Not how I imagined this day, but,
the day has come!
My name is Maya, a trans woman with rough hands and a soft heart, on HRT since November 24th, 2021.
This week, with help from my brother, I came out to my mom.
Mom reacted as I expected: worried, confused and shocked.
She told me I'm her child and she loves me regardless, and spent the week educating herself on trans identities. 💜
My social transition is now complete! ☺️
So much happened today: we are pregnant (unplanned, but desired), she says she is fine with me transitioning and being her wife and a mom, and that she thinks of me as a woman.
I'm shocked. I must be happy, but I don't know what to believe.
I started transitioning at 41 after decades of struggle. But still when GCs say we shouldn't leave gender to self-identification because any man can use that to enter women's spaces, I pause and ponder.
What's wrong with me?
It's official people, we landed on a name for me.
Maya is here.
Thank you for calling me Aida all this time. I liked being Aida, but she becomes Maya now.
If you still think gender dysphoria is a sickness, please start paying us life-long sickness benefits.
(You'll still be wrong, but we can use the money.)
As a trans woman I AM indeed, a biological woman. My brain is also part of my biology.
Limiting the biology of womanhood to reproductive organs and excluding the brain is perhaps the most explicit form of misogyny.
@jeremycarl4
News flash: a white dude DISCOVERS openly trans women have transition histories. The said dude is yet to learn the first things about trans identity.
I'm still in disbelief. Just a week ago my prospects of transitioning were grim, and now I need to prepare to be a mother and a wife. I'm worried it may all suddenly fall apart and leave me completely ruined.
Not how I imagined this day, but,
the day has come!
My name is Maya, a trans woman with rough hands and a soft heart, on HRT since November 24th, 2021.
Thank you everyone for your kindness. Nobody out there knows about any of this yet. You guys are my precious inner circle. Love you all and wish you all the power and support for being and becoming your authentic beautiful selves. 💜💗
Reminding the ignored obvious: Every trans person's transition path and goals are different and unique. I'm not sentenced to look or behave like some other trans person who is a very different character than I am. They are valid, and so am I.
It may be considered impolite by some, but I block followers who don't tweet at all. I'm here for the community we have, not to be watched for entertainment.
My wife was holding and talking to our newborn daughter today and pointed her to me and said: Look at mommy!
🥰🥰🥰🥰
Anyway, if you need me, I'll be in heaven for the rest of the day!
Since the beginning of my transition 8 months ago, I somehow feel like I've got the power to do tons of things that I couldn't do before, NON of them being gender-specific. I want to study new subjects, learn new skills and try different lines of work. Too bad I'm 41 already!
Within 20 mins in the dog park today, I learned that one of our friends, a medical doctor, has started a transgender clinic in our town and another friend, a nurse, is happy to see parents supporting trans kids early on.
What is the universe telling me?
Came out to our closest couple of friends. Both got shocked, and were supportive and respectful. She asked a lot of questions. He maybe asked one.
The day after, she's texting my wife, expressing sympathy and support! And I wonder: if my wife is a victim, what that makes me?
Being trans is the hard-wired obligation of being self-conscious about your gender, and thus your entire being, every day and every hour of your life. The pain is inevitable, and constantly present.
I feel like most people get their ideas about gender identity the way teenagers "learn" about sex from porn.
I'm working on a 20-second intro to the subject, for use on good people in my life who aren't trans-literate, and to whom I'll be coming out before the year ends.
I propose a trans tax:
If you're rocking any aspect of your transition, share your hard-earned know-how. I see way too many of you looking fantastic, and I know it took time and effort, and it's highly nontrivial, but I don't see a proportional amount of advice being shared.
Dear cis men, I tried for decades of my life and failed to disguise as one of you. Now please tell me: you never wished to have nice boobs and soft skin?
I was deeply religious till ~29, had my first drink at 30, went on my first date at 31, didn't even know about LGBT+ people till ~20 ....
Anyway, for all the misinformation I was fed, at 40 I'm proud to be out to myself at least. Happy Pride Month!
💜🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️
@zekedrinkswater
Every thing got better. OCD became manageable, confidence level went up, real-time reasoning power increased, tackling hard projects felt and proved to be possible.... AND I'M NOT EVEN SOCIALLY OUT YET!
Imagine you must pack overnight and leave your house, because other people are coming to destroy it and they kill you if you are home. Imagine the war, human's worst invention.
I used to despise pretty much everyone who dressed up, even if on occasions. I could not get the idea of feeling good about oneself, as I hated myself so much. I'm now only beginning to think like a normal person. Turns out the normal me is a woman.
I cannot respond to every kind reaction to the news of the start of my HRT.
But I just want to say how grateful I am to all of you unmet siblings who support me in my journey and I hope I can give back and spread a fraction of your goodness.
Thank you!
💜💙💚💛🧡❤️
I often find myself forgetting that by coming out to someone, I'm not asking for a favor. Rather, I'm giving them the privilege of knowing something very intimate about me. It's their flaw if they can't accept it, not mine.
When I finally get to attend my first Pride, I'll tear up like a sentimental bitch. For most of my life I was fighting me, the real female me. I was carrying and maintaining an ugly shell over something good and real. I have a lot of crying to do and I will cry.
