keta @keta_mean_ Twitter profile

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

i’m holding you tight. i know you can’t see me, but i hope you feel warm & loved.

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

ah yes, the real five love languages: - touch starved -my parents never said they were proud of me - i love Things - i’m so exhausted by life pls let me rest for 5 mins - hey pay attention to me

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

i'm so annoyed that 'vermilion' is a shade of red. it's obviously meant to be a shade a green. english frustrates me and no i will not explain.

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keta

@keta_mean_

3 months

it’s honestly mindblowing just how much taking care of yourself as an adult is simply learning to eat at home and going on walks

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keta

@keta_mean_

5 months

"of course i remember" is such a soft phrase filled with so much love

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keta

@keta_mean_

3 months

working theory that men have an easier time opening jars mostly because they don’t moisturize properly

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

practically every other mammal hides & sleeps through the winter while Man in all their wisdom and pomposity decided to uphold summer productivity standards — and now if I, the mammal that I am, fall short - it’s deemed season affective disorder

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keta

@keta_mean_

1 year

millennials will never outgrow posting song lyrics as cryptic emotional status updates

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keta

@keta_mean_

8 months

the notion of “wasted time” makes no sense when you accept that the abstraction of time is just the medium in which our lives unfold - for us to experience as is - and not a resource from which to constantly extract value

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

“i can fix him” “i can make him worse”// okay stop that, i’m trying to study him and your interference is tampering with my data

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keta

@keta_mean_

4 months

not naming any names but some of you are ceaselessly kind, profoundly thoughtful, and exceptionally radiant ~ sharing this sliver of time and space with you is such a joy

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keta

@keta_mean_

3 months

read somewhere that itsy bitsy spider is just sisyphus for toddlers and i’m so charmed

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keta

@keta_mean_

1 year

a girl really will shoot her shot by featuring you in her little pre-bedtime dream scenario fantasies

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keta

@keta_mean_

8 months

this feels like an indictment on a shifting nature of friendship and social circle dynamics…. i care less about the absolute numbers but there must be a more insidious reason for why more people aren’t being introduced through mutual connections

Sulla

@ichthys30

8 months

This is catastrophic

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keta

@keta_mean_

5 months

“i’ll figure it out” - the soft war cry of girl scared shitless behind a stoic face and layers of delusions of competence

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

the ideal body type is celestial

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

why are you not romanticizing the mundane things? why are you not cooking with ambience lighting & beverages? cleaning with a soundtrack & dance? answering emails with scented candles on the desk & jazz? why are you not creating pockets of luxury?

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keta

@keta_mean_

1 year

raw sexual magnetism of someone who does what they say they will do

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keta

@keta_mean_

1 year

> spotted him at the bar > fixed his collar > said “oh you’ve got no one to do this for you?” > seven mins later he asked me out it’s not hard friends

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keta

@keta_mean_

6 months

a college professor once said to me, "just because your brain thinks something, and you know you're very smart, does not mean it's true" i remember him daily.

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

the “hmm he’s kinda strange” to “fuck I’m in love” speed tunnel

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

mama didn’t raise a quitter, she raised a burnt out perfectionist who is sometimes bludgeoned into settling for mediocrity

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keta

@keta_mean_

1 year

not naming any names but some of you are genuinely lovely people & i hope the world shows you all nothing but kindness

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keta

@keta_mean_

5 months

that man who believes he can caramelize onions in 5 minutes is not going to provide for you

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keta

@keta_mean_

1 year

i cannot emphasize enough the mental health benefits of abandoning the idea that you're special

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keta

@keta_mean_

5 months

how do you say “i swear i’m not a complete imbecile my brain is just fried” in professional speak?

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keta

@keta_mean_

1 year

my overall wellbeing skyrocketed once i surrendered the notion that i had a singular all-encompassing calling to faithfully pursue & accepted that i just want to do stuff that i find fun and interesting and meaningful until i die

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

honestly, i respect the moon’s unwillingness to be suitably photographed on a phone

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

men love to offer help in the kitchen & then do nothing but stand directly in front of the cabinets and drawers you need to open

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keta

@keta_mean_

8 months

this is actually a really good fallback when genuine positivity seems out of reach

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keta

@keta_mean_

1 year

your version of flirting really is looking at someone you find attractive multiple times & praying they’re braver than you isn’t it

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keta

@keta_mean_

7 months

spending your time cultivating deep meaningful relationships with people you love and admire is probably the best way to both find your partner and become the best possible version of one yourself

michelle (sorta still on break) 🎢

@MichelleAkin

7 months

maybe ppl take dating too seriously and friendships not serious enough? 🤔

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keta

@keta_mean_

1 year

@skooookum feminine urge to be subjugated to the so-called cuteness aggression

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keta

@keta_mean_

7 months

no exaggeration - this is the key. to the whole thing. to everything. this is it.

