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Tom Breihan Profile
Tom Breihan

@tombreihan

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Author of 'The Number Ones', out 11/15 via Hachette Books. Senior Editor at Stereogum.

Charlottesville, VA
Joined June 2009
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
4 years
Pepsi branding is funny cuz The Weeknd is really more of a coke guy
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
9 years
The 1975's new album is absurd and embarrassing, and I really like it. My review:
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
5 years
Wrote about Lana Del Rey's Norman Fucking Rockwell, the best album of 2019:
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
6 years
shout out to all my people flying to wyoming to listen to a 20-minute album that's going to be out for public consumption in 7 hours anyway.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
3 years
The difference with BTS is that it's the fans doing the manipulation, not the labels. I don't really understand that impulse, but in an atomized age, that's what's driving popularity. BTS has the most mobilized, devoted fan army, and that's why they're winning.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
4 years
I'm writing a Number Ones book.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
5 years
The first Girls album has seemingly left absolutely no cultural footprint, but it spun my whole shit around and I still love it. Wrote about it a decade later:
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
3 years
This is my dad, Jack Breihan. He had a good life, and he died this morning.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
6 years
14 lines down on the Lollapalooza poster.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
3 years
As of today, I have worked at Stereogum for 10 years, and my job has given me an absolutely baffling sense of security in a landscape that typically offers none. Thank you to @scottgum for keeping me around that long and for everyone who's read my stuff.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
3 years
I've seen this quote from my Violent J interview going around in the past few days, and I gotta add that he just brought all this stuff up on his own, in response to the question "hey, remember when you were on that Three 6 Mafia song"
@AbeGoldfarb
Abe Goldfarb
3 years
Sometimes I think about Violent J and I am reminded that people can change.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
6 months
I was ready for a very bad day online when I published this, and I got the opposite. Thank you to everyone who read and responded. Music criticism always comes from a place of love, and I take my job real seriously.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
6 years
Wanna hi-five strangers over Phil Elverum/Michelle Williams. That's that good shit right there.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
14 days
Hadn't seen Vampire Weekend in a long time, and I was not prepared for how good their live show is now. Really blew me away.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
9 days
Sorry you're exhausted. So am I. Would love to stop writing the phrase "Israeli genocide" but it needs to stop happening first.
@MarkusSwift1
Mark Schiff
10 days
@stereogum Exhausted by writers like @tombreihan just casually accusing #israel of genocide in stories like these. "Israel’s campaign of genocide..." is used lazily, like its simply a fact, not opinion. You can write blogs like this without intentionally mischaracterizing what's happening.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
6 years
I'd like to invite all my friends to join me in blissfully ignoring Mac DeMarco forever.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
7 years
10 best new January albums I heard: 1. Jeff Rosenstock: POST- 2. Maxo Kream: Punken 3. Closer: All This Will Be 4. Payroll Giovanni & Cardo: Big Bossin, Vol. 2 5. Camila Cabello: Camila 6. Tribulation: Down Below 7. Summoning: With Doom We Come 8. Migos: Culture II...
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
7 months
Thinking about how Post Malone has near-universal goodwill these days despite looking like an actual pile of garbage to an extent that I find honestly impressive. He must be the best hang in the world.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
4 years
Taylor Swift is (1) announcing her album drop on the same day as the One Direction 10th-anniversary thing, (2) making the indie record that circa-2012 Jake Gyllenhaal was probably bugging her to make, and (3) potentially releasing an album on the same day as Kanye West. Amazing.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
3 years
I'm sick of talking about this now, so I'm not gonna be engaging in whoever shows up in my mentions, but there it is. I was wrong. Good job, BTS.
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Tom Breihan
3 years
Nobody really deserves a #1 hit -- deserve's got nothing to do with it -- but they're playing the same game as everyone else, and they're playing it better. BTS now have a bunch of #1 hits with virtually no radio support, and that's kind of inspiring, in a way.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
2 years
My book The Number Ones is out today. Thanks to everyone at Stereogum and everyone who reads the column for helping me get to this point. It feels truly insane. I hope people like the book.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
5 years
Wrote about the 20th anniversary of the best album that anyone made in 1999:
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
9 months
Goddamn, I am so fucking mad right now. Everyone else in my house is asleep, and I'm half-drunk and tweeting about the state of the music press. Don't know what to do with myself. Seems bad.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
6 years
Please be advised that Eminem shows up on the Boogie album and says "like a shepherd having sex with his sheep, fuck what you heard"
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
7 years
Please be warned that there's a new Eminem remix out there on the internet where he rhymes "smack a whore" with "Macklemore."