I still use male bathrooms and don't correct people when they 'sir' me, while inside I'm dying to be perceived as a normal woman. As if half a life hasn't been proof enough to myself that my dysphoria is real.
Please don't call them "gender critics". Don't legitimize them, don't sanitize them. They're transphobic people, and they don't have half a brain to criticize rationally.
Spironolactone prescribed!
I was almost disappointed at how easy it was.
I'm raged that I have to wait for at least another month for fertility preservation before I can take the first pill.
My testosterone level is in cis female range now.
Estrogen level is close to cis female range, after only 7 weeks of being on patches. Doctor just doubled the estrogen dosage.
Experiencing nipular goosebumps rn!
13 days on spiro: The morning thingy is gone, but also my distaste towards manhood has largely diminished.
I feel like I stepped out of the prison, looked at it from outside and suddenly it looks ok!
Welp!
The odd thing about the lovely partner who chose you as cis and straight and now accepts you as trans, is that they now have to identify as gay. Hard to know where to begin the conversations on this.
8 months on HRT now, six months of which with estradiol patches.
Long way ahead till full social transition, plus other things that life keeps throwing at you, BUT, I've never felt happier in my adult life.
Not how I imagined this day, but,
the day has come!
My name is Maya, a trans woman with rough hands and a soft heart, on HRT since November 24th, 2021.
Thinking about all Ukrainians and the anti-Putin Russians tonight. Hoping for some miracle to minimise the atrocities. Nothing, absolutely nothing, is more terrible than war.
I never quite agreed to use TERF as a self-consistent concept.
If you exclude trans women, you are NOT a feminist. Transphobia is essentially a form of patriarchy, the most cowardly form, which targets the most vulnerable women.
@TheLetterTen
That transition is fast and it starts with surgeries. It caused me great pain to make my partner understand that the truth is the exact opposite.
I love women, and I love being loved as a woman, and I don't even understand how anyone else won't want both of these, and that's how I know I'm a trans lesbian.
Reminder: I'm transitioning to be better to myself and to others. I'm transitioning because my life matters too, and I want it to make the most of it.
I transition because I'm a responsible human and recognize my true self is a woman. I'm not apologizing for that.
I've been called "dad"several times over the last few days, and it didn't make me feel anything. Am I really trans? Let's see: after witnessing the hardships of labor, do I still wish that I could get pregnant and give birth?
YES!
I'm not out, but,
we visited our midwives' clinic today and I notice trans flags in every room, and in different formats. Still wondering if I should have brought up the topic...
@genericeddie
Your cringe and hateful response is just a testament to genuineness of my identity. My very being is potent enough to trigger you. I hope you get the help you need. 💜
I'm scared of becoming an old woman without having ever been a younger woman. I'm not scared of aging as a woman. Just need the freedom to be the woman I am.
A friendly reminder to unfriendly transphobes that "transgender" is an adjective; "transgendered" is a wrong word to refer to a trans person.
YOU can be transgendered, if a trans person does you, but you wish!
I stared in the mirror for a couple of minutes today after shower and wondered if transition is right for me. I couldn't see how to carve a woman out of what was in the mirror. I'm mostly over it now, but such moments do occur.
I could never get these many followers in my cis-presenting life, not with my personal stuff, and nor with my professional stuff.
I'm here to make friends, to express myself and to learn from others. I guess being myself is paying off.
Thank you all! 💜
Spiro dose increased to 200 mg/day.
Estradiol patch prescribed.
Inducing lactation with domperidone was discussed and will be considered. I may get to nurse my baby!
Overwhelmed. Crying.
It's a unique form of loneliness when you cannot share your joy with your immediate family.
My testosterone-induced hair loss began very early, when I was in high school. For the past 10+ years my coping mechanism consisted of shaving my head and denying how much dysphoria it gave me. I still shave my head, but won't lie to myself anymore. I wish I had full hair.
A couple of lovely friends to whom I'm out, just invited us to their wedding in July. Must mention that the bride's sister is also trans.
I feel like a very real and necessary deadline is suddenly imposed on me.
I've said this before, but I feel like emphasizing it: HRT did NOT solve all my mental/emotional problems. But it made them much clearer to me, so I could start working on them with crisp vision. I don't think one can ask for more help than that in life.
2+ years into pandemic and all* movies and shows in production still picture "normal" conditions, as if these two years didn't and won't count in human history.
* all that I know of
I too, was exposed to the Harry Potter franchise in my younger years, and found it boring and underwhelming.
Now, sure, JK Rowling is a transphobic fascist, but I also blame the poor taste of the public that made her rich and gave her an underserved platform.
Update: I came out to my gender therapist neighbor today. They were very kind and supportive and referred me to another therapist. I emailed the admin to book the first appointment.
Turns out most of the barriers are inside me, not out there. Thank you all. 💜🏳️⚧️
Diversity is a process, not a state. It's an ongoing commitment to learning, discovering and growing. It implies a humble admission to blurriness of our vision, and a continuous attempt to refine it.
Dysphoria always came back, no matter how hardly I repressed, no matter how many times I purged, ...
Transition isn't easy, but I think it will be the easier path, everything considered.
I'm realizing that for 2.5 decades a lot of my feminine energy has been directed to sexuality, as it was the closest available channel to womanhood, and that then led to disappointment and shame.
Can't wait to see what HRT will do to that, but knowing it is already helping.