ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary) @sweetsubkoo Twitter profile

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

1 year

⟡ AO3 ⋱ ⟡ CC ⋱ ⟡ Ko-fi ⋱

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

2 years

The weird thing about reading so much as a child and gaining a huge vocabulary from that is I can’t define a lot of the words I use, I just…know that they would fit correctly in a specific sentence? Does anyone else experience that?

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

2 years

Like I’ll write a sentence for a fic, read it back and then realize?? idk wtf that word means?? Then I look it up and it’s exactly right for what I was trying to convey. It’s like my brain has all this secret contextual vocab I’m not aware of

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

2 years

“Wow you’ve discovered being fluent in a language” y’all I’m not that clueless 😭 I just thought it was interesting that there’s a disconnect between what I consciously know and what my brain knows from context/patterns when it comes to very advanced vocabulary

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

2 years

@mandawritestuff Omg this comes up constantly with the 6 year old I nanny hahaha he’s super smart so I use my normal vocab and he stops me every two seconds to define shit and i often say it’s hard to explain and the other day he said “Anna I think you just make up words sometimes” I—

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Thinking about a touch-starved Nj who gets all vulnerable and pliant w skinship so he’s always said he doesn’t like touch,, but after a rly bad day, Jm hugs him and he’s too tired to fight it anymore and just melts and goes all soft and sweet and lets Jm take care of him :(((

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Sj’s omega hybrid, Jk, has been getting too cocky for his own good lately. When his behavior crosses a line, Sj calls in experts: Nj, and his alpha hybrid Yg- who happens to specialize in omega discipline and is more than happy to show Jk who’s really in charge.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

2 years

Hi I’m temporarily back. Yoongi’s vlog fucked me up in the head so I wrote mpreg about it. Link in next tweet

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

2 years

@k0_is_0k Yeah yeah!! like even some more common words I’d have trouble defining, i know so much but also I don’t 😵‍💫

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

1 year

No babe, you’re still cute, it’s just that the way you spent 19 hours making a spaceship floor plan for your threadfic instead of actually writing it threw me off

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

4 years

Okay but...“beta” jk staying with th during preheat, but jk suddenly starts nesting while th sleeps. He needs the space to be safe, and right (and god why is it so hot??) And when th wakes he’s far more lucid than jk, because jk is presenting and he’s not a beta, he’s an omega.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

2 years

I can’t stop thinking about the girlfriends at the ice rink yesterday who were holding mittened hands and giggling and so in love,, I heard one of them say “my nose is cold” and the other bumped their noses together and I nearly laid down on the ice to cry for a while

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

2 years

Can someone actually explain why I can read a 300k fic no problem but struggle to read a 70k word ebook/novel? Are there significant writing differences between the two mediums that make fic feel more digestible? Like, linguistically/stylistically?

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

2 years

Hello everyone this xkcd comic broke my heart in all the right ways so I decided to start writing an android jk/ot6 fic about it :3 threadfic below

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

2 years

@bargtenn I’ll occasionally get that too 😂 I’m always so shocked bc 95% of the time it turns out correct so that 5% I’m like!!! But it fit the vibe, it can’t be wrong!!!

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

2 years

I JUST GOT AWARDED $8000 IN SCHOLARSHIP MONEY 😭😭😭 that’s enough to cover at least half of my nursing program I’m gonna cry oh my godddd

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

No answer comes, because Nj is already fast asleep.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

1 year

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

2 years

I told a friend I had a meltdown in the Walmart parking lot today and they just brought me a big bag of mini mnms to sort bc “it would make me feel better” and you know what. they were absolutely correct I had a nice time

ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

2 years

Achieve maximum autism

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Calm and Quiet A/B/O continuation! When a fan gets too comfortable with Jk at a fansign soon after his presentation as an omega, Jm loses control, just a little bit. Bangtan does damage control and takes care of each other in the aftermath.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

