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@omwanaballer

9,059
Followers
531
Following
291
Media
63,839
Statuses

unfunny.

Kampala, Uganda
Joined December 2018
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
@omwanaballer
Begas
7 months
High school was crazy, VD would be on a Saturday and you find someone eating their last 2 KFC pieces at break time on Tuesday.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
10 months
@matovu_michael_ Ben 10 being called Ben Tennyson😂
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
Campus is funny, you’ll go out on a week day and the other person stays in to watch series but you’re the unserious one😂😂
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
But KFC should allow us to choose the pieces of chicken we want.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
The problem with Arsenal is the fans are more serious than the players 😂
@Afcsammmm
Sam
3 years
😭😭😭
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
At least campus doesn’t have universal exams, high school teachers would scare you😂. “You’re here sleeping do you know what time children in Seeta wake up??”
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@omwanaballer
Begas
2 years
High school was wild, we would play football for 4 straight hours.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
2 years
The chicken is on the rice.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
Trap fans always looking for the rarest track on an album and claim it’s their favorite.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 months
Ugandans ask for an evening plan at 10am. Like have you even attempted to work?
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 months
They even centered him so that you don’t make a mistake.
@AskTeamFetchai
Fetch.ai Support
3 months
Eliminate one number 10 forever ❤️
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
You're here tweeting about cuddles instead of closing your windows
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
Budo rugby players would have this for breakfast before a game just to come back praising Ngo players 😂
@tsekeselepe
Kakarot
3 years
Me walking to the boardroom for a meeting
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@omwanaballer
Begas
2 years
“But do they know how much school fees I pay”
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@omwanaballer
Begas
2 years
We should dedicate one day to discuss job opportunities on this app.
@4mbuhh
🐢
2 years
good dick is one thing 🥴🤤 but dam boy you’re a Licktrician too 🤯😳😩
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@omwanaballer
Begas
2 months
Thank you doctor. Even the ones from Capital Shoppers?
@drkasenene
Dr Kasenene
2 months
This is unhealthy food.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
You’re in a long distance relationship with someone celebrating lifting of curfew?? Kale.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
How are those kids going to tell their parents to pick them from jail?
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@omwanaballer
Begas
9 months
Azawi dropping a harder album than Drake is something I didn’t see coming.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
If parents knew how much this generation has normalized weed.💀
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@omwanaballer
Begas
2 years
Ateh don’t think you’ll also just beat people, Will is rich.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
That person you’re adding to your private story has one too. But you don’t know because... Anyway happy holidays
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
You got tired from just watching. And you think mansions are meant for you? 😂
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@omwanaballer
Begas
6 months
If we’re being honest “Lonely at the Top” was top 3 afrobeats songs this year.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
Guys reach hostel and think you just knock on girls’ rooms and get sex 😂
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@omwanaballer
Begas
6 months
Chopping classes to read the same book everyday>>>
@NostalgiaFolder
Nostalgia
6 months
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
NBA fans. This sleeping schedule will have us dead by 35😂
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
West Brom scoring a goal for every handsome man in Uganda.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
But did guys hear the commentator say “Rob Holding is the first player to score an own goal in this fixture since his manager in 2014”😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
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@omwanaballer
Begas
1 year
My son may not reach P2.
@SkySportsNews
Sky Sports News
1 year
BREAKING: PSG have accepted Al Hilal's £259m offer for Kylian Mbappe 🇸🇦✅
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@omwanaballer
Begas
6 months
Then he asks you for babes.
@Mattstevee
mandeth
6 months
The guy who used to be beat me to a pulp in school at the Budo league on Sundays:
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@omwanaballer
Begas
1 year
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@akreana_
Keabetswe🌬
1 year
When were your simpler times ?
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
Cheat before you’re cheated on.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
Guys are now feeling like Mikaelsons😂
@mkainerugaba
Muhoozi Kainerugaba
4 years
I told you my young brother, that you can NEVER intimidate us. We are much stronger than you can ever imagine to be. If you want to fight we will simply defeat you. We want peace! But if you attempt to fight us then Bring it on!
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@omwanaballer
Begas
5 years
“It’s my bestie’s birthweek and I don’t know how to act”
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@omwanaballer
Begas
5 years
Now that I’m starting to remember things. I might have given this jaj guy my wallet and told him to pick what makes his lineage happy.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
Uganda is a really small country but why don’t my friends ever win Chamuka keys
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@omwanaballer
Begas
2 months
Mbu you’ve chap
@vianaindi1
Viana Indi
2 months
Apologize like a real Ugandan 😂😂😂
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@omwanaballer
Begas
2 months
Man such leagues they’ll know you’re tying just by your slang.
@LegendsKla
Legends
2 months
Hi beautiful people 🤩 Get prepared for the #ISALeague kicking off at #LegendsGrounds this June. Don’t forget to turn on notifications for all the latest updates 🤗
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@omwanaballer
Begas
2 years
Morocco has won more spots for African countries?? The world won’t believe the haram that will hit it in 2026.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
Lewandowski actually scored 5 goals in 9 minutes. It still stresses me.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
Kale Banza’s parents sent him to Germany, he saw Bayern and was like ah ah Liverpool enkolera
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
Alcohol is not even sweet
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
I’m convinced the whole MUBS is averaging first class degrees, these guys can discuss.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
I miss flipping my pen throughout Physics exams.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
Btw stop being so good at fifa, no one will want to play you.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
You were excited when they told you that girl was in your hostel, now look at you watching Sheffield vs. Westbrom
