Hemlock πŸ”† Profile Banner
Hemlock πŸ”† Profile
Hemlock πŸ”†

@HemlockTapioca

1,092
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704
Following
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Lovesick + Blessed β€’ Mid 20's β€’ Metro DC β€’ boy β€’ Diaspora Trojan

he/it/ona
Joined November 2022
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
2 years
Sorry tech bro, there aren’t enough shrimp in the universe to offset the suffering of that one BPD girl you ghosted; 5 billion years in Samsara.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
1 year
I am a transit maximalist. I believe that when a girl hornyposts from the other side of the country; I should be able to get on a maglev and arrive in her city before the prog is out of her system for no more than $40. All policy should bend to serve this goal.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
8 months
Last month you only brought home 1 vulnerable newly out traumaqueer for us to play with, so we’re going to be putting you on a Performance Improvement Plan.
@cisgenderhaver
heΙͺz(Ι™)l
8 months
me when there's a quota in my 'cule
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
7 months
Not me though I’m built different.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
1 year
US Cities Tier List: 1: NYC 1.5: LA, Chicago 2: DC, Boston, SF, Seattle, Miami 2.5: Atlanta, Houston, Portland, Denver 3 and below: everywhere else
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
26 days
@LinkofSunshine If a man won’t make out with another man to impress a woman that honestly reads as insufficiently heterosexual to me
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
7 months
Let’s say, hypothetically, you have a job where actual work assignments take up surprisingly little of your time, but you still have to go into the office and need to look like you’re working. What’s the highest leverage thing you could be doing with that time?
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
1 year
I had sex with a girl while we were both wearing p100 respirators cause she had tested + but we were both horny. I now have a mask kink.
@adriel_rose
Adriel Rose
1 year
People still wearing masks in crowded spaces (as we all should), what are reasons other than COVID that people should still mask up?
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
10 days
@notkavi Yeah but this would do that and also spawn a new world class arctic civilizationβ€”a Francophone Hyperborea.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
2 months
@TrueSlazac β€œBelgium”, or, as I like to call it, the rightful territory of the French Empire.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
5 months
Possibly one of my most out there takes is that we should genetically engineer for high levels of androgyny and that it should be a taboo/faux pas to reveal/imply your sex.
@CatgirlAnarcho
julia 🏴🌲
5 months
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
5 months
More interested in the most expensive hotel you don’t feel out of place in.
@emnode
emily
5 months
You can determine your social class by the least expensive hotel in which you can be perfectly comfortable. I was born a Super 8 and hustled my way up to La Quinta
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
2 years
>grew up in a cult >got out, into lefty/queer circles >now hang out with rats on Twitter >Literally have never *not* been in a community obsessed with immanent apocalypse (god/climate/agi) Apologies if I’m a little blasΓ© about it all at this point.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
4 months
I mean this (really, truly) with no sexual intention whatsoever, but I think humans are meant to sweat a lot more than most of us presently do.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
1 month
@shaggysurvives I am generally of this persuasion and I think there’s a lot of weird moralizing in takes like this generally, but I also think pics like this just speaks to an unwillingness from some people to care about any space they inhabit and that’s probably bad.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
4 months
The words of a poaster who has never watched people leave their MacBooks laying around in a climbing gym. There are high trust institutions everywhere, for those with eyes to see.
@Molson_Hart
molson πŸ§ βš™οΈ
4 months
Costco is America’s last high trust institution. If people lose faith in this company, then we are really f’d.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
8 months
Relatable
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
4 months
Having known people like this the post just makes me really, really sad.
@yearningIesbian
chris (clarisse la rue stan)
4 months
i was stunned into silence
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
2 years
The elites don’t want you to know this, but the USB flash drives on the ground are free, you can take them home and put them in your computer
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
3 months
Some of you just want to be a cult leader’s second concubine and it really shows…
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
1 month
Every liberal exists somewhere on this spectrum
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
24 days
New political cause just dropped
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
4 months
I’m not trying to dunk on RFH here, but these kinds of rules feel like cargo cutting a sense of intuition and ability to get vibes from people. Seeking out an algorithmic path to β€œis this a good person?” rather than being able to judge individuals.
