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Jonny

@mancmaestro

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Following
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Manc. Blue. Gamer. Music-er. Part time adult. Purveyor of fine rums and even finer opinions. Followed by Chesney Hawkes. 😎🤘🏻

Manchester
Joined August 2011
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
@mancmaestro
Jonny
1 year
It's the Manchester glow, mate. The moisture from the rain does wonders for the skin. You move to Barcelona or somewhere hot ..she'll have skin like tanned leather in a week pal. You wouldn't want that.. would you? Think about it Bernie, you know it makes sense staying put 😉
@BernardoCSilva
Bernardo Silva
1 year
THE MOST BEAUTIFUL BRIDE EVER! 🤍
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 years
@sportbible *puts tin hat on* Pep. The amount of people who throw shade and call him a chequebook manager is unreal. The man came to England and literally tore up the book on how to play football. He's influenced an entire generation.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
3 years
There'd one missing from this @aguerosergiokun .. Big shiny one, massive handles. Bring it home next week 💙 #UCLfinal
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
5 months
@MailSport You know what's ridiculous here.. the article even mentions how few games he played for city in comparison to both Madrid and Milan.. yet to push the agenda and sell more, it's "former city ace" 🤔
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
1 year
Scousers complaining @ the "always the victims" chant yesterday. A fanbase that cry foul @ every opportunity, yet wave Steaua flags.. smash up coaches & support racists with t-shirts Ironically, their claim it mocks Hillsborough (it's NOTHING to do with it) is the entire point
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
4 years
This is a fucking disgrace @MetroUK . Jerome left in 2011 & made his name at #Bayern . Hasnt been linked with us in 10 years.. but at the first opportunity, you make a tenuous link to #MCFC instead of focusing on a poor girl whos tragically died. Gutter journalism. #BuyaCoffee
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 months
@Cityforever03 I replied to a comment earlier saying precisely this. I don't see why the below wouldn't work 🤷🏻‍♂️
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
11 months
Trust city to fuck Dryer's applause by conceding. 😂🤦🏻‍♂️ Still, sure he'd have seen the funny side. Here's to you my mate 🩵
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
3 years
@ladbible A number of the marvel characters - RDJ as Iron Man Ryan Reynolds as Deadpool Hugh Jackman as Wolverine Patrick Stewart as Charles Xavier then.. Christopher Lloyd as Doc Brown Bruce Willis as John McClane Harrison Ford as Indiana Jones Forest Whitaker as Idi Amin
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
3 years
Five minutes before kick off. This isn't good enough @ManCity - no wonder we've got empty seats. Can't get in the ground 🤦🏻
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
5 months
Seeing this new 'influencer' posting city vids on my TL now, & the various comments attached. Frustrating situation. IMHO she's undermining the validity of 🇺🇸/foreign fans - *many* of which are lovely people with much to contribute. 🧵...
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
4 years
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
3 years
@ladbible Original source mango shower gel. Your brain works different when you're off your face 😂 "this smells well nice, wonder if it tastes as good?" No. No it doesn't.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
1 year
Sleep well, Dryer. You can rest now mate 😔💔 x
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
5 months
Wondering if City need to start a verification system for robots/away fans when buying tickets? Instead of clicking which squares have a boat in - I want a line up of ex players. If you can’t identify Gerard Weikens, Steve Lomas, Jim Whitley or Paul Walsh you can’t buy shit 😂
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
1 year
This is a lovely gesture, but the irony isn't lost on me & Dryer would be absolutely pissing himself laughing. Not a chance Dryer would be anywhere other than the concourse having a pint already by the 45th minute.. 😂 If you're at the game & do the same.. raise your glass 🩵
@LucyCooke2
Lucy Cooke
1 year
Calling all Man City fans! In memory of my lovely friend and devoted blue Chris Drysdale #Dryer we are asking if everyone can clap in the 45th minute on Tuesday’s game against Crvena zvezda. Please can everyone share this far and wide.. dryer would absolutely love this 🩵
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
4 years
@IsiahPaskins @ManCity @premierleague @marathonbet Not quite sure you understand how this fixture malarkey works mate 😅 We play every team twice.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
4 years
#Messi has been royally shafted AGAIN by the powers that be @ Barca with that contract leak.. Whether it's City (I hope it is), PSG or even Grampus 8 - he needs out. If he doesn't, damage to the relationship between #FCBarcelona & their greatest EVER player will be irreparable
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
9 months
@slbsn Nail. Head. Doku/Gvardiol aside, our summer business this year was akin to the year we signed Sinclair, Garcia and Rodwell after winning the league
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 months
