Greg with Two G's @plusgreg Twitter profile

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

4 months

You can only get this vanity plate in Nebraska, where the DMV doesn't know better than to deny it:

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

1 month

holy heck he actually did it

Sauna Insider

@NickHannula

1 month

Tim Walz will reduce the national debt by making sure the federal government gets its 11% rebate at Menards

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

4 months

@thebadbucket I guess you're not very familiar with street names then.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

2 years

Before you write off "red states" for getting what they vote for, this signwork that is in every transphobe's replies was created by activists in Lincoln, NE outside of a Charlie Kirk hate rally. We're working here. We promise.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

8 months

@JillianSed @guybranum Good for Bowen, and for Sarah for checking in on him. Awful of his workplace to put him into this situation by allowing and celebrating that creep's presence.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

3 months

@hypergiants_ It's still up. I can't believe it's real, and it's still there.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

4 months

The fact that I used to spend my summers at a place called "Island Oasis" in the middle of this map will never not be funny to me.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

4 years

@Sam2323_43433 Whatever, stupid dispenser doesn’t even have any PEZ in it.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

2 years

@ahjsan @mischiefanimals Side note: Animation is so cool. Just look at these smear frames that sell the impact.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

2 months

@jpbrammer Just caught a Greenland Shark in the comments, this one's been alive for centuries.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

1 year

@mischiefanimals Ruffles lost his most prominent fang a few weeks back, but he's still 18-years ferocious.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

2 years

Before you judge "red" states for not choosing progressives, this is the gerrymandering we're up against. Omaha went blue in 2008, and that was so upsetting that Republicans carved our urban areas into the shape of a Frankenstein throat-goating a meatball sub, diluting our vote.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

5 years

@babyitsmb Someone didn’t read the coaster.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

4 months

Zachary Levi replaced Mel Gibson in the sequel to Chicken Run, and now he is Like This. We need to shut down Aardman Animation until we can assess the damage caused by voicing clay roosters.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

3 months

Shout out to Wine, Beer, and Spirits, who moved into the husks of Toys R Us left behind by vulture capitalists in Lincoln in Omaha and did it with style.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

11 days

@abughazalehkat Can't decide between Danson, Goldblum, and Lynch and hey I guess I'm figuring out I have a TYPE, huh??

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

1 year

I frequently scold myself for setting unreasonable expectations of my interactions with the phrase "normal to want and possible to achieve" thanks to @yellowcardigan .

paul khruangbin (Dan Lehner)

@danlehnermusic

1 year

What's a tweet that's so canonical in your mind you make shorthand reference to it, even if people might not know what you're talking about? (I sometimes just say "uh oh y'all it's gettin' kinda hazy" expecting people to get it)

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

3 months

The back of this truck is equal parts Achewood and @bransonreese . Mystifying.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

1 year

@joffeorama @cheryllynneaton They're so cute! 🥹 I would have watched this movie one time for every snake face.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

1 month

It was baffling. Where was "You and I" by Lady Gaga. We have a COOL NEBRASKA GUY on the literal PRESIDENTIAL TICKET.

Erin Fox

@hipsterkibble

1 month

Since Nebraska inexplicably picked Firework for it's Roll Call vote last night I'm going to move

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

4 months

@CT35_012 It's marked available, but all submissions go to approval by a human to filter out slurs, racist dog whistles, gang affiliations, etc. Except in Maine, apparently, where that was ruled a 1st amendment violation. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ The @ca_dmv_bot2 is a great follow.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

2 years

@corgeousgeorge @SAMGREIS Or he's a horrid little bigot who misses the apartheid days of his emerald mine childhood where he always got to be on the winning side of anyone different from him.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

5 years

@franklinhardy I have searched one thousand fucks high and low, and I could not find one thing within them what could explain this sequence of choices made by anyone except the dog. Dog was just like: hell yeah, digging’s fun dude.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

1 year

@NebraskaMegan I graduated high school with the daughter Sen. Aguilar wants to use to prop up his hate in this impotent little screed. This is the kind of thing she regularly posts. Thoughtful, considered, and thorough recriminations against everything Ray believes on this issue.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

1 month

Interview here:

Rob Flaherty

@Rob_Flaherty

1 month

🚨 @Tim_Walz did Subway Takes 🚨

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

3 months

@crookshuv I see Tim has entered into the "I'm going to tear down the community center" portion of his villain arc. Can't say I'm surprised.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

9 months

@guybranum "Distance between the eyes" kills me. A little baseless phrenology creeping in, as a treat.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

5 years

@caseyjohnston @LouisPeitzman Every road should default to the mistrust Google Maps has in your ability to know what interstate you’re on.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

10 months

Before you callously make a post about all the great things you accomplished this year, please consider your friends in the Huge Pieces of Shit community. We exist.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

2 years

@ChrissySh Her commitment to bad posts makes her very relatable to me, personally.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

2 months

@CantEverDie I can't believe how long the Nazi sonnenrad is on-screen. It's a slow fade! It's like an MCU post-credits cameo.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

2 years

@TheSpeakman @yokaihainen Going to start a NeighborSMR channel of ominous tones to help with conflict resolution for apartment residents.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

6 months

Omaha Mayor Jean Stothert rolling to determine the number of days she'll spend in the city this year:

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

4 years

@jillboard

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

1 year

@bestofdyingtwit Elon paid 44bil for Twitter an now we have to witness this insufferable dystopian co-parenting. Your baby got the name he wanted to give PayPal, Grimes! You're not special!

