Why do families submit recent photos of their dead elderly for obituaries rather than ones of them at their hottest? I WANT MY MOURNERS TO SEE ME AT MY SEXUAL PEAK AND BE FILLED WITH HORNY REGRET.
WRITERZ, pls pls pls I beg of you, do not follow up on your query by telling me how "timely" and "important" your book is in the wake of last week's coup attempt. Read the room?
Today’s publishing conglomerates have less patience in building careers, leaving many writers with a shorter runway to “make it.” Imagine if Graywolf hadn’t stepped in to publish Percival Everett.
what are peoples thoughts on why fiction writers are producing so much less work than in the past, say up into the 80s but moreso w/r/t the writers of the early part of the 20th c. for the most part we dont have major writers who publish 10, 15, 20+ books anymore.
File under FUCK THAT: a major online publication solicited work from a client. I asked how much $$ was being offered and was told they'd be paid in "exposure."
In late 2021 I “graduated” from therapy after 17 years with the same therapist. I found out that she died earlier this year, and it’s hitting hard. Thanks for listening, Liz.
On occasion I am misgendered when I speak over the phone, which irritates me, except for that time in 1999 when Samuel R. Delany confused me for his lady friend Carol. I’d never been greeted so warmly! CAROL, YOU ARE CHERISHED.
Was strutting my way thru the Meatpacking District (BARF!) where a ghoulish tourist said to her equally ghoulish family, “Let ‘em honk and yell all they want; it’s not over.” I said, “YES IT’S OVER, WE WON, BITCH!” and then enjoyed an iced coffee.
FACT: many many many books open to these numbers or fewer. Your faces would slough off if you saw the sales figs of what’s considered “buzzy” or “bestselling.”
I come from a law-enforcement family. My father was a highway patrolman. My twin sister was a deputy sheriff. My little brother worked in a motorcycle unit and was killed on the job in 2015. TLDR: I fully support defunding the police.
It took a text from my father-in-law to remind both my husband and me that today is our wedding anniversary. Pandemic living in our crumbling republic continues apace!
@tomisbooked
@mariskreizman
BITCH, PLEASE. You're the garbage-monster "agent" who
almost inflicted Milo Yiannopoulos on us. Stop pretending he or Candace Owens (congrats on that diarrhea of a deal, BTW) actually add to our cultural discourse. They're shameless narcissists and provocateurs, nothing more.
Vetting a US or UK publishing contract involves reviewing the Territory Schedule (the countries where a publisher may distribute their editions). It’s straight-up an itemized list of each nation’s centuries-long campaign of bloody colonialist expansion. Anyway, back to DocuSign!!
If SCOTUS overturns Roe v. Wade, I will spend my future summer vacations driving women across state lines or into Canada for abortion services or hiring fancy Hummer limos with jacuzzis to take them to the one Planned Parenthood left in Berkeley. UNDER MY GAY EYE!
While eating lunch on day 83,691 of quarantine, I got salad dressing on my fingers, and instead of getting up to grab a napkin, I wiped my fingers IN MY HAIR.
Young job seekers need multiple internships under their belts to be srsly considered. Imagine having to work a year (or more!) for free for the prize of $30K. The bar to entry is intentionally high. Let’s snap it in half.
the recent conversation about disparity in book publishing is a start. but i need, again, to point out the obvious: unless internships and entry level positions are endowed, or salaries are significantly raised, people without safety nets/family money CANNOT AFFORD TO WORK.
I ain’t no Emily Post, but authors who follow up a query with an email update listing all the agents who requested a full ms in an attempt to trigger my (nonexistent) FOMO are TACKY AF. If twelve agents are reading already, you don’t need me for nuthin’.
Well, yes!
After 5 incredible, formative years at J&N, I’ve moved to Neon Literary. So thrilled to be joining this fantastic new agency with some very cool people :)
Why are we throwing outrage turds at students for not following social distancing rules? My god, they don’t even have fully formed frontal lobes. This is on the colleges and universities too busy cashing tuition checks to COVID-proof a lecture hall.
We are at a critical juncture at Lambda Literary. To lose this absolutely vital institution whose impassioned work has lifted up our queer lit community for decades would be a goddamned shame. OLD GAY DAD NEEDS YOU!
Given the unchecked conglomeration of the book business over the past fifty years—what once was dozens of publishers likely becoming four by end of year—this may be our last chance to unionize.
Good morning 🌞 I wrote a memoir (pub 7/12) and now we have galleys! ❤️
@doubledaybooks
I can’t wait for you to read this story about accidents, temporary amnesia, women who appear in two places at once, Colombian curanderos, and life in migration
over the moon to share that my debut novel, THE DISAPPOINTMENT, will be published by the wonderful
@CatapultStory
. a lifelong dream made real by
@alicia_kroell
and
@kentdwolf
. I can’t wait to take you all on this queer and absurd trip to the oregon coast 🤍
The conglomeration of the book industry has been going on for at least fifty years. Those old imprints at the big houses—Putnam, Dutton, FSG, Crown, Scribner, Ballantine, Ecco—were absorbed in the ‘70s, ‘80s, and ‘90s. HISTORY IS (UN)FUN.
me: “Dear ____, thank you for reaching out, but ____ is closed to endorsement requests. However, we both wish you all the best….”
also me: “Dear _____, you’re no doubt deluged with blurb asks, but I’m hoping you might have the bandwidth….”
Get me off this ride pls.
I have cut up to 20K words from full manuscripts through line editing alone. One pass through a novel in need of my love can take 100+ hours. TRUE STORY.
writer tip! if editors tell you to cut something—whether a line or paragraph or page—it doesn't always mean it's bad! we're often cutting for pace, clarity, etc., so save them in another doc for use later/elsewhere (what i like to call "send your darlings to finishing school")
From the “Dodged a Bullet” file: back in 2008 dude offered me a job but rescinded his offer the next day because I hadn’t shown sufficient excitement in the moments after receiving said offer. I still have the email! ALWAYS 👏 BE 👏 CLOSING!
Tomorrow morning I’ll be seeing your pixelated faces
@Tin_House
Summer Workshoppers! Please be dressed with equal parts whimsy and indifference. Hair optional.
#THSW
Want to see mainstream notions of gender, sex, and kink get rail-fucked to oblivion through the eyes of literature's first great cuckold? Read DARRYL, by
@jackie_ess
, which
@torreypeters
calls "The Pilgrim's Progress refracted by queer internet culture."
THIS OLD GAY DAD NEEDS A PAIR OF PROGRESSIVES BUT THAT DIDN’T STOP HIM FROM READING THIS REVIEW OF
@wordscience
BY
@parul_sehgal
1,000,000,000,000 X.
A lifetime ago when I worked in-house, a rarefied editor declared that the debut novel she acquired featured an "authentic blue-collar voice." I AM STILL LAUGHING.
HOT TIP: If my professional correspondence does not feature at least one joke, an overabundance of exclamation points, and strategic ALL CAPS, you're communicating with the scammer!!!
A note on "most anticipated" lists:
WRITERZ, scoring a mention is a lovely thing, but for those of you who've yet to find your 2002 book featured, don't fear. These lists don't drive preorders nor are they accurate predictors of success.
tldr: lists are fun but mean zip
whenever someone asks me what it is like to have
@kentdwolf
as an agent, i lovingly say "that man is my pitbull. he is an icon. he is incredible." and inevitably, months later, that same person will text me & say "that man is my pitbull, sarah. he is an icon. he is incredible."
No filter can adequately communicate the intense, visceral, completely Amber Sparks-y neon pink of this beautiful collection hot off the press. 2/11/2020.
#AIDNFY
✨