Mike (y) @mikey_007_ Twitter profile

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Mike (y)

2 years

An only fans: but it’s just me playing 90’s sitcom guitar licks and eating spoonfuls of melted cheese. There has to be a demo for this

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

11 months

@keelsonwheels14 One time a girl, day of date wanted to change the time, location, then location again(all within an hour of our plans ) and when I said “whatever works best for you I guess” she canceled. And honestly, it was for the best.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

She got us kicked out of our second spot after she almost got into a fight over literally nothing. When I tried to defuse the situation she accused me of “not having her back”. I think I’ve finally found the one

Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

This girl I’m on a date with now is either going to my last crazy girl or my wife, no in between.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

The CEO of my company is retiring, should I apply to replace him?

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

The FAA being down is scary, thank god we as a nation have implemented a robust high speed rail system that can take the pressure off of airlines during this trying time.

Jayson Luber

@Denver7Traffic

2 years

There are planes in the air right now but no new departures are allowed by the FAA until after 7am our time.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

3 years

4th date tonight. She has an android and uses Amazon music, so I legit might be murdered but that’s part of the fun

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

5 months

My date today showed up as the most hung over girl in all of Chicago, in case anyone was wondering if I could still pick’em

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

Sara 🌴

@SarAllyce

1 year

Why are u as a man doing group fitness classes

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

Important announcement

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

East coast girls kinda scare the life out of me

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

7 months

I’m like 6 weeks into my new job and these are the slack messages I’m getting. I love it here

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

3 years

@StephNoh This is the thing about guys like LaVine. We judged him at 23 not being a full product(because he wasn’t) - growth isn’t always linear, but the warning signs were there. He always cared, he was in a bad spot with coaches/schemes/injuries ect. His emergence doesn’t surprise me

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

“You don’t get it, it’s different here, we turn the whole RIVER green and it becomes the biggest party day of the year. No where else like it”

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

@si_yonce Pre game is freeflowing, a power is when you play a mash up of songs one minute long and have to drink every-time the song changes.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

3 years

#top5favoritethings @babyjooj 1. On Repeat Spotify playlist 2. Nike flex Stride 5’ inch shorts 3. Taking over the TouchTunes at the bar 4. Drinking a Topo Chico on a week night acting like it’s a beer 5. drinking rosè 12 months and telling people “summer is a state of mind”

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

3 years

My buddies go to move for getting a date is by telling a girl he “has an extra ticket to the Cubs game” and seeing if she’ll say yes, and if she does he just goes and buys tickets. It’s honestly not that awful of a move.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

Paul McCartney coming out during the Taylor Hawkins tribute concert has me in my feels. Say what you want about the Beatles but that man has been the most famous musician in the world for 60 years and still cares as much as anyone.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

We hate it here

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

@nic_eags @illyy___ The amount of gaslighting this poor women has been though has to be endless.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

@mlscroggin Having grown up 20 minutes from Kenosha, I’ve met this exact man no less then 200 times

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

3 years

My 22 year old co-worker got me a thank you card for coming to his birthday lunch and that’s just so nice.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

Friday morning swim club. Everyone have a good day

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

Went on a date to a candle bar and made this cute lil’ candle. Happy Friday pals.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

I did not survive dry January(got close) but I did read 3 books and lose 5 pounds so, who’s the real loser

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

Checking in

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

My dream gf: -rings my bell -wears keds -wears white socks -current boyfriend drives an iroc -doesn’t know who I am -doesn’t give a damn about -doesn’t know what she’s missing -has an two ticket to Iron Maiden

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

7 months

Important announcement

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

We out here for real

Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

At a street fest and do I need a bucket of cheese fries? No. But do I want a bucket of cheese fries, yes I do.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

3 years

My birthday present to myself is champagne and Whole Foods pizza. Height of luxury some would say.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

Getting a couple tattoo is usually a bad idea, getting a couple tattoo with someone who’s been divorced 3 times, is a worse idea.

Page Six

@PageSix

1 year

Jennifer Lopez, Ben Affleck prove their ‘commitment’ with matching tattoos

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

Me and Tom Brady have a lot in common now just two single bros who don’t play in the NFL. A lot to bond over.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

We are living in the glenaissance and I for one and here for it

GQ Magazine

@GQMagazine

1 year

. @GlennHowerton is having a career-changing summer. After 16 seasons (and counting) on @alwayssunny , he debuted in his first starring movie role in #BlackBerry this May

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

It’s not much but it’s honest work - lets have a weekend ladies and gentlemen.

Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

It’s Friday afternoon and I need a slice of pizza and an old fashion asap

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

8 months

@shane_riordan I want it on the record, I saw your tweet then I immediately googled this service and sent my group chat and said “I have our next boys day idea” so

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

#Top5FavoriteThings @babyjooj 1. Someone genuinely loving the recommendation you gave them 2. A Well Curated Wine Bucket(preferably outdoors) 3. Taking a lap, when arriving to a social gathering 4. Calling everything my #1 rule 5. Poppin’ in for one

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

Before I take a sip would anyone be offended if I had an airport cocktail?