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

2 years

@sassybibrarian @DiscussingFilm

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

2 months

@jpbrammer OH...?

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

3 years

@cmo3stacks @foe_of_the_show @reghud This icon was from here in Omaha in an October deluge (and it was cold!) but I’m grateful for every worker who took a stand and didn’t back down:

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

6 months

@rules_of_izzy @XNews @bronzeageshawty @samsarashawty This is without question a fireable offense everywhere but Congress.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

3 years

@BFriedmanDC Is your brain soup? Multiple officers tried to slow him down to update him on the reality of the situation. He charged ahead with a high-powered weapon unsuitable for a building with additional rooms. I revise my earlier question: What kind of soup is your brain?

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

2 years

@bunnypirata @Z_E_T_E @JoshuaYehl The term “user,” like it’s a class weapon. 😂🤣

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

3 years

@drozphallic Not Wordle, just the Lord of the Flies paperback distributed by your English Teacher. ⬛️⬛️⬛️⬛️⬛️ 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟨🟩🟨🟩 🟨🟩🟨🟩🟨 🟩🧿🟩🧿🟩 ⬛️🟨👃🟨⬛️ ⬛️🟨👄🟨🪰 ⬛️⬛️🟨🪰🪰

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

3 years

@DeirdreJernigan @sievish Good GOD. Imagine finding someone who shares a fairly niche hobby and passion and pushing them away THIS HARD. Truly baffling stuff.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

7 months

@vinn_ayy 🎶🎵🎶🎵🎶🎵 What would you do if your pup was at home, crying on the all alone in the waves and foam, cause he's hungryyyy, and the only way to feed him is to chew up a shark for a little bit of chummy 🎶🎵🎶🎵🎶🎵

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

4 years

@bjorksdaddy @ghaknar Ok, but who is SHE? Hubba hubba!

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

2 years

@baselinevibez @RacieBeep IT’S SOLOSIS!

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

1 year

It's a ferret in a hoodie. Mom would name it Acorn, assimilation complete.

Hard Drive

@HardDriveMag

1 year

Every Starter Pokémon Ranked by How Easily I Could Convince My Mom They’re a Real Creature

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

2 months

@janetherevelatr @jpbrammer This guy's calipers are made out of ivory.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

9 months

Inventing a coffin with a big hole in the side so you can stick your leg out if it gets too hot in there.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

4 months

@OrigamiBrando Can't believe this didn't get denied. Seems like an easy case for @ca_dmv_bot2 . "Driver said their car is very Prius-y, status: Denied"

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

1 year

@jondelarroz How's your DV case going, Jon? They let you in cons still?

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

2 years

@rosemarieho_ I don't know who at Google is responsible for this, but it's still real:

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

4 months

This clown had his racist dad buy him a governorship and then a senate seat and he has the bright idea to SHARE his gerrymandered-to-hell district. It's a bunch of farmland grouped with city suburbs to dilute the urban vote. It looks like Frankenstein deep-throating a burger.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

1 month

Hey folks, please read this speech that was not platformed at the DNC (despite being vetted) and please contact your reps to stop the massacre in Gaza. #CeasefireNow

SRPasses it on

@SallyRCbra

1 month

A friend has sent me this, the speech by Palestinian rep that should have been at #DNC . It’s lovely and careful, respectful and doesn’t even ask US to stop sending arms (which they should). I can’t understand why it wasn’t allowed.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

4 years

Remember the time @erikaishii demonstrated how Nintendo of America makes Kirby cover art?

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

8 months

@ParisPhl They have PLATES, that's a TAVERN. A dive bar's presentation should never rise above plastic baskets with waxed paper.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

7 years

@paul_haine Check out the chow chow lol:

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

9 years

Everything #CamNewton is scrutinized, because racism, but it takes only a shred of empathy to see he's heartbroken:

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

1 year

@HeartlandSignal Senator Marshall please let us see ur venmo history

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

3 years

@FilbiPott @mairE_keyL @JenKatWrites Vicki Vale here for Gotham News 7, unbelievable scenes here at the Gotham Zoo Aviary, where the Penguin, Robin, and the full Court of Owls have all been mercilessly dispatched by a new menace who calls himself The Birderer.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

1 year

@JUNlPER The poll is definitely only registering paid users. Under a million votes have been recognized, compared to the last poll he decided to completely ignore.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

6 days

I just said the words "just two breakfast Runzas, please" in a drive thru and it WASN'T in a recurring dream/nightmare. Dreams literally coming true today, folks.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

3 years

@HitFactoryPod @collision88 @bethbourdon @PageSix Still can’t believe this image is real. Incredible.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

1 year

@BirdRespecter "Biljana Electronica" is Czech for "milkshake duck."