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keta

@keta_mean_

1 year

there’s actually a ton you can get in life if you could just momentarily subject yourself to the mortifying ordeal of asking for it

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keta

@keta_mean_

8 months

@micropresident unironically, yes

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keta

@keta_mean_

6 months

perhaps try cosplaying as someone who believes it will all work out and maybe even better than you imagine, and you are fully equipped to do that thing and even do it well, and people can be good and maybe even kind to you - could be a fun little experiment!

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

me after sitting in the sun for ten minutes: love is real

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

native english speakers may never appreciate the flutter of emotion i experienced when i learned that one of the most vulnerable areas on the side of the forehead, one of the best spots to be kissed and caressed, is called ~temple

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keta

@keta_mean_

5 months

crazy that you can actually just make your dreams come true

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

i love men, i am half man myself on my dad’s side

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

are men privy to the power they hold when they wrap their arms around a woman’s waist from behind

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

no one flirts better than a girl who is not interested in the guy in the slightest

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

@djmicrobeads it’s freaking wild to me that we expect our bodies to function the same when the sun sets at 3:30pm and the skies are grey and my hands are always cold

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keta

@keta_mean_

9 months

fun to remember how someone somewhere had the best day of their life today. someone met the love of their life. someone got their dream job. someone held their baby for the first time. it's someone's best day today. guess what? tomorrow it could be your best day so keep going

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keta

@keta_mean_

6 months

the real antidote to imposter syndrome is learning how to cuddle with the reality that we are all well-intentioned little fraudsters in one way or another

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keta

@keta_mean_

1 year

anyone else upset about the fact that ‘grind’ used to mean skillfully rubbing one’s [fully clothed] butt on someone else’s [fully clothed] crotch at the club to low by flo rida & now it means toil away to earn advanced degrees and/or pay rent

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 months

it would do us well to on some level collectively internalize that our bodies are much better equipped to handle scarcity over abundance

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

perhaps you stay up so late because you fear the start of the new day? perhaps you feel the morning sun demands so much of you?

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keta

@keta_mean_

8 months

to be clear, this has little to do with free will vs determinism — it’s a recognition that centering yourself in the present, internalizing that now is all you have and all you are, is probably the the single best way to actually extract value from your time

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keta

@keta_mean_

4 months

sending this to him pray for me

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keta

@keta_mean_

8 months

the key to genuine humility is internalizing the fact that a lot of your perceived skill and advantage is somehow rooted in randomness, luck, and happy accidents

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keta

@keta_mean_

5 months

one of my more troublesome load-bearing beliefs is that with the right amount of delusion and audacity, there is nothing i cannot conquer

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keta

@keta_mean_

1 year

no sexier skill than effortlessly artfully cleaning as you go

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

compliment recklessly! say all the nice things that pop into your head! you have better things to spend your faculties on than filtering the instinct to be kind!

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keta

@keta_mean_

8 months

i think the majority of people open and close dating apps like they do a fridge when they’re more bored than hungry

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

might fuck around and accept the things i cannot change

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

so much of being a functional adult is just a) not panicking, b) not taking things too personally, and c) not letting the resentful monster in your mind tell you what to do and yet, brains love doing these things by default :)

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keta

@keta_mean_

10 months

the european mind cannot compreh—

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keta

@keta_mean_

5 months

i think it would be cool to hear a little ding when our frontal cortex is done developing

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keta

@keta_mean_

8 months

@cmkourtu this is interesting because it doesn’t seem to map very well onto my experience or the stories many of my female friends share with me about their experiences dating online…

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

never underestimate how much cleaning your space will unfuck your head

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keta

@keta_mean_

10 months

the fifth shot of espresso i sent down to see why the first four aren’t doing their bloody job

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keta

@keta_mean_

1 year

as far as hetero relationship dynamics go — being mummy-zoned by a guy is so much worse than being friend-zoned by a woman and it’s not even close

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keta

@keta_mean_

11 months

nothing tests a healthcare worker's professional resolve quite like having a maddeningly attractive patient. i must unbotton your shirt to see the surgical scar i must feel your neck for lymphnodes i must lay my hands on your stomach i must look directly into your eyes i must

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

women will carry unquantifiable primordial rage and still go about their day with all the tenderness of normalcy and i think that’s quite sexy of us actually

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keta

@keta_mean_

7 months

rumour has it next year is going to be pretty great - eavesdrop a little on the universe and you’ll hear it too i promise

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keta

@keta_mean_

3 months

“can’t romanticize an arranged marriage? skill issue.” - the grandparents c.1967

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

eyes of body dysmorphia particularly sting when you look at old photos and realize you were beautiful

