Isai @IsaiBCortez Twitter profile

Last Seen Profiles

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@Lonrot

Isai

@IsaiBCortez

3 months

@stephmui Don’t tell them and it’ll be like one of those funny TikToks where they all wear the same flannel 🙄

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

22 years sober today 🤘🏽

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

3 months

If you got PPP loans that were forgiven or unemployment non taxable benefits and hate student loan forgiveness I think you’re a dummy and a hypocrite. If you didn’t get PPP loans that were forgiven or free unemployment non taxable benefits and hate student loan forgiveness I

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

Never had a dad, but now I get to do the dad things I wished I got to do ❤️🙏🏽

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

3 months

My moms cancer just came back again it’s the 4th freaking time! Damn it!

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

26 days

That time I got married

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

My daughter didn’t think this comparison was funny

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

😍

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

@Frediculous I went to a bachelor party with 6 black bros and 1 Jewish bro. Around the 3rd day the Jewish bro started talking like the black bros and they checked him. During the check the dude made eye contact with me and I was just like

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

3 months

Thank you for all the love. It’s more serious this time than my mom had mentioned. The other relapsed were 2-3 hour surgeries but this one will be 6 hours. Scary 😔

Isai

@IsaiBCortez

3 months

My moms cancer just came back again it’s the 4th freaking time! Damn it!

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

1 month

@Frediculous I’ve been on a Panda Express kick recently. Your son ain’t wrong 😂😂

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

14 days

I got tired of some client that refused to provide me with documents I need and calls me every few weeks demanding a "status update" Last call I said dude come pick up your documents and your money. He was a bit shocked like "you are giving me my money back?" LOL yes bro, go!

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

My son is a vibe when he eats 😂😂

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

29 days

@ElReneChavez @historyinmemes I used to train with rener and ryron back in the mid 2000s great dudes

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

20 days

New gi who dis 🥋

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

13 days

@Frediculous Yessir my wife and I are the type of CC users that CC companies hate. We spend and keep our balance at zero. Then travel and enjoy all the prizes.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

24 days

@MillionsWithMe It’s a great life. People are blinded by the media to assume they’re all rockstars or celebrities. Look at their lives not the highlights but the low lights. He’s living the dream.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

1 month

Gang gang

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

3 months

Can I file an extension after the deadline? Can we go ahead and file the second extension?

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

17 days

I’m muting everyone that posts about people working 9-5s (I don’t but I respect the grind) in a negative way or hypothetical people with “can you retire with $700k or if you had $1m” this is just dumb. Not even a real conversation just imaginary things. Pointless.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

Did I just buy a drone that follows me? You betcha

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

22 days

My niece is adorable but how’s my fade?

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

Been down all day. Got food poisoning at a trusted taco truck last night. Haven’t had something like this in 20 years. First true sick day in years 😷 Feels like the end of the world 😫

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

Gang gang

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

I sold a condo during the pandemic for $545k which was $40k above asking. The people that bought it just sold it almost 4 years later for $815k in Highland Park. This is wild. The condo has no amenities and is under 1200 SqFt. Bravo to them.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

27 days

Young guy at the corner store: can I ask you what you do for work? Me: I’m a tax lawyer Young guy: bro that’s sick (gives me a bro slap and fist handshake) you’re doing the lord’s work Me:

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

1 month

RIP legend. You inspired my family that travel was more than rest and fun, but a way to reflect on the short time we get on this planet. Your vibes live on ✊🏽

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

3 months

I love #taxtwitter ✊🏽 😂 Internet person: yall don’t do much #taxtwitter :

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

1 month

My son is graduating from pre-school. He’s dropping out to form a boy band. The Sesame Street Boy 😂😂

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

3 months

@KurtisCarman @girdley What did they see? We want answers 😂

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

1 month

Dad summer school program today is Korean lessons. Live tutor in Korea. Which is cool, but 7a bootcamp style 😂

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

1 month

Rule #1 lie to the street food ladies when they ask you what you do for a living. Since they found out I’m a lawyer my morning quesadilla has gone from $6 to $11 😔 I swear she just be making up prices on the spot 😂

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

“The little girl behind the stand 🎻 “ From the bottom of my heart I pray her life story is a happy one 🙏🏽

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

Fixed my Samsung refrigerator’s ice maker with a steamer and hairdryer. The funny thing is that it was the first thing I saw on YouTube. Thought it was dumb. Wasted 3 days with Samsung support and finally tried it and boom we have ice 😂

