Jon Dryden Taylor @jondrytay Twitter profile

Last Seen Profiles

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@A22222222222213

@salmajed

Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

Very grateful at this point for the leaders of the opposition, Jack Monroe and Marcus Rashford.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

The end of a marriage is never easy, and all I would ask is that Sarah Vine be shown the same empathy and compassion as she has shown to the lives of others.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

It's a real thinker. What is it that usually attracts people to this part of the city, which for geographical purposes we'll call London's West End? It's on the tip of my tongue.

James Lewis

@JLewisland

4 years

It’s Covent Garden, London’s biggest tourist restaurant district, it’s 1pm, it’s Friday, tables outside, it’s sunny and warm... where is everyone?

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

Oscar Wilde on Twitter: ‘I can resist anything except temptation’ The replies: ‘Can’t resist much then can you?’ ‘Uh, seriously? Temptation is the main thing to resist!’ ‘I can resist anything except chocolate! And wine!’

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

In fairness, L*wrence F*x probably didn't notice the Pride traffic lights before because he hasn't had much call to be in the West End in the five years since they went up.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

6 years

WOOOAH, WE’RE HALFWAY THERE WOOOOOOAAAAHH

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

2 years

All the great sporting action, just as he would have wanted.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

7 years

Every year we laugh but secretly I want this scarf and so do all of you.

Alan White

@aljwhite

7 years

Happy Lenny Kravitz scarf day.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 months

@camruined NB Heidi never actually said this- it’s an old tumblr meme edited into her confessional look by the ‘incorrect drag race’ account. Still fun tho

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

9 months

@fesshole I think it's maybe a misstep to publish this one. Alzheimer's is really fucking brutally hideous to anyone it touches and the behavioural changes are the most upsetting part.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

Everyone involved in this show from casting through the whole of filming through the edit through making this trailer: ‘Should we check if that ‘88’ tattoo on his face means anything?’ ‘Nah, I’m sure it’s fine.’

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

I met Barry Cryer once, at a wedding I sang at, and in our two minute conversation he made me feel a thousand feet tall. Comedy has lost one of the very very best.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

FUUUUUCCCCK’S SAAAAAAAAKEEE

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

@duke_helena New gay uncles reporting for duty if you ever find yourself in London. Your family is global now.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

2 years

This is the core of it. They're all so annoyed at Lycett not because he made some comedic flight of fancy, but because he straight-facedly parroted the kind of line they happily accept from politicians, and let its absurdity speak for itself.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

So this should go straight into the audition speech book for a lot of actors I know.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

A year ago today I came up with the line ‘I formed a Placebo tribute band once but it all broke down at the first rehearsal’ which is a PROPER JOKE.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

1 month

@kieran_hurley Honestly the most English lyrics ever written

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

6 years

The best thing of many about this spectacularly bonkers tweet is that Davis was in the *territorial* SAS, so can presumably only ‘take people out’ on evenings and weekends.

Rt Hon Nadine Dorries

@NadineDorries

6 years

David Davis is ex SAS He’s trained to survive. He’s also trained to take people out. #Brexit

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

Calling *Margaret Atwood* a ‘handmaiden’, there.

Caroline Debenham 🍅 🏳️‍⚧️ reclaiming the 🦖

@CarolineDebenh1

4 years

@notCursedE And they actually have

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

5 years

When I was a kid my mum would make me give up my seat on public transport if an adult was standing. Now I’m an adult and parents always make sure their kids have a seat and what I’m saying is that I HAVE NEVER BEEN THE ONE THAT GETS TO SIT DOWN.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

9 months

@edballs @GMB This might be going better for you if the interview hadn’t been broadcast on television, where people can see what happened.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

Fun nerdy New Year game: who was 100 years older than you and what were they up to in 1921? I have Rachmaninov buying an apartment in Manhattan and Caruso dying.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

We’ve got to a point where large media organisations can routinely use the term ‘hard left’ to describe anything that isn’t actually sending kids up chimneys, and lots more people are to blame for that than think they are.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

To the boys holding hands at Kilburn Station: your makeup is fabulous but the ‘And what?’ deathstares you gave us were misplaced. Sometimes old people are gay too.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

5 years

DAMMIT LIZ WHAT DID I *JUST* SAY?

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

2 years

@lucytobin Weird that you got the same customer service rep as the woman from this two year old news story!