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
5 years
For the first time in my lifetime, we had a chance at electing an actual principled left-wing president and building a massive popular front, and now the Democratic party is pissing it away. I'm disgusted.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
4 years
There's a very small list of rappers who could just keep you hanging on every word, wondering where they're going to twist things next. DOOM was one of those. A truly great writer.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
4 years
Flea’s filmography is sick as fuck: Suburbia, Thrashin, Less Than Zero, Back to the Future 2-3, Private Idaho, Son in Law, a classic Simpsons, The Chase, Big Lebowski, Fear & Loathing, Inside Out, Baby Driver, Toy Story 4, Queen & Slim.
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Tom Breihan
9 months
I have been in music criticism for 20 damn years, and in that time, I have never met anyone more devoted to her job than Amy Phillips, my old boss, at Pitchfork. I cannot even fathom the idea of that site without her. Absolute lunacy.
@amyhphillips
Amy Phillips
9 months
Welp… it happened. My time @pitchfork is being brought to an end, as it was announced today that the publication is being folded into GQ. It’s been the honor of my life to have worked here for the past 18-and-a-half (!) years…
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Tom Breihan
1 year
still proud that I wrote this.
@BabyxShad
R A S H A D/ 9.0 Baby
1 year
Funny how things change.
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Tom Breihan
5 years
Shout out to Janet Weiss, quite possibly the best rock drummer in the world. Sleater-Kinney were lucky to have her.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
6 months
@GhostChannels you really think i would halfass a thing like this?
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
8 months
Wiping everything from a long-running website should honestly be a crime.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
3 years
I never do this, but I think I was wrong to write this piece, or at least to frame it the way I did. The Billboard charts have never, ever been sacrosanct, and they've always been subject to manipulation.
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Tom Breihan
3 years
Pretty fuckin wack that the AV Club, after forcing its entire staff to quit, is populating its main page by recirculating articles that I wrote years ago. They didn't ask for my permission, and I wouldn't have given it.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
4 years
Things I learned from researching popular music: The guy who wrote the elegiac "Layla" coda also played drums on the Incredible Bongo Band "Apache" & got sampled a million times. That guy is now in psychiatric prison for murdering his mother with a hammer & butcher knife in 1983.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
3 years
I think "Butter" is a bad song, an example of cynical committee songwriting, and the fact that the label head gets a credit is gross. But lots of songs way worse than that have gotten to #1 .
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
5 years
Wrote about Kanye West, who can get the fuck out of here with this bullshit:
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
7 months
Wrote about the singular, chaotic magic of Madvillainy, an album that is two days shy of its 20th birthday:
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
1 year
oh fuck oh no what have I done
@Jacobkupp
jay
1 year
hey @tombreihan are you excited to review ten different cage the elephant songs over the next half decade
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Tom Breihan
3 years
The whole phenomenon is kinda weird for me because most of the stuff that I love never had half a chance at getting to #1 . I can't relate. But from what I can see, there's an actual community here. That's cool. That deserves respect.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
4 years
Just had a great conversation.
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Tom Breihan
9 months
I love my old friends from Pitchfork, and I wish them all the best. The decisions of media-owner types simply make no sense.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
5 years
10 favorite singles of Q3 2019: 1. Taylor Swift: "The Archer" 2. Angel Olsen: "Lark" 3. Channel Tres: "Black Moses" [ft. JPEGMAFIA] 4. Lana Del Rey: "The Greatest" 5. HAIM: "Summer Girl" 6. Sauce Walka: "New Sauce City" 7. Camila Cabello: "Shameless"...
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
5 months
Whoa
@MissyElliott
Missy Elliott
5 months
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
5 years
Etiquette question: House full of young dudes, like 3 doors up from me, I only really know them to say hi when I'm walking dogs. Can I ask them for weed? They have so much weed.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
5 years
I am now 40. If you aren't doing so already, please ignore everything I have to say about music forever.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
3 years
If a pop-music entity is capable of inspiring that much devotion, and of getting a bunch of people to pay money for downloads, then I'm in no position to say their song shouldn't be #1 .