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

3 months

Someone just pointed to my son as they talked to their kid having a meltdown and said “look at him he’s just sitting there not bothering anyone” and I’m dead 💀☠️ I’m out $50 with the item I just promised him so he could chill out 😂😂

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

I’m all for get rich quick schemes, but if you want to involve me at least show me you got rich first 😂😂

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

1 month

My wife just sent me this 😂😂😂😂😂😂

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

1 month

Dad summer bootcamp jiu jitsu. No days off I don’t care if he’s 4 😂😂 kidding I love that he’s 4 and I’m enjoying my time while I have it.

Isai

@IsaiBCortez

1 month

Dad summer school program today is Korean lessons. Live tutor in Korea. Which is cool, but 7a bootcamp style 😂

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

21 days

@tlar @mohamadfakih8 @TorontoPolice The truck is showing the inside of a mosque

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

St. Louis omg what a freakin vibe 🤤

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

29 days

@WhitneyChanell @Frediculous I would agree she’s respectful. I would say she was ungrateful though: “not feeling or showing gratitude.”

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

1 month

Technology and the global economy is beautiful when used for good. My kids are getting Spanish lessons from a Mexican teacher in Mexico. Amazing.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

3 months

My buddy just sent me this 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

˗ˏˋmewtru´ˎ˗

@trunarla

3 months

Bro my tax guy just sent me this… how cooked am I?

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

3 months

I prefer not to get into debates that are too political but pancakes are better than waffles.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

23 days

Omg my wife just got me this for Father’s Day ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

3 months

Quick trip to Rolan Hays Mexico 🫶🏼

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

What a beautiful stadium @Cardinals

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

Lately I’ve been feeling like I don’t have a creative outlet. My wife said after X period of time I think you finally burned out. So I want to make content, maybe travel. Idk, but I want to hit my creative side inspired by @MrScottEddy and @marktechson What is interesting?

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

3 months

Just told my son he’s going to have to fight another little boy in a Muay Thai fight. Told him the other boy is going to really try to hit him. He’s currently showing me all these hilarious Chuck Norris moves that he’s going to use to win, he looks like a drunk uncle 😂😂

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

13 days

Left my house at 5a to meet 3 clients that have been dying to meet in person. Just pushing hard. So far 2 have canceled and 1 is due in 7 mins? Is he canceling too? Should we bet? I’m just sitting here like a dummy.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

1 month

My little man learning piano in his Muay Thai outfit 😂

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

My daughter is circling the timer so she can see how much more time she has 😂😂 not slick.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

Today is Wednesday Today is Wednesday Today is Wednesday Today is Wednesday Today is Wednesday Today is Wednesday Today is Wednesday Today is Wednesday Today is Wednesday Today is Wednesday Today is Wednesday Today is Wednesday

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

Going to cut my sons hair and my daughter made a styles list 😂 with glasses options 😎

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

Me agreeing with Bernie on anything is the wildest thing ever 😳 Bernie is correct and Netanyahu needs to go.

Bernie Sanders

@BernieSanders

3 months

Mr. Netanyahu, antisemitism is a vile and disgusting form of bigotry that has done unspeakable harm to millions. Do not insult the intelligence of the American people by attempting to distract us from the immoral and illegal war policies of your extremist and racist government.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

My kids got my wife perfume for mothers day and they also thought it would be a good idea for everyone to “smell good” 😷

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

1 month

I started muting engagement farming personal finance people. They just make up fights about investments, retirements, renting/owning, eating out/at home, etc. Like no one is fighting about that. So weird.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

What’s crazy to me (I know this is Canada but we do the same in the US) is that we’ve allowed universities public and private to insanely raise their tuition prices while they essentially hoard so much wealth. Either tax them or don’t allow them to hoard so much wealth.

Sulaiman Ahmed

@ShaykhSulaiman

2 months

MCGILL UNIVERSITY LAUNCHED THEIR ENCAMPMENT TODAY McGill University gave $74 million in direct investment in companies complicit genocide. Students demand that the University divest.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

Neighbor across the street bought a house for $1.33m and now he’s putting about $40k in landscaping and curb appeal.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

Met a smoke legend 🔥

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

I haven't had caffeine in 48 hours, should I keep it going?