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@omwanaballer
Begas
2 years
Guys that knew the most calculator tricks didn’t know math.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
I’m spoiling this girl when I get cash.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
Torrero looked directly into my eyes and told me “captain Bamford”😂
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
Whenever someone says “I’ve released alcohol” just know they’re getting worse.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
Arsenal is never going to meet this PSG team in a competitive game. Lucky bastards!
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@omwanaballer
Begas
2 years
The Budo league is the super bowl of Uganda. And you know you can’t refuse.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
Receiving the award for best student in the 5th stream.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
Lecturer: The papers are open book. Me whose books are in Nairobi:
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@omwanaballer
Begas
6 months
Kampala doesn’t make sense, you stretch and 100k has gone.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
2 months
Vault numbers fell so bad you can have a date there at 10pm on a Friday night.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
Prefects always felt so powerful after they hit wtih the “Do you know who you’re talking to?”😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
Today you can shoot your shot and tell them “April fools” when they’re becoming difficult.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
Mbu the party was called Last Drip😂I’m dyingggg
@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
How are those kids going to tell their parents to pick them from jail?
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@omwanaballer
Begas
5 years
Me on my way to do an economics paper after only reading price Theory and two extra graphs.
@AdamSB___
ÀDÄM
5 years
Bombooclaat
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
Guys thought you just book trophies
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@omwanaballer
Begas
5 years
*attends ShoNaLe* *Wakes up early for Cancer run* *preparing clothes for Blankets and wine* I don’t know what you’re chasing my friend but you’ll find it in the hospital on Monday morning 😂
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
+1🙏🏿❤️
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
You look at some homes and just know they don’t kill mosquitoes against the walls.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
I miss waking up with so much hate for myself after the decisions I made the previous night.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
My bestfriend and I hugging for an hour and everyone thinking we’re dating>>>>
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@omwanaballer
Begas
7 months
In uni I was just going out I don’t even know how it stresses y’all.
@danstaydipped
7 months
Uni is actually a test of mental strength.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
But guys tweeted nonsense yesterday.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
Martial puts on black gloves and feels like Henry. Aight Henry Danger.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
Being a known rugby player was nice until it was time for an away game.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
You can never win a war against alcohol btw, stop trying😂
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
Fabrizio’s tweets can be weak when your team isn’t signing.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
I really be on my phone a lot for someone with zero chats😂
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@omwanaballer
Begas
6 months
Reddington is getting you out through the main gate in broad daylight.
@TheLenny_
LENNY 👑
6 months
You’re in prison, who are you calling for help?
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
Autocorrect, I don’t think I’ll ever use the word “ducking” in my life. Just stop it man.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
Some days I view 5 statuses and close that chapter.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
“We’re sending the Indian back to Mumbai” okay Idi Amin.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
5 months
Single people are the most active. Talk about Strength in numbers.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
Kenjis is open. Kampala is about to run mad.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
Ugandans were looking for a reason to drink, Cheptegei gave them a reason to kill themselves.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
You can’t complete an assignment but the way you’re accepting challenges right now.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
Anti mwagala nyo house tour, abaana bajja balaga amayumba mutye. 😂
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
Friends that used to give out their Biscuits because they were aerated>>>>>
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
These people in my class tend to assume people’s marks according to how much they go out and that’s where they go wrong.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
2 months
Ugandans are hilarious 😂
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
David Luiz plays like those rugby players who played defense for their houses/classes when they had no other option in high school.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
2 months
With such tweets they’ll chase me from around Forest mall.
@omwanaballer
Begas
7 months
High school was crazy, VD would be on a Saturday and you find someone eating their last 2 KFC pieces at break time on Tuesday.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
1 year
Just remembered this teacher that gave me his phone and told me to call my mum and tell her I don’t want to study. What was that?😂
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@omwanaballer
Begas
2 years
I’ve been chased.
@omwanaballer
Begas
2 years
This girl is really changing me.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
Now you have a stomachache and can’t have sex just because you ate things you don’t know.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
Drinking with drunkards is actually expensive. Now why are you still sober after 3 bottles?
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
Kale God really knows where to place his people. Imagine I used to study in London, I would wake up on some days to move around stores just to collide with football stars...
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
This girl really used a knife 👐🏿
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
Okay now you used to fight to go for functions in high school to see those girls, you’re now in the same hostel. Plan ki?
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@omwanaballer
Begas
4 years
Some tweets be so intense we even fear liking😂
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@omwanaballer
Begas
3 years
Messi breaks records and his fans don’t even react. They’re tired.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
7 months
Being 84 in 1929 is insane.
@fasc1nate
Fascinating
7 months
John D. Rockefeller gifting a 5 cent coin to a child on his 84th birthday, 1929.
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@omwanaballer
Begas
9 months
Serving this amount of chips to a sober person in broad daylight is being too shameless.
@_heychef
Hey Chef!
9 months
Lunch is ready! Would you like to add anything?
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@omwanaballer
Begas
2 years
School leagues have become concerts 😂
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