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

Just putting the bins out, which I believe is from The Game Of Thrones.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

@DPJHodges @OwenJones84 Asking how those of us facing £0 income for months are going to be helped is not ‘attack mode’ and it says everything about you that you describe it as such.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

Dear People Who Make Things Go Viral: they’re not advertising going back to work, they’re advertising Dettol and using workplace tropes to do so. Please incorporate this into your satire. Thank you.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

I just don’t get the logic of all these gotchas about feckless parents. Of *course* there are some terrible parents out there. ALL THE MORE REASON TO MAKE SURE THEIR FUCKING KIDS ARE OK YOU COMPLACENT CARTOONS

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

5 years

My dad worked at the BBC for years. I’ve done work for it too. I think it’s an incredible organisation and I’ve spent so much time defending it to people who don’t. I can’t bear what Rob Burley’s imperious, patronising arrogance is doing to its reputation.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

7 years

YOUR USERNAME IS LITERALLY GUIDO FAWKES

Guido Fawkes

@GuidoFawkes

7 years

Labour Students Call For Queen to Be Killed:

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

8 years

Brief moment to be grateful for living in the kind of country that would have a Chilcot Report in the first place.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

@darrengrimes_ @MarcusRashford If I had been deemed too stupid to know I was breaking the law, I probably wouldn't try and equate a football tournament with starving kids.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

@andrew_lilico Yes, in a truly free country you should be punished for criticising a politician. Can you hear yourself?

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

I don't care that we got 0 points. We voted for Lithuania and Iceland. I love us.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

One thing we’ve learned from this pandemic is that if A Quiet Place were real, there would be a load of people wandering around with speakers, insisting that Magna Carta gives them the right to blast their Gary Barlow albums.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

Actors! What was the last line you said in front of an audience? (Mine: 'Do you want the truth- or shall I make something up?')

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

I see cancel culture is killing comedy again, like it did in the 80s when it was called ‘PC’. Poor old comedy, constantly getting killed in new ways every time someone gets old.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

2 years

The response to the ‘theatre losing talent to Netflix’ thing is depressing for a lot of reasons. Firstly, as others have pointed out, big names and talent aren’t the same thing. But it’s mainly depressing because nobody is mentioning the economic reality. (1/5)

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

6 years

@cheapmansvest @OwenJones84 Nobody owes anyone a conversation, particularly not when that person is screaming abuse. It’s odd that you don’t know this.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

please i beg you read the tweet carefully before you reply

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

If you blame all this on football rather than the society it exists in, you're letting an awful lot of people off the hook.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

7 years

How will parents know what to put on their children in? Kids will be turning up to school in colanders and fire blankets.

Good Morning Britain

@GMB

7 years

John Lewis removing ‘boys’ and ‘girls’ labels is ‘political correctness gone completely and utterly insane’ - @piersmorgan . Do you agree?

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

AAAARGH WHY DOES NOBODY, LITERALLY NOBODY, IN OUR NATIONAL CONVERSATION KNOW WHAT PEOPLE ARE LIKE?

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

5 months

Only £600 a week LEFT OVER *laughs in theatre actor*

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

(cw: shouting) WE'RE NOT ASKING WHEN WE CAN OPEN WE CAN SEE YOU TRY TO PRETEND WE'RE ASKING THAT WE ARE NOT AS DUMB AS YOU SEEM TO THINK WE ARE WHAT WE ARE ASKING FOR IS MONEY ASK RISHI ABOUT EASYJET IF YOU WANT A BLUEPRINT, YOU KNOW, THAT OFFSHORE COMPANY THAT GOT 600m

Oliver Dowden

@OliverDowden

4 years

I saw v comprehensive safety measures in place at @LondonPalladium this morning with @OfficialALW & Public Health England Despite the huge challenges, we’re working intensively with them & others to get theatres open as soon as safe and I know that panto season is key

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

2 years

Me: I’ll just pour this carefully down the sink so as not to make any mess! Coffee grounds: haha lol nice try we are going everywhere you’ll find some of us on the fucking ceiling

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

2 years

@OldDasher @zarahsultana Please, don’t let us keep you from your busy daily schedule of tweeting about how there are people on Masterchef who aren’t white.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

Remember the clapping when this is over. And remember the cheering too: the cheering in the House in June 2017, when a proposal to remove the 1% cap on public sector pay rises was defeated. Key workers must never be treated with such contempt again.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

