Kelly Welles @kelly_welles Twitter profile

Last Seen Profiles

@benharper11

@Drmeter_

@WBAFCOfficial

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@xarcasticbitch

@xotticiam

@isJNSFW

@Mo7Hrb

@andres_saibene

@SOTpay

@Awalkha53385061

@DoreKamma

@kasiwa_100

@ProfMAndersen

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@TwistysExile

@DrBirute

@ted130131

@stwmaniax

@SulemanSButt

@Khadiye_Sex

@JustYosee

@lonelyme4fun

Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

To commemorate #InternationalWomensDay , some of my favourite pics of women being badasses. First up, Saffiyah Khan.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

You annual reminder that Rage Against the Machine are a political band. The clue is in the name so I probably wouldn't be shocked if they make political statements.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 years

Big fan of Venezia FC. Huge.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

Danuta Danielsson.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

Rosa Fucking Parks.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

Elizabeth Eckford.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

Kathrine Switzer.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

Tess Asplund.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

Pussy Riot on trial in Russia.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

FEMEN, generally.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

6 months

Genuinely one of the most unhinged sentences ever committed to the page.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

6 months

APPEASE THE LESBIANS

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

4 months

It’s hilarious how we’re living in The Thick of It now. Ahem.

Nick Pettigrew

@Nick_Pettigrew

4 months

Press photo from his flight to NI. Seriously, though. His handlers really, *really* hate him, don’t they?

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

Apparently Aliens is 35 this year. I always pretend to be Vasquez when I get the big hedge trimmer out.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

4 years

Oh mate.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 years

The sins of the father apparently extends to haircuts.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 years

Sad to report that we're still in the 'but they've got mobile phones & big tellies' phase of discussing poverty.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

5 years

Trump: Megan should WIN first before she TALKS! Finish the job! Megan Rapinoe:

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

4 years

Ahem 👀

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

9 months

Among his finest work, this. RIP Shane 💔

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

The Spectator's article about Rashford is late because they had to remove all the unsupported 'facts' and parts that made them look a bit racist. Here's what it looks like now.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 years

When he was ten years, Phil Foden was told he could have incredible football talent but only if he kept this haircut forever. He accepted.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 years

I love him. The question was 'name something with a door' and he looks like he's forming an explanation of quantum theory.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 years

Someone was going to. Might as well be me.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 years

Karen on the Nicky Campbell phone in is in tears because this whole thing with Boris is reminding her of the bit in the Lion King with the hyenas circling. I wish this was satire.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 years

@ellehardy

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

I've never seen this Jaws artwork before 🔥🔥

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

4 years

Oh hello BBC Sport. You got bold. *bats eyelashes*

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

1 year

Just read that Athletic piece. TL:DR He did a bad thing but he's really really good at football and we're trying to figure out a way to sneak him back on the pitch without it all kicking off too much.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 years

If you think Southgate is an embarrassment to England, google 'Joey Barton cigar'.

We’re Here To Save Football

@Joey7Barton

2 years

Can’t believe Southgate hasn’t resigned yet. That’s two World Cups and a home European Championship we could/should have won. Stop rewarding failure. Got to go. Time to hire somebody who can win. Pizza Hut advert years ago. Enough said. 📦

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

“… really inconvenient allegation I’m refusing to deal with.”

ESPN FC

@ESPNFC

3 years

"I got this"

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

Jasmine Golubovska. (HT @tim_brannigan )

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

From this point on this is basically an Andy Murray stan account.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 months

What he said.

Fabrizio Romano

@FabrizioRomano

3 months

🔴🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 Mason Greenwood, Player of the Season for Getafe… with Manchester United already working to sell him this summer. Active talks taking place to find the best solution with #MUFC determined to make profit with Mason’s sale. One to watch in the next weeks.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 years

Man accused of rape: still widely respected in his profession, perceived as the model pro & a great influence on young players. Man refuses to do the job he is paid magnificently for & throws a petty strop: 'I've lost respect for him.' Go home, football. You're drunk.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 years

It’s so effing on brand for this country that The Revolution will start at Centre Parcs.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

As it's officially Rosie Jones Day, I'd like to repost my favourite image of her being pushed over in the street by the bully Nish Kumar.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

1 year

How’s he missed the target from there, Clive?