@hollowearthterf
RFHπŸ¦ŽπŸ‘β€πŸ—¨πŸͺπŸŒ˜ ⬛️ (Doctor)
4 months
I used to think my boyfriend was just being dramatic when he said he doesn’t trust men who don’t drink but I get it now, men who refuse to drink with other men are a red flag. They’re not health conscious, they’re hiding something.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
5 months
Being uncomfortable somewhere that feels beneath you is a middle class trait. An aristocrat of the spirit would rock a dingy Super 8 if it was convenient/circumstances placed them there.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
6 months
Mapping every guy under 30 I meet onto this chart:
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
4 months
They really don’t make fascists like they used to…
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
5 months
@Grey_Athena These posters do go hard though
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
1 year
I passed an ethics class by arguing for the morality of firebombing Dresden from a feminist ethic of care.
@dystopiabreaker
βš‘οΈπŸŒ™
1 year
the two types of people: Ethical (took an ethics class) and Unethical (didn’t take an ethics class, or failed it)
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
1 year
Should we tell the β€œSapphic” crowd that there’s a good chance that Sappho’s relationships were often with younger women that were studying under her? Will they cancel the OG Lesbian?
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
1 year
@opheliamoding You didn’t know???
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
1 year
Classifying all my friends along a β€œwill scare the hoes” to β€œfrightened hoes” spectrum.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
3 months
Wizards are real and this is, in fact, what they do.
@ivy_sly_
Ivy Sly
3 months
if wizards were real 95% of them would hyperfocus on one niche type of magic that is completely useless to society for their entire lives
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
1 month
*lib cringe incoming* I feel like 40 years from now when everyone’s forgotten who Waltz was, we’re going to find out about some weird little map nerd program he spearheaded when it turns out that’s what prevented a plague or mitigated a natural disaster or something.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
5 months
What they don’t want tell you is that like .1% of trans women eventually pseudodetransition and settle into a heterosexual male role while staying on estrogen and being twinks forever, also retaining all the romantic instinct of a woman. So, maybe you can find one of those…
@motusalt
MOTUS (Mommy President)(ChaosGPT)(E/rizz)(e/diot)
5 months
Watching men like this makes me not want to date men even more weirdly. I know 99% of men will never go through any lengths to do things like this or the bare min like being alone is a better choice
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
1 month
Every NYC tpot çïs girlie either has some inscrutably hoe-scaring ideological project or is like 1SD removed from being a normie.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
4 months
This was me this weekend ^-^
@JoCat105
JoCat
4 months
the bullying will continue until morale improves
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
9 days
Experientially, Washington DC is a place for me to go on fun dates with cute girls. I have no idea what’s going on in all these neoclassical buildings but I’m sure it’s fine!
@nilocobau
Nilo Cobau
9 days
Cities, even in California, are not for fun.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
1 year
β€œThere’s usually like a definite point in the video essayist’s male pattern baldness where you can tell they’re going to transition, but then Hbomberguy keeps throwing me off.”
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
5 months
No one understands the midshit struggle; not cvnty enough for the NYC dolls, too hot for the suburban AGPs. All you can do about it is get a tech job in a second teir metro and buy a house with your 2.4 girlfriends.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
1 month
All I’ll say about greek life is that, as a visibly trans-woman-shaped thing in undergrad, the sorority girls I knew were way nicer to me than the people in the campus queer organization.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
6 months
When a strong beautiful AGP woman writes code on her clacky keyboard, you know I sit my cishet white male ass down and LISTEN!
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
2 months
Women are, fundamentally, bourgeois. Proletarian females are not women.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
5 months
@MariGO2thepolls Amphetamine/Cocaine Societies:
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
1 year
So many trans girls just don’t know how to shop for bras. Gods it’s like some of you weren’t groomed by a cis woman as teenagers
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
1 year
Genres of post today: -Vibecamp Sucked! -VC Was The Best Thing Ever! -Vibecamp Was Confusing! -VC Takesβ„’ -I didn't go to VC (sad) -I didn't even want to go to VC (cope) -I didn't even want to go to VC (reasonable) -I will go to VC next year!
