Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸 @Shredded_teat Twitter profile

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

3 months

took this photo so everyone knows i biked to the aurora

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

5 months

@barrettjoneill you opened my eyes, thank you 🙏

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

1 month

why did no one tell me about the gluten free bakery lady in cambridge who investigates every review to see if it's from a cyclist

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

4 months

make no mistake: the anti-car professional bike lobbyists are behind this. hard-working patriots will not bow down to their demands. we WILL drive on the collapsed bridge

MolotovFlicker Ignoring Your Questions Since 1902®

@MolotovFlicker

4 months

People are unhappy with the barricade first responders have set up to prevent them from driving toward a collapsed bridge.

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

1 month

@weather_forkast the bean was closed and now it's open

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

5 months

@_LVBLV no

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

10 months

in montreal, this is what happens to your car when you try to drive it on a pedestrianized street

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

5 months

*guy who just bought a SUV that is 90% blind spots* i just feel like the city is trying to make driving harder on purpose

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

1 year

@punished_cait i think we all know

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

2 years

triggering men in SUVs by simply biking in the cold

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

3 months

jewel will never fall

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

1 year

so i was the cyclist. the explanation here is that i was holding a 4000 lb jersey barrier in one arm on my way to install a DIY traffic diversion on berwyn, this person tried to pass and scraped the jersey barrier

Alien Doja 🛸👽🌬

@Aliendojadoll

1 year

Damage to my car caused by a Cyclist 🚴‍♀️ But I can’t claim against them. Sign and share my petition to make a change for us car drivers who contribute so much to the roads. Thank you #london #cardrivers #cyclist @MayorofLondon

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

1 year

free website

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

7 months

@BenRTrader @YourAnonOne personally i probably wouldn't say that at this time

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

9 months

lol

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

3 months

old town NIMBYs tonight:

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

19 days

need a job where i can bike around all day but not a bike messenger job. more like a job with no tasks

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

1 year

all these drivers slowed me down and made me miss a green light. it's time to ban cars from bryn mawr between broadway and clark. the road is too narrow for them.

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

2 months

i love to ask people from the suburbs of boston who complain about bike lanes who they voted for because they can't legally vote in boston and have no say over bike lanes

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

1 month

yeah i went back two years. i had to. because no one told me about this two years ago.

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

1 year

the "ableism!" responses imply: 1) all disabled people drive 2) disabled people cannot enjoy open streets or outdoor dining 3) the ideal world for a disabled person is one where they have to waste time in traffic and finding parking because every able-bodied person drives too

Kim Moscaritolo

@kimmosc

1 year

The last few years really have radicalized me against car culture. Seeing what this city could be with open streets, outdoor dining, and little to no car traffic, it makes me so mad that we apparently learned nothing and we're just gonna go back to the way things were.

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

1 month

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

3 months

@focusfronting isn't this the same guy who posted about buying a gun to defend his local best buy from looting during the 2020 protests

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

1 month

is it just me or does this look extremely cool

WBBM Newsradio

@WBBMNewsradio

1 month

Chicago’s famous Buckingham Fountain will be closed until further notice after and act of vandalism turned the fountain's waters bright red. Photos provided to WBBM by @hinklecolin of Soaring Badger Productions.

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

11 months

a driver of a minivan drove into the side of the school bus and killed a kid. that's what happened.

ABC News

@ABC

11 months

One student was ejected and killed and 23 other children were hurt when a school bus overturned on the first day of school in Ohio, officials say.

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

2 years

Cyclist killed on Milwaukee by driver, driver stays in car and does nothing, is permitted to leave the scene after cpd shows up to park in a bike lane and declare no crime was committed because "no one saw it" (not even the driver?) Do I have that right? If so

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

9 days

lol

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

3 months

@Solidarity_Star @JohnLukeWalker when you definitely have modern day accomplishments

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

2 years

it's so annoying that all these drivers choose to go on their joy rides right at 5pm when most hard-working people have to cycle, walk, or transit home from work at that time. like can't you sit in your wheelie couch some other time?? or go to a parking lot with the other cars??

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

2 months

folks it brings me no joy to announce that there has been an incident on the dickens greenway, directly caused by the bike path. strap in folks because only donna can walk us through this tragic event. today, there was a flood. (cont.)

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

11 months

"cyclists should stop at stop signs" ok bestie ❤️

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

8 months

was in DC for work earlier this week, heard a commotion from my hotel room and it turned out to be the best possible thing

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

11 months

@erinthornemusic why does libs of tiktok hate freedom?

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

7 months

chicago urbanists win every twitter poll because we are always waiting for the bus. we have the time

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

1 month

@retvrntables there are many like this and she accuses them of not being real customers

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

6 months

these people want a civil war because they live in a suburb and the only exciting things that happen in their lives are marvel movies

Michelle

@LoneStarLeft

6 months

Republicans want to murder you.