@camageddon_ You know what's sad about this.. on top of the victims, there were 6 other band members who had their lives and careers ruined as collateral damage from Watkins actions. As a kid, these were easy one of my fav. bands & a big part of my playlists. Can't listen to em now 😔
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 years
@LUHGBen @XWizardClint @sportbible Correct, although not just United fans. In part it's a byproduct of it being fashionable to hate city. Hes the 'chequebook manager' that every team in world football would move mountains to hire.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
8 months
@nath_mcfc03 Would love to know her opinion on Sadio Mane now, she got binned off for a child 😅👀
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
4 years
Absolute belter of a comment there from @MicahRichards addressing the scouse love-in from @SkySports when asked his thoughts on City v Liverpool next week. "Oh, am I invited to that one?" 🤣🤣🤣🤣 Don't mince your words lad!!!
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
3 years
@BeersnBlues Casually puffing on a Cuban. My fucking hero.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 years
@paddioche @foofighters Proceeds going to UK charities picked by Taylor's wife and kids pal. But go off 👍🏻
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
1 year
Been waiting for this one 😂😂😂 #MCFC
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
3 months
@HLTCO This isn't meant as a slight; but it shouldn't be a shock. French kids are taught English from an early age - so most are fluent by their teens. We are the embarrassment in Europe. We don't learn languages until high school & it's not pushed with the importance it deserves.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 years
All the way to Paris.. Unless you missed the bus.. Jibbing with no tickets Then teargassed by the fuzz.. Karim given offside.. But then vinicius stepped up Quadruple is in tatters You fucking shithouse cunts.. Allez allez allez #LFC #ChampionsLeague
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
3 years
Genuine question.. I'd like @WestHam to get top 4 (think most City fans would), think their fans deserve it.. but if that happens, does that mean the fans nolonger want Gold, Sullivan and Brady gone - given it will have happened under their stewardship? #WHU @WestHam_Central
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 years
@KettyBitch Absolutely the worst day of the week. At least with Monday, you go into it with the optimism that it’s a new week and it’ll be better than the last one. By Tuesday morning, you’ve realised it’s even shitter and you’re fucking nowhere near Friday 😂
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
5 months
City aren't the club they used to be, we've grown to attract a worldwide following & most of us are aware of that. Equally, most blues don't care where you're from - so long as you respect the history of the club & those who've been here for a long time already
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
1 year
Am I the only one who isn't upset by the @ManCity season ticket price increase? Mines £930 (inc. Platinum) & has gone up about £40.. so just over £2 a game. I get cost of living & all that, but going to the match is a luxury (& what a luxury it is) Absolute bargain in my eyes
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
1 year
As many will know, a much loved blue, Chris 'Dryer' Drysdale, lost his life this week. He leaves behind a wife & kids, so a gofundme has been set up to help - both with funeral expenses & hopefully the future too 🙏🏻 Please give what you can 🩵 #MCFC
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
6 months
Not tempting fate re the result.. but God am I basking in this meltdown right now. Growing up in Salford as the odd blue out, and an absolute lifetime of shit - I never thought I'd see the day. And you know what? It's fucking magnificent 😂😂😂😂 #MCFC
@natashaturk
natashaturk
6 months
Speaking for every one of us @United_Webby
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 years
@Barcajim3 Boarded up windows and missing letters on the pubs signage 😂 Oh, and hearing there had been gangland executions in the pub. Still, went in for one - be rude not to haha. #Salford #FlemishWeaver
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 years
@IanCheeseman My season ticket has gone up £25. That's £1.32 a game. With the level of football on display (& in comparison to prices elsewhere) that's an absolute BARGAIN. Yes times are hard.. I get that. But football is a luxury, not a necessity. If I couldn't afford it I wouldn't go.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
1 year
@antmarkmcr @City_Xtra @berger_pj @kerry_hau Nah. The man gave us a champions league. The club knew his terms, we didn't meet him. Owes us nothing. A farewell would have been wonderful, but don't be bitter. Just be grateful we had him 7 years.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
10 months
Paaaaaaass to Doku pon' de left hand side Paaaaaaass to Doku pon' de left hand side (And he will run) Give him the ball and he will run run run (He will run) He'll cut inside and skin defenders just for fun 🤌🏻
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
1 year
Champions. Again. 🍻 Cc: @Felix6ood , @ManCity
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
4 years
@blink182italia @markhoppus This.. I've seen blink 3 times and not sure I've ever heard this live. Fucking criminal. Online Songs, Wendy Clear and Stockholm Syndrome should be on every set list ever!!!!
