Paul Haine @paul_haine Twitter profile

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Paul Haine

8 years

Lately it feels like a parent caught us reading some news & now won’t let us out of a locked room until we’ve smoked a whole packet of news.

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Last Seen Profiles

@coco_nyan33

@AyameKlaudia

@you_wren

@l_Moose_l

@Amineht5

@dawseyology

@bokeplokalmalam

@Sangresudoryft1

@_syderella_

@cuckoldkocadayi

@Seq921

@chassyxig

@babyscumbag

@CCFCheetah

@ChemBark

@NoFlutter

@JonSnow_Jr

@HangleyJr

@bokeplokalmalam

@family_watch

@psg7514

@Cncmeng_CN

@LyrdaRwh

@SuperToad58384

@ymecanse

@JonathanChiwara

@FreedomCaucusGA

@MichelTakuma

@AlbertCabassa

@devontennyson

@NazurinMouse

@16yShinoN

@feresabulfadl

@sedi_8

@maidenengland66

@Vnilla__

Paul Haine

@paul_haine

7 years

This Pikachu dancer's costume started to deflate and it looked like the dancer was urgently bundled off by government security agents.

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

7 years

Fascinated at how crossing a Corgi with any other dog breed results in what is basically a Corgi in disguise as the other breed.

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

7 years

Kittens raised near rabbits learn to jump like rabbits

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

7 years

Bisexual women on the rise. Bisexual women getting closer. Bisexual women have you surrounded. Bisexual women are inside the barricades. Bis

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

7 years

Missed my train because I had to stop for ten minutes to talk to this dog

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

5 years

In retrospect I think it’s time to question Billy Joel’s claim that his generation didn’t start the fire

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

2 years

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

6 months

One of my favourite types of video is "Americans underestimating British condiments"

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

7 years

If you're ever having a bad day, just watch this video of a man trying to deep-fry gnocchi

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

8 months

Urgently need a full televised documentary series from this TikTok pub reviewer

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

4 years

Every episode of The Mandalorian

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

6 years

Hannibal Lecter telling bad jokes is entirely what I’m in the mood for right now

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

8 years

I’ve a lot of respect for Mark Hamill’s 30 year attachment to this jumper.

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

6 months

British people when we see how much mustard she added to the sandwich

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

9 months

trevy

@chillextremist

9 months

The age of little treats is over. The time of the big treat has come

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

5 years

One of my favourite things about Twitter is when the inventor of Godwin’s Law turns up in conversations with a gentle “you know nothing of my work” slap-down

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

6 years

Lots of good advice here

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

2 years

When someone explains how Mastodon works

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

7 years

Scanners (1981)

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

6 years

I want to see this detective series

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

8 months

@hansmollman I used to have this issue with Chris Pine, who used to look like someone who would definitely have bullied me at school, but thankfully he's aged into a sort of 1980s werewolf persona and I'm on board with him now

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

3 years

Why does only football get to be called ‘the beautiful game’ when you get drama like this in bowls

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

1 year

@Potatopolitics Hugh Jackman marketed to men vs. Hugh Jackman marketed to women

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

7 months

@feralspamlet @thymeIord This?

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

7 years

This is the best Slave Leia cosplay I’ve ever seen, or ever will see.

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

8 years

I have no context for this photo of Lucy Liu throwing a javelin in a dress and high heels but perhaps no context is needed.

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

7 years

Whenever I read about Theresa May vs the EU, and their respective levels of competence and clout, I think of this Fry & Laurie sketch

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

6 years

Rare photo of a hippo standing on a piece of Lego

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

6 years

If you’re ever despairing over those “30 under 30” lists, just remember that Frodo didn’t embark on his journey to cast The One Ring into the fires of Mount Doom until he was 50

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

7 years

They look like someone who owned a Corgi downloaded the “Extra Dog Breeds” DLC but found it was just cheap palette swaps.

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

5 years

@chilledarctic @EwaSR @SpiderManMovie

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

6 years

The cast of The Good Place were filmed by Kristen Bell as they found out how the first season was going to end

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

4 years

@catcontentonly @22centuryblues

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

2 years

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

5 years

Stephen Canning

@EssexCanning

5 years

If the General Election was a song, what song would it be?

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

6 years

Every photo of Wes Anderson looks like he’s going to be a serial killer in 3-4 episodes of HANNIBAL before Mads Mikkelsen offs him for making disparaging remarks about the wine pairing

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

7 years

Star Wars: The Last Jedi (2017)

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

3 years

@AjShehata I say take the sign down but add a paint job to the roof

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

7 years

Endlessly fascinated by this clip of Boris Karloff fake horse-riding during the filming of BLACK SABBATH

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

7 years

The French right now

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

4 years

Once the pandemic is over I’m going to put on a blue Apple Genius shirt and lanyard and run up to Naomi Wolf in a restaurant screaming WHAT YEAR IS IT? at her

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

6 years

Gut feeling is we’ll be re-using 1935’s

Rhys 📼

@FlemishDog

6 years

In 2019, you can re-use calendars from these years: 2013, 2002, 1991, 1985, 1974, 1963, 1957, 1946, 1935, and 1929.

