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@lllliatttt

2 years

this is where i post from:

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@BinorRaja

@postage1

@yaritta2012

@SandipM65760483

@KddBrry

@TopSocrates

@edgeslayer

@karstensen83

@PimmsSevran

@bokeplokalmalam

@willafton1962

@Sufiyan37127828

@JosephJPSMGolf

@PugsThatFud

@hackersalander

@dorekdf

@RupiReportero_

@hariai_kasumi

@TheHockeyIndia

@yellingyielle

@usRiley143670

@KofonanAsante

@JenXIsWaving

@TochuF1

@NetflixID

@Bayfikoo

@2Fqu22JEknYCpCp

@SkySportAustria

@cashmere_HRZ

@BienczykMarkus

@LiatAjaX

@Rommy_MarCo

@Colette5629

@jromerf

@La_U_Re_N

@angelHerrerama7

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@lllliatttt

1 year

we paid a teenager in the park $10 to draw us btw

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@lllliatttt

2 years

they should invent something other than time that heals all wounds

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@lllliatttt

8 months

did a hippo write this

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@lllliatttt

3 months

shout out to the “male loneliness epidemic,” gotta be one of my favorite consequences for your own actions

TrustLion

@Trust_Lion_

3 months

Girl I went to college with dm'd me on LinkedIn to see what I was up to and ask if I was still around the area we went to school and if "I wanted to get coffee". I deferred the invite for "indefinite" but pondered why she dm'd me I remembered later I asked her out junior(?) year

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@lllliatttt

7 months

human life is brief, only yapping endures eternal

horse dentist

@equine__dentist

7 months

love that hating transcends generations

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@lllliatttt

3 months

there are summer fruits everywhere for those with the eyes to see

erin

@ratsnotagain

3 months

🍓

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@lllliatttt

1 year

got my apartment’s rent history and i am going to throw up

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@lllliatttt

1 month

flew a little too close to the “egirl with offline boyfriend” fantasy sun and found myself on a very quiet date w a man in his 30s who has never had a social media account or smartphone how did we meet, you ask? he recently started using bumble dot com for desktop

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@lllliatttt

1 year

oh my goddddddd the airbnb bathroom is TILED WITH ROCKS

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@lllliatttt

14 days

well, having an all-building group chat was fun for about 36 hours

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@lllliatttt

2 months

he SAID he wants to hear those club classics

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@lllliatttt

1 year

Mika

@0pvlent

1 year

just watched a man literally flip a coin on a moving train and unblock a contact labeled "ABSOLUTELY NOT" and text them "hey" with a slutty amount of Ys

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@lllliatttt

1 year

my unpopular opinion is that it’s way cooler to have no tattoos than like 6 tiny doodley ones

rex 🏊‍♀️

@guess_what_mimi

1 year

Being the only person my age without some doodle-looking tattoo(s) on my arms

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@lllliatttt

1 year

regret to inform u all that not only did the elderly couple in line behind us at veselka asked if they could take some photos of us bc we look so sweet together, the waitress then informed us our personal photographer was the peter of peter paul and mary

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@lllliatttt

1 month

we each have truly lived a thousand lives since that moment

Know Your Meme

@knowyourmeme

1 month

On this day one year ago, @kylegordon101 posted a TikTok that had a text overlay reading, "Every European Dance Song in the 1990s."

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@lllliatttt

1 year

my friend kaly’s brother is dating a formerly amish girl (she only left the community like 3 years ago) and one time kaly was asking if she has any comfort foods or favorite meals that make her feel good and she just went “oh, you mean milk soup!”

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@lllliatttt

1 year

not having a crush is so boringggg need the zookeepers to lower someone hot into my enclosure for enrichment time

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@lllliatttt

8 months

once a year i check this list and see if they’ve invented any new ones

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@lllliatttt

1 year

having a boyfriend is so educational

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@lllliatttt

4 months

ive been muttering “diet pepi pepi diet mountain dew” to myself all morning

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@lllliatttt

8 months

spoooook

@throne_ofbones

9 months

calling your partner "my love" is cringe.

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@lllliatttt

5 months

speaking of tortured poets, today seems like as good a day as any to read, really sit with, and (crucially) be inspired to action by the work of palestinian writers, who are being executed, imprisoned, starved, displaced, and *literally* tortured

Gaza Poets Society

@PoetsGaza

5 months

but if we resist, they kill us.