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
3 months
Listening to @talkSPORT now & my God. Idiots everywhere. The biggest myth about the Premier league is that it's competitive. City. Utd. Arsenal. Scousers. Chelsea. It doesn't change. There are, right now with current rules, 87 league clubs who'll NEVER win the top prize. 🧵..
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
4 months
@RealTolmie Can't we offer 40p and a pack of revels? That's what they gave us for Sané afterall
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 years
@Newhayparis Nah mate, they've got the dippers Monday night. They could get beat.. or the fans storm the pitch and get a points deduction when the games called off with their silly protest 😅.. Either way the cash out would go up 😉
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 years
@SamLee @strikeanywhere1 Yes pal, immediately after a drunken confession of reciprocated love from Stones and Walker - and Carson nicking the mic and shouting “we fucking hate losing” 😂😂
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
3 years
Danny Mills is stealing a living as a commentator here.. ..mind you, he stole a living as a footballer too 😅
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
1 year
@YoinkedMate Tragedy baiting is wrong, no two ways about it. I dont know any blue who would sing songs or goad re Hillsborough. Yet, you have the Steaua flag on display @ Anfield, mocking Everton for missing out in Europe - because of your fan base causing the deaths of 39. Grim.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 years
Hearing rumours that Cancelo wants out of the club. Hopefully not, but if true - show him the door. Not got time for mardarses who won’t put the graft in.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
1 year
Jake Humphrey is leaving BT sport to focus on his 'world class' breakfasts or whatever. Thank fuck for that. Man knows fuck all about football 😂.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
6 months
@barburtweeto @SkySportsPL Move down to the medium salsa on the burrito pal, you'll thank me later 😅
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
5 months
It's especially annoying as it's painting the majority of us as xenophobic - which is simply not the case. She's using this as bait for more clicks - when in reality this is simply an effort to ride City's coattails to make 💰 from an online persona
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
5 months
Not least when it's so thinly veiled & you either tweet about city, or selling pics of yourself half naked. If you wanna follow city, fine. Most will welcome you warmly. But don't cry foul when you're behaving as you are. It's not fair on other foreign and/or female fans. 🤷🏻‍♂️
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
8 months
@GreenJ92 He’s not a left back in a month of Sundays. Plays attacking mid for 🇪🇸, got 2nd best player at u17 World Cup (2nd to Foden) and top scorer at the u21 Euros. There’s ability there for sure.. just not at LB.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
7 months
@ a work thing in 🇸🇪 & have had too many 🍻, making up city words to every song 😂 🎵Gimme gimme gimme a ball from De Bruyne, Slide it through to Haaland for him to put awaay. Gimme gimme gimme a ball from De Bruyne, With Kevin in the middle we'll be champions in Maay🎵
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 years
@ladbible Any answer other than the one in the picture is wrong.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 months
Wherever @JackGrealish is tonight, here's to you sir. Better than that fucking shower of shit, hope you're getting another beer and living your best life 🍻
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
4 years
@City_Xtra Scousers watching him pick up a league winners medal like..
