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Human Hatstand

@johnnieego

4,225
Followers
3,703
Following
6,312
Media
48,480
Statuses

Marketing, Creativity, Loyalty, Mental Health & Hat. Never forgot about Dre. Exactly the RIGHT kind of idiot. Manbassador & Fractional CMO. ░B░l░N░S░I░N░B░I░O

London
Joined December 2008
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 months
I've had a couple of things get kicked down the road in the last week or so, so am available* now to take on new clients. * pimping myself across all channels
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
24 days
@davidmackau At least it’s not in Excel
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 months
@supertanskiii I bet he’s a fantastic pole vaulter.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
14 days
@Y2SHAF Hey, are you going to credit @heldutson for this tweet that you literally stole word for fucking word?
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
First day in the office at my new job 🤯 EVERYTHING IS AWESOME!
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
Hugely proud and delighted to share that I will be joining @LEGO_Group next week, my first client-side role at my absolute favourite brand and best client win in my agency career. Everything is very much awesome! #LEGOTeam #BehindTheBricks
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 years
Storytelling isn’t a strategy.
@agazdecki
Andrew Gazdecki
2 years
Storytelling is a powerful marketing strategy for startups to differentiate from competitors.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
1 month
@arghkid Former England Cricketer Gladstone Small had the nickname Pearl, because he was neck-less.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
5 years
@NeilDotObrien One person offers opinion, another person offers different opinion. It’s two people disagreeing on fucking Twitter, you don’t need to make it up, you incredulous melt.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
The absolute state of Nicholas Witchell. An underage girl was trafficked by a now convicted paedophile, and all he can come up with is how it might affect the Queen’s party. Fuck off.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
I wasn’t going to be here today. Today should have been my youngest brother’s birthday. He died five years ago. On this day last year, alone, without my kids for the first time after my wife left with them I decided I couldn’t live this day again.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
1 month
@NoContextBrits The theme tune to Roobarb
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
4 years
@thedalstonyears That’s outrageous, how dare you suggest such a blatantly horrific abuse of our heritage. What about Laura Whitmore instead of Davina? I’d go for that.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
1 year
One of the best quotes on marketing ever for me: "A lot of advertising is geared to persuasion rather than building mental availability. Persuasion is about assuming you're in the room and you're arguing your point, whereas mental availability is about getting into the room.”
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 years
Having taken time to decompress, I'm now ready to share some news. Sadly, my time at The LEGO Group has come to an end. It became clear, too late, that it wasn't the right role. Naively I dug myself in & lost myself for a while, but am grateful to be able to breathe again now.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 years
Citalopram. I’m on Citalopram. It’s an anti-depressant I was prescribed when I was at my lowest, waiting to get far enough past Christmas to not ruin it forever for my kids and then end it all. There’s no shame in meds. Let’s keep talking, being open. It’s ok to not be ok ❤️
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
10 months
Your LinkedIn feed be like
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 months
@PaulChuckle2 Pass the joint to me… to you…
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
6 months
When you have a Teams meeting at 1, but forgot to start trying to join at 12.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
Even by his own snivelling standards, Nicholas Witchell’s shitty nuanced report on two boys celebrating their dead mother is fucking vile.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
1 year
Smashing the patriarchy
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
Happy birthday Dave, I love you, miss you and wish you were here to see your son and my kids grow up. I wish you were here so I could watch you grow old, and take the piss out of your attempts to fight it off you vain beautiful bastard 💔💔💔
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
Humblebrag time, sorry not sorry. Someone reversed into my car yesterday, left a note with a number. I’d already damaged that panel, so texted them not to worry & thanks for the honesty. Got the loveliest message back from a relieved new mum. Happy Sunday ❤️
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 years
Don’t take stupid advice
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
4 years
I think you'd call that a distinctive asset. Brilliant.
@garethkthomas
Gareth K. Thomas ❤️‍🩹
4 years
Simplicity wins. Hovis Christmas ad. Via @rshotton .