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@lllliatttt

2 months

is kamala brat? is taylor swift my community? is my bank a democrat? is that corporation my friend? how am i driving? how does an engine work? how could a loving god cause such agony

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@lllliatttt

2 months

chat is this real

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@lllliatttt

9 months

toddlers right before being eaten by a pit bull

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@lllliatttt

1 year

BREAKING: Jason Derulo has fallen down the Boston cop slide

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@lllliatttt

4 months

i love being a pedestrian i loove having the right of way it is like a drug to me

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@lllliatttt

1 year

do retvrn to office freaks know that when you work from home you can have a slice of warm buttered toast whenever you want? do they know that you can have a slice of warm buttered toast maybe even with jam and you can eat it on the couch while it’s still warm

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@lllliatttt

1 year

i’ve had sex with one british guy and he went “ooo that’s lovely” the whole fuckin time

river

@kissmeriver

1 year

british porn is so insane why did this bottom just say “your cock is so splendid” 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

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@lllliatttt

10 months

they really said

philip lewis

@Phil_Lewis_

10 months

WASHINGTON (AP) — White House: Israel agrees to 4-hour daily 'humanitarian pauses' in fighting in Northern Gaza to allow civilians to flee.

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@lllliatttt

2 years

whenever i tell normal people i just dropped our of grad school their response is like “awww it’s okay you’ll get back on the horse someday” but when i tell people who went to grad school??? they pick me up on their shoulders and carry me around the room chanting my name

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@lllliatttt

1 year

Jon

@BiggestttHater

1 year

what is y’all most liked tweet?

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@lllliatttt

17 days

mr. worldwide man of his word

Pop Crave

@PopCrave

18 days

Kesha has been re-credited in the title of “Timber” on YouTube after her name was mysteriously removed.

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@lllliatttt

1 year

washington DC is a city that dares to ask the question: what if everyone was 35

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@lllliatttt

14 days

“it’s giving you like it” 💀

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@lllliatttt

1 year

speaking of lifespan, can we ask him the secrets of why the average life expectancy graph for cambodia looks like this? maybe at some sort of war crimes tribunal?

Peter Baker

@peterbakernyt

1 year

Henry Kissinger turns 100 years old tomorrow and his son reflects on the secrets of his longevity. Hint: It's not the diet heavy on bratwurst and Wiener schnitzel.

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@lllliatttt

3 months

“why would an old friend possibly want to reconnect? it must be because i make $70,000 a year and her uterus is about to shrivel into a raisin”

TrustLion

@Trust_Lion_

3 months

Like what's the thought process here? "Hey guy who I was friends with years back, and asked me out that one time (that I shut down hard). I see you have a reasonably well-paying career, want to meet up?". I didn't even remember that until hours later, but now I'm just offended

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@lllliatttt

1 year

learned about the existence of women who aren’t compulsively sexually attracted to mustaches today

Cat Elgarrista

@cat_elg

1 year

those 5 minutes when a man is shaving and all that’s left is the mustache and he’s walking around saying “maybe i’ll keep it” are the most terrifying 5 minutes of a woman’s life

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@lllliatttt

1 year

a vintage store in williamsburg was selling this wet seal vest for $70 lmaooo

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@lllliatttt

1 year

william blake was SO real for this like i do want!!! i want i fuckin WANT!!!!!’!!

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@lllliatttt

2 years

when i got jury duty i rlly rlly wanted to be on a jury during voir dire i tried to answer everything SUPER thoughtfully so when they asked if i could be objective about a certain issue, i said “i do, to the extent that objectivity exists” they kicked me out IMMEDIATELY

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@lllliatttt

14 days

But tonight he is alive and in the north field with his mother. It is a perfect summer evening: the moon rising over the orchard, the wind in the grass. And as he stares into the sky, there are twice as many Steve Harveys as usual.

David Dennis Jr.