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

Hopefully this plays. Wish me luck

Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

Christmas party Friday, the attire is “elegant formal” and what the hell does that even mean.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

3 years

The T-Mac twos are a elite sneaker

Kicks Under Cost

@KicksUnderCost

3 years

On Sale: adidas T-Mac 2.0 Retro "USA" now $85, retail $130 Click here to order, no code needed-> ad

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

The guys at this bachelor party I’m at are wild. I woke up at 7:30AM CST to guys already 2 beers deep, it’s going to be a long weekend and I may not survive

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

I like my air quality like I like my women, prepared to kill me at any time.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

@lilydsmith I’m begging other dudes just to be normal. It isn’t hard

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

BREAKING: Dry January and I have decided to mutually part ways. sources at the scene have confirmed a large glass of rosè has been poured. “I’m Back” (PS let’s go @USMNT 🇺🇸🇺🇸)

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

Not to be dramatic but the time change has ruined my entire life.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

This queen(the dog) has to be put down tomorrow. And I’m very sad about it. That’s all

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

Life at the lake? = better

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

9 months

I start my new job Monday so this week I’ve decided is my personal rumspringa

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

Doses and mimosas

KFC Radio

@KFCradio

2 years

What song would save you from Vecna?

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

10 months

@madddiexo It’s not that I’m not rooting for you, it’s that Im so invested in rooting for her(the love of my life)

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

In what world would the person who parked behind me think this is okay? They should be set on fire

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

Fwiw it’s worth - I read the Nick Offerman memoir a few years back (build your own canoe, one man’s guide to living.) And he seems every bit as good of a dude as his last of us performance

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

3 years

@thetonygill Trading for DeShaun would *BE* the apology lol

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

A few days ago buddy asked me if his mom could use one of my songs for her tictok and said sure thinking it would get like 20 views, but apparently it’s going off and people are asking for the full song link. So I’ll remember you when I’ve made it

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

HER BOYFRIEND, HE DONT KNOW,ANYTHING ABOUT HER! HES TOO STONED, NINTENDO

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

3 years

A girl from Ohio tried to tell me “wicker park isn’t really Chicago” last weekend and I’m still shook

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

Life Tip: one thing I do every year around this time is start making a check list of things I want to do when it starts getting nice out. That when I free day or nothing going on, I go to the list and knock something off it.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

9 months

Pizza and bourbon Fridays. Lets ride

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

9 months

Fall of Mikey fr.

New York Post

@nypost

9 months

McDonald’s is giving out free fries every Friday for the rest of the year — here’s how to get them

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

6 months

main character stole the show

b.🪸

@Seaspringslayy

6 months

main character stole the show

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

Today counts as a summer Friday right? It feels like a summer Friday. Might log of a lil early, for laughs, as a a bit.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

Pizza Party Friday nights! And some angels envy to top it off. Hope everyone has one hell of a Friday night! I’m also hearing the bears fleeced the panthers? Is that true?

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

🥰🥰

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

3 years

Don’t mind me, enjoying my first aperol spritz of the summer. Elite cocktail

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

5 months

These will fix me. I’m sure of it

Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

5 months

Today seems like an excellent wing day to me

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

11 months

@keelsonwheels14 Yeah, not on your at all. Some people are just hopeless

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

For science

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

Confession: I’ve watched new girl before bed like every night for the better part of 5 years.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

8 months

So back

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

“Sweet tooth” is too cute of a word to describe what i have.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

7 am Sunday hot boy walks are undefeated strictly because the walk of shames/Uber drop offs you encounter.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

11 months

Announcement: I have started to update my fall playlist and I think the additions made might make it even better then last year. Stay tuned.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

Summer of mikey’

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

Happy holidays

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

Is it just me or do all the streaming services suck now? Literally all of them are overpriced and watered down with trash content

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

My entire timeline is people making fun of Aaron Rodgers, and this is good, I like it. Keep it up

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

@FifiDoYouLoveMe 3-5 sips of a full calorie Mountain Dew code red

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

3 years

My office scheduled a happy hour on a Monday and that should be pre-crime.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

3 years

No idea how this picture of me looking Handsome and brooding got on the TL - trying to delete

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

11 months

Car wash and oil change all before 9am and I fear I’m becoming my father

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

I bought a wine glass that is just the bottom of a high life bottle.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

I get to hear John Mayer play guitar in person tonight and while that might not be everyone’s thing, it’s extremely my thing. So I’m just a lil excited.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

6 months

@lilydsmith I personally follow you to watch you dunk on Ben Simmons any chance you get.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

11 months

Cheers’

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

Pizza party Friday nights!! Who wants a slice and who needs a cocktail?

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

Me and all my homies when the weather hits above 60 degrees

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

9 months

I just hope everyone is having a good weekend

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

I hope all the women in my life still have basic fundamental human rights tomorrow.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

Fighting for my life inside of the lake forrest oasis

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

Wing week meets bourbon Fridays! If you’re out celebrating St.Patrick’s day - I hope you’re having a blast. If you’re staying in and watching the tourney, hopefully the bets are hitting: if you’re doing anything else, enjoy the hell out of that too. You won’t find a bad vibe here

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

1 year

Forgot to do bourbon Fridays so we pivot

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

2 years

I have a date tomorrow and she just asked to move from the cozy cool logan square bar we agreed to, to a river north bar her sister bartends at and I can already feel this failing.

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Mike (y)

@mikey_007_

3 years

When you talk bad about Gray*on All*n and buck fans find it. “Drugged up bad bitch” I consider a compliment tbh