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

9 months

@mixedgrass666 The best part is that evolution did this TWICE. It said "damn, those guys were cool, shame about that asteroid."

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

9 months

CW: suicide attempt It's been just under 11 years since I approached this edge. In the bath, a friend coming in a few hours who would find me. I heard a soft jingle. My dog was sitting nearby and shivering in the cold bathroom. I stayed here for Ruffles. We should all stay.

Aurély 🌻

@LabGrownFemcel

9 months

I don't know if it counts as a piece of art but the TikTok "apology to my cat" makes my heart pinch every time

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

4 years

@socialistdogmom

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

7 years

My Myers-Briggs personality is ECRJ: Emotion by Carly Rae Jepsen

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

2 years

@_Kirashura @ahjsan @mischiefanimals …Yeah? I’m calling them out because they’re cool as hell. It’s incredible work. Sorry if that’s somehow not clear. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

5 years

@elizaskinner This will never exist. Only influencers would want to go, and there’s nowhere for them to keep their phones.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

2 years

Not OPEN, not NOPE, but a secret, third, midwestern thing.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

2 years

@gbosabiaspin @punished_cait This song made me furrow my crotch.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

9 months

After I storm out of pub quiz because I am opposed to the existence of 10-20% of people, I like to take in the holiday lights of downtown Omaha.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

2 years

@ziibiing @WentRogue Based stuff happening all the way back in the early aughts:

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

5 years

@everydaylouie

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

3 months

@bromojumbo RETVRN

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

7 years

So, I posted this to the @CIPYDPodcast FB group and someone wrote fanfic of their dog saving my dogs' pretend marriage.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

3 years

@McClellandShane And lo, the archangel Portland Airport Carpet 1993-2013 appeared among them and said…

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

1 year

"Don't tell me you don't understand pronouns, when you got a big curvy truck with nuts that you call she and her. 'HoW cAn OnE tHiNg Be A tHeY?' Look at your truck, dude. You white trashed yourself into being progressive." - @kylekinane 's new special rips:

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

1 year

They're called Frings, you festering inbred meat royalists.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

2 years

While a chemical fire raged in the heart of his district, putting over a hundred densely populated blocks into recommended evacuation, @RepDonBacon said nothing. The challenger for his seat worked to keep info flowing and shared vetted sources on the crisis. Easy choice here.

Senator Tony Vargas

@TonyVargas

2 years

This is the evacuation zone. Please be advised.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

4 months

please go to Gaza Funds and donate or share, they feature a fundraiser in need of support and attention for Palestinians in crisis: or donate to PCRF, they do incredible work:

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

1 month

@ditzkoff @Maukingbird

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

2 years

@xoxogossipgita Marco has changed the name of the group chat to "Yeerf" TOBIAS: u kno what I meant, im using a BEAK

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

3 years

@PastorSelinaC @JustinMcElroy @MBMBaM Is Crustacean Theater currently playing the hit new musical “Shrimp! Heaven! Now!”?

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

9 months

Hardly an empty seat at @Yo_Muchacho Omaha for their special New Year's Eve brunch. Good to see people supporting a good business, can't WAIT to taste that briskets and gravy.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

4 years

@MaxEMcMorrow Janelle Monae grits up great.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

7 months

@theryangordon @TVsCarlKinsella My theory is that they pushed this computing power to their AI DJ, which sucks shit.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

2 years

@mondomascots [soaring saxophone intro]

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

2 months

@oncloud_e @CantEverDie I'm sorry to expose this to anyone who hasn't been cursed by seeing it before, but it's important folks know just how awful this man looks.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

1 year

@BirdRespecter These are the windows Dilbert guy is staying away from.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

6 years

@NifMuhammad @YouWillwill I like Fill Me In by Craig David, where a young woman who just wants to get it must match wits with her father and his uncanny Mind Palace of observations about wine bottles, taxi money, and jacuzzi status.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

5 months

Y'all made fun of my dad's house so much that he died, I hope you're happy now.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

7 years

my dog Ruffles is a weird sack of nerves and twigs, for every rt this gets i will ask him what his whole deal even is

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

10 months

@ArieRiswandy @yourbuddyash You must be the chosen one. You speak Dieseltongue.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

5 years

I bet the majority of tennis balls are used by dogs at this point. Tennis players should have to call them dog balls.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

2 years

@AliceRHamilton ACAB includes Judy Hopps.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

9 months

If you hosted trivia for this group of ghouls, please DM me. As a fellow trivia host, I'd love to venmo you enough for a six pack or some other treat.

Jane 🕸

@janetherevelatr

9 months

When you think you've got something but you definitely don't

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

4 years

I think @fwong ’s idea would work, but we need to raise the stakes. The state with the lowest cases per capita gets PERMANENT MCRIBS at all their McDonalds. The states in the bottom five never see the McRib AGAIN.

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Greg with Two G's

@plusgreg

7 years

@totinos This is the first promoted tweet I've ever enjoyed. Kudos, @katiesisneros .

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