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
1 year
@FBAwayDays Barcelona away is worse boys
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
3 years
@abu_mohit @beahad1 @UtdSamm @afcDW Not sure Giggs is much of a legend at the minute pal 😬😅
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
3 years
@CityXtraPod Mate. Give him his due. He recognises talent. Bernardo on form literally walks into any club team in world football as a starter.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 years
@kelimarie92 Genuinely thought you gave an exceptional account of yourselves - first half frustrated us in a massive way. Nice to know there are some that enjoy watching us play though, there are plenty of PL fans (normally scouse) who think our football is boring.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
3 years
@RafaelH117 I think for most blues, Rafa, we're honestly not arsed. He was a decent player, not amazing, but contributed and we got a good sum on him.. so cheerio and move on. No hard feelings. I think he's been disrespectful in his comments though. Didn't need to be said simply.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 years
@bigbencorrie @RetroSolesUK @AlanShepo69 @adiFamily_ Alright pal, might be nothing, but there's a user on ebay selling masses of adidas (uk11) based in mcr. Claims "all left in a rental property by an evicted tennant and selling to recoup losses". Thought nothing of it @ 1st, but now 11 pairs & says "adding more every week"??
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
3 years
@CityXtraPod Which is precisely why every blue and proper England fan should be excited by Cole Palmer. Theres a blueprint there.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
3 years
@SamLee Ahh the old "You want sunglasses? No? You want cocaina?" 😂 Portugal hasn't changed a bit haha
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 years
@phil_bradburn Didn't the white power ranger wear this? 😅
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 years
Not gonna lie, that's absolutely mega. 😂😂 @ColinJohnBlair going international ✈️
@ymsoliz
Yvette Soliz
2 years
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 years
@SamLee Thought we were done sam. Genuinely thought we'd fucked it.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
4 years
@BlueWolf_09 @City_Chief @SamLee He shouldn't even be in the match day squad. I found it offensive to Stones that a player who wants out is picked ahead of him. I wouldnt play Garcia again. At all.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
3 months
Christ, someone's cutting onions. Death is fucking shit, but what a way to face it - eye to eye, wry smile and wringing every last drop out of life before the end. What a fucking man Rob Burrow was, is and forever will be.
@BBCBreakfast
BBC Breakfast
3 months
'By the time that you watch this I will no longer be here' A poignant final message from the Leeds Rhinos legend and MND campaigner recorded before his death for a special BBC documentary 'There's Only One Rob Burrow' @BBCOne @BBCiPlayer
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
3 years
@IanCheeseman I get your point entirely re values being quoted @IanCheeseman .. But then I remember: A. We're already the pantomime villains who everyone hates without any proper, credible basis B. Its not actually my money C. I want us to win EVERYTHING. My conclusion? SPEND THE LOT 😂😂
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
1 year
@YoinkedMate Oh I heard it. And as I said, the singing wasn't about Hillsborough. But you crack on with the pathological need to change the narrative. All you're doing is proving my point.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 years
@sportbible Wrong question guys. You should be asking what footballers people know because of @FootballManager . Absolute gems on the free transfer like Taribo West, Freddie Adu etc.. or signing players like Iker Munain, Klass Jan Huntelaar or Alex (the one who played for Cruzeiro) 👌🏻
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 years
@thebumchin @JayAllerton I walked in the door at 3pm on my last day working for Sage. Massively hung over, typical Jonny stag do style. My day finished at 5:30pm 😂
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 years
Awful news about that Cody Fisher, nobody should go on a night out & not come home 😔 23 man, no age. When I was 23, my only concern was who was getting the next round of jagerbombs - nowadays, you have to watch your back in case of tooled up idiots. Society is fucked 🤷🏻‍♂️
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
1 year
@YoinkedMate Wrong. It's the lack of accountability you show for anything. Attacking coaches, baiting EFC with Steaua flags, sending pics of baby coffins to David Silva... list goes on. Moaning at ticket allocation, instead of concern for the kid hit by a weighted pint thrown by your fans
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
1 year
@citehchants The "man with a spider on his head" and the "Alisson, not a 6ft4 brazillian, but a 45 Yr old single mum of 2 kids from Merseyside" had me pissing 😂😂😂
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
4 years
@SamLee wonder if this was a 'long game'... i.e. let UEFA make right tits of themselves in a very public forum. Revenge best served cold and all that?
