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Paul Hayes Profile
Paul Hayes

@paulhayesman

9,396
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7,640
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4,708
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144,228
Statuses

founder of BeachhutPR cycling for the together academy from Paris to Nice

dublin
Joined September 2009
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
2 years
Friend in his 30’s has ten wedding invites this summer due to covid delays. It’s worse than getting a summons he says.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
7 years
Pure Harry Potter stuff in Kerry right now #Opheila wonder who laid that road?
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
5 years
Always let a car into or out of Harold’s cross hospice if passing. They are going through the big things in life and your position in traffic can wait. Saying this more to myself than anyone else
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
2 years
My auld fella is less than impressed with my choice of libation. Times change daddio. It’s mainly the price difference upsetting him I think.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
1 year
Son just asked me if four guards would eat for free here. Great to know that that expensive private education confers no advantage in life.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
5 years
‘‘Tis time for Martin Brennan to explain #brexitmehole cos the brits are at it again
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
5 years
And that’s the level of knowledge Oxford put into the Irish implications of brexit
@curtainqueen
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5 years
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
@1an_Higgins Went fat biking in far north Finland by mistake. Only alcohol was some black cough syrup type stuff. Over did it. Ended up getting lost the next day and accidentally cycling through a sensor on the Russian border triggering a response. In tank form.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
Well this is comedy gold ⁦ @TeelingWhiskey ⁩ feelings for Keelings from Teelings
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
3 years
Just got breathalysed by a lovely guard in rathmines. I almost cried with the novelty of the human interaction. Hope he is there for a while. I might go back again.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
3 years
Oh goody. The Easter break. I was really beginning to miss my kids after the two weeks schooling they got this year.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
3 years
It took a village but my Covid drinking bench and table is a thing of abject beauty. Oak from my friend. Leg from me da. Much like life. And yes this is from earlier and I’m two bottles in.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
1 year
Singapore is the size of louth and has 5m people. Ireland is empty not full.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
6 years
Ireland will not be found wanting in providing for our nearest neighbour during their upcoming famine. I’m sure
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
I made a stew. I have never made a stew. I am proud of my stew. There is Guinness and wine in my stew. Also corn. I don’t know how to make stew.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
My mother has sent me all of the out of date crisps and peanuts from the closed pub. Knowing I will eat them.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
6 years
On a point of public information cycling two abreast is not a ‘fuck you’ to motorists but rather an aide memoire to them that if you don’t have enough space to safely overtake two cyclists then you don’t have enough space to overtake a single cyclist. You’re welcome.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
5 years
Sweet fucking Jesus that’s powerful.
@nowthisimpact
NowThis Impact
5 years
Sandy Hook Promise has released this harrowing PSA in time for back-to-school
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
Kamala Harris drank me under the table one night in SF many moons ago. I have no further insights and will not be taking questions at this time.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
2 years
Bloody cyclists.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
2 years
Hey @IrishRugby we need an emergency unblocking. @KarlBrophy @piersmorgan
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
I managed to get everyone in an enclosed venue to put on their masks yesterday when I loudly said into my phone on entry ‘does anyone else in the ICU want a coffee, I will be back in 5’ public service broadcasting at its finest.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
Dad pints
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
Beyond reason to have cars forcing pedestrians into tighter spaces. Will just have us in longer lockdown. Pedestrianise the entire city centre now. Unless the plan is to destroy it
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
As the son and bother of a publican I accept what was announced to protect us all and so do they, even though it will be harder for them. But they better be looked after given they had to close from early days and are an important part of the fabric of society whenever we unpause
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
3 years
You’re not the target of a vast global conspiracy. You’re just lonely and need to feel part of something. Anything. Get a hobby and stop making a tit of yourself. You’re welcome.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
3 years
Merchants arch not being knocked and cobblestone not being closed. And yet marches. I’m beginning to see why gaslighting seems to work so easily in this place. We are properly fooked because people virtue signal rather than think critically or at least base their actions on facts
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
Got in the water for less than a nanosecond today. It burned. What is wrong with you people. What are you running away from with your daily dips. You fooking lunatics.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
3 years
Genius level lockdown innovation. I’m open to crowd funding or a seed round.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
1 month
Fuck it. It’s time for an IQ test or some kind of general knowledge round before you can run for election. I’m politically engaged and couldn’t risk voting beyond the main parties because you can’t tell the sane Indos from the raving ones.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
3 years
An actual full wedding happening at seapoint. Woohoo
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
1 year
First pint in a long while. Worth the wait. Cheers dad.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
8 months
Let’s keep this going until he can buy Mcgregors pub off the gobshite.
