Cannot get over the fact that I am a member of the only generation that will ever experience the eight year window when the internet both contained pretty much all knowledge AND it was easy to find and generally reliable. And it was my exact high school and college years.
Like someday we will have to explain that Google (a nefarious spy machine with its joke of a search engine being slowly discarded over time) was once the most valuable tool ever created.
Every dad who has ever abandoned his family has a story from his perspective where he didn’t. And a new wife who thinks the kids are crazy because the ex is poisoning their opinion of him. Even his fake lighthearted cadence gave me de ja vu.
I wake up at 6 a.m. to find that my daughter has posted a TikTok video trashing me.
She's a big social media influencer with millions of followers. Here it is . . .
I recently ~~doubled my income and I cannot emphasize enough how easy mindset shifts, positivity, emotional communication, being a good friend, being a good date, eating well and exercising, and investing in my hobbies are with more money.
I always thought office jobs were pretty easy when I was in the service industry. But now that I have one? I can confirm with 100% certainty they are literally so fucking easy and you guys are all pussies.
THINGS YOU CAN STILL DO WHILE SOCIAL DISTANCING:
- text me to say that you have always thought I was cute and smart and funny but I was just so intimidating but with the weird apocalyptic vibe and all you just though maybe
@matildae22
You’re not wrong but I’d argue that that “type of person” you’re talking about is, by and large, teens. And that is fairly developmentally appropriate for them.
.
@hinge
posted “stop Asian hate” today but still allows you to filter matches by race (for free) but NOT political affiliation, meaning BIPOC can’t keep themselves safe but bigots can fuel their fetishes. why don’t you post less infographics and make actual policy changes.
It has come to my attention that many of my friends won’t ask for what they need from service people because they don’t want to seem mean? As former barista (for years) we don’t give a shit about comping a drink or making it again, as long as you’re nice! Here’s how to phrase it:
CDC says u can quarantine if you find someone to cover but it can’t be one of the new ppl bc they’re still training to close and they can only do mids right now
When you go from a job where you provide tangible value for society (food service) to a high-paying job that provides no value (sending emails, making graphics, etc) you will forever feel like your job is fake and you’re about to get fired (because it is an you are)
Do u ever go on a date and realize the gap between you and every human in the world is so wide and getting wider every day and every person who has ever lived on your island has either left or been pushed out and maybe you should have gone about your whole life differently?
@itsmariannnna
If you hate working out you’re probably working out too hard or too often. Slow down your cardio, decrease your heavy weight sessions per week. And most importantly, if you ever really don’t want to go just don’t. Go when you have energy and want to feel good.
@raynefq
I vividly remember multiple articles talking about the bravery of putting her tiny tits on television “and they’re misshapen too!!” It made my cry lol.
Girls when they visited the same beach as a guy once: “omg invisible string 😍😍😍”
Girls when they have seen the same amateur breakdancer on tinder for the tenth time this year:
Oh no girls are outperforming boys in academics I guess we need to create a generation of content about how cool it is to be hot and dumb and get free stuff from men
Watching the public response to this video is insane. Like this girl is crushing (you can clearly hear it) and nobody is asking “hey, gee, I wonder if there is context that makes this joke funnier than it appears to myself personally.”
@Tanya_Sabrinaaa
(Planning a date time but no location, following each other on IG, never confirming day of bc they both only 40% wanna go, never talk again, watch stories forever)
A reminder that gig workers don’t set prices based on what they believe they’re worth. It’s mostly based on how busy they are. If they’re too booked at a lower price, this is the price they set to protect their free time.
@anylaurie16
LAURIE!!! Thank you!!!! Telling others to wear masks usually falls to staff and it’s so much harder for people in service positions to receive that kind of treatment and worry whether it will end in a negative review or a lower tip or something.
Also making you a free drink is SO much easier than going back and finding and refunding a specific order, so just ask for a new one when you can. And ask them to pour out the bad one TO NOT PUT A FULL DRINK IN THE TRASH
“Hey, sorry to be annoying, but [what went wrong], and I was wondering if it would be possible to [what you want, like a free drink] but no worries either way of course!”
When liberals see real class consciousness in the flesh they are always repulsed by it and that’s how you know dems are capitalists first and foremost.
Omg, poor baby has her first job. Like..she has to commute?? Like...she has to cook dinner?? Like...no time or energy to work out?? Like..she's working in person not remote??? Like...She. Has. To. Work. 9. To. 5 ??? What????🙄
I love to make clothes that I realistically will never wear!!!!! This was a $6.99 tablecloth from goodwill!!! I made the set mostly in the dark and didn’t notice a huge yellow stain on the titty!!!!
“Men need to go to therapy” no babe, men need to go to Bed Bath and Beyond. Men need to go to H&R Block. Men need to go to the skincare aisle. Gotta walk before you can run.
Everyone wants to go to the “best” taco spot or the “best” bbq place and idk how to explain that I’ve enjoyed every restaurant I’ve ever been to. Eating out is so fun.
I would love a career in comedy but I don’t like influencers, suburbs in the Midwest, or anything involving the word “packet”. I want to have an old money patron and be their live-in laughter concubine like in the Middle Ages.
To be clear, the dad perspective is that he is entitled to a relationship with his daughter unless he does something sufficiently bad (physical abuse). The daughter perspective is that having a dad who seems indifferent to your existence is more painful than not having a dad.
Me: did you hear about Kanye
My bf: did you hear about the star that got sucked into a black hole and caused a gamma ray to shoot past the earth, missing us by about the length of our moon? And we all would have died? If it hit us?
Men: we are drowning in your unreachable beauty standards!!!
Every Article: It’s Rodent Boy Summer. Good News For Little Medieval Disfigured Freak Boys. Every Girl Is Nutting Her Pants for Boys Who Look Like They Got Cursed By A Witch.
Something crazy about Denver comedy is that women lament about male comics so much and then all of a sudden you realize every woman is actually talking about the same six guys.
The best part of doing comedy for a decade is that some dude who seemed totally normal 9 years ago is an alcoholic now and messages you something incomprehensible once a month
@itsmariannnna
Also you are probably not eating enough. Truthfully, diet culture has made working out into a very uncomfortable/unpleasant feeling. It should feel like play. You should have excess energy at the start and feel tired at the end. You should NOT feel tired at the start.
WHAT KILLED THE CRABS?
The official story is something like “a billion snow crabs disappeared.”
If that sounds fishy to you, keep reading. Let’s dive into the ecology, oceanography, & geopolitical history of the Bering Sea.
A science thread on crabs, corruption, & collapse: 🦀