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

2 years

Everyone who biked today is so sexy and everyone who usually bikes but didn't is also very sexy

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

4 months

listen @ChicagoDOT we like the rocks. we want the rocks. who can i talk to about getting some rocks

Michael McLean

@cornoisseur

4 months

This week I received intel that CDOT is evaluating street treatments like this. Keep up the advocacy. Urban rocks are the fastest way to make an intersection safe.

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

1 year

what the hell is this guy doing

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

11 months

i'm on r/chicago telling suburbanites it will be completely fine to drive to streeterville tonight

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

2 months

@ZeusODea @isaiah_bb @ChristoSilvia have you considered that the "real world" is another term for the status quo and that it could be changed if enough people had the will

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

6 months

people will be like "oh yeah? but what if you decided to buy a bunch of stuff you don't need" when i say i get by fine with just my bike

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

4 months

Fellow Landlords, what is the appropriate amount to lower your tenants' rent by now that BCH failed to pass? Is 100/month enough?

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

25 days

@TheChrisGentry_ ticket for...what?

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

1 year

you are not allowed to care about a place you choose to move to. you are only allowed to care about the places your parents moved you to without your choosing, before you knew what choices were available

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

9 months

i would probably have severe depression if i bought a 20k pickup truck and got tailgated by a chick listening to taylor swift on a 600 dollar bicycle for 3 miles

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

2 years

drivers act like stopping and slowing are so hard in a car ignoring that they just have to tap a pedal with their foot. how the fuck can we possibly make this easier for you

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

1 year

can't wait for all these people to leave Chicago so i can buy a condo

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

1 year

can we get some love for these kings who did not block the bike lane to make their delivery?

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

7 months

why are people hating on this person for saying they want somewhere indoor for their kids to hang out. that's like, an extremely reasonable thing. some of you are weird

Molly

@mollyfleck

7 months

I am once again begging the city to open indoor playgrounds at public libraries. My child needs somewhere to burn off energy without getting frostbite, and all the private indoor trampoline parks and such are SO expensive.

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

7 months

@kenmartinboston @MayorWu @jfh whenever i see a bike lane, i panic and drive my car into another car

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

6 months

PUNXSUTAWNEY PHIL HAS CALLED FOR A CEASEFIRE AND AN IMMEDIATE END TO THE ISRAELI OCCUPATION

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

6 months

Growing up in the city, we were forced to believe the ability to bike was our biggest freedom in life. I’m glad I later realized that the truest freedom is $6900 in car payments, $4200 in car insurance, $50000 in gas, $4000 in parking and the ability to go beep beep

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

1 year

@JaymalGreen do you think that when i get hit by a car, my bike is the most of my worries? this is gonna blow your mind but children are dying on the streets because cars hit them.

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

7 months

left: city on the verge of collapse due to wokeness right: vibrant city center

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

2 months

bullying works, folks. keep it up

Mayor Brandon Johnson

@ChicagosMayor

2 months

Rain, sleet, or snow, we bike in Chicago! Happy Bike to Work Week!

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

2 years

we think of boomers as the chief climate change deniers but I think history will remember millennials more harshly - we had the data and still chose lifestyles that are incompatible with the reality of climate change

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

2 years

"ride as far to the right as possible" is among the worst possible advice to give to a cyclist. this is pretty much how i have been hit every time. right hooks, dooring, and people trying to park on my body. drivers don't look to their right.

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

2 months

we conclude this tale with a quote by donna herself: "We are obviously incapable of thinking things through. It appears we no longer have the intellect[...]." the end. check your storm grates babes, in case a bike lane near you has decided to maliciously clog them

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

2 years

needed to buy a TV which obviously requires a car so i bought a dodge charger which needs to be parked somewhere until i buy my next TV. anyways what can we do about the lack of available street parking? can we ban bikes?

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

25 days

@TheChrisGentry_ TIL another way i break the law every day

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

11 months

"it's okay to park in a bike lane because traffic is dangerous" is baffling at first but it's honestly a pretty honest statement from these people. they do not see cyclists as people.

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

1 year

(not my photo) nazis in edgewater

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

10 months

which cyclist did this

Robert Loerzel

@robertloerzel

10 months

Traffic light at Clark and Montrose … it’s still working!

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

5 months

lady gets wrecked in the comments, more at 10

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

3 months

@focusfronting

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

2 years

@mollyfleck I wonder what specific mode of transportation is causing cycling to be unsafe for children in this city?