2 years

Today, the day after losing mum, I am getting on a train back to Leicester to rejoin the Billy Elliot company. I wanted to take a self-indulgent moment to say why I'm so grateful to be able to do so.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

5 years

The ‘playing a character’ thing about Lorraine Kelly is smoke-and-mirrors reporting. The key thing is that HMRC was trying to claim she’s an employee when she doesn’t get a pension or holiday pay. She’s self-employed so damn right her agent should be deductible.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

For those of you who want to know what it's like to be in the arts at the moment, here's a hypothetical situation to illustrate it. Imagine your industry is in existential crisis and the only person who can help is Nadine Dorries. Now imagine that's not a hypothetical.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

@Mattskilletguy @EllenCScott Hi! My marriage isn’t dependent on whether you ‘believe’ in it, fortunately. I’m definitely married.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

11 months

@watsoncomedian In my jokewriter days, I would often be a dummy panellist for panel show pilots or exec tryouts. So often we’d be told afterwards ‘god, I wish we could have YOU on when we go to series’ and I always used to think ‘you… could?’

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

6 years

@markedly That ATMs are a scam because you get £10 to spend BUT ALSO £10 is taken out of your account.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

6 years

Boris Johnson has been making horrendously racist comments, in public, for years. Don’t get it the wrong way round: he’s not racist because he had a meeting with Bannon, he had a meeting with Bannon because he’s racist.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

5 months

That not one but TWO big budget TV dramas have been made about an interview which didn't fundamentally change anything (obvious wrongun was kept out of the public eye a bit more, no further consequences) feels like TV marking its own homework with an A+

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

5 years

@dominiquetaegon I have to check my surroundings for safety whenever I want to hold my husband’s hand, but sure, go right ahead and compare that to supporting the party that has been in government for the last decade.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

1 year

@PeterKalve @hypotaxia17 @AyoCaesar What if all the church walls had collapsed outwards like in a Buster Keaton film and then everyone had custard-pied each other? Would you have cheered then?

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

2 years

@PNH_Hotelier @PotteryThrow @siobhni @KBJWhitstable @richmillerpots Thank god you took the trouble to let her know. Imagine if she'd had to struggle through life without knowing your opinion of her! Doesn't bear thinking about.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

7 years

I mean he literally isn't.

Piers Morgan

@piersmorgan

7 years

Is James Bond not a real man, then?

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

7 years

@rufusjones1 @hugorifkind 'You can't call me a Nazi because I don't want to annex Danzig' is pretty choice, too.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

@jackslad2000 You're right! I should have thought of that!

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

8 years

Hi, @andrealeadsom ! I see you want to stop me getting married because of a religion I don't follow. How does that work then?

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

Zoom Call.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

6 months

@benpartridge Later in the same interview Winstone, who has a house in Italy, speaks Italian to one of the waiting staff, and the interviewer transcribes it into a weird phonetic misspelling, as if to say 'he couldn't possibly have been saying it properly'

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

Just thinking about how Aldi planted themselves squarely in the ‘plucky underdog’ category when they’re literally ten times the size of M and S, and what it says about us that it largely worked.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

Tweeting out private texts in the knowledge that your fan base will go after the friend/former friend who sent them is just the most spectacularly cunty, childish and narcissistic thing to do.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

2 years

My brilliant, beautiful, gentle, incisive, kind and loving mother Ellen Dryden, actress, writer and director, died in the early hours of this morning, aged 83. Lucy and I are heartbroken, but also glad her suffering is over and so grateful and proud to be her children.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

The top note of China In Your Hand is flat every single time.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

Just a brief reminder that you can be really angry about customer service without feeling the need to make the totally powerless person at the other end of the call (on this occasion, me, 48) cry.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

If you're angry that Prince Charles got a testing kit ahead of more deserving people, wait till I tell you about all the palaces.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

Everyone is saying how upsetting/ devastating this picture is, and I totally get it. But it gives me hope. I know I’m not the one who has to balance the books, but it makes me think ‘Cool. We’ll do it like that if it gets us back there’

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

Watching the Friends reunion and struck by the way they barely remember stuff that they performed once and the rest of us have seen thirty times.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

@jackseale The more they do this, the more people realise.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

Was it a penalty or wasn't it? Well, one thing we know for sure is that the government is introducing legislation that will make it illegal for lifeboat crews to rescue asylum seekers from drowning.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

8 years

Of course Douglas Carswell is out of step with official UKIP policy, which states that tides are caused by gays.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

7 years

Because the NHS isn't going to sue itself?

