✧ ✧ ✧ @emohilaryduff Twitter profile

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@nephezys

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@emohilaryduff

6 months

@turntretarded Is this a live tweet

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@emohilaryduff

2 months

@FIVESTARBlTCH When you said “also wtf we have snatched at home???” I lost it

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@emohilaryduff

8 months

It’s actually crazy that your parents can just ignore you too many times as a child and now romantic relationships are impossible

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@emohilaryduff

2 years

oh we are meeting there at 10 pm? have you considered the fact that im sleepy

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@emohilaryduff

5 years

everyone a thug until Hey There Delilah comes on

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@emohilaryduff

2 years

lol i just remembered when i got arrested for xanax and they made me go to court mandated therapy then halfway through i had to see a psychiatrist who then tried to prescribe me xanax

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@emohilaryduff

6 months

I bought a homeless man breakfast this morning and when I was walking back to my car he was like “goodbye, I love you!” And then some dumbass sedan driving on the wrong side of the road almost hit me and he proceeded to threaten her over it in my honor

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@emohilaryduff

8 years

Is giving a boy flowers a thing why isn't giving a boy flowers a thing I wanna give flowers to a boy boys deserve flowers too

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@emohilaryduff

1 year

I giggle a little when you ask someone about their hobbies and they mention listening to music like okay cool so you’re a human being

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@emohilaryduff

1 year

My favorite part about being human is seeing a really big rock and needing to stand on top of it

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@emohilaryduff

9 months

Getting rear ended next to a beautiful lake and crying about it not because of the accident but because the driver was a sweet 80 year old lady who delivers flowers for fun, her husband died in July and she was on her way to pick up his death certificate

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@emohilaryduff

8 months

Abandoning astrology because I kept getting messages about someone significant from my past returning to me to make amends and it was just my coke dealer from 6 years ago on Snapchat

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@emohilaryduff

1 year

My little sister just showed me a $400 Barbie playhouse that she wants for her birthday and when I was like oof that’s expensive but I’ll try to make it happen! she was like “oh do you not have any money .. sorry” girl fuck you!

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@emohilaryduff

8 months

I am about to google schizophrenia rates in the U.S. within the past three years

Reiki Momma

@Luminary_Wings

8 months

Also let’s be clear men do a lot of love spell and binding work especially through tongue, sex and energy manipulation. Just cause they don’t sit down with a candle doesn’t mean men are exempt from love spells, all that love bombing, spitting in mouths, talking during sex. PLEASE

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@emohilaryduff

2 years

my friends boyfriend works at a farmers market and brings her fresh cheese and produce, is always passenger princess and never loses his temper anyways today she told me she will occasionally call him ‘babygirl’ because of this

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@emohilaryduff

6 months

Have we ever considered that if I can’t put all my eggs in one basket then maybe something is wrong with the basket? Why is it my fault for utilizing the basket for its intended purpose, carrying all my eggs. Get a reliable basket and you won’t have this problem.

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@emohilaryduff

2 years

how slutty am i legally allowed to dress for emo night so i can make it less about the music and more about me

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@emohilaryduff

2 months

It’s warm again, work is providing full tuition coverage on my pursuit of a BS, I get my back tattooed this month, am spending my first PTO in years in a cabin with a clawfoot tub next week, just watched natural born killers for the first time - life is so dreamy right now

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@emohilaryduff

1 year

Very shocking to be flirted with while wearing men’s basketball shorts that say “goat” on the front and no makeup

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@emohilaryduff

10 months

My baseline for insanity is my dads ex girlfriend that threw dishes at ME because HE broke up with her, as long as I remain below that I’m being pretty normal actually

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@emohilaryduff

4 months

This just pissed me off so bad

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@powcampsurvivor

4 months

i thought everyone was exaggerating but these guys really do exist

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@emohilaryduff

2 years

im this dramatic

Härkönen

@yokaihainen

2 years

Egyptian poem from 3,300 years ago

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@emohilaryduff

1 year

10 minutes clean from nicotine

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@emohilaryduff

2 years

it is very important to have people in your life you can share every little thought you have throughout the day with

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@emohilaryduff

1 year

funniest bit my crackhead mom ever ran was allowing my identity to be stolen 4 times before I was really a person and my dad only found out because someone tried applying for a home loan under my name and when they called his # to confirm details he had to be like “she’s 5??”

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@emohilaryduff

1 year

$1 million dollars OR never again have to experience that feeling you get in your stomach when you realize someone you love is actually a really bad person ??

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@emohilaryduff

2 years

yeah i do manifestation but not in the right way. i be thinking real hard about a piano falling from the sky onto them like in cartoons.