@DavidDTSS

14 days

There’s a light projection of Steve Harvey over Atlanta right now and I have no clue why

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@lllliatttt

3 months

honestly she really might be a gold digger bc she sure as shit wouldn’t want you for that mass shooter manifesto you call a personality

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@lllliatttt

1 year

a meme that came to me in a dream

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@lllliatttt

2 months

delighted by this person who seems to have had a town crier-like reaction to loving the new charli album and desperately needed to inform the public about it the only way they could think to

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@lllliatttt

2 years

hi um does anyone have advice for dealing with heartbreak when no one did anything wrong? i’ve never not been mad before and it turns out that this feels Worse

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@lllliatttt

1 year

i hope the girl who makes those tiktoks where she narrates her hijabi kitten named sister minnie’s bad behavior in rhyming couplets is having a particularly blessed ramadan

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@lllliatttt

2 months

if i were dishonest woman perjuring myself for likes i would make a post “this car is soo brat coded “ but because i cannot help but Speak the truth i will tweet : shrek coded. look at the Ears

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@lllliatttt

2 months

i was involved in a challengers-type situation at a quiz bowl tournament in wayzata, minnesota in 2011

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@lllliatttt

3 months

send eric adams to the hague i’m so serious

Gothamist

@Gothamist

3 months

After budget cuts, NYC's libraries can't fix broken air conditioners amid heat wave

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@lllliatttt

1 year

i can’t believe the british version of uber eats is called deliveroo they are so fuckin GOOFY like do you hear yourselves???

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@lllliatttt

1 year

BORN TO DAWDLE FORCED TO HASTEN

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@lllliatttt

1 year

babe wake up new shape just dropped

Gizmodo

@Gizmodo

1 year

Mathematicians Excited About New 13-Sided Shape Called 'the Hat'

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@lllliatttt

1 year

this video has great vibes and it’s very cool illustration of how “union auto workers” =\= white men !

Russ McNamara

@McNamaraWDET

1 year

@UAW workers here in Centerline walking off the job to strike right at noon. @wdet

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@lllliatttt

2 years

why do you as a man have a summer birthday

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@lllliatttt

4 months

called 311 to report my building not installing mailbox locks for 6+ months and now making tenants pick up all mail at the post office a mile away and when i told the operator the name of the management company he literally sighed and said “of course it’s wavecrest. OF COURSE!”

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@lllliatttt

1 year

my least favorite type of mother’s day content

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@lllliatttt

1 year

Asscela Express 🥥🌴

@biz_socks

1 year

How do you serve cunt in a way supports public transportation?

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@lllliatttt

1 year

they should invent an iphone weather app that shows you the weather in addition to ombré sky vibes

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@lllliatttt

2 years

i will reveal what book this is in the next tweet but before you look please tell me what book it would most piss you off for this to be the epigraph of

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@lllliatttt

1 year

bubble tea balls

@CH3RRYMOCHA

1 year

Girls notes app be like: - grocery lists - childhood trauma - travel plans - draft breakup text - baby names - situationships - appointment reminders - gut-wrenching paragraphs about worst life experiences - deepest darkest fears - passwords

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@lllliatttt

14 days

men would literally rather film a woman in her own home than go to therapy

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@lllliatttt

1 year

like it actually seems like there hasn’t been any illegal shit (tho i didn’t actually go in and calculate all the percentages) but now i can’t stop thinking about what it would be like to pay $400 a month instead of five times that

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@lllliatttt

1 year

this one woman on love is blind is constantly like “i’m 36 i thought it was too late for me to find love” which is WILD and then at her bridal fitting her mom is like “i thought i’d never see you walk down the aisle… this is a LONG time coming” and i’m like oh i see now lol

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@lllliatttt

9 months

suddenly remembered my high school production of hamlet where the drama teacher decided that the only actor with the gravitas to play claudius was…. himself the cast was 15 teenagers and a man in his 40s with a highlighted pompadour, dark wash denim, and a silver skull ring

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@lllliatttt

1 year

can’t stop thinking about bowen yang revealing jeremy strong wandered over to a neighboring set and asked where the bathroom was and then later a succession crew member came to explain it’s part of his “method” and he had an upcoming scene where kendall asks where the bathroom is

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@lllliatttt

1 year

the ingredients for amish milk soup, you ask? - milk - sugar - melted butter

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@lllliatttt

4 months

EXCUSE me??

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@lllliatttt

2 months

TheCussingChef💋

@DaSixFoota2022

2 months

Love these!!

