murph @mickmami Twitter profile

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murph

@mickmami

8 months

and what if I said I did it better?

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murph

@mickmami

1 month

that pretty girl you saw on public transport went home and thought about you btw

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murph

@mickmami

3 months

wait you're a single mom with a mixed baby??? how did this grift literally end in less than a week 😭😭

Lilly

@thelillygaddis

4 months

If you’re you’re not getting knocked up you’re a loser

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murph

@mickmami

1 month

serious question: what do single men do on sundays??

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murph

@mickmami

2 months

shaking my head while bouncing on it so he knows I have a boyfriend....

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murph

@mickmami

22 days

i could fix your life.. or ruin it...

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murph

@mickmami

1 month

say whatever you want but the fact that hawk tuah never abandoned her sidekick is actually kinda sweet to me

Haliey Welch

@HalieyWelchX

1 month

Show us all ur memes 👇👇👇

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murph

@mickmami

2 months

they should invent an alcohol that doesn't make you want to bounce on your best friend

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murph

@mickmami

15 days

this is what men turn into after three beers

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murph

@mickmami

12 days

say whatever you want but the fact that hawk tuah is feeding the homeless is actually really wholesome

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murph

@mickmami

3 months

@dillonb0711 check the replies

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murph

@mickmami

2 months

why do men go quiet after the third beer???

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murph

@mickmami

13 days

this could fix you btw

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murph

@mickmami

1 month

that pretty girl at the airport you'll never see again is actually the love of you life btw

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murph

@mickmami

14 days

going to tell a random man he looks cute to invariably change the course of his life

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murph

@mickmami

2 months

your future wife is out there waiting for you to get your shit together btw

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murph

@mickmami

3 months

@MaggieAustenx you deserve better!!

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murph

@mickmami

1 month

who's going to tell all these men their mom has a hoe phase too???

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murph

@mickmami

24 days

going to smile at a random guy to make his day better

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murph

@mickmami

1 month

calling a random guy "good boy" today to invariably change the course of his life

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murph

@mickmami

1 month

sydney sweeney posting thirst traps rn, this is a declaration of war...

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murph

@mickmami

24 days

the sluttiest thing a man can do is asking if you got home safely

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murph

@mickmami

3 months

does anyone need a sydney sweeney body double on their boat today??

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murph

@mickmami

23 days

this is what guys turn into after three beers

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murph

@mickmami

1 month

stop sending this to me...

cinesthetic.

@TheCinesthetic

1 month

sydney sweeney via ig

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murph

@mickmami

13 days

smiling at a man is the single most powerful thing you could do to change the world everyday

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murph

@mickmami

1 month

your future wife is unhappily drinking beer at a party waiting for you to get your shit together

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murph

@mickmami

3 months

@chumblings is it you?

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murph

@mickmami

5 months

@christiansbale what is this even advertising??

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murph

@mickmami

1 month

@p8stieNcloudyRG it's true 🥺

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murph

@mickmami

2 months

@motherquoter @BaharOstadan do you even have a job like?? 😭

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murph

@mickmami

2 months

asking random guys if they're a grower or shower and sighing loudly at whatever they say

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murph

@mickmami

2 months

if a man sleeps before 12am it's an ick, like sleep tight little princess!!

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murph

@mickmami

17 days

men turn 25 and immediately start looking like this

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murph

@mickmami

1 month

a few dry handjobs never hurt a friendship...

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murph

@mickmami

2 months

he was so real for this..

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murph

@mickmami

1 month

dating isn't hard, you're just not shameless enough

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murph

@mickmami

1 month

it doesn't count as a body if nobody finds out btw...

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murph

@mickmami

2 months

@dril @YanHervieux @RobDenBleyker bring the real drill back

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murph

@mickmami

2 months

my brother is mad at me because his friend are asking him embarrassing questions 😭

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murph

@mickmami

1 month

just got hit up by a hollywood agent is this real life???

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murph

@mickmami

1 month

they should invent a boyfriend who doesn't get mad when you have fun

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murph

@mickmami

2 months

this is no longer a flex because of the implications..

Pop Crave

@PopCrave

2 months

Sweden’s Mondo Duplantis breaks the Pole Vault world record, clearing 6.25m at the #Olympics to win Gold.

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murph

@mickmami

22 days

tall men have been spoiled by society, the men who treat you best are probably like 5'7"

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murph

@mickmami

26 days

your future wife is going to look really pretty at the club tonight btw

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murph

@mickmami

2 months

PSA: it doesn't count as a body if he lasts less than ten minutes btw

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murph

@mickmami

25 days

stop sending this to me

pop vibes

@popsvibe

27 days

Sydney Sweeney in Euphoria

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murph

@mickmami

2 months

what's a few bounces between friends?

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murph

@mickmami

24 days

the fact that Hawk Tuah is probably on a north korean hitlist rn is so funny

Haliey Welch

@HalieyWelchX

24 days

Thx Korea! I had so much fun 🫶

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murph

@mickmami

13 days

I love how animals have a way of saying "don't go" and it involves sleeping against you 🥹

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murph

@mickmami

13 days

this is what men turn into when you call them a good boy

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murph

@mickmami

1 month

the love of your life is getting ready for her minimum wage job rn waiting for you to get your shit together....

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murph

@mickmami

2 months

how it feels to change your own oil

murph

@mickmami

2 months

will be working on a car today, add mechanic to my list of talents..

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murph

@mickmami

1 month

what happened to saying hi??

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murph

@mickmami

21 days

your future wife is waking up and wondering why you aren't next to her btw..

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murph

@mickmami

1 month

just found out my dad might be following me what do I do now 😫

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murph

@mickmami

22 days

we've evolved beyond the need for a Jack Black as a society

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murph

@mickmami

2 months

saw a skinny guy at the gym. immediately locked eyes with him, tightened my glutes and proceeded to squat his entire body weight until he left.

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murph

@mickmami

14 days

life becomes so beautiful when you exceed the daily recommended intake of caffeine

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murph

@mickmami

1 month

it's so insulting when a guy walks by you and doesn't even turn his head around, like who do you think you are??? 🙄

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murph

@mickmami

2 months

asked my dad if he still thinks about his childhood crush and he immediately got the thousand yard stare

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murph

@mickmami

1 month

what if I told you that girl from high school you had a crush on is thinking about you rn?

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murph

@mickmami

1 month

this is a safe space for short kings (under 6') and I LOVE all of you!!

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murph

@mickmami

27 days

the love of your life is probably waking up rn and yearning for you btw

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murph

@mickmami

1 month

beginning to realize we might be related

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murph

@mickmami

19 days

going to call a random man "sweetie" today to change the course of his life

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murph

@mickmami

2 months

the feminine urge to brick him up and do nothing about it...

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murph

@mickmami

12 days

say no more

flargo

@sorkincel

12 days

I respect that virginia is for lovers but we need a state for haters

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murph

@mickmami

2 months

the single most attractive thing a guy can do is just being insanely chill

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murph

@mickmami

4 months

it's worse because they used to be gym buddies but they've been weirdly distant recently. I don't care at all though.

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