's not our fault we had a plumber on speed dial
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
2 months
@SabeloSann_ Too much, the originality in there was just amazing.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
1 year
@_KingShadi The one's I have encountered almost always wanna make it known that they think less of what they're doing and believe it should be done by others who are poor just not them, I just laugh at the irony.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
2 months
@Guruu_Nutrific There's another song he did with the lead singer ye Soul Brothers ubaba uDavid Masondo. That nigga was out of this world when he was high😭😭😭
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
3 years
Someone here on Twitter said private schools and private health are scams because you're paying for something that the government should be adequately providing
@MorolongZA
Octavius Phukubye
3 years
.private school is a complete scam tbqh
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
1 year
@Ndonga__ Hhayi banescefe " yah no boet, things are bad we are all doing what we can to survive" Yeah no shit Johnno!
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
3 years
I honestly don't know of any of God's miracles besides waking up. Ngyavuka ngiphante ngihlanganise okuhlanganayo. I keep my head down and work kwaphela. I also wanna be those lucky ones that have things fall into place easily.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
5 years
And I take a step back and say hhay fuck ngfundile man!😂
@LaChapYeWine
La Chap ye wine 🍷
5 years
Ever listened to yourself when you speak in a professional setting?
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
2 months
Need to get myself involved with this organization.
@ZungulaVuyo
Vuyo Zungula MP 🇿🇦
2 months
ATM Elections Advert 👏🏽👏🏽 #VoteATM
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
5 years
@mo_disa Clean shot
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
4 years
I once tried to break up with a Zulu lady wavele wathi "Ulambile, ngyakubona ulambile" Wangidonsa ngesandla wathenga amabhega eMcdonald's we went on to date for a year 😭
@Sposhkay1
Sposhkay
4 years
Zulu Girl: Mina nje Futhi, Asihlukane Bhuti wabantu. Zulu Gents: Usuyagula futhi wena Sisi, akekho ohlukana no munye la. Yeka ukuphapha. / Other Tribes: If that’s what you want it’s fine. AmaZulu awajole wodwa nenkani yawo bandla.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
4 years
God is good man, God is good.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
2 years
My mother once bought me a three piece from sales house for my birthday and my dad and his drunk friends started calling me uPrincipal. My beefs with that woman are many
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
3 years
@palesego_ Really dope seeing black dad's afford their children such dynamics ❤️
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
2 months
@AsandaBhenya That was being imported pure 😭😭🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
2 years
@uLuyanda_Gama Hhaibo sama black sheep thina sidla uKhisimusi ema flatini
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
1 year
You must be a really annoying person for your partner to not wanna spend time with you sober.
My boyfriend always make me get drunk whenever I'm visiting him, a re he enjoys the drunk version of myself 😩
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
10 months
Real life version of your uncle saying "izongbulala lengane"
@ZANewsFlash
Sihle Mavuso
10 months
NEWS: The family of Prince Mangosuthu #Buthelezi has revealed how his health took a worse turn after the incident where King Misuzulu allegedly banged tables. This was while he was addressing him during a closed-door meeting and repeatedly said “Bloody shit, bloody shit.” . @IOL
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
5 months
What do you mean your "femininity" is unlocked by money?
@hlovo_
Hlovo
5 months
As a broer you’re expected to be a masculine leader, provider and protector because it’s in your nature. Your partner has nothing to do with cultivating those qualities. Now Twitter folks are saying that a woman can only be soft and feminine when they’re treated right. Why
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
2 years
@BennittoLindani You're a hater, I have to admire that😂😂
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
2 months
@Guruu_Nutrific Don't get me started on his collabs with Jabu and Vuyo man that nigga is goated.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
2 years
@k_tshegooo Can't feel nothing for people who put themselves in harms way.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
11 months
If you think Steve Harvey is an advocate for anything other than his pockets I don't know what to say to you.
@Twana_Mashandu
Twana MaMbatha Omuhle🧚🏽‍♀️
11 months
Men hate men that treat women well and that advocate for women to be loved. It irritates them
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
3 years
The Dojo podcast isn't supported enough man. I want every young individual to listen to it and learn from it. The content is really food for thought.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
1 year
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
3 months
There's a general misconception that whites are clean astute business owners.
@BonganiNtuli
Sokhulu
3 months
Interesting conversation with a Uber driver, a white guy set up a car spares shop & after opening another white guy came & told him he must close down willingly or theyll make sure hes out of business within a month. Indeed he was after 3 weeks, suppliers had raised prices 500%
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
2 years
Body clock doing me absolutely dirty, I don't even wake up at 06:00:00 during the week bro 💔
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
3 months
I was telling my friends, Yoco dude is one of the few black businessman worth noting. He solved a problem and pretty soon they're gonna touch a billion in transaction fees. No tender shit just innovation and capital being used accordingly.