Chris Sutton

@chris_sutton73

1 year

There is no 606 tonight. I hope Gary Lineker and the BBC resolve this messy situation and Gary is back on MOTD soon but I’d have loved to have worked on our football phone in tonight and chatted about football and all of the days games.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

5 years

Gonna put this pic of @amandapalmer , @neilhimself & Margaret Atwood on my bedside table in a frame and pretend they're my immediate family. (I'm too old to be their kid but fully prepared to put my knees in my shoes for this).

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

Today is a day when people pay attention to domestic violence/toxic masculinity issues in football so I'm going to drop a few articles I've written about it here.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

Lads, this is real and important. If you're out tonight and have a mate who's a bit of a prick, tell him. A lot of men don't listen to women. If you want to help us, this is what you can do.

NCDV - National Centre For Domestic Violence

@NCDV_Official

3 years

Not everyone is looking forward to the match tonight... Instances of domestic abuse increase 26% when England play and 38% if they lose. #DomesticAbuse #DomesticViolence #EURO2020

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

4 years

I die.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

11 months

And then they ask why we’re ‘uptight’. You cannot even celebrate without some effing deviant copping a feel.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

6 months

Bit different when he’s on the shill for Paddy Power, mind. #AppeaseTheLesbians

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 months

@SamWhyte What would all the men who book in Teams meetings WHEN AN EMAIL WOULD COVER IT do then mate?

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 years

You have a voice that millions of people listen to and you choose to do this with it.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 years

Celebrating Luka Modric by reupping the best tweet that’s ever happened.

Nooruddean

@BeardedGenius

5 years

Modric looks like your gobby neighbour Pamela who’s the cock of the avenue cos of her three big sons

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 years

Erling Partridge.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

5 years

Sameshima worked at the Fukushima plant to support herself during her early career. Won 2010 Asian Games, WC in 2011 playing every game, runner up WC 2015, winner 2018 Asian cup. But no, you’re right. She did a shit throw in so cancel all women’s football.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 years

A moment’s silence for Demi who is facing a tough shift.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

Few people realise how inspiring it is for young girls to look up and see a woman doing stuff. When I was growing up there were so few. Now look...

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 months

DAY OF THE TRIFFICS 😃

Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 months

This looks like some harrowing glimpse of the future from an 80s BBC sci fi drama.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

4 years

This is the most beautiful way of telling people they should be fucking ashamed of themselves that I've ever seen.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

4 years

Your weekly reminder that Piers Morgan is not a good bloke because he's saying obvious things during a pandemic.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

1 year

'How is British Twitter reacting to the baffling takes by the gun lobbyists after the Nashville shooting?' 'They are doing god's work.'

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

5 years

I'm thinking of starting an account on which I just post pics of men being massive pricks on #PoliticsLive & women reacting. It makes me so happy.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

10 months

Reading this thread is like being beaten to death in slow motion. Enjoy!

sonch

@soncharm

10 months

Using AI, I was able to take some old painting and make it better. First the painting. Notice how you can barely see what's even going on. Where even is this? Who are the people? Huh? You're too far away to really see the setup. Whole left side blank. Nothing here to grab onto.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

Shirley Manson from @garbage . Her willingness to discuss imposter syndrome and self-harming was really influential to me & how I write.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

Gonna wear this and a mask. I’ll probably be battered to death in the queue at Tesco ❄️❄️

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 years

Photo of the day.

Project Football EPL

@ProjectEPL

2 years

Thiago doesn’t want another Haaland to dominate football in 20 years time 🤣

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

4 years

Phil Neville here, genuinely surprised that women have mad ambition too.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

6 months

As a feminist and a pacifist, I say let the seven time world kick boxing champion and the desperately embarrassing misogynistic ex-footballer sort it out in a pub car park. Tops off.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

4 years

Have to assume they discovered this while looking for a Covid vaccine.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

Why are some people upset at Ronaldo's return to Manchester United? @samwhyte and I offer a few suggestions.

Cristiano Ronaldo: What we do in the shadows

(Photo by Matthew Peters/Manchester United via Getty Images) It was the summer of 2009 and the biggest transfer in football history was about to be announced. The gangly eighteen-year-old with croo…

kellywelles.com

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

9 months

An adult has entered the chat.