@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
8 months
Fundraiser by Paul Darcy : Buy Caio Benicio a pint
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
3 years
Attacked a fella last night outside my house for allowing his dog to poop and not clean it up. On closer inspection it was a weed not a poop. That’s how drunk I was. Tried to invite him in for drink. He reminded me about the pandemic. I had all the drink last night. Sorry fella
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
5 years
I have achieved middle aged escape velocity. Having done an extensive audit I now have no assholes in my personal or business life. It’s taken a good 3 years. I miss them sometimes.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
Joggers are like a mobile Cheltenham at this stage. Get in the road. You may lose a few martyrs but your overall herd numbers will maintain. Ya sweaty mouth spreader wee shites
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
Can’t drive so may as well hide in it
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
3 years
When talking about variants remember that is where the mutation was first identified. It wasn’t necessarily carried into the country directly by that nationality. Probably did a bit of transmission on the way in various melting pots and travel hubs so lay off foreign nationals
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
6 years
6 foxes down a Rathmines lane
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
The square in Thurles right now.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
2 years
@MFBJura I evolved my thinking before the next round
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
6 years
A thing wot I wrote. To make my mammy happy.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
6 years
I’m at the wildest active retirement meetup ever. #paulsimon
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
8 months
Reverse Stockholm syndrome is so rare to see in the wild.
@MaryLouMcDonald
Mary Lou McDonald
8 months
Very sad to hear of the sudden death of Ben Dunne. My thoughts are with his beloved family. He was a good man who cared about people. We will never see his likes again. Ar dheis De go raibh a anam dilis. #BenDunne
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
5 years
Congestion charges within the canals are the only way to solve this bullshit
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
Observations on daily walk with the kids. When we go on the road to avoid elderly people we get very fast very close passes from mainly trade vans. Need a 30km speed limit city wide. No one is in a hurry anymore. Also jostled by joggers but I will deal with those assholes my way
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
5 years
And just like that the streets are traffic free. #magictractors
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
5 years
One must pimp ones ride for the occasion.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
I have an idea
@nypost
New York Post
4 years
Anti-maskers forced to dig graves for COVID-19 victims in Indonesia
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
6 years
Well now, cover girl at long last
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
Even though they are just the figureheads of a nation of heroes I’m hugely reassured to have @LeoVaradkar @Paschald @simoncoveney @SimonHarrisTD at the tip of our spear. It turns out that in a crisis, technocrat leadership does actually kick populist leaderships’ ass.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
5 years
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
7 years
If we turn all the old railway lines beyond the main cities into bike paths we would steal a march on European tourism for a generation
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
6 months
I’m biased as I’ve known him a long while but RTÉ need to find a vehicle for shay byrne that isn’t the middle of the night. He brings joy in the morning.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
5 years
Going for lunch to a mates house tomorrow who happens to be the most influential chef/restauranteur in the country. What to bring? Can’t outbox him on food or drink. Thinking a bag of cans? Or a few scatter cushions
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
3 years
How the fuck am I gonna explain to my challenger bank client founder that next year it is his turn to have his app fail and then contribute 1m to a toy show fund. I guess that’s why he pays me the big bucks
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
2 years
Mammy stole me drink
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
3 years
The school whats app just went full jihad at 1030. I’m too old for this shit.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
5 years
This morning on Enniscrone beach I could have gone horse riding, surfing or even beach yoga. So walking for a breakfast roll feels like underachievement but we all need to start somewhere
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
5 years
Amazingly positive comments under an innocuous tweet from a politician. This is not the Twitter we are used to but goddamit it is the Twitter that Ireland needs today.
@simoncoveney
Simon Coveney
5 years
Early flight to London this morning - looking forward to meeting @michaelgove @JulianSmithUK and @Keir_Starmer today - a lot to talk about. #Ireland position will remain consistent #Brexit .
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Paul Hayes
3 years
The fact that the cabinet wasn’t vaccinated in tandem with frontline workers speaks to a fear of populism that doesn’t bode well for us long term. A pregnant justice minister having to run a vital department from isolation degrades our response nationally. Populist shysterism
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Paul Hayes
4 years
I’m drinking drambuie because my friend Turlough did. Gone two years next week. We would have had some craic in lockdown. He didn’t die wondering. Tried it all.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
1 year
Actually it help set taxpayers up by an unexpected €5,000,000,000 but hey Ho
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
You would think Nevada would be quicker at counting late at night.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
Always cycle two abreast. That’s it. That’s the whole message. Great way to meet new people if you aren’t cycling with a mate. Yes you feel like a weirdo. But you will be alive. Remember drivers drive two abreast at all times due to passenger seat so take the road. It is yours.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
3 years
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
5 years
Now this is lovely.
