Yesterday my coworkers were roasting each other but all they had to say to me was that I was built like sailor moon and I think I have reached peak performance now
Today my high ass went to my friends and buzzed their apartment doorbell like 50 times and then realized I was in the wrong building and the apartment I was buzzing happened to be a girl I went to high school with lmao
Thinking about the fact that my school had an EMO DAY for spirit week and all the little preppy girls would wear black lipstick and be like 😜✌🏽 like it’s a costume lmao
A couple days ago I woke up to hearing my roommate talking shit about me and started to feel bad but then I remembered that I once saw this man eat 5 cans of chef boyardee in one sitting.
When I was 15 I had a Twitter account that basically just had videos of me being wayyy too high. I had a video of me fucking VACUUMING THE WALL and I will never live that down.
Tinder has a dice roll button to automate bland conversation openers and shitty pick up lines ??
Like bro the app is literally already low effort as it is
sometimes a fan account for some celebrity that i don’t know follows me, and i always think it’s actually person in the pictures cause they just be lookin like a regular guy lmfao
@MarniUhrig
BRO so many of them don’t even do anything interesting so it makes it so obvious they’re just trying to use their following as a high ground, like homie we don’t even have anything in common lmao