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 years
@ladbible @sportbible Not the shout I expected.. but precisely why its the correct answer. 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
5 months
But using something people are so passionate about to exploit cash (especially currently) leaves a bad taste. You've only gotta see how blues have reacted to the club & season ticket increases - so doing it as an 'influencer'? You've got no chance.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
1 year
@Felix6ood I've got 12k points pal and ive had my season ticket near 20 years, who do I need to shag at the club to get the 26k that qualifies me for domestic aways 😂😂 Been to more Euro aways in the last 5 years than prem aways ha, not that I'm complaining 😎
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
3 years
@babyjo67 @Official_STFC @kylewalker2 Glad he had an awesome night. Exactly what its all about. @kylewalker2 is a gem, proud to have him at the club. 💙
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
11 months
We see a good man off today 🩵. It was a pleasure, Dryer. Here's to you 🍻
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
7 months
@balc_top @FootyAccums Appreciate the sentiment, but you're slightly incorrect. Our *cheapest* ticket is about £350, not our avg. My season ticket is £930 - but for the quality of football on display, I saw us do the league for that so I'm happy paying it. Our avg prob between £550 - £700
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
3 years
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
1 year
I want Oasis to reform as much as everyone.. but fuck man, Noel should stand trial for butchering 'Love will tear us apart'. It actually hurt my soul 😅😫 Poor Ian Curtis would be shaking even more than usual had he still have been alive.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
4 years
@FreddiePye_ He is, for me, arguably the best defensive midfielder to have ever played in the prem. For all Sergio's goals, Silva's assists and Kompany's unparalleled defensive leadership.. We are going to miss 'Dinho the most. He's been our engine for 7 years. Deserves a statue of his own.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
1 year
@emilybastow_ Phenomenal reference.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
3 years
@henrywinter @premierleague Kane has got away with murder for years Henry. Every time he backs into a player jumping for a header he puts them at risk. Don't get me wrong, I took great delight in the scousers dropping points, but Kane is reckless. Protected by the 'star England player' bias IMHO.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 years
@curtiswoodhous8 Let’s see off the yanks before we start taking the piss eh Curtis 😂. We haven’t qualified yet..
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
3 years
So @MENnewsdesk are reporting that #5thAve has closed for good It was a shit-hole.. but it was our shit-hole 💙 God bless you 5th, £1.50 vodka red-bulls, jägerbombs, Killing in the name of, & the smell of matey bubblebath Long live #foamparties !! #5thAve #Manchester #Indie
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
4 years
Why am I half expecting someone to do a mock up of that scooby doo image (see below) but this time with pep guardiola and Stuart Pearce. We're absolutely awful up top atm
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
5 months
Know this feeling all too well, and it's indescribable. Agüero's 94th-minute winner; and that first league win in decades will stay with me until the day I die. Enjoy every second of it.. not 'Neverkusen' anymore 🩵 Leverkusen will be on the piss for days 🍻 #prost
@bayer04_en
Bayer 04 Leverkusen
5 months
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 years
@oasis_groupie Difficult to pick a fav. Champagne Supernova is next level.. but so is Masterplan, Half the world away, Married with children, Hello, Morning Glory, Cigarettes & Alcohol, Shock of the Lightning, Importance of being idle.. The list is practically endless 👌🏻
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
1 year
@sarahafrance @owen_bhafc If we beat Chelsea on Sunday, your lot can have whatever you want haha. We'll play the u12's 😂.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
3 years
@BeersnBlues @England @BlueWolf_09 @PhilFoden Mate if he scores a volley against them there will be riots 😂
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
2 years
@offthebl @Fish10Phillip @EbanieBridges He did, now he’s wiping them off the keyboard 😅🤮
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
1 year
@adiFamily_ The Adidas Chile '62 - in the lighter brown. What a trainer 😍 The first pair as a teenager that I absolutely loved. Simplicity. Perfection.
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
11 months
Hi, @FA_PGMOL - given you're in such a sharing mood, can I request the release of the audio of the below incident, with a view to also replaying the game?! 😂
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@mancmaestro
Jonny
4 years
@thesolerestocks Yeeeeessss!!! Thank you @thesolerestocks ! Ordered!! Id given up hope on the Bel Airs, but even got blue light discount too!!! £148!!! Who needs #SNKRS !
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