Nick Wiger @nickwiger Twitter profile

Last Seen Profiles

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

They’re gonna blame the protests for COVID spikes instead of shit like this

Arash Markazi

@ArashMarkazi

4 years

Las Vegas is officially back.

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

The 4 types of adult 1. Alcoholic parent 2. IBS sufferer 3. Disney season pass holder 4. Facebook racist

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Guy Fieri hating eggs is a dazzling character detail. You couldn’t write it

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@nickwiger

5 years

I dunno, maybe the thing on the left should’ve mentioned the thing on the right?

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@nickwiger

4 years

Did I brew that?

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@nickwiger

5 years

lmao at the courtroom sketch of Weinstein's nudes

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Sorkin Zuckerberg: You know, you really don't need a forensics team to get to the bottom of this. If you guys were the inventors of Facebook, you'd have invented Facebook. IRL Zuckerberg: Guhhhh well I think lying is bad (gulp)

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

Later today the bang bus will be driving through lower Manhattan to salute frontline workers

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@nickwiger

5 years

Lol Bernie owns so much

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

6 years

Podcast listeners: When are you gonna come to [city]?? Also podcast listeners: Ugh another live episode

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

Potions should exist

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

Darth Vader is 39 in Star Wars

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Rise of Skywalker puts the image in your head of Emperor Palpatine hitting it raw

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

Ok just took a bath at home for the first time in my adult life. Relaxing but had some issues: - Cramped (obv) - Need pillow (?) for head - Bath salts underwhelming (didn’t use enough? Also I miss suds) - Unflattering meat splay Any tips to plus up a bath time experience?

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Rest of the league waiting for their turn to blow out the Warriors

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

6 years

No one deserved to be dunked on like this more than Chris Dudley, a shitty player with an ugly game who's IRL friends with Brett Kavanaugh

NBA on ESPN

@ESPNNBA

6 years

On This Date: In 1999, Shaq threw down one of the most disrespectful dunks in NBA history 😤

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Prayers for Howard Schultz who injured his back trying to suck himself off 🙏🙏🙏

Sahil Kapur

@sahilkapur

5 years

New letter from @HowardSchultz on his health and exploration of an independent presidential candidacy.

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

6 years

Ok I’m switching to defending her with my life

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

6 years

A sensible bedtime is a thoughtful gift for tomorrow you!

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Jesus now every commercial is some maudlin “we’re there for you” shit. Can we please bring back the Budweiser frogs

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Those soft grocery store cookies with the icing. I don't know what you call em but I know where they belong: my tum tum

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

“Dennis Rodman isn’t interesting” an instant S-tier Simmons take. Just tremendous shit. Like arguing Shaq isn’t big

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Benioff/Weiss admit they’d “never seen a TV show before” & their pitch doc consisted of a Subway napkin with text “dragon + titty”

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

First day working for the Buttigieg campaign. Every six minutes an alarm goes off & you have to stand & do the High Hopes dance. My pulse has stabilized at 150 bpm

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@nickwiger

6 years

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Computer simulation of Bloomberg 2020

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Diarrhea “rare”? I gotta get this thing

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

For the first time I'm happy I opened my DMs

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

Logging on to the bad website for the bad day

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Beto & Neil deGrasse Tyson saying fuck & shit means cussing is officially no longer edgy. The cool thing now is saying “what the frick” & “golly gee”

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

Who healed after Rodney King? Who healed after Eric Garner? It's the same open wound you decrepit feckless dipshit

This Week

@ThisWeekABC

4 years

NEW: Speaker Nancy Pelosi says a president of the United States “has the responsibility to heal,” quoting former President. George H. W. Bush following the Rodney King riots and Former President Barack Obama’s following the killing of Eric Garner.

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

It’s not like you have to be some genius philosopher king to start a business. I mean I’ve started a business. It’s called Doughboys Media. It’s a podcast where me & my friend call each other fat

Mike Bloomberg

@MikeBloomberg

5 years

Anyone?

