Guys, Bros, Dudes, it's almost that time. Center City SIPS is just around the corner and I really need y'all to BRING IT this year. I want primo content on my TL all summer long. Crush 9 BLs by 6 pm. Fight in public plazas. Hit on unemployed 19 year olds in bandage dresses. LFG
Folks, you gotta tip. Always. Lyft. Postmates. Instacart. Uber. Door Dash. These services are not a God-given right, they’re luxuries. If you can’t afford to tip you can’t have gelato delivered to your house or a personal driver to take you to the bar. Walk your ass to the store
1/5 i see a lot of comments on the fact that the Minnesota Bail Fund has only paid 200k toward bail so far when they got 35M in donations. obviously it’s good to call for transparency, but it’s basically unconscionable to think that an organization of that size could spend
the most insane people in the world are on the Market Frankford Line. there’s just no comparison. an absolute carnival every single time. I say this as a lifelong Philadelphian who has taken SEPTA to school since I was 12. utter mayhem
i hardly drink beer anymore and especially not the big crafty shit i used to and last night i had five (5) 20 oz, 7% ABV porters and am praying, begging, for the sweet release of death
Just saw a man with 2 beards at the local hipster coffee shop spraypaint "whites rule" on the espresso machine then cast his vote for none other than B*rnie S*nders! (the coffee shop is also a polling place for some reason) Despicable.
5/5 is not a room full of staffers with access to some big Venmo account where they should just be shooting money out round the clock. and as always, please, do your research before you donate, and when in doubt, donate local.
to the guy practicing his golf swing in the coffee shop: holy shit it looks so good? we can all see the work you’ve been putting in. and there’s more than enough room for this in here so it’s perfect
2/5 that amount of money in this amount of time. nonprofits have operating budgets that are set way in advance, some are run by a Board of Directors that only meet once a month, many have little to no full-time staff. i used to work for a nonprofit with approx 500k annual
3/5 operating budget - if we got a flood of donations in under a week totalling 1M, let alone *35M*, i’m not exaggerating when i say it could take 3-6 months of planning to even figure out how to spend that money. that is a completely overwhelming figure and even the most
goPuff — the app that can deliver a dab pen, Plan B, $350 worth of Natty Light and a box of Cheez-Its straight to your door — is expanding their HQ in Philadelphia
4/5 massive organizations would not be able to dole out all of that money within a two-week time period or whatever people are calling for. this isn’t Brewster’s Millions. keep calling for financial transparency - it’s absolutely necessary - but understand an operation like that
congrats on this philly royalty collab
@BandofNOTHING
and
@tiredhandsbeer
. i had my
@RelapseRecords
shirt on earlier but changed for the birds. can’t think of a better beer for a sunday night eagles dallas matchup. the album is sick too
My Uber driver just told me “I am a pizza chef by trade. But pizza...it ruined my life...” it was so wistful and sad and I now curse the Pizza Gods in this sweet man’s name
working from home unlocked the ability to achieve my lifelong desire of eating pasta and other lunch type foods (fried rice, dumplings, soup) for breakfast and i do it frequently now and can’t recommend it enough
walking down the street today and a man with three teeth yelled "SEXY AS HELL" like 5 inches from my face so i yelled "WHAT THE FUCK BRO" back and startled the shit out of him. 10/10 would recommend
first tailgate of the season. broad st is foggy. mimosas and baileys coffees at
@Moochai7
’s for breakfast. dude yelled “white claw already??” at me when i walked out of my building at 9 am. yes sir. white claws already
go berds
yeah, why are all you fake introverts at brunch? i’ll remember this when i see you guys tweet “cancelling plans is better than heroin” but you couldn’t stay away from Garage for 36 hours
my uber driver just told me his ex’s name is Alexandria and also that i smell good “like food” and also “bitches ain’t shit, n***as ain’t shit” and then, of course, “happy Valentine’s day”
SEPTA is incredible because they are constantly finding new and unique ways to fuck your day up. Never the same mishandled catastrophe. Never the same bungled schedule or demolished commute. It is my most exciting and challenging toxic relationship
I forgot about the postseason game day energy in the city. Dudes in elevator heading to stadium with bottles in hand at noon. Uber driver blasting Meek on my ride to brunch. Go Birds is the only acceptable greeting between strangers. All we got all we need baby
never again will i take for granted the live music in my life...i am going to every show that ever exists when we are free. catch me @ the jazz gig. beers (soda?) at the christian rock show. the opera? meet you down in front. i will get into djent
False. It is total anarchy in an airport when it comes to social norms - regarding anything, really, but especially regarding drinking. Crab fries and two 32-oz beers at an airport Chickies at 9 am? Don’t mind if I do
the sips crowd are a resilient people but even they could not withstand the pandemic. let us pour a BL out for our fallen homies and i’m going to revisit some of my favorite twitter sips moments
Me: I’m going to run for President one day, I think
Danielle: you are a degenerate. Who is going to vote for you? All you are going to do is lower the drinking age. Also, you’re tweeting this from a bar at 2:30 pm. No one is going to vote for you
Keep your friends close kids
Fridays in quarantine:
@kribenz
& I have an early dinner together, then retire to our respective rooms - Sopranos for me; Xbox for him - and agree to meet in a common area approx 2.5 hours later, upon which we get to admire how much pregame damage the other one did on their own
my boyfriend is away for the weekend so you know what that means baby 😉time to be bad 😈yup i’m doin it😏going to watch all of selling sunset completely uninterrupted
i bought my dad a fancy bottle of bulleit for his 50th birthday :) and then he celebrated by drinking the whole thing and tearing my boyfriend
@kribenz
’s ACL
i’ve been riding all manners of septa routes, alone, since i was like 12? don’t own a car, never have. used septa to go to school/work nearly every day until a few weeks ago. i’m done man. it’s a horror show
girl behind me in line at tailgate porta potty heard that there was no TP left so gave me half of hers ✨angels are right here on earth baby!!! birds by a million
always a fan of these daily diaries of fitness influencers and trainers. “mentally organizing my daily goals” so like...you had thoughts? about your day? when you woke up?
is everyone trying to dunk on this casting talking about “representation” forgetting that this actually *is* representation for some of us? this is exactly what my parents look like and i would have never dreamed of seeing a family that looked like mine in Cheaper by the Dozen!
Zach Braff will star alongside Gabrielle Union in
#DisneyPlus
’ ‘CHEAPER BY THE DOZEN’ reboot. The story centers on a multiracial family managing their hectic home and family business. Kenya Barris wrote the script and Gail Lerner will direct. (Source: )
i'm not sure which 28 year old white dude needs to hear this but...............you absolutely do not have to start that podcast, and if you do, you most certainly do not need to email me about it
Watching RelationShep and
@ShepRose
just described this girl as "incredibly entertaining but also... alarming" which was so accurate and I will 100% be using it going forward
I know it's only preseason, but just had a moment of absolute nirvana at the gym: I remembered there's Eagles football tonight, so I put on Dreams & Nightmares & fantasized about tailgates & sausage and peppers & cases of beer & sunday funday now nothing can bother me anymore
Spent the night drinking Pilsners & jager at a heavy metal bar in Berlin then mainlined 3 cups of coffee this morning, forgetting that European coffee makes our coffee look like child’s play. That’s a fast track to a panic attack in the middle of a conference let me tell you!!!