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@MurderHats

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551
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738
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Yes, really.

Portland, OR
Joined April 2013
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
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@MurderHats
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3 years
Galadriel: This is Nenya, the Ring of Adamant. And I am its keeper. Frodo: what’s Nenya do? Galadriel: Nenya business
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@MurderHats
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3 years
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@MurderHats
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2 months
@laserboat999 Great set decor everywhere
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@MurderHats
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5 years
@DailyMirror All of these people look exactly like I’d imagine.
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@MurderHats
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5 years
Everyone waiting for Cersei to die at the hands of the valonqar: David Benioff, D. B. Weiss: lmao what the fuck is a prophecy Everyone:
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@MurderHats
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6 years
@hellenkeniford True to form, Millennials are practically giving their money away! Tune in at 11 to hear about how you too can bleed them dry by holding basic needs over their heads!
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@MurderHats
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3 years
@Maladroithe “They didn’t want to net it because if they missed it would remember”
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@MurderHats
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4 months
@twinprincessltd I don’t think Rosa Parks would wear this.
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@MurderHats
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5 years
@kittynouveau ANIMAL CROSSING REMINDS ME OF MY TOXIC EX WHO
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@MurderHats
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2 years
the boys recording @LPontheleft
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@MurderHats
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5 years
@qgotnorings Idk it was really cool getting out of class and seeing all the things I couldn’t have and asked repeatedly why I wasn’t getting anything.
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@MurderHats
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5 years
@FOX10Phoenix Turn her into renewable energy
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@MurderHats
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22 days
@CarrieCnh12 “Chose a closed door hearing.” The translation isn’t great. The public was sent out of the room not the relevant court parties and employees. It wasn’t literally just her in the room with the defendants.
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@MurderHats
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3 years
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@MurderHats
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1 month
@TheMedicalTalk english gonna be putting this on toast
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@MurderHats
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17 days
@owenbroadcast Darger mentioned
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@MurderHats
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1 month
@lllliatttt only a $90 tummy ache 😮‍💨
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@MurderHats
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3 months
@megannn_lynne highly recommend divorce in your 20s
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@MurderHats
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4 years
@tschu_22 The stock market is working as intended. The intent is to exploit for personal gain.
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@MurderHats
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3 years
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@MurderHats
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4 years
@basedDiogeneet @Eugene_V_Dabbs I’m gonna let you think about why this might be a dumb thing to say.
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@MurderHats
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@MurderHats
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2 years
@DktrStrangelove @AubryAndrews Imagining someone trying to hinder your bathroom time
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@MurderHats
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2 years
@professorswag21 @ampol_moment Neil Breen would never
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@MurderHats
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4 years
@YahooNews Just give her the money. She’s done more to earn it than any CEO.
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@MurderHats
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3 years
@summerstoli casually vomiting and crying whenever Charlotte and I share a room. telling her i admire her work in between heaves.
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@MurderHats
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3 months
@melilbi I’ve enough hate in my heart for both
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@MurderHats
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1 year
@protestantwind Herman “Post-nut Clarity” Melville
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@MurderHats
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2 years
@dcbobasa No one’s addressing the real problem. The subtitles say “Nightwig.”
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@MurderHats
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4 years
@vanillatary @koaleszenz you can just say Chrissy Teigen doesn’t have an ass it isn’t illegal
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@MurderHats
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@WowCrazySale loving the blurred floating watermark of presumably some other company
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@MurderHats
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16 days
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@MurderHats
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4 years
@nypost The company execs also appear to have an additional hole in their head.
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@MurderHats
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5 years
@TestosteroneCiv 100% here for an androgynous future. Might finally get some clothes that fit right.
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@MurderHats
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@MurderHats
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4 months
@thisone0verhere The American equivalent is “I’m here” and doesn’t exclude the possibility of crying.
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@MurderHats
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5 years
@MustacheDad Life stops coming at you fast
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@MurderHats
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6 years
Ultimate Cuck? Man’s Wife Murdered By Another Man
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@MurderHats
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4 years
@KTLA @robdelaney All Creatures Against Bastards
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@MurderHats
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@MurderHats
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5 years
@globaltimesnews Bin Laden did nothing wrong
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@MurderHats
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@41Strange People really fucked up naming the leopard shark and the zebra shark.
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@MurderHats
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5 years
@nytimes Should’ve died with Hugh
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@MurderHats
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4 months
@isaiah_bb You don’t have to stop. It will continue to be funny.
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@MurderHats
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5 years
@GrayscaleInvest I thought this was an ironic meme jfc
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@MurderHats
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5 years
@BillCorbett never forgetti
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@MurderHats
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2 months
@youwouldntpost always counting down until the insurance will let them do it again
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@MurderHats
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1 year
@ashertwilde @swolecialism His podcast is pretty good
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@MurderHats
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3 years
@mattxiv why does this remind me of the flintstones
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@MurderHats
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3 months
@flaviusvalens1 if I know anything it’s that people love to give copious amounts of drug for free.