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
6 months
Love this from Rick Rubin in The Creative Act: “Rules direct us to average behaviors. If we’re aiming to create works that are exceptional, most rules don’t apply. Average is nothing to aspire to. The goal is not to fit in.”
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 months
@YouGov Most of those deluded fools wouldn't even qualify for the Australian Breakdancing team.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
9 months
Oh Dall-e, you really have surpassed yourself this time. Wanted an image for a deck I'm putting together on loyalty to illustrate that brand loyalty is not monogamous and I couldn't be happier with this. Love it!
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
I love Bill Hicks, but anyone who thinks marketing is persuading people to buy things they don’t need is mistaken. Marketing is increasing the chance of people buying your thing when they’re minded to by from your category.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
Proud to have completed my Mini MBA in Marketing with @markritson today. Such a fantastic course, can’t wait to do the brand module next (and bore the shit out of everyone about it, sorry not sorry). @MWMiniMBA
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
10 months
Today would’ve been my brother’s 43rd birthday. I still miss him desperately, but at least this year I have the comfort of my kids. It was this day a year or 2 ago, alone, that I decided I couldn’t carry on. I’m grateful for the friends who wouldn’t let me go. Love you bro 💔
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
PSA: no matter how much experience you have, how good you are, how amazing a company you work for, how much you earn, we all have shit days. We all feel worthless from time to time. I’m in my dream job and having a nightmare. It happens. Thanks for the love (even you Balls) ❤️
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
1 month
@oldenoughtosay In England. We call them fried eggs.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 months
@CostaCoconuts Racist cunt flavour.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
1 month
@Parody_PM Fuck off back to where you came from said Fred.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 years
This is genius level genius
@rshotton
richard shotton
2 years
Smart way of getting people to value their library HT @Suzannepope
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
7 months
You can't do business without marketing. Founders & business leaders who think they don't need marketing don't understand what marketing is, and how much of it they are doing already. This might piss some people off, but marketing isn't a role, it's a core business function.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
11 months
Client-side marketing chums, I'm working on a short series based around what clients wish their agencies better understood. I have a few starters from my own time on the other side, but what things would you want your agencies to have more knowledge of please?
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 years
@SoVeryBritish Frankie Goes To Hollyrood
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 years
The real reason for my trip down memory lane, visiting my brother’s memorial bench at the Actor’s Church in Covent Garden. Miss him every day, and could really do with his beautiful daftness right now 💔💔
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 years
@_TommyMason A Dove soap bar
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
I’ve got nothing of interest to say. A thread.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
4 years
This is just fucking EPIC. Sound on.
@RexChapman
Rex Chapman🏇🏼
4 years
Metal Kenneth Copeland. The internet is undefeated...
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
Your regular reminder: tactics aren't strategy.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
4 years
@fer_machado123 Anybody familiar with your work knew the next line would be about empowering women, but using such a triggering line to catch attention is abhorrent. Poor judgement this time I think, which is a shame as there is a great initiative behind it.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
Please, please, please, I implore you not to value lessons from people like this who don’t even know what they don’t know. You might not need a degree, but you will benefit from a marketing education and will see through this kind of “it worked for me” 🐴 💩
@heykahn
Zain Kahn
3 years
I went from zero to leading marketing teams in 5 years. But I never studied marketing in college. Those 5 years I spent 1,000+ hours studying 100s of books and resources. I've distilled everything I learned in those 5 years into 7 simple frameworks. Here they are ― for free:
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
25 days
@anon_opin As far away from single use as any plastic will ever be, though.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
Latest blood test shows my blood sugar level is down from the abnormally high that led to my diabetes diagnosis 9 months ago to now being just 1 point above the normal range. The lifestyle changes are working then ✊
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 months
@BBCNews It's alright, I've fixed it.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
Feeling positive, and making positive changes. Signed up for both adult swimming lessons and @markritson ’s miniMBA this week. Cheers!