Richard Branson

@richardbranson

7 years

No matter where I am, I wake up early – usually around 5am. Here’s why:

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

The answer to all the culture warriors asking 'why do we pay for it?', which they all know, is that £300k for four hours pulling in 7m on a Saturday night is a fucking steal.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

7 months

If your problem with The Traitors were that the faithfuls were just *too* astute and insightful, then may I recommend Australia Series 2, full of people who I am astonished remember to breathe.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

2 years

Announcing the closure of your show in the press on a Bank Holiday weekend without telling the cast who were rehearsing to do it for a year isn't just careless or incompetent, it's straight-up cruel. It's a feature, not a bug.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

The average Brit over 60 appears to believe that they grew up in Victorian times, fought in WW2, and bought their 8 quid houses because they didn't drink fancy coffee. (And everyone played on the street and there was no pizza). I WAS THERE WHEN YOU WERE 20 YOU WEIRD LIARS

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

2 years

Apart from anything- *anything*- else, I can't get my head round 'I think that kid taking an exam smells of weed. Call the ACTUAL POLICE'

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

5 years

Fortunately the hot brush was *not* switched on. There was a bottle of milk on the table though, which I was able to return safely to Siobhan's fridge before it turned. Not all heroes prevent fires.

Siobhán McSweeney

@siobhni

5 years

This is the face of someone who has just sent @jondrytay back to her flat to check if she has left her hot brush on and hasn’t burnt down the flat. The flushed look of someone delighted to be @BFI q&a #DerryGirls but also worried she has killed her neighbours Dont worry, I hadn’t

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

@RishiSunak @ITVNewsPolitics Nice. Just a couple of things. 1: We've all seen the video. 2: The money hasn't arrived yet. 3: Funding empty buildings doesn't actually help freelancers pay our rent.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

2 years

The clothes my family gave me for my birthday vs the ones I arrived in. I guess they know me pretty well.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

This has very strong 'dream sequence in a cancelled 90s US sitcom' energy.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

5 years

The word ‘English’ is not taboo for the BBC, Brussels or Westminster. Shakespeare is on every curriculum. Shaw was Irish. Mons is not pronounced like sons. The Union Jack represents the UK, not England. Why are these flagfuckers so pig-ignorant about the country they fetishise?

anna garrs

@certual

5 years

Saw this on Facebook and just thought I’d tweet it 😢

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

2 years

So I’m sorry if it’s hard to get name actors on stage because they’re all working with Shonda. But I’m also happy for them. They deserve to earn a living and for most of us in theatre it’s very, very hard to do that within the current payment structure. (5/5)

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

5 years

The media treatment of #EveLeigh and #TomPenn isn’t just about shoring up Johnson, of course. It’s a warning. It’s a demonstration of power. It’s saying ‘do you want this to happen to you?’ It’s chilling.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

2 years

These are people who bring up three weeks of bin strikes forty years ago every time left wing politics are discussed. They must not be allowed to forget all this. They must not receive the benefit of any doubt. Their weird, unearned ‘safe hands’ reputation is spectacularly over.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

1 year

‘Everyone should watch this film!’ ‘Uh, it’s a film by a self-proclaimed fascist and is full of easily-disproved misinformation’ ‘Well I didn’t know that and I didn’t like the fascist bits but I agreed with the other bits. Why are you so closed-minded lol’ 2023 is very tiring.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

4 years

The joke about ‘leaving early’ isn’t the gotcha you think it is because they are, I stress again, advertising Dettol.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

My adulthood has contained less French Onion Soup than my childhood led me to believe it would.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

2 years

I know dunking on Johnson is fun, but this also means we're definitely getting the guy whose big campaign boast was how he siphoned a load of money away from the poor.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

8 years

Love Productions: 'After extended negotiations we've decided to kill our franchise stone dead for the sake of some dollar' #GBBO

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

No station rocks the ‘your train leaves in four minutes but we’re not going to tell you which platform yet’ vibe like Euston.

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Jon Dryden Taylor

@jondrytay

3 years

Yeah, me too. Missed my mum’s last family Christmas before she had to go into residential care, while No 10 whooped it up. But there’s nowhere to put the anger. Barnard Castle, dodgy PPE contracts, Arcuri, second jobs… they just wait it out and the press move on. 145k dead.

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