@kwets11
member of Hamas
3 months
Where is the innovation? will the blacks with capital ever actually create a real product? Not hop on some tender trend? Or is that too much work?
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
5 years
There is nothing I hate more than medical aid co payments, it makes me feel like I'm paying to think I have medical aid rather than paying for medical aid that works for you when you need it to
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
11 months
I just realized how little I touch physical cash
@WHOIS2NGO
SEATTLE COFFEE JIHADIST
11 months
Yall be checking the authenticity of these new notes?
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
1 year
@Guruu_Nutrific She wouldn't even think twice.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
10 months
@SuperZuluGoku Interesting because it doesn't happen, Standard bank will freeze for a mere R25k if they don't know you like that.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
2 years
Lmfao this is so funny and true
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
3 months
Bidvest would be nothing without the government.
@Vhoyde
Null
3 months
Fortunes are made through doing business with the government. Tenderpreneurship is where it's at 😂
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
4 years
The biggest lesson for me when I started working was the fact that my relationship with my finances will always be guided by my parents relationship with finances until I learn and develop new habits myself.
@ImcocoMash
Financial Bunny
4 years
My request to parents is to help develop a positive relationship between their children and the finance sector.We don’t want adults who grow up being afraid of banks that they end up being exploited because the only tome they deal to the bank is when they are distressed/desperate
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
1 year
My dad died and the woman I was seeing said "it makes her feel some type of way that I don't open up to her or include her in my grief"
@DesNoTutu
The Archbishop
1 year
Haba qala ka "but it makes me feel" Everything else doesn't matter shem Their feelings will supercede all sense, all logic, all reasoning, all known knowledge on the matter paramount will be her feelings in that moment And if u know what good for u U will aquiensce to em 😂
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
4 years
When you look at South Africa's infrastructure you realise that Afrikaners really had a plan for South Africa. We had Formula 1 circuits in the 1930's. It's just us they didn't wanna include.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
1 year
This woman brought up false charges against someone who was a competitor of her friend so they wouldn't get a tender.
@zinzimsiza16
NaMsiza
1 year
I wish this woman (Glynnis Breytenbach) could prosecute this case. She’s my fighter. Yesterday and today she’s asking all the necessary questions. You can tell she’s a seasoned prosecutor. Love her work uGirlo #ThaboBester #DrNandipha #NandiphaMagudumana
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
4 years
Whenever I am in a "mess" I ask myself "what did I do to contribute to this mess"
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
6 months
@MohlaleGCR
///M-Bouy💙❤️🇩🇪
6 months
The more I watch Old Top Gear, the more I realise that those lads had to go😭😭😭
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
3 years
Isex eyokwenza iyngane manje mase ungiklinya uthi zizokhuliswa ubani??
@uDosa_
Sandile
3 years
Gents, do y'all like being choked during izimanga? This is a safe place.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
1 year
White South Africans are a special breed of insufferable.
@thomas_violence
thomas violence
1 year
after a couple of years of working in hospitality you start to develop an almost supernatural sixth sense for if a customer is going to be rude or difficult, going off very slight, almost imperceptible cues, like a south african accent
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
1 year
Agreed. We will also talk about Nomzamo's acting after we stop looking at her titties.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
1 year
This lady will forever be famous in my books. Pure comedy. 🤝🏽
@Khanyisa_MAD
Unfiltered
1 year
Xhosa grandmothers PRIME edition 👵🏽👵🏽 #khanyisaunfiltered
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
2 years
@ManChriz54 You telling me you wouldn't fix anything in your body if you had the money to?
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
5 months
Working class doesn't mind being served by an illegal Zimbabweans. But will complain about digital nomads because they directly affect their own quality of life.
@kwets11
member of Hamas
5 months
The middle class is so funny man, this digital nomad issue has had them using all the same lines as the working class people they called xenophobic for all these years because immigration is now directly affecting them😭😂
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
3 years
Sihlezi sithi ama cherry akhuluma kakhulu kodwa mese kufika ibhega yakho ilunyiwe ufuna kona ukukhulunyelwa icherry
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
1 year
@_KingShadi Exactly can't be fucking around with that much privilege
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
3 months
The biggest corporates are held together by excel sheets and remote teams in India... Niggas are stealing stealing bro.