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

What the fuck

Michael “Mookie” Blaiklock

@LILmookieB

5 years

Does anyone else remember this Fruity Pebbles Christmas commercial where, at the end, Fred Flintstone just starts chewing without ever putting the cereal in his mouth?? I‘ve thought about this for years.

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

@bobby Big endorsement for Bernie

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Fuck you #MayorCheat

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

I have a new theory. Here it is. “Every sauce is good”

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Complaining to a friend with no Switch about all the eggs during Bunny Day

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Wow, people already circulating a completely unfounded conspiracy theory that Epstein wasn’t murdered

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Another glass ceiling shattered

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Appreciate holiday inn giving guests a jack off sign

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

Most pets are incel

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

Just in time. Things almost got bad there for a sec

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

My fav part of the children’s game animal crossing is flying to an untouched tropical paradise to strip mine & deforest it before abandoning it forever

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

6 years

I love being a tremendously stupid dickhead. Just the dumbest of all fucks

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Vote blue no matter who

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

I am calling on Doughboys listeners to order take out Chinese food. This is someplace I know we can make a difference

Michelle Chai 蔡詠兒

@winyeemichelle

5 years

This is going to sound kinda mad, but this week, pls consider making your weekly takeout a Chinese takeaway. My family's businesses have all been impacted hugely by coronavirus panic 😭

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

@KevinTPorter @LAFoodBank Friend was a PA on her show, got their first staff writer job & put in notice, instead of “congrats!” was told to give their Christmas gift back

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

Checking my phone while riding a horse in a video game

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

Language constantly evolves, for instance hell yeah is now he’ll yeah

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

Nonspecific shorthand ordering in bars. "Gimme a beer." "Whiskey. Leave the bottle."

Ross Miller 🍿🎬

@rosstmiller

4 years

Friday film question: what's a tiny little detail from a movie, or trend in movies, that bugs the hell out of you? Not anything major, just specific.

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

[Full court lob alley oop into a 360 slam] Jeff Van Gundy: How come nobody smokes a pipe anymore?

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

I mean this is obviously corrupt but also imagine spending $1750 to watch a fuckin debate instead of building a high end gaming PC

DSA

@DemSocialists

5 years

Ever wonder if the audience at the #DemDebate might lean towards a particular candidate? Seats at this one cost $1,750 to $3,200.

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

The Coca Cola company is not happy with me--that's okay, I'll still keep drinking that garbage.

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

Doughboys is restarting production today against LA County rules. I will be in the studio with everyone else. If anyone is arrested, I ask that it only be Yusong.

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

6 years

Michelle Wife

Ryan Meharry

@realryanmeharry

6 years

My Lyft driver has his wife saved in his phone as “Michelle Wife”.

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Been a while since there was one of those insane hygiene posts everyone dunked on like “I have never once washed my socks” or “does anyone else sit side saddle on the toilet”

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

Just hanging like its after day two of dragon con

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

What can one even say

Eater

@Eater

4 years

McDonald’s to debut spicy chicken McNuggets, its first new U.S. flavor since 1983

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Jack raising $50K purely to spite hoarse wisperer is the most I've ever seen anyone be owned

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

Plus you know he’s farting in there

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Jonah Hill’s fake dick in Wolf of Wall Street is so lame. Show your real hog coward

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

@nickciarelli @Mike2020 This is fucked up. He finds out on twitter??

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Every other day some serious face avi tweets "Danger Democrats: go too far left & you'll lose voters like me" & when you check their bio it's always like "Former chief strategist for Dennis Hastert. Current private prison lobbyist"

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Animal Crossing right now is like early Twitter: the eggs are ruining everything!!

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Santa is uncircumcised

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@nickwiger

5 years

Packed a lunch but forgot it at home. Just a fuckin gutpunch

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@nickwiger

5 years

Eating a 1700 calorie salad at Cheesecake Factory

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Huge endorsement from some loser pretending to be Bill Murray

I Love You Maine.