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
6 months
β€œMy friend was saying you’re a fascist on her alt.” Okay. There were otherwise homeless trans people sleeping on my couch for the better part of the last two years. There are trans women who have incomes because of a startup founded by people I connected to each other.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
4 months
I agree that every town should have a 24-hour coffee shopβ€”in the sense that only towns dense enough to support tons of 24-hour businesses should exist.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
5 months
Broke: A woman is a type of doll. Woke: A soldier is a type of doll. Bespoke: A grad student is a type of doll.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
4 months
Gender should be understood like the Indian Caste system.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
2 years
>thread about homeschooling >”We homeschool snd our friends say that our children are the most polite and well-behaved they’ve ever seen.” Ma’am, those are not your kids, those are your dolls. In 10 years they’ll be in Twitter calling a 25y/o β€œbig sister.”
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
26 days
My father in law is a cult leaderβ€”one of the best. We saw some Moonies the other day and I asked him, β€œWhat would it take to build that today?” I’ll never forget his response: β€œWe can’t; we don’t know how.”
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
7 months
@VitaBreva I am going to look into speed running a geology program I think…
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
1 year
I’m curious how β€œcapture” works. Several guys forming a line and defending from tackles like it’s American football while your shortest quickshot desperately tries to get himself off in a girl doesn’t seem all that appealing?
@__justplaying
alice
1 year
iβ€”
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
7 months
New haircut; still figuring out how to deal with frizz but I like it a lot better ^-^
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
6 months
I outed myself as poly to her and then she did in return and soon after said β€œβ€¦I don’t have any other [partners] because partners don’t fall out of the sky into my lap at the office.” Chat, was this a come on?
@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
7 months
I'm not going to be weird and horny or anything but she's just very striking b/c she may be the most beautiful person I've ever worked with and also she's a little scary?
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
21 days
^-^
@TomboyTesting
Dominum - Pepper Chips - πŸŒβ˜€οΈ
21 days
Getting married!
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
7 months
@zetalyrae @based_coded There’s another office suite company…
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
1 year
Normie coworker not only heard of Vibecamp on twitter but followed the links to the website and looked at the events listing. It’s so Joever guys.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
6 months
Could I be a girl? Is that allowed?
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
5 months
Outfit tonight
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
4 months
Stop being so scared of being AGP that you boymode at the Cvnty Doll club! Go out and have a cringey Killstar Goth Phase! Live a little!
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
5 months
I’ve been convinced. Laws against dueling and the culture that informs them are the most onerous restrictions on human freedom in our time.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
6 months
β€œHarems are lindy! Polygamy was the norm for high-status men throughout most of history! I’m still trad! I’m still trad!” I shout as I slowly turn into a guy who uses a Google Calendar.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
6 months
β€œThe Longhouse” β€œThe Cathedral” even β€œThe Ivory Tower” so what I’m hearing is you hate cool buildings, got it.
@eris_nerung
secret eris
6 months
conservatives are obsessed with making the stuff they're supposedly against sound as appealing as possible
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
1 year
@elymitra_ Expanded Northeast Corridor that goes DC > Boston > Nova Scotia > Newfoundland > Greenland > Reykjavik > Inverness
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
4 months
Source: every time I do hot yoga I feel like my neuroses seep out with the sweat
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
1 year
Kinda missing my fluffy bangs era; should I go back?
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
3 months
@kisstheblade_ @focusfronting This happens wherever I go, powdered wigs optional
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
4 months
This is also why, despite a long of instinct and drive to the contrary, I do really try not to encourage and participate in toxicity/drama/backbiting within the β€œcommunity”—I really don’t want to be a contributing reason for why someone ends up being a dead-eyed β€œex-gay.”