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
Ah, Murray, what can I say? The world’s a dumber, less funky, less generous place without you. Drinking the Macallan he knew so well, listening to the @ScotStratGuy mix on @IsolatedTalks radio. #Sunday7Social fam may recognise the bins in the background. #CheersCaptain 🥃
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
Too many of you to mention, but you know who you are and thank you. But still I “knew” there was only one way to stop the pain. But one special person wouldn’t let me take the easy route out. I owe today to @gemmyred . I love you mate ❤️❤️❤️
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
10 months
@anon_opin Yeah, but your rice isn't as fluffy as mine.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 months
@JVMonte2 Tainted Love
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
And so today I’m able to think fondly of my beautiful little brother without falling apart. I have my children with me today, and they’ll be staying over as they now often do. I have a dream job. It’s not been easy, but I’m glad Gem dragged me back from the brink.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
@HelloKrystalWu Never forget that you are not the consumer, even if you 'get high on your own supply', your take is skewed. And consumers will never care as much as you do or as much as you assume they do. Make the most of the attention they do decide to give you.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 years
First week of the new gig done. Cheers everyone 🍻
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 years
Some personal news. For those that don't already know, I am delighted to have joined the brilliant team (as well as @Giles_Edwards ) at @Gasp_4 in a new role of Business Director. This follows their successful hiring of Hat as Head of Headwear. It's good to be reunited.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
First adult swimming lesson done. Managed 3 metres unaided. Well chuffed with that, I thought I’d be in water wings fir at least a month.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
1 year
@markpollard Being caught in a cycle of politics, finding everything you used to think was a priority is at best a nice to have, moving farther from the creative process and working to bizarre KPIs based on an unconnected team’s bonus package.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 years
Happy Father’s Day to me. For the first time since my youngest was born and my estranged wife left with them during what was certainly a traumatic lockdown one, I was able to wake up with both my kids in my own home and spend the whole day with them. Sweet dreams are made of this
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
23 days
@toryboypierce Why is this pointless prick even in my feed?
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 years
When I was diagnosed diabetic my blood sugar level was dangerously high, double what it should be. My 6 month blood test showed if got it down to a few points above normal. My last test has it back normal. Meds play a part, but so do the lifestyle changes I’ve made. Go me.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 years
One thing that’s helped me deal with the ups & downs of life - wins & the losses, joy & pain - is accepting that vulnerability is not weakness. Here’s me opening up to @markpollard on @sweathead . Warning: it gets dark, but there is light. I’m still here ❤️
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
Homework night #miniMBA
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
10 months
Ah poop, it’s the “personal news” I never wanted to have to share. The shitheap current economic situation has lead to my role at …Gasp! being made redundant. A tough decision, but the only and smart one for right now. No regrets, it was a wonderful time. Next steps…?
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
10 months
Works Christmas party when you’ve just been made redundant. Don’t think I’m going to pull. Just me and the #AdventuresOfHat
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 years
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
1 year
I love the smell of a confirmed new client win in the morning.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
To you, Murray. Sláinte ❤️
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
Work kit has arrived!
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
Marketing Twitter this weekend
@ShetlandRyan2
Cllr Ryan Thomson
3 years
This pepper has seen some shit.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
Yeah, I accepted your LinkedIn invite. I swear, if you hit me with an instant cold sales pitch I will hunt you down. You know who you are.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
The first rule of marketing: you are not the consumer. I'm all for leftfield creative/tactics, but this is a spectacularly bad take. Do things that your audience will think are funny or awesome even if people who are not your audience - you, your agency - think it won't work.
@brian_armstrong
Brian Armstrong
3 years
11/ I'm still new to marketing, but “Do things that you think are funny or awesome even if people tell you it won’t work” seems like reasonable advice so far.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 years
How it started vs how it’s going
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
5 years
Casual racism, celebrities having to “come out”, and a never-ending Tory government. Oh.