@Kgosietsile_012
John Lick
3 months
LOL you’d be surprised how many employees steal from their corporate employers and it doesn’t make the news 😂 you’ll only know if you work for the company…I’ve worked for 3 different corporates and niggas stole from all 3 😂😂😂
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
1 year
We were getting really good music when the whole team was on EPWPS stipends
@kay_mahapa
Lesilo Rula
1 year
South Africa was a better country when Ambitiouz had niggas in 360 deals and making them bring skhaftins to the studio
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
4 years
The things I hear about me shock me. Not so much about what is being said but who said it and the intention.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
3 months
@BonganiNtuli once bathi contemporary you must know they're taking you for a ride
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
4 years
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
4 months
Nah once you behave like an adult be self sufficient, taking a misbehaving child out of medical aid is warranted akere you are failing to be a child, be an adult ke and adults pay for their own
@kay_mahapa
Lesilo Rula
4 months
“Oh so you stay out till late while I’m worried about your safety? Let me remove you off the medical aid since you so grown” LMFAOOOOO what Fear Factor parenting style is this?? 😭⚰️
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
5 years
Ngyageza sometimes
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
2 years
That's because majority of black people have not established a way of life that isn't centered around labour and death. Those are the two absolutes. Everything else, investment, education is all a luxury.
@Gert_LeNinja
Tempy Pusha
2 years
Black People invest more in death than in life.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
4 years
Usuke ungeke usawenza lutho ama 2000 mese eshutha emvakwe curtain 😂
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
3 years
I fell into the idea of myself instead of chasing who I wanna be. I started enjoying slow days on the couch, cooking shows and that I am capable of giving and receiving a lot of love.
@__Shezi
Shezi
3 years
How did falling in love and falling into a loving relationship change your life?
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
2 years
I don't think I can explain how happy this song makes me. Sibonge bhuti @Boisanza
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
8 months
Senseless stupid man who lives in "the black pool of genius"
@iamMelsmith
Mel Smith
8 months
Y’all can whine about Black Americans centering themselves in this “colored vs Black” discourse re: Tyla which is HILARIOUS because here? It’s just all semantics. But at the end of the day, she’s trying to cross over into AMERICAN territory. She has to pick her battles.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
3 months
I want illegals to be deported so badly. I want to volunteer even. As a citizen I am fucking tired.
@kwets11
member of Hamas
3 months
If you’re not anti immigration yet and need some motivation, go to JHB CBD and drive through Mayfair, if what you witness there does not make you want mass deportation as a South African then I want you deported too.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
2 months
@Guruu_Nutrific Please do not touch my groove conductor man🔥🔥🔥🔥
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
5 months
😭😭😭😭😭 according to a study by FNB her femininity will be activated for a period of 3 to 5 days since that's how long South African salaries last
@kay_mahapa
Lesilo Rula
5 months
O emetse payday gore o kgone go activater femininity ya girlfriend ya gao 😭🫵🏾
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
6 years
@sihle_kibido @OwaFlopo Smear campaign but alas
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
1 year
That new Sjava is gonna bang so hard!
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
2 years
Lmfao hhayi lomjita wayedansela ipromo manje uphakathi endabeni zama cherry
@Zulu_Goku
HIM
2 years
No such thing as a retired Baddie. You just fell off Ma’am. It’s okay.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
4 years
Man I fought last year I fought for all the things I wanted I fought for my dreams and I am so proud that I had the balls to stand up after being kicked in the teeth so many times.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
3 years
I don't think they are what they say they are.
@saney_maxwell
miss safra
3 years
Zookey aside, why don’t you guys vote EFF??
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
10 months
That's one group of people who've had to endure the most tribalism in South Africa. Those memes are small waters still offensive though, I would presume.
@itsreneilwemol
badgirlrenzzygray.🧚‍♂️
10 months
I truly wonder if Shangaan people find the meme offensive😭😭
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
3 years
This was eloquently laid out by Njabulo Ndebele in his collection of essays "Rediscovery Of The Ordinary" it delved into the systematic subversion of one's vlutite for the other and the implications, ie, living the English way by virtue of Language.
@Zuko_Godlimpi
The Native
3 years
Ngugi observes that “language is a carrier of a people’s values and culture.” Mastery of a language, then, entails mastery of the way in which the speakers of that language view the world, their place in it, the place of the next person and what it means to be human
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
4 months
Write down. I want to live in this apartment and drive this car. Look at what you can do to get there. Whether it's get more skills, change provinces. Once you made a list of things you can do. Make a timeline. I did this when I was 19 got all those things by 22. Put in the work.