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

3 months

@pitdesi

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

17 days

Currently at a family event. A group of women talking about another group of women and how the other women want to be catered to. Me to myself: stay quiet stay quiet stay quiet

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

3 months

Why haven’t tortilla companies capitalized on the solar eclipse? Who do I need to talk to?

Emman “DCAing and living in peace”

@IssaAnchorBaby

3 months

Got the total eclipse in my backyard in Austin, TX.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

I have a $129 @JetBlue credit that expires in 14 days. Is anyone booking anytime soon? I am not going anywhere JetBlue flies to in the near future unfortunately so I am happy to share it with someone that is about to book. We can figure out logistics.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

3 months

Just got my state refund that pays for my IRS tax bill because someone adjusted the additional withholdings to the wrong agency.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

3 months

@miblogestublog I see what you did 😂😂

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

1 month

Roaring kitty games the game and the system almost crashes. Pelosi games the game and she just gets richer. What a time to be alive.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

3 months

@kjb_cpa Not gonna lie a good chimichanga is a beautiful thing 😂😂

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

13 days

Mannnnn anyone feel like they don’t know who to vote for? I’m legitimately stumped.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

My house looks like we had a rager. Turns out it wasn’t food poisoning but some stomach bug cause now everyone in my house is sick.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

The pandemic has made things seem like forever and at the same time a short period. Weird mental warfare.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

3 months

I’m supposed to go to Missouri next month on a 737-800 via southwest and just decided to lose the ticket and go on an airbus via AA. The airbus trip is harder to get to for departure but these planes spook me.

R A W S A L E R T S

@rawsalerts

3 months

🚨 #BREAKING : A Boeing 737 Southwest Airlines had to Make a Emergency Landing after parts of the Engine Cowling Detaches 📌 #Denver | #Colorado Currently, emergency crews and authorities are on the scene after a Boeing 737-800 Southwest Airlines Flight WN3695/SWA3695 departing

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

Every office should have a panini grill next to the microwave.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

3 months

@theacountantcpa Whatever helps you sleep at night.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

Diddy is an awful human being. Geez.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

15 days

@Galaxxius @PicturesFoIder Yup and also this ain’t it man. No manhood.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

3 months

@vs_digitusdata @MailOnline The genius behind it is that he was engaging without doing much. He knew the haterade was strong with many people that think they should all have a rockstar lifestyle. His life is more common than what you see on social media of pure highlights.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

I feel like companies have gone through their unsubscribe list and were like "its been a long time, maybe you want to hear from us now"

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

23 days

Happy Father’s Day fellow goons

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

1 month

Why does my body hurt? Oh because I’m dumb and forget how old I am.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

19 days

I love messing with scammers 😂😂

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

1 month

☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️😂😂😂😂

Kyle J. Bauman, CPA

@kjb_cpa

1 month

@IsaiBCortez @cordes_tax I gotchu. #TeamPancake

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

25 days

@BowTiedYukon Around my kids everyone is on trial. Adults and other kids are weird man. I’m hawkish.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

@dougboneparth I was in Missouri this last week and I marveled at my ability to lay down and do nothing. Not even twittering just lay down 😂😂

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

3 months

😂😂😂

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

@mistervvs_ That’s dope dude. He was checking you out checking out your vibe and he liked it. Hope yall make good money together.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

25 days

😂☠️😂☠️

Devon ☀️

@devonzuegel

26 days

Need to get this flag for my office

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

3 months

@taxpreptech ✊🏽✊🏽

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

1 month

My brother in law had an @innoutburger_ referral appreciation night. Pretty smart 😂🙏🏽❤️ can’t believe how many people came for free In-N-Out

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

13 days

$7 ❤️❤️ I miss this part of living in the City. This was a small plate cause the lady kept trying to pile stuff on and I’m like I’m an office worker the other fellas are going to work it off on the job.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

24 days

I thought we were supporting Ukraine to defend Ukrainian sovereignty, but after listening Graham talk about Ukrainian resources I see that’s all about money.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

@danyay Never mind I see she left him when he was broke then went back with him when he started making money again. Got it ✅ your tweet makes more sense I missed that.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

@famandfire Pretty much giving my kids a layup in life so we can’t go. However as soon as they start college we are out. I love Mexico too, but hasn’t been the same for me since the panny. I prefer Spain over Mexico now.

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Isai

@IsaiBCortez

2 months

Remember that girl crying while making a cake? Well her ex husband exposed her 🫥