@kthompsonbbn
Kelly Thompson
5 years
Without revealing your age, what's something you remember from your youth that today's youth wouldn't understand ?
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 years
Online retailers should be made by law to declare who they use to deliver goods. There is no fucking way I’d have paid for express delivery had I known the Christmas present for my son would be sent by fucking #Evri
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
So today is 2/2/22 or, if you're American, 2/2/22.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 years
🎶Wherever I Lay My Hat (That’s My Home🎶
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
Might have also gone overboard on the staff sale 👀
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 years
I’m old enough to have worked in digital before social media and cookies. When you had to craft a campaign like any other medium and not just rely on algorithms and shitty intrusions.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
1 year
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 years
Seven years ago today my world changed forever. Happy birthday beautiful boy ❤️❤️❤️
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
1 year
Screw your KPIs, THIS is a what marketing success looks like @tescomobile @MADFESTLONDON
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 years
A drop of The Macallan, bought this time last year in memory of the beautiful human. Thinking of you, the music and your family big guy ♥️ @ScotStratGuy #CheersCaptain
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
1 year
Finally, what I’ve worked so hard for all my career. I can’t tell you how happy I am right now! Can. Lyons. The first of many.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 years
Hey BBC, the extraordinary thing is not that he’s 80 years old, it’s that he is Paul fucking McCartney. Untouchable legend.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
@Dr_Draper Marketing is letting as many people as possible know you are up for a shag. Branding is how they remember you were a good lay. Buy my book: How Erections Grow.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
4 years
@claremackint0sh This is wonderful. I lost my youngest brother 4 years ago, it took me a couple of years to feel in control of anything. Tomorrow would have been his 40th birthday, I still take his birthdays off work but I can now say his name without breaking. 💔
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
10 months
Best thing about not working right now? Getting to hang out with this one ❤️
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
4 years
Five effing minutes without a Zoom call.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
Ok, let's get meta (as opposed to Meta) on this. Posting my reply to a LinkedIn post of a screengrab from Twitter as a screengrab back on Twitter. TACTICS ARE NOT STRATEGY GAAAAAAAAAHHHH
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
12 days
@bbclaurak Get off air seems apt.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 years
Superhero day at work, presenting Mr LEGO! Context: when my old agency worked with LEGO, my client invited Stan to the office. Stan always called him Mr LEGO. When I joined it was replacing my old client, so I became Mr LEGO.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 years
No, YOU’RE sat on the tube trying and failing to conceal the cape you’re wearing. By day, man with Hat, by night… #AdventuresOfHat
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
Some 'personal news' as they say. Today's my last day at @ndlgroup as I take a step in a slightly different but hugely exciting direction. More on that later, for now I want to publicly thank the whole team for being amazing, lovely, supportive & letting me fly. Thank you ❤️
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
4 years
There’s little more insidious than the undeserving poor narrative. I grew up poor. My petty criminal dad once robbed a sports shop so his kids could dress like their friends and feel normal. I didn’t know at the time, but remember feeling a 1000 feet tall for once.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
6 years
@GaryLineker LEEEAVE IT GAREE EE AINT WERF IT! (He really ain’t)
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
Michael Vaughan talking about times moving on, and what is unacceptable now wasn’t back in the day. No mate. It’s always been unacceptable. It’s just you didn’t care enough to understand that until it came back and affected you personally.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 years
First run of week 9, an unbroken 30 minutes, shaved 60 seconds off each k and the longest distance in my entire bloody life. Almost there. Apologies for the sweat Hat, I’ll make it up to you #AdventuresOfHat
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
2 months
@anon_opin Scrappy Doo is Tommy Robinson. He can fuck right off.
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@johnnieego
Human Hatstand
3 years
For fuck sake, if there is one industry where the value of broad input should be understood and celebrated it should be marketing. You are not your fucking audience. Research and diversity within research matter.
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