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
2 months
So disorienting to watch the Democratic party avoiding obvious fuckups.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
4 years
My 11-year-old wanted to know all about the Taylor album, and this led to her asking me “what’s indie rock?” Had no idea what to say.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
6 months
Two decades ago, Ghostface Killah, operating almost entirely without his Wu-Tang comrades and trying to find his own place within the chaotic world of Def Jam Records, released a classic. Wrote about The Pretty Toney album at 20:
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
3 years
*hell* yeah. *fuck* yeah.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
5 years
Wrote about my favorite version of Jay-Z, the disdainful amoral king-of-the-city one, and about Vol. 3, my favorite Jay album, at 20:
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
2 years
@jack_hamilton jack are you ok
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
5 years
what the heck
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
2 years
Wrote about Rihanna, who is still the coolest motherfucker in the room even when the room is a levitating space-platform inside a football stadium:
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
3 years
No Number Ones today. I usually still run the column on holidays, but MLK Day felt like the wrong time for an in-depth discussion of “Baby Got Back.”
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
4 years
Nobody can tell me shit today.
@edgarwright
edgarwright
4 years
I don’t hear anyone talking about this recurring column on @stereogum but it’s brilliant.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
4 months
damn somebody owes me some federalist papers
@fireh9lly
The Marshall McLuhan LP
4 months
The Federalist isn't even writing its own shitty music reviews for fascists, it's blatantly plagiarising Tom Breihan's Stereogum piece and using ChatGPT to change it
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Tom Breihan
1 year
Long story but I just found out someone tried to have me and my daughter kicked out of the Taylor Swift show for being tall. I spent the whole show doing everything in my power to stay out of this person's way, and I shoulda just stood there on my tippy toes with my arms out.
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Tom Breihan
3 years
Getting endless waves of BTS fans in my mentions for the past week has been annoying and also pretty weird. I anticipated that. But I gotta respect the passion! Labels can't manufacture that kind of response. They would if they could.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
3 years
Going to your dad's funeral is hard and sad and exhausting, but at least you only gotta do it once.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
4 years
This is Rufus. He's new.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
5 years
My boss is about to become, once again, the owner of the website that he started. This is cool.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
4 years
Not even really a laugh. It's like: "tuh." This is the *exact same sound* that I make when I hear a lyric that I think is clever. Never heard her make that sound before. Warmed my heart. So shout to Taylor Swift for that one. I appreciate it.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
8 years
Oh my god, D.R.A.M.'s album cover.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
8 years
Cool that Jackie Chan is getting an honorary Oscar this year but the Academy fucked up by never giving him a real one.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
1 year
Number Ones is a once-a-week thing from here on out. Another weekly column, on every #1 alternative hit, starts in two days.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
6 months
If you’re a normal human being, sure, maybe. But some of us are sick fucking animals, and we were made for times like these.
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Bloomberg
6 months
Whether you love or hate Taylor Swift's latest album, there is no way to adequately digest its 31 songs and write about it within hours of its release, says @jkarl26 via @opinion
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
5 years
It’s pretty fucked up that a dog has never been nominated for an Oscar.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
8 years
The heroism of those Dalllas cops, rushing to protect people protesting police brutality, is the one beautiful thing I see this morning.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
3 years
Pandemic has now lasted one full Weeknd album cycle.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
2 years
Without my book advance, there is noooo way I could've afforded that. But I got paid for the book, so she got her operation. She's home and feeling good. Shout out to everyone who read The Number Ones; you guys literally (albeit indirectly) saved my cat's life.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
10 months
My grandma Toni Breihan died yesterday. She made it to 103 - a real astronaut life.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
2 years
My fourth grader is staying home today because he couldn't sleep last night. I'm happy to have him with me. But also: Fuck this shit.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
1 year
Every year, @Passionweiss goes to Coachella and turns into Joan Didion. What the hell, man. How are the rest of us supposed to compete with this.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
5 months
Didn't expect to say this, but salute Macklemore.
@macklemore
Macklemore
5 months
HIND’S HALL. Once it’s up on streaming all proceeds to UNRWA.
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@tombreihan
Tom Breihan
9 months
In 2008, Pitchfork hired me and my dude @ryandombal as news writers when we got laid off from our job at a startup that never started. I lasted a couple of years. Ryan was there for 15 years, doing great work the whole time. They laid him off today. What the hell, dude.
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