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

1 year

@RightWingCope the most common universal experience: living on a deserted road that is also a popular destination for groups of escaped convicts

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

1 year

imagine if a cyclist, ever, for any reason, suggested physically harming a driver for the act of driving

John J. Bauters

@JohnBauters

1 year

At a business mixer tonight an attendee heard I had biked to the event and said “I hate bicyclists so much. I would absolutely run you over and kill you if we left here at the same time. You don’t belong on the road.” Two hours later and I’m still processing all of it.

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

1 month

neighbors react to the loss of a community member, the mcdonalds sign in lincoln square

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

6 months

quick i need a man who has never rode a bike before to tell me that my bike commute isn't practical

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

7 months

baby plow doo dooooo doo doo doo

Alderman Matt Martin

@AldMattMartin

7 months

Thank you to CDOT and their bike lane-sized snow plows for promptly clearing our new Clark St protected bike lanes!! ❄️🚲

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

6 months

this is the perfect city car. it takes up a ton of space on the side of the road and the owner never, ever drives it. goals, honestly

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@Shredded_teat

1 year

i have this fantasy where i get doored but I am biking so powerfully that i tear the door clean off and keep riding unharmed

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

1 year

this is what i think of when suburban people claim i am financially privileged to live in chicago rent, my biggest expense, is less than half of what these people pay for a car. a thing you don't need here

Jessica Ray

@jessicaray0

2 years

Does this dealership realize this makes them all look really bad????

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

2 years

Clark st. They said they won't stop using the bike lane. This is after at least 7 cars parked in the bike lane.

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

8 months

no. you are not allowed to live here if you don't bike. they'll make you into malort

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

9 months

@TheWapplehouse vaxxed?

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

1 year

just wanted to let my ~haters~ know that i once again made an extravagant grocery purchase without a car

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

1 year

@JaymalGreen how will allowing speeding near school zones make those neighborhoods safer, Ja'mal?

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

10 months

everyone already dunked on this guy but no one is talking about the rare, perfect stop performed by the car after him

Alan Henney

@alanhenney

10 months

That's me driving the white Crown Vic on Blagden Ave at Allison St NW. DC has fined me $200. Should I pay or contest it?

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

1 year

just bought $285 of groceries without a car AMA

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

5 months

how is every single person riding a bike the most attractive person alive? has anyone studied this

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@Shredded_teat

2 months

our hero, the original hero who called 311, decides to be the first person to actually go outside and check the storm grate. it was the storm grate.

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

3 months

@edenxmm i was there at this time and saw people with dogs coming and going freely. they are in my photos.

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@Shredded_teat

1 year

ban cars if 28 people like this comment, robust public input will have been gathered and we can move forward with this policy proposal

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@Shredded_teat

4 months

as a driving hobbyist, i don't think we need to do any more road repairs. i drive every day and don't have any problems. road work is a waste of taxpayer money that causes congestion

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@Shredded_teat

11 months

is there a city with a more obsessive regional bike twitter than chicago

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Lakeshore Drive Creature 🇵🇸

@Shredded_teat

2 years

call me a radical woke leftist but I don't think people should have to face daily harassment, threats, and intimidation with a deadly weapon just for cycling to their destination

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@Shredded_teat

8 months

fellow millionaires, is this a good commuter bike?

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@Shredded_teat

1 year

thank god i'm autistic

Archy✝️🇹🇷 | Richard Nixon Democrat 🥥🌴

@ArchysLife

1 year

Thank God I'm Turkish

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@Shredded_teat

11 months

chicago politicians right now

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@Shredded_teat

2 years

me: i like to bike you (an intellectual): my grandma can't bike me: shit. fuck. you got me there. throwing my bike in the trash immediately. i can't enjoy this activity anymore

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@Shredded_teat

9 months

idk i read the article as pro bike because every driver in it sounds like a whiny bitchbaby and that seems purposeful

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@Shredded_teat

2 years

love seeing SUV dads at the school drop-off getting jealous when, unlike them, I am not completely blocked in by the other 1000 SUVs at the school drop-off. 'scuze me folks, reasonable-sized vehicle coming through 😁

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@Shredded_teat

2 months

brandon johnson to the smoldering remains of his support

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@Shredded_teat

2 years

day 1 of stopping at every stop sign, putting my foot down, and counting to 3 out loud. drivers love it!

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@Shredded_teat

6 months

this is my favorite made up law

Swivelhips

@DeadmansPlayboy

6 months

@Shredded_teat You have an obligation to get to the side of the road, except when unreasonable, in order to get out of the way of faster traffic.

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@Shredded_teat

2 years

just joined the cyclists who ride with 360 cameras club. 7+ years of daily riding and never felt the need but here we are

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@Shredded_teat

2 years

true story: i actually can't drive because of my medication, which apparently means society can no longer invest in car infrastructure, since driving is not accessible to every single person.

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@Shredded_teat

1 year

what, you can park here but i can't??? (driver tantrum part 1)

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