@StayWonked

5 years

In 2016, I felt the Democratic Party and the country as a whole needed a change and I supported @BernieSanders in the democratic primary. On Tuesday, I’ll be casting my vote for @SenWarren as I feel she is the one Democrat that can unite our party and beat @realDonaldTrump .

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

“See now, Corn Pop ran with this bad dude named Sugar Bear. He was always telling folks he can’t get enough of that Golden Crisp”

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

🥧 PIE THREAD 🥧 What’s a pie you like? I’ll start: banana cream pie 😋 Positive vibes only. No hating on anyone’s preferred pies!!

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Apparently she’s reviewing chain restaurants?? This is fucked

Ryan Lizza

@RyanLizza

5 years

Some news: Hillary Clinton is starting her own podcast

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Just to be yet another person to make the same point re: this craven horseshit. My union came very close to striking in 2017 over whether the companies would fund our fucking healthcare. If that issue was off the table we'd have more leverage in contract negotiations

Pete Buttigieg

@PeteButtigieg

5 years

There are 14 million union workers in America who have fought hard for strong, employer-provided health benefits. Medicare for All Who Want It protects their plans and union members' freedom to choose the coverage that's best for them.

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

How come there wasn’t a Lenny Kravitz challenge where dudes tried to squat & rip open their pants to expose their full dick & balls

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Can’t believe Tom Nook really plans to lift the quarantine by Bunny Day

Polygon

@Polygon

5 years

Animal Crossing: New Horizons’ Bunny Day event detailed, and an old sloth friend returns

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

“So what’s Quincy like?”

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Fuck Dianne Feinstein

Igor Bobic

@igorbobic

5 years

Asked Feinstein yesterday about Trump's comments about homeless people in CA:

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Biden drops his boxers to weigh himself & chats nude for 45 minutes. Bloomberg dries his dick, balls, & asshole with the hand dryer & leaves 3 towels in a heap on the floor. Bernie changes efficiently facing the lockers. He’s not ashamed of his body he’s being respectful

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

6 years

My parents paid bribes to get me into UCB advanced study

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Gotta be a record amount of mild salsa

Jake Sherman

@JakeSherman

5 years

Massive bags of qdoba are being carried into the capitol.

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

Finally got around to reading the Marie Kondo book & it owns

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

I’m older and fatter than george costanza

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Beto’s official statement: “Listen up assholes, I’m dropping the fuck out to focus on jacking my dick”

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Joe Biden retire bitch

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Still can’t believe they went to the trouble of recreating this photo with no dick! The dick was the whole thing!

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Philanthropy is conscience laundering

The New York Times

@nytimes

5 years

Bill Gates has minimized his ties to Jeffrey Epstein. But a New York Times investigation shows that Gates and Epstein repeatedly spent time together after Epstein was a convicted sex offender.

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

Lotta dudes gonna give themselves huge power tools in cyberpunk. Me, I shall fashion a sleek, practical dick

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

NYT endorses both cum & pee for best fluid from a dick

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

Entirely consistent with the Hollywood open secret about Ellen: a nightmare to work for

Variety

@Variety

4 years

Crew members from Ellen DeGeneres’ long-running daytime talk show are distressed and outraged over their treatment from top producers amid the coronavirus pandemic

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

@TheDemocrats I did as you instructed & this was the image I got in reply??

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

@HillaryClinton This!!! 😂😂 Hey who invited Ghislaine Maxwell to Chelsea’s wedding

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Getting my $26 (with tip) haircut.

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

Well, here it is: I can finally announce I’ll be personally curating the hentai on HBO Max!

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

This is fucked

L.A. Times Food

@latimesfood

5 years

Since Costco began selling hot dogs in 1984, anyone could partake in the store’s fast-food deals — with or without an annual membership. That’s about to change.

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

What’s he shittin

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

5 years

The Sonic story is wild! They completely reworked the design of the title character based on fan reaction to a trailer! And people are happy with the result! This is unprecedented!

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger

4 years

These days I learn of the existence of a celeb when they collab with McDonald’s on a combo meal

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Nick Wiger

@nickwiger