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

5 months

@jailedamanda Called it 'Endgame", killed off two of the main stars, retired a third and then ended the movie with the whole cast literally signing off

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

7 years

Me considering the moral implications of ordering a takeaway during a snowstorm

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

8 years

That feeling when you dress up just to impress Patrick Stewart but then he doesn't even notice you

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

5 years

scientist: oh hey u guys are back early excavator: earth’s haunted scientist: what? excavator: *loading a pistol and getting back in the digger* earth’s haunted

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

3 years

Me trying to leave this world after discovering there’s a whole generation that thinks Joss Whedon invented “comic banter” in screenwriting

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

6 years

These vintage matchbox designs are weirdly relatable

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

4 years

Swear to god if the UK goes into quarantine and English people start sticking their heads out of their windows to sing Tubthumping with their neighbours I’m going to lose my mind

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

4 years

Doing a bit of food shopping

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

5 years

Sitting in a cinema with my phone using the “this seat is reserved for ten minutes” feature of online booking to block out all the seats around me

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

2 years

@BrndnStrssng I don't know how he ever worked again after doing this

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

6 years

My parents are visiting so we’re watching a film in the wrong aspect ratio so they’ll feel at home

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

4 years

@MonsieurMarlowe @CinemaVsDave

the federalist stinks!!!!

@rajandelman

5 years

Muppets riding bikes

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

8 years

I’m so angry these mock ‘90s Lucasarts games by Andrew Scaife don’t exist

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

3 years

@CasparSalmon They’re all trying to chase that high

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

3 years

@NINETIREDBUGS @JRobb773

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

4 years

@EwaSR I don’t know of one but you reminded me of one of my favourites

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

4 years

@merrilymaralie If anybody gets too close to me I gruffly say "Move along, stranger". Not because of coronavirus though, I've always done that

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

5 years

Delighted by this episode of Star Trek TNG where the away team is trapped in an alien hotel but it just looks like they don’t know how to use revolving doors

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

4 years

That’s a pretty low bar though

CBS News

@CBSNews

4 years

Biden responds to speculation that he's facing a cognitive decline: "I can hardly wait to compare my cognitive capability to the cognitive capability of the man I am running against"

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

7 years

This cat looks like it’s refusing to let a space-virus-infected cat back into the airlock, because of safety protocols.

Georgia Sanders

@UpAndGeorgia

7 years

My friend's neigbour's cat. He's always watching. Always waiting.

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

5 years

The only thing that stops a bad guy with a gun is a *checks notes* Glaswegian

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@madferit1888

5 years

Guy outside Nicos with a gun last night! Bouncers done well 👍

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

11 months

@maybeitspierre If you're still sat in them past your allotted time they just snap shut on you

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

2 years

@Manda_like_wine Ah yes, the sitting method

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

4 months

I think what happens is she gets jealous of JK Rowling taking all the attention so she has to come up with something like "I know of a child who identifies as pasta" to bring the focus back on herself

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

6 months

@weakasskath When they're asked why in their middle age they've not purchased a house

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

6 years

Christmas morning on Twitter

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

1 year

@EPM106 I don't know nothing about no widerlore Mr Frodo but I'll wager nothing good'll come of it

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

7 years

I love pixel art

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

7 years

Love to learn new skills

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

7 years

Found the subject for my next series of children’s books

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

2 years

@taylorgarron They’re actually polenta

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

3 years

@YuckyTom Actually English Bulldogs only skateboard when they're VERY distressed

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

1 year

We finally caught up to her

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

1 year

Me going to see Barbie and Oppenheimer on the same day

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

4 years

@cal_gif Probably stealing it

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

6 months

@polluxa She just means hot. It's more like wasabi heat than chilli heat

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

7 years

If the day to day horror of existence is getting you down, try watching this dog getting washed. Take as long as you need before moving on.

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

4 years

@BeingAndyChen @hels Actually you can ask for Vitamin D in most restaurants and they’ll bring it out in a big block they grate over your meal

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

6 years

Guardian headline writer just absolutely not in the mood for this today

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

5 years

@isabelzawtun Clearly the solution here is that everyone else dresses in Spider-Man-themed outfits as well

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

1 year

@Brieyonce

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

7 years

Remembering that video of that guy getting that owl out of that window

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

5 years

@Scientits @EwaSR But the listeria is where all the flavour is!

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

3 years

Probably my favourite extra in the whole of SPARTACUS, really just giving his all

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

3 years

I enjoyed the Suicide Squad trailer but I’m also old enough to remember the last time we all enjoyed a Suicide Squad trailer and how that turned out, so.

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

5 years

Found this instruction manual for people new to Twitter

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

3 years

@IanDunt Can’t decide if “He grabbed her arse in a government department” is more of a Pulp song lyric or an Arctic Monkeys song lyric

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

5 years

My favourite way to discover new Netflix shows is to hear about them for the first time from a passionate fanbase annoyed that Netflix has cancelled the show

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Paul Haine

@paul_haine

2 years