@unaminhkavanagh
🌻 Úna-Minh (is my first name not Úna) Chaomhánach
5 years
On the left, Dick Spring meeting me in @OMahonysBooks back in the nineties, on the right me signing my book for him last night in @KerryLibrary ! Dick played a very important part in my adoption writing a character reference for my mom! I will never forget his kindness.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
5 years
As a pioneer in e-scooting 5 years ago I am stiffened with pride to see all the young outlaws who are riding proud through the city today. Never surrender. Do it for us auld fellas.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
3 years
I feel seen at last
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
5 years
Winner winner chicken dinner
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
3 years
The lockdown isn’t policed, it is self administered, you can’t force people into it in a liberal democracy without buy in from the populace. Once the hospital curve is flattened and our elderly are vaccinated it is over. Talk of controlled summer quarantines are delusional.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
3 years
The Swiss alps of rathmines.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
5 years
When the trawler follows the thing. ⛴ @arcurn
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
Coach:where is your son. We need impact subs. Me:I sent him for coffee.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
1 year
Just another centrist rugby lovin, suv hatin, fat mamil, bloomsday wanker living his best life this Father’s Day.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
6 years
How can I be 45 and only learn this now?
@TechInsider
Insider Tech
6 years
The popular beer pour with little to no foam — is completely wrong
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Paul Hayes
4 years
Had to make a necessary journey for bad reasons this morning which ended up working out. Ended up having an unexpected distanced pint with my da on my birthday. That will do. That will do nicely.
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Paul Hayes
2 years
Ye are all bullies but daddy is happy now. I hope ye are happy. My true nature has been subverted. #pints
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
2 years
My auld fella is less than impressed with my choice of libation. Times change daddio. It’s mainly the price difference upsetting him I think.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
2 years
Ah fuck. Now I’m in bits. Thinking of my dad bravely going through the same.
@benphillips76
Ben Phillips
2 years
I don’t know who needs to hear this but Neil Diamond, who retired from performing five years ago because of Parkinsons, just had a Broadway show of him open and it at the opening night he did this
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
1 year
Guy moving his laptop away from me in Heathrow. Son I don’t even read my emails, da fuck I’m gonna read yours.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
5 years
The luas is full of amateurs today
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
2 years
I have no recollection of this at all but I’m feeling it today ⁦ @KarlBrophy ⁩ ⁦ @piersmorgan
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
Twitter feels like we may need to move to a new platform and not tell the crazy ones where we are going.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
5 years
First mammy selfie
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
Love me some peann lua action
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
Looks like google is down. Now is the window to live the life you have only dared to dream about.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
Has someone set up a site yet to buy holiday homes in EU from brexiteers
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
All Tipp people are heroes but he leads us all today.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
5 years
I want to thank @gardainfo and @OireachtasNews for making me feel like a leathered outlaw as I scoot the mean bikelanes of Dublin town. People used to pity me but now that they see I’m a dangerous renegade I’m getting some seriously sexy looks as I tootle by.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
2 years
Damn all this evidence. It negates my single lived experience and doesn’t take into account my feelings.
@IrishTimes
The Irish Times
2 years
Ireland now has the highest life expectancy at birth in Europe, with a two-year increase recorded over the last decade. Much of this has been achieved through fewer deaths from heart attacks, stroke and cancer. For more see . Graphs:CSO and Eurostat (3/3)
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
1 year
@eoinyk I can’t act surprised.
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
4 years
Fuck this. It’s not that bad yet.
@siobhansiobhan
Siobhan 🌻🇺🇦
4 years
I think @PresidentIRL should do a #stpatricksday broadcast for about 2 or 3 hours on @rte . He could recite poetry, tell us stories, tell traditional Irish stories. It would be calming and cheering. And he could include the lovely dogs. Everyone would join in.
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Paul Hayes
3 years
Cycling with half the billionaires in the country this morning. The nice half who pay Tax here. Not the other bollixes. So it really doesn’t help the fiscal Situation for the country when ya come up behind us in a diesel screaming about paying your road tax
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
3 years
I think more people should bring dogs to interviews. #rachaelblackmore
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
2 years
I’m a little biased but my brothers new place De Faoites over our family pub The Arch bar is a great addition to Thurles. Still can’t get a booking but I sneaked a peek @adriancummins @tippfood @campbellsuz @pathayes1947
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Paul Hayes
3 years
Methadone de nata for the Portuguese withdrawal. Could only find 18
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Paul Hayes
7 years
Arlene Fosters worst nightmare as @paddycosgrave dressed as an island fisherman drops in to negotiate the return of the six counties in return for a conference in London
@paddycosgrave
Paddy Cosgrave
7 years
Headed into No. 10 Downing Street. Anything I should ask?
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@paulhayesman
Paul Hayes
6 years
Is Savita the definition of a black swan event? An unpredictable tragic event that changes the trajectory of a nation. She deserves more than just a wall.
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