2 years

cw / gynecology ?? ig BTS is the only topic doctors think I look excited enough to talk about bc every time they’re trying to build rapport/distract me they really latch on?? My gynecologist rly just had her actual fingers inside me asking “so who’s your favorite member”

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

2 years

@bratzd0llpjm No wayyyyy brains are so fucking cool 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Th smiles wide. “Thank you. Love you.” Sj kisses his nose. “Love you too. Now get off me. I gotta go make food.” After a thorough scenting and several kisses, Th lets him up and Sj gets to work.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

“Want cock,” Jk grumbles, and Yg growls lowly, in a comforting sort of way. “After,” he says. “Be patient.”

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Then the alpha makes a low rumbling noise, and that doesn’t need brainpower for Jk to understand- it means Yg will keep him safe. Jk lets himself drift to sleep, comforted by the arms around his waist and the knot locking them together.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

“I’ll be with Sj-hyung,” Nj says. “Don’t get into too much trouble.” “Don’t flirt too hard. You’ll pull a muscle,” Yg calls after Nj as he leaves.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Jm’s chest tightens with sadness. “Hyung, I’ll still be here tomorrow. When you wake up, I can still…I can still do this for you. You don’t have to be alone. I can give you hugs, and hold you, and be close, and so can the others. Is that what you want?”

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

And when they end up pressed against one another at the photographer’s direction, Jm pretends not to notice the way Nj tenses at his touch. Like it had always been, before. Somehow, it stings more, now.)

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Jm finally kisses him again, and Nj slips below the surface. But this time, he’s not scared, because he won’t be alone.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

A challenge. A chase. “You’re sure you want to do this, pup?” Yg warns, voice low and dangerous. He’s as still as can be. Jk twitches.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

2 years

/Can you hear me?/ We hear you. We hear you, and we’re coming. “Call the others,” Namjoon says, absolutely certain of his decision. “We have a rescue mission to plan.”

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

This is SO self indulgent and dramatic I’m v sorry, I just have too many experiences and feelings in my head and I gotta project them into long long threadfics or else I’ll explode and now all of you have to read the consequences

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Today was /terrible/. Granted, it’s not like any of Nj’s days lately have been very enjoyable, not with the imminent comeback production deadlines and the neverending schedules and the way that every single person at HYBE seems to have problems that only he can fix.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

2 years

Do y’all ever worry you’re never going to find a partner? I don’t think I’m unloveable or anything, but I have so many v specific things going on (lesbian, acespec, autistic, sub, etc) that it’s just like. Statistically how would I ever find someone who vibes w /all/ of that yk

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

4 years

Jk is slipping deeper into preheat, into presentation, and th hopes beyond belief that the hyungs get here quickly enough to help them both before something goes wrong.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Jm taps Nj’s forehead gently. “What are you thinking so hard about up here?” “You’re so pretty,” Nj slurs. It’s the first thing he’s said all night; his voice is low and husky. “Love you.”

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

2 years

if you think it’s dumb for people to freak out and make a big deal over twt falling apart…pls just remember that panic is a very valid reaction to the possibility of losing your community, and it’s normal to want to process that fear together as a group

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

He doesn’t think twice, parting his lips to accept it, even as his tongue slides wetly across Jm’s fingertips in the process. “So good for me,” Jm says reverently, like he can’t believe he’s being granted the trust to see this happen. To be part of it.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Th sighs dramatically. “I wish Jk-ie was here. I miss him. Do you think he’s gonna be sad we had fun without him?” “Oh,” Nj says with a wry smile. “I wouldn’t worry about it, pup. I think he and Yg had plenty of fun all by themselves.”