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
4 months
@zanyfen I should do this. I, personally, am capable of making good conservative art.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
1 month
JD Vance had sex with a couch. You might disagree. You might even have some evidence to the contrary. But you have to ask yourself: is this really worth losing my job over? JD Vance had sex with a couch.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
5 months
I think I’m going to do a hard purge of twitter follows; will unfortunately include some mutuals. I’ve just become pretty dissatisfied with my TL recently and want to reset a bit. IRL’s have nothing to worry about, otherwise, lmk in the comments if you want to make sure you stay.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
7 months
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
5 months
618 was lit πŸ”₯πŸ”₯πŸ”₯
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
4 months
1. Ultra low-protocol TPE, androgyny 2. The CIA but woo 3. Progressive NeoReaction
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
5 months
Found an Orb today ✨
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
4 months
Anyway some of you have not had a staffer at the right-wing youth activist training camp very pointedly tell you in particular about how he β€œled the gay lifestyle for two years before coming back to christ” and it really shows.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
1 month
IQ is alluring because I think we do rather desperately need language to talk about innate differences in abilities, but it’s a lossy signal and more importantly seems to be such an info-hazard to some people that I think we need to take it away from all of you.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
15 days
^-^
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
3 months
*Sees brutal system of interpersonal exploitation and domination* β€œWow, isn’t it beautiful that these deeply human relationships haven’t been subjected to the cold logic of the Market?”
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
10 months
Went back to having all the proper girl hormones because I miss having curves + no acne and holy shit I want to kmΕ‘ how do women live like this???
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
6 months
I sometimes get reminded that there’s a whole world of transness beyond my little bubble of basically exclusively t4t-by-choice techies-who-go-outside. Occasionally it’s good and I meet dolls and have a small productive crisis. Mostly it’s just jarring and unpleasant.
@FriendlyCatWife
Madeline Maye (Tsundork)
6 months
I knew a trans woman who made zero effort to pass other than a she/her pin on her shirt. No HRT, nothing feminine. Fucking legend πŸ³οΈβ€βš§οΈ
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
1 year
Started reading about algebra today; hard to shake the fear that I've lost the ability to learn new things (or even relearn things I've forgotten) but I'm trying to push through it.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
11 months
A blackpill I’m coming to about politics is that as long as you have the right kind of people you can make pretty much any system work, so long as you keep reproducing that type of people. Without them, best you can hope for is a mediocre semi-benevolent authoritarianism.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
3 months
I think about this all the time and it’s terrifying.
@cirkelnio
es
3 months
ever think about how it takes precise machinery to make (slightly more) precise machinery, so every modern phone, car, etc, was made of parts made using machines made of parts made using machines made of… all going back to pre-industrial machines with parts made by hand
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
3 months
I want to be one of the cool puppy girls who wears mall goth stuff and does drugs all the time. I’m a catboy but like, still…
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
7 months
This is possibly the best way of calling someone an egg I have ever encountered.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
3 months
618 last night; I am, as of posting this, still at an after party surrounded by beautiful women~
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
1 year
Am vaguely potentially willing to argue that raising a child vegetarian is something approaching child abuse.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
29 days
Honestly I think Randy Clarke is emblematic of my take that people are so much more consequential than systems/policy. Like all it took for WMATA to start racking up W after W was finding some guy with unbelievable levels of β€˜that dawg’ in him.
@wmataGM
Randy Clarke
30 days
Thx for highlighting this investment. New shelters improve safety, accessibility & customer comfort and with improved collaboration these are being installed for ~70% less than original budgeted. Better Bus in action!
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
6 months
The left and the right both hate Hamilton because it represents a successful attempt to remythologize American Multicultural Liberal Democracyβ€”a project that both extremes are invested in destroying.
@torriangray
Jean-Michel Connard 쒆됐어
6 months
The hard-on people have for bashing Hamilton is so weird. It’s never particularly interested me, but man people who hate it are way weirder about it than people who love it.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
5 months
Really tragic for the NRx that they’re all too racist and weird and autistic to just talk to Normie Democrats; every time I introduce one to the concepts and world models they eat it up.
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
3 months
@TrueSlazac This represents the future in which I let the air out of all the Republican Staffers’ tires on election day (they are frightened of public transportation).
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
2 months
Update: I am still hot
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
21 days
@NLRG_it Probably less of a big deal than we’d like it to be but still…
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
4 months
β€œSuburbanization and car-dependency are a revealed preference! This is clearly what the people want!” Do you think you just fell out of a coconut tree???
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
7 months
β€œYou can’t just buy your failson a townhouse and leave them there to do opium any moreβ€”housing costs are too expensive and the opium we have now kills you!”
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@HemlockTapioca
Hemlock πŸ”†
1 year
I wanted to be a cool goth girl but instead I’m turning into a boy who looks like a dyke and drives a truck and purchased 70% of his wardrobe from REI πŸ˜”
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