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@MurderHats
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1 year
@flieldy maybe you should’ve loved your grandparents more and got them an ed hardy headstone
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@MurderHats
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@MurderHats
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@ihaverhisen gonna sit here and act like mr clean ain’t got something going on
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@MurderHats
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4 months
@badg_er @realgirl_fieri I always interpreted it as backpedal *because* it does nothing. It’s too late. You already said it.
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@MurderHats
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5 years
@GlenWoodfin @justinamash It’s true, you are a nobody.
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@MurderHats
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2 years
@NickTerrysTho @KarenKilgariff It’s her fiancé, the 12ft Home Depot skeleton
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@MurderHats
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2 years
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@MurderHats
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5 years
@BrandyLJensen Where tf y’all finding these prices? They’re all a very normal $900+ from now through Dec when I google it
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@MurderHats
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3 years
@Oregonian Did anyone check to see if she really dodged a bullet?
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@MurderHats
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@MurderHats
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5 years
@AliceAvizandum you wear a ballgag and I wear a quadruple bbblllppppffb we are not the same
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@MurderHats
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4 years
@MarlaBeard @boschbot I’ve good news about Bosch’s Butt Beats
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@MurderHats
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28 days
@premiles_ I read and enjoyed Alice in Wonderland once then my mom decided that was my entire personality.
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@MurderHats
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4 years
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@MurderHats
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@BunnyJugs I was distressed about how he would make it back home
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@MurderHats
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1 month
“i’ll bet you wish you had straight hair! ☺️”
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@MurderHats
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3 years
@boschbot Tap pic to see the 𝙩𝙝𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙩
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@MurderHats
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4 years
@nytimes In the COVID economy? It’s been decades since anyone in the working class could truly afford a kid.
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@MurderHats
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3 months
@immlawACHall they should just check the “one of the good ones” box
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@MurderHats
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10 days
@SkeletonsinVGs glad they gave him a bench
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@MurderHats
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5 years
@FriskyWookie They literally had a flashback to Cersei visiting Maggy and it was mentioned several other times in the show
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@MurderHats
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14 days
@anymnesis you’re unforgettable 💅
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@MurderHats
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2 years
@IGN “JK Rowling is not helping in the development of Hogwarts Legacy, but she is still going to earn royalties from it. Rowling owns the IP to the Harry Potter universe, so any game, movie, or book based on the universe will be profitable for her.”
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@MurderHats
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5 years
@Jezebel Dessen reacts to someone saying her books are for teenage girls by acting like a teenage girl.
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1 month
@lopez_updates Matt just needs to know it’s not his fault and that she and Ben still love him very much
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@MurderHats
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5 years
@tictoc ‘Corporations Adjust Their Marketing in an Effort to Remain Profitable’
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3 months
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@yassifiedsloth
yassified sloth from ice age
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Use this tweet as an excuse to post an old pic where you looked hot
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@MurderHats
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2 years
@willystaley @AlbyEarley We had to put security boxes on whoopee cushions when I worked at Walgreens because kids and adults alike would just poke holes in them
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@MurderHats
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23 days
@DailySnoopys I’ve never pressed “show more” so hard in my life
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@MurderHats
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2 years
@myrrlyn @bigkittenqueen @detachment_red I didn’t think “milves” would upset me so much but here I am. Need to correct.
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@MurderHats
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3 years
@mondomascots oh my god
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@Westhoefen accept you will never get it back while still being mad about it
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@MurderHats
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3 years
@killing_my_ass_ fuckin’ cooked your ass
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@MurderHats
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4 months
@evelynwebsite @cia__asset I thought Patches was the implication that *something* was down there
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@MurderHats
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3 months
@CantEverDie for the longest time whenever someone talked about 30 Rock I thought they were saying Third Rock and had no idea why everyone was suddenly getting into it.
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16 days
💅
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@MurderHats
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3 years
@boschbot hate it when this happens
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@MurderHats
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2 months
@MurderHats
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if i were macron i would simply not attempt a coup in the country that birthed the guillotine
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@MurderHats
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2 years
@ireneilys is that a giant pink lima bean
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@MurderHats
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5 years
@LLW902 You’re living the dream
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@MurderHats
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2 years
@memesiwish Booker T. Watchington
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@MurderHats
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2 years
@OAsunde @nytimes It’s abuse of power and falls under coercion
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@MurderHats
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1 month
the North Star:
@eluamuno
haternextdoor
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@Gresham2x The Saints will reveal their true selves soon
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