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

2 years

HAPPY HALLOWEEN BITCHES IM GONNA BE A NURSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🎊🎊🎉🎉🎈🎊🎉🎉🎊🎉🎈🎈🎈🎈🎈🎈🎈🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎊🎊🎉🎉🎉🎈🎈🎈

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

“Won’t have…have you,” Nj mumbles with a frown. “What do you mean? I’m right here, and I’ll stay even once you’re asleep, hm?” Nj shakes his head slowly. “When I wake up, ‘s gonna be t’morrow. Be ‘lone again.”

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

1 year

The answer comes anyway, a shout that floats atop the howling wind of a building storm. “Kim Namjoon, captain of the Starship Persona. We’re here to help! You’re safe now!” JK-0901 doesn’t believe them.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

“Sweet thing,” Jm says, and Nj can’t quite tell what complex emotion is coloring his words. “I love you too.”

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

2 years

I finally reformatted that filthy yoonkook smut/tender namjin feelings threadfic I wrote forever ago for AO3!! Here u go pls enjoy. Link in next tweet

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

“All done,” Jm says cheerfully. He tapes the final bandage into place. “You did so well, Hyung, sitting still for me.” The words sink Nj further into whatever headspace he’s lodged in. He did well. He’s making Jm happy.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

It worked, though, and soon enough there were no more voices, only the heavy patter of raindrops. Nj waited in the alley for far longer than he needed to before shuffling home.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

He sees the number of therapy sessions in their group calendar going up, up, up, as they approach release dates, until there’s so many in a single week that they have to start color coding so the members don’t mix up which appointment times are their own.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

He works, and works until he’s running on nothing but an hour of sleep he doesn’t feel entitled to and coffee that’s far too expensive for the way he chugs it, and he prays to a god he doesn’t believe in that someday all of this might not be so exhausting.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Not from each other. Just from him. Respecting his boundaries. It would be great, if he hadn’t been lying through his teeth from the very start.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Nj watches him do it every time, and even now he’s unsure whether he was jealous of how confident Jm is in giving his affection, or of the other boys for receiving it when Nj couldn’t. But none of that matters now, because Jm is petting /him/. Holding /him/.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

The words send a shiver down Nj’s spine and he opens his mouth preemptively for the next piece, eager to please. Jm swears under his breath. Nj distantly wonders why.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

He sees the way Sj winces, muscles screaming after he spends hours in the practice room trying to “catch up” on choreography, because no matter how many times they tell him he already does it perfectly, he never seems to believe them.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

He twitches suddenly, fighting off sleep as his body gets more and more insistent that he remedy his exhaustion. Jm smiles. “You’re so tired, honey. Stop fighting it now, you need rest.”

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Sometimes, Nj gets tired. He knows it’s what he signed up for when he accepted the position so many years ago. And sure, he didn’t expect it to always be /this/ hard, but he did know becoming the leader would give him extra responsibilities.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

And suddenly, when he sees how hard they all try to pretend like they’re not worn to the bone, it’s easier to push away the thoughts of asking for help. Nj can make it through, he always does. He does it so they don’t have to.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

They continue slowly like that, piece by piece until the fruit is gone. Nj preens under the constant praise. He never knew it was something he needed until Jm started giving it to him. That seems to be a common theme with them.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

11 months

I have a hurt/comfort littlespace jk fic that I used as an outlet for coping with the first enlistment and it was almost completed before I moved onto a new project—maybe I’ll finally finish and post it in honor of this final enlistment

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

And once they’ve settled him on the couch with that really soft blanket that everyone always fights over, they keep him company, because they’re observant, and it’s hard not to notice the way his shoulders tense when they walk away. It’s all Nj can ask for, really.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

~ Nj doesn’t eat all day bc he’s too anxious about getting work done ~ short scene of fans chasing Nj on the street and he’s distressed by it ~ panic attack ~ Nj is pretty nonverbal when he breaks down and gives into exhaustion/stress/panic

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

He sees the dark circles under Jk’s eyes, even when he tries to hide them under makeup. He’s always so anxious when they get close to a comeback, tossing and turning into the early hours of the morning. Nj can hear his restless movements through the thin walls of their dorm.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