@Simply_rantia
Emarantia_N
4 months
I follow quite a number of corporate girlies who are living so soft in their early twenties 😭😭 All I want to know is what do they do or what did they study but they mize when ask😭😭😭 Im literally willing to go to school 😭😭
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
6 months
Kia quoted R16000 for a steering rack, scrap yard R1800 😂😂
@WHOIS2NGO
SEATTLE COFFEE JIHADIST
6 months
Mitsubishi motors quoted me R500 for an oil cap. Got that shit for R100 at a scrap yard 🤣🤣🤣
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
4 years
My mother and this
@MDNnewss
MDN NEWS
4 years
Don't force your kids to love relatives that don't reach out for them.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
3 years
People come here on twitter and become either what is feared, celebrated or respected. Never themselves unfortunately. It is rare that people are here what they are offline.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
10 months
That's why their education does so little for the community cause they think they're better than the society they're supposed to uplift
@Coach_Kamo
Coach Kamo
10 months
"Black intellectuals" don't engage with people outside the academy.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
3 years
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
10 months
Extremely worried about this radio station, on Friday they had Chico Twala talking about corruption in South Africa. CHICO TWALA!!
@CoruscaKhaya
Khaya Sithole
10 months
🤦🏿‍♂️🤦🏿‍♂️🤦🏿‍♂️
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
2 years
Eyy man I am so pro drugs if you can maintain them.
@Ant_089
Mr Dlamini
2 years
Not to sound like an advocate or anything but what’s wrong with taking drugs if you’re not a junkie and they aren’t destroying your life.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
8 months
The love my sons show me may very well be my highest achievement on this little ball called earth. ❤️
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
8 months
@ayxnda_ "HI guys ngilala kwi snooker"
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
4 years
Capturing more happy moments this year ❤️ (don't mind the bird shit)
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
3 years
I wish nothing but the best for this company
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
5 months
People are facing livelihood issues because of access to water and you think this is a personal vendetta? Crazy thought process.
@ShamiSibisi
Shami
5 months
No ways. That oke has a problem with the owners of Zai and it’s Personal 😂 akukwazi
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
5 years
You wash your own sneakers? I rate 3 Bangladesh's under 11 on a dollar a day can spring clean your house every week. Also feed them cocaine to work faster
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
4 months
Being humble and interacting with the masses on the ground 🙏🏾 true celebrity
@Okay_Wasabi
George Mnguni
4 months
Bathong. Celebrity kuphi? Ngise Boulders Mall right now eMidrand as we speak. I’m buying lunch eSausage Saloon. I asked for extra onions.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
2 years
@futhy_ My mom was the mean one, I was 6 I had no business wearing anything that came in 3's let alone from Sales House 😭😭
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
1 year
At some point Cash Flow Ngcobo had some cast members of Generations to sanitize his image after fraud allegations surfaced. South African celebrities are either too poor or complicit in using their image to give credibility to criminals.
@DesNoTutu
The Archbishop
1 year
Nkare batho in the entertainment industry are used to dodgy dealings. Because she is explaining all of this nkare it was just normal to do business le someone in jail Makes me wonder what else she has done or gotten herself into for money 🤔
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
1 month
Middle class wants to pay Zimbabwean helpers R200 a day for spring cleaning their 3 bedroom houses. It works out cheaper to exploit than to gain fully employ.
@hlovo_
Hlovo
1 month
The South African middle-class seem to be the biggest advocates for open borders while a large influx of immigrants affects them the least. Your jobs and communities are the least affected by mass immigration. You work in an office and live in a gated community so it rarely
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
5 years
When I use to sell long term financial products some clients would not know what you're talking about, it becomes your duty to educate them before you take the money from them to replace it with peace of mind. I've did it and slept peacefully
@ImcocoMash
Financial Bunny
5 years
Is selling a Financial Product to a Financially illiterate person ethical? Note I didn’t ask about law.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
3 years
I've literally become that uncle the kids go to for Christmas holidays
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
2 years
Yahlula omalume siyini ke thina
@uLuyanda_Gama
Ezinye Zazo
2 years
Aybo nizoyivusa kodwa imizi nina?
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
5 months
Golf 1, dropped suspension, bbs rims and you're one foot in the door. Add a stable job and good looks and you're gonna have to fight them off of you.
@kwets11
member of Hamas
5 months
The only community with financial fair play is the coloured community, their baddies are dating gents with a honda civic and call center gig.😭
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
4 months
I don't have any conversation with anyone who uses people's taste in music as a metric for anything.
@Uhtesohpiss
S.
4 months
This brother is out here saying people that listen to amapiano are not mature. I hate people who judge others, lapho yena the music he says is Deep House isn’t deep.
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@sbanesihleking
Zanemvula
3 years
@Bibo_George Unfortunately I have to agree, did it first does not mean did it right.
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