Hayters TV

@HaytersTV

9 months

Emma Hayes responds to Joey Barton 🗣 🔗

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 years

Wrote an open letter to @GaryLineker about last night's Depp/Heard gag. He won't read it but I hope you do.

Gary Lineker: Have a word with yourself

Dear Gary, You’re an alright bloke, y’know. You were a decent player, blah blah, you’ve given a home to a Ukrainian refugee, you trigger the Daily Mail and its associated panto villains on an hourl…

kellywelles.com

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

4 years

Rebecca Front's follower count when everyone sees how she spoke to Laurence Fox in private and he screengrabbed it and cried.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

5 years

Football manager effortlessly summarises everything that is wrong with the media in the 21st century.

Tom Huelin

@TomHuelin1

5 years

How good is this from Klopp though?

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

6 months

Bad news, lads. Head Lesbians In Charge (HLIC) Jodie Foster, Megan Rapinoe and Kristin Stewart convened an emergency board meeting earlier and took a vote. THE LESBIANS ARE NOT APPEASED BY THE CLOTH FLAG.

Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

6 months

APPEASE THE LESBIANS

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

Everyone even tangentially involved with @weareladyparts .

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

Ref Sapir Berman officiating her first game since coming out as transgender and having her nails admired by Idan Vered. Pump this into my veins.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

5 years

I see there's a bloke on the ref team for tonight. How do we know he's qualified? Does he know the offside rule?

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

#KeepPoliticsOutOfFootball

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

6 years

This could be the gif of my life. #SEN

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

8 years

They can take our princesses, our kings & queens of music & arts, but they will pry our caustic wit from our cold dead hands.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

Laura. Jane. Grace.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

5 years

Cyril Sneer, innit?

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 years

Pick your next leader on the basis of how cool they look playing football.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

8 years

It's a new low.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

This is going to upset generations of rugby boys more than you could possibly imagine. I'm so here for it.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 years

Has a footballer ever shithoused their club side with the efficiency and elegance that Bale has shown Real Madrid?

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

1 year

Someone just liked this and brought it back to my attention so I’m re-upping because it’s so pure.

Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

Ref Sapir Berman officiating her first game since coming out as transgender and having her nails admired by Idan Vered. Pump this into my veins.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 years

iShowSpeed all over the internet in his Manchester United shirt. He seems like a fun lad until you google him.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 years

He's been filled with antifreeze and has his winter tyres on.

Erling Haaland

@ErlingHaaland

2 years

😤🥶

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 years

Women writing great songs and getting buried by the laddery of Britpop in the 90s still grieves me. Sleeper, Echobelly, Salad, Elastica, Lush, Skunk Anansie, Hole, Garbage etc. Controversially none of those women turned out to be massive sex pests either.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

1 year

I can never and will never cope with a ripped Fernando. This is where the world started to go wrong.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

5 years

I really love how much this is pissing the likes of Moir off.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

6 months

He continues:

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 years

I've been writing about toxic masculinity in sport for more years than I care to remember and if I've learned anything, it's that this image & statement will challenge more people to think about their views than anything I've ever said.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

2 years

You have to say that's world class.

The World Of Funny

@TheWorldOfFunny

2 years

Got ya! 🤣

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

8 years

When you go to the match with your father in law because your wife thinks you need to bond.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

4 years

Well that fucking happened.

Femi

@Femi_Sorry

4 years

What a delicious freudian slip from Republican communications director @MattsGorman . 😅 @adamboultonSKY

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

4 years

'A woman's larynx was left in tatters after some rich bloke in a suit throttled her'. FIXED IT. HT @harriet1marsden

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

3 years

With a huge apology for being a massive sex pest.

Learn Attraction

@LearnToAttract

3 years

You're shopping at your local wine store, and this young woman notices you checking her out. How do you open?

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

5 years

RE Mark Field story, I'm so over being told how I should react to things. I've been attacked in the street & my home, kicked in the crotch by a boy when I was 14, sexually harassed too many times to count & every SINGLE time told to lighten up or I'm too emotional. Fuck. Off.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles

1 year

Literally everyone watching this game who wasn't born in England asking wtf 'top bins' means.

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Kelly Welles

@kelly_welles