And Nj /has/ to do it, really, because he’s the leader. It’s his job to be the one that sits in every meeting that could have been handled over email, and approves all the plans on behalf of the group, and keeps track of what members need to post what where, and when, and—

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

They know that he does /try/ to form the words, but they only bubble around in his throat, latched together in a daisy chain of razor blades and jumbled letters, aimed to slice him into a thousand pieces if he dares let them loose.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

How can he explain it, now, though? That he’s been pretending for so many years? That it’s not that he hates touch, he never has, it’s that he craves it too much? It’s that his reactions to even the smallest bits of affection are humiliating?

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

He can’t do it. No matter how much he burns to be held. For fuck’s sake, a simple hug can leave him dazed and pliant. It’s not…not normal. /Nj/ isn’t normal.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

He knows they would say yes in an instant. He knows they’d do anything he asked of them. It’s not hard to see the way they look at Nj like he hung the stars in the sky.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

“There, it’s okay,” Jm murmurs. “I’ve got you. Shh.” Nj wasn’t even aware that he’d been making noise until the younger boy drew attention to the soft whimpers coming from his mouth and muffling against Jm’s shoulder.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Jm’s fingers pause, then restart their soothing. At first Nj isn’t sure he understood, but then Jm closes the already small distance between them to kiss the top of Nj’s head.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

4 years

The smell, the rearranged furniture, the changed nest, the reason th wouldn’t tell the alphas what was happening. The reason jk is sweating buckets and looks about 3 seconds away from passing out. This is why. Jk is presenting, and he’s an omega.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

He knows that tomorrow, the loneliness will ache deeper, fuller, until it eats him alive. But right now, Jm’s heart beats steady against him, chest rising and falling in synchronicity with his, and Nj can’t find it in himself to care about anything but how nice it feels.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Nj blinks again, eyes fluttering as he tries to focus on Jm’s face. He’s so beautiful. Nj’s always thought so, but as Jm lies relaxed with his hair splayed messily across the pillow, smile tugging at his lips, it’s all Nj can think about.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

The endearment startles Nj a little bit. Jm normally saves his sugar-sweet pet names for Jk and Th, the members he babies all the time. Does he see Nj that way too, now? As someone to take care of?

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

He’s tired of pretending he doesn’t crave this every single day. He’s tired of the hurt looks that the boys think he doesn’t see when he redirects them from touching him. He’s tired of hugging himself at night like it could compare to the real thing. Nj lets himself give in.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

And it’s not like he’s complaining…at least not outwardly. Even when he feels like screaming that he already has too much to get done, he only ever gives a tight smile and an “of course I can help you” and his precious, precious time.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

So…worth it. Absolutely. It doesn’t mean it’s not the hardest thing Nj has ever done.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

~ minjoon, maybe some ot7 stuff later but I think it’ll probably be platonic ot7? ~ might have an nsfw scene in a later update, still undecided ~ dom vibes jm, sub vibes nj

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

They have a routine for those days. No one asks what’s wrong. They scoop extra food on his plate at dinner, and do the dishes even when it’s Nj’s turn, and Sj cracks more jokes than usual without needling him for reactions.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Even when he’s not okay, and his smiles don’t quite reach his eyes and he stares off into space a little too long at the dinner table and he’s painfully, painfully quiet, the others don’t ask.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

They must stand there for several minutes before Jm speaks again. “C’mon, sweetheart, let’s go. Come with me, now.”