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@lllliatttt

4 months

at this point it’s not even worth remarking on the irony of columbia’s student reporters being forced back into fucking PULITZER hall to keep them from reporting on police brutality elsewhere on campus

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@lllliatttt

2 years

him: you must be paul hollywood standing on a famous balcony where lenin gave a speech if you think we’re fucking me:

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@lllliatttt

2 years

me and the girls uncovering a man’s entire digital footprint using only his first name and one of his interests

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@lllliatttt

10 months

the boyfriend of my friend is not my friend—he’s my comedy partner. he sets them up and i knock em down

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@lllliatttt

1 month

i will say he’s a very good texter, i had no idea! many of u should worry less about upgrading to the latest iphone and more about updating the girl you’re talking to on what time you’re available

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@lllliatttt

1 year

what if we kissed in

Bulldoozer

@Bulldoozerbrick

1 year

The secret Muppet storage cabinet at the Smithsonian.

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@lllliatttt

7 months

hey does anyone know how a person should be

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@lllliatttt

2 years

@HRHCOLLECTION looks like you found a website that sells bras, great job!

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@lllliatttt

3 months

to the cool girl at the coffee shop i’m sorry for calling your scruffy schnauzer mix “an interesting little grinch” i intended it as the highest possible praise

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@lllliatttt

2 years

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@lllliatttt

2 years

@arjona777

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@lllliatttt

1 year

cannot possibly express enough how much this man next to me on the train was A) at least 50 years old and B) going THROUGH it

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@lllliatttt

1 year

referring to alvin and the chipmunks as alvin et al

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@lllliatttt

3 months

@ReelSmartCookie i mean my official position is that he made this whole thing up bc in no universe has this man ever had a female friend

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@lllliatttt

2 years

buccal fat? you mean guanciale??

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@lllliatttt

23 days

@SaeedDiCaprio he had so much fun at pride!

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@lllliatttt

1 month

how does one tell a person with a T9 keyboard that you accidentally invented cancel culture as a teenager

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@lllliatttt

1 month

does anyone know if we have to stun in new photo tomorrow

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@lllliatttt

1 year

just watched a guy at the fancy new bakery hug his employee friend (who came out to greet him, skipped him to the front of the line, leant his group a tray and big kitchen knife to take outside and cut their sandwiches) and then make a point to select the lowest tip percentage

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@lllliatttt

1 year

how bout they/them apples

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@lllliatttt

5 months

in college i was one of about a dozen students expelled the week before graduation for a peaceful protest against a white supremacist the school paid thousands of $ to come speak the school downgraded the expulsions to suspensions ONLY bc faculty voted to boycott commencement

Tage Rai

@tage_rai

5 months

I would hope that Columbia Faculty see their admin arresting their own students for peaceful protest as a red line. These students are in our care. Our primary responsibility as academics is to nurture their minds and protect them from oppression. Faculty must walk out now.

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@lllliatttt

15 days

if amanda gorman is such a good writer, why do i only ever hear her poems when she's the opening act for a war criminal

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@lllliatttt

1 year

we have got to shut down youtube

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@lllliatttt

7 months

can’t say how i but i recently came into 50k in cash. what do you think i should spent it on? and don’t say a floral shoe box, it already came with one

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@lllliatttt

2 years

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@lllliatttt

1 year

this is what we’re fighting for ✊

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@lllliatttt

1 year

wait i just found out that in the family therapy episode of succession when you see these marks on logan’s back they’re meant to be scars from childhood abuse?? this whole time i thought it meant he was dicking marcia DOWN

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@lllliatttt

9 months

all i’ll say is that i dropped out of columbia social work school last year in no small part because your median social worker in training turns out to be a 22 y/o named emily who thinks that morningside heights is a dangerous neighborhood

ava

@westcoastwinter

9 months

White woman who gave up her career as a SOCIAL WORKER to be an influencer gallivants around on some Eat Pray Love bullshit and has the gall to come back to Canada and start bitching about how strangers who are clearly in the throes of mental health crises make her feel “unsafe”

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@lllliatttt

1 year

this is picking up & spreading outside NYC so context: the saddest part is that though i pay $2k/month (rent stabilized 1bed) it’s still considered a really good deal! the CHEAPEST apartment currently available for rent on streateasy in my neighborhood is a studio for $2,400

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@lllliatttt

10 months

NO WAY

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@lllliatttt

1 year

“Often father and daughter look down on mother (woman) together. They exchange meaningful glances when she misses a point. They agree that she is not bright as they are, cannot reason as they do. This collusion does not save the daughter from the mother's fate.”

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