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@emohilaryduff

2 years

my job allows me to be surrounded by so many brilliant medical professionals and scientists who apparently deemed my 80% accuracy on french duolingo satisfying enough to take on a research center in canada

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@emohilaryduff

22 days

Abandoning nicotine for good because cashier at my vape shop took off his shirt in the middle of the store to show me his back tattoo

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@emohilaryduff

7 months

God gave me child bearing hips for what!! Solely to carry 70lbs of dog food up a flight of stairs apparently

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@emohilaryduff

1 year

Lovers to enemies to lovers to friends to enemies to lovers to enemies

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@emohilaryduff

1 year

What drug did they put in 90’s-2000’s romance/romcoms i watch them religiously

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@emohilaryduff

10 months

Renting a car for the first time has me thinking about life differently like damn guess all that’s left for me now is to settle down and start a family

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@emohilaryduff

2 years

blocked deleted i have a gun now

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@emohilaryduff

5 months

Just jailbroke my neuralink

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@emohilaryduff

5 years

COP SAID HIMSELF ITS A CAP GUN AND STILL GAVE A CHILD!!! LESS THAN HALF A MINUTE TO RESPOND TO AN UNEXPECTED SITUATION BEFORE SHOOTING HIM WHILST!!!! HIDING BEHIND A FENCE BARELY VISABLE AND NO CHARGES AGAINST HIM...THIS IS A JOKE RIGHT

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@emohilaryduff

9 months

I despise young nurses so much sometimes, why are you being catty to me about wearing my workout clothes to a drug screening for a job you know nothing about that I’ve already worked at for almost a year and a half I am only here for you to handle my piss and blood for 10 minutes

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@emohilaryduff

1 year

The sluttiest thing a man can do is work at Trader Joe’s

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@emohilaryduff

9 months

I used to tell teachers in kindergarten that my dream job was hooters because that’s where my mom worked at the time

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@emohilaryduff

1 year

To the TSA who threw away my 4 oz toothpaste I hope you really feel like you saved the day it was crest and you looked like you could use some of it

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@emohilaryduff

1 year

Walked into my favorite vape shop and they were in the middle of getting robbed I was like um sorry to bother but can I have my sunset flavored air pls

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@emohilaryduff

2 months

My friend just started her debrief about her date last night with “what if I was to say he was hypothetically in D.C. on January 6th”

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@emohilaryduff

2 years

working in medical research is hilarious because why are we giving cocaine to a fly

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@emohilaryduff

1 year

Swamp is the obvious answer

michael hirsch ting

@michaelhirschbb

1 year

one’s gotta go

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@emohilaryduff

1 year

This is so fucked up I love it

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1 year

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@emohilaryduff

2 years

after a long period of intermittently fucking around, i am now here to strictly fuck around

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@emohilaryduff

2 years

i feel like a toddler ordering a refresher from starbucks. coffee today? mm no thanks thats for grown ups just juice please. they even put it in a little sippy cup im sick

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@emohilaryduff

2 years

i know i dont have anxiety anymore because i can sleep naked in peace now

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@emohilaryduff

10 months

In middle of trying to convince my family to all chip in to buy a remote cabin somewhere for “emergencies” I think in another universe there’s a me who doesn’t have a career and is living off the grid with booby traps everywhere

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@emohilaryduff

2 years

absolutely humbling doing my finances and forcing myself to see how much excess spending i do, will only be screaming in the woods for fun now

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@emohilaryduff

2 years

unlimited money glitch by never checking my bank account until payday

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@emohilaryduff

9 months

I yearn for the downfall of mostly all digital media and platforms but if Spotify was to ever disappear there would be claw marks on my wall by day 1

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@emohilaryduff

2 years

shut up honey mommy is listening to evanescence right now

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@emohilaryduff

2 years

i like my men looking like i just rescued them from a lifetime of living in the woods

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@emohilaryduff

2 years

one time i asked my tech dad for relationship advice after my ex told me he licked frogs with a bunch of people and they all got naked and instead of saying anything he thought it was so funny that he bought a domain name inspired by it

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@emohilaryduff

6 months

*guy with a table storing his 70 identical handguns and 10 similar rifles* yeah dude I don’t really get my gfs obsession with the Stanley cups.

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@emohilaryduff

1 year

This guy I was feeling makes unironic text block thirst trap TikTok’s .. I can’t have shit!

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@emohilaryduff

1 year

Furnishing a new apartment is the most stressful good time a girl can have

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@emohilaryduff

1 year

Red flag perhaps but I will love lana del rey forever she dropped ride and now I’m loyal till death

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@emohilaryduff

1 year

When I was a kid I thought the American Dream was to end up on fear factor

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@emohilaryduff

7 months

I miss flip phones so much. Loudly closing a phone after a call is an irreplaceable feeling.

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@emohilaryduff

11 months

I’ve had two prior jobs where nasty coworkers testing me almost turned physical, im just not throwing the first punch. I am a better woman now but with that being said I am not opposed to witchcraft at this time

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@emohilaryduff

2 years

why am i feeling very gorgeous on a random thursday night

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@emohilaryduff

1 year

Used to be addicted to drugs now I’m addicted to Facebook marketplace and telling my coworkers I’m not allowed in Canada

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@emohilaryduff

2 years

almost blindsided this guy pulling out of the drive through and he goes “aww you can hit me baby” okay i will❤️

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@emohilaryduff

2 years

in middle school science we had to measure areas of our body for a project and i got teased for having “birthing hips” look whos laughing now

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@emohilaryduff

2 years

my friend took a video of me doing deadlifts so i shot her on the spot

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@emohilaryduff

2 years

My CrossFit coach texted me the other day and then added me on snapchat through contact search and after I told my friends this they admitted asking me to do these classes with them because they couldn’t tell if he was gay or not and I was the test .. straight to jail!

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@emohilaryduff

2 years

everyone grow beards please please please

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