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

4 years

Hs may be happy that he’s allowed in the pack room, but it doesn’t mean he’s happy about leaving the alphas alone out here. He’ll be very, very relieved when they can all be together once more.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Sometimes he considers asking the boys for help. One of them could easily show up in his place for one of his terribly long meetings, or check with staff to finalize practice schedules, or really, pick up any one of his other innumerable tasks.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Time quickly grows thin as Nj jumps in and out of awareness. He doesn’t even realize his eyes had been closed until they open again at the feeling of Jm’s hands stroking through his hair.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

4 years

Jk’s mind feels fuzzy, eyes glazed over. Everything just feels so, so hot, it’s like his blood is boiling under his skin. Lost in the presence of his alpha, he lets out a moan and jerks his hips against yg’s, hard. He’s met with dark, hungry eyes.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Nj nods sleepily, forcing himself to stay awake as he’s helped to his feet. He can’t help but grumble—he was so comfortable—but his protests are quieted as Jm tucks him close against his side. Nj is much bigger than Jm, so how can he fit so perfectly curled under his arm?

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Because they know that as much as Nj always seems to know exactly how to steer conversations, how to gently coax fears and insecurities out of the boys’ mouths like smooth exhalations of relief, asking him to talk through his own emotions feels impossible on the bad days.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Nj hums happily, breathing deep to drink up Jm’s scent. At first it’s only the cologne Jk gave him last month; Nj recognizes the sweet citrus. But below that is something different—pure Jm, rich and masculine in its fullness, but not overpowering.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

But every time he comes close to asking for help—every time he can feel himself wearing thin at the edges, fraying with every passing second and close to collapse, he sees it.

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Nj makes a face. That sounds like a lot of work. All he really wants is to roll into bed and hug Jm like a human teddy bear. “Okay, so that’s a no. Food is non-negotiable, I’ll fix you something.”

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ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

He didn’t notice before, but Jm is holding a stack of clothing he must have pulled from Nj’s drawers. Suddenly he feels a little stupid for crying, but a louder voice in his head says it doesn’t matter, as long as Jm doesn’t go anywhere.

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214

ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Jm smiles. “You must be exhausted. It’s time to rest, alright?” Nj nods sluggishly, then reaches out vaguely in Jm’s direction until he makes contact, tugging closer.

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214

ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

5 months

I am having Fun with this fest fic

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3

219

ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

The others could probably single out Jm’s scent in a room of hundreds, could identify his touch by the ridges and valleys of his fingerprints on their skin, could pick his EKG out of a lineup.

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216

ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

4 years

They settle in, the betas caring for their omegas with soft touches and quiet words. It’s obvious both boys are exhausted, having to deal with preheat by themselves. Hopefully, they’ll be able to get some rest in before the coming storm.

1

7

215

ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

… He… He wants to ask for more.

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215

ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

He doesn’t have high hopes. But he does have the boys, and they always do their best to help.

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216

ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Somehow, he desperately hopes it sticks. Jm’s pretty voice calling him sweetheart makes him warm from the inside out, all molten hot and mushy. Vulnerable. Moldable.

1

2

214

ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Jm hushes him. “I’m not leaving you, I promise. I just want to get us into the bathroom. You’re dripping all over the floor, honey, you’re soaking wet.”

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213

ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Nj doesn’t know why he does it. There’s no logical thought process behind it—he’s not thinking much in general right now—but for some reason it’s the only option his brain even thought of. Nj kneels on the floor in front of Jm.

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2

215

ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Besides, being the one his members turn to for help—the one they trust most, in some cases—is something irreplaceably valuable to Nj. Something he could never put into words the way he wants to, no matter how many times he’s lauded for his lyricism.

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215

ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

Just the thought of it makes Nj shiver. He shyly glances up at Jm, then away—shakes his head slightly. Jm blinks. “You want me to help?”

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213

ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

It’s his own damn fault, really. He’s the one who told them not to touch him, back in their debut days. He said that it made him uncomfortable. He gently pushed away their friendly hands when they forgot.

1

214

ani ⁷ (ao3: constellationary)

@sweetsubkoo

3 years

It’s both everything Nj has wanted for years and everything he can’t let himself have. He freezes, perfectly still in the younger boy’s arms. But then Jm starts gently tracing his fingers up and down, up and down the nape of his neck…and Nj is just /tired/.

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