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keta

@keta_mean_

8 months

the people by whom i am most charmed see life from a perspective grounded in the beauty of simultaneously being cosmically insignificant and presently remarkable

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

the little clown car that shuttles you from “innocent fun flirting” to “impatiently waiting for their name to pop up on your phone”

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keta

@keta_mean_

1 year

@babarganesh not exactly my style but i respect the hustle

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keta

@keta_mean_

3 months

finally

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keta

@keta_mean_

8 months

@goblinodds ideal dating apps looking more and more similar to the 'arranged' marriage process

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

2023 is the year i find stable dependable honest warm romantic love i mean it

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keta

@keta_mean_

1 year

shame on us for ever grumbling about the rain. the ocean travels all this way to give us little kisses and we treat her with disrespect???

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keta

@keta_mean_

3 months

men have their knickers in a twist unable to untangle the notion of “finding someone attractive” from “actively pursuing an interest”

taco belle

@animalologist

3 months

I feel I should inform you all that the girlies occasionally talk about which of our male friends are hot, and why, and we tend to mostly agree — and the deciding factor is basically never looks. It’s always about their personality, and how they carry themselves

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

physically it’s deleting a tweet with low engagement; mentally it’s executing a jester who has failed to entertain the court like a medieval monarch

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keta

@keta_mean_

1 year

accepting happily that some people will think of you as a little stupid is good. recognizing that you are in fact a little stupid is even better. we orient around communities to take care of one another partly because we’re all a little stupid. it’s okay.

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keta

@keta_mean_

1 year

it’s true that the greatest weapon against nihilism & existential despair is grinning stupidly at the sun, singing horrendously off-key with new friends, dancing sloppily under the moonlight

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keta

@keta_mean_

3 months

problem solving in the real world has less to do with intelligence and far more to do with composure and a wide network. i get so much mileage out of just not letting a crisis affect my demeanor, even more from knowing someone to call. brains without self-command and support are

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keta

@keta_mean_

7 months

few years ago i bought everyone in the office a flower to accompany a handwritten note only because I wanted the cover to give my crush a letter. fake romantics will find any reason not to bring their delusions to fruition. reality is not getting in the way, you are.

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keta

@keta_mean_

3 years

if she says it’s the perfect size, she likes you and it’s small

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keta

@keta_mean_

8 months

@cxgonzalez ya i see that. it feels chicken-egg-like, and throwing us into a self perpetuating downward spiral (wow i sound really pessimistic)

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

growing up, I was actively discouraged from saying “I’m bad at x” in any context. it was quickly replaced with “I haven’t had enough practice in x.” god, the difference it made — idk if you know, but I can do anything if I put in time in

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keta

@keta_mean_

7 months

hey you yes you i noticed your breaths are a little shallow and your jaw is tight take a deep breath that thing you planned? that thing you hoped for? it’s okay that it’s taking longer than you thought

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keta

@keta_mean_

7 months

to practice choosing to make the unwanted wanted — to me this is the key to developing resilience in its purest form

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

i actually think eldest daughters should be afforded one (1) instance in their whole lives to just completely lose their shit

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

you know when someone rests their head on your shoulder or chest & suddenly you watch your breaths because you don’t want any movement to disrupt their comfort; you know those silly silent gestures that carry a whole world of love—

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

wait when did you realize that the “why did the chicken cross the road?” “to get to the other side” joke was actually a pun on the poor little chicken dying and ‘going to the other side’...

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

vegan does not equal cruelty free. i know this because i’ve dated a number of them.

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

men, in general how comfortable do you feel with deciphering if a woman is flirting with you?

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

the hetero dating space would be significantly less frustrating for all parties involved if more women felt comfortable making first moves

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

dating apps are shitty for many reasons, chief of which is they, by virtue of design, force you to adopt the loathsome mindset of the archetype mean girl who frivolously passes sweeping character judgements on whole people based on paltry criteria. i hate who i become on them.

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keta

@keta_mean_

5 months

surprised once again to learn that closeness cannot be reached at a safe distance, my love?

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keta

@keta_mean_

5 months

one of the more pernicious narratives we can tell ourselves is life, in this moment, should be other than it is

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keta

@keta_mean_

8 months

women will use “babe” platonically and “bro” romantically, and yes it does make perfect sense

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keta

@keta_mean_

8 months

i am also not saying suffering is Good or desirable, but within it one can find meaning from which to derive value

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

@thebestestpie ridiculous

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keta

@keta_mean_

2 years

today I sealed a body bag on a man younger than me, who was likely perfectly healthy when he ate his breakfast. I am processing, but I don’t think I’ll ever be able to properly verbalize how heavy that zipper was to pull.

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