Young and trans in Canada by the amazing โฆ
@ZiyaJonesA
โฉ
Jasper & Aspen are the coolest, bravest, most amazing kids and I am the luckiest to get to be their Mom.
The article is also in the summer edition of โฆ
@Chatelaine
#ProtectTransKids
I ordered a very specific trans themed birthday cake from a local small business in Leduc. I paid in advance.
When I went to pick it up today, the owner sent out a man who I assume was their husband... 1/?
Then I went to goddamn Dairy Queen and got a goddamn cake. Because my kid is having a birthday cake, even when transphobes try to ruin it.
This world is on fire and today I hope it burns. /12 FIN
I know the app loves a good FAFO story, but Iโm glad that I trusted myself & waited.
I didnโt get a cake, but I made sure another DV victim has an emergency lifeline, just like so many of you gave to me. J is okay too.
Plus I got to tell a transphobe โfuck you.โ
At the top of my lungs, I yelled,
โHey, buddy? Fuck you. FUCK YOU. Fuck your bigotry, fuck your white man confidence. Fuck you for being a goddamn transphobe 10/?
FUCK YOU for making this world worse. For all the fucking kids who have to deal with pathetic assholes like you. FUCK YOU.โ
I got into my car, rolled my window down, held my middle finger up as I drove away. 11/?
For anyone asking:
I do not want to share the business name because when I spoke with the woman, she was happy to do the cake. Excited, even.
I did not call the cops bc as a domestic abuse survivor, that isnโt always safe. I followed up with her & will wait for a response.
UPDATE:
I got my money back. Iโm not going to share much else but I will say this:
- The woman is not transphobic. She apologized over and over.
- My instincts were absolutely correct about the man. When you know, you just know.
Iโve had a lot of people ask to donate money to myself or Jasper. If you wish to, DM me. Pls consider these options first.
- Donate to a local org in your area that supports 2SLGBTQIA+
- If you are in Edmonton, visit Sugar & Spiced, as they offered to make another cake.
I gave her some suggestions on how better to protect herself, suggested she refer out for any specialty cakes. She agreed it was safest. I offered resources & told her to keep my number in her phone under a fake name, to call me anytime, day or night, if she needed.
@BrentRudyk
generously gave me the amount I lost from the cake back already. I am genuinely at a loss at the generosity being offered to my family.
Please also forgive me for the slow replies, my mentions and messages are a bit RIP.
Much โค๏ธ๐ณ๏ธโ๐โค๏ธ๐ณ๏ธโโง๏ธโค๏ธ
I should also make this clearer:
I 100% would rather any offers for money be donated to 2SLGBTQIA+ organizations. If you are in Canada? Seek out Indigenous orgs too, especially today.
(Things I canโt believe I need to say out loud)
He called me a pedophile. That people like me would be the first to go when the new world started. That my kid was a freak of nature. He claimed he called child services to inform them of abuse. Apparently, Iโll burn in hell with Trudeau. 7/?
I laughed. Like cackled - I laugh when Iโm nervous, and hell itโs not good deescalation before I told him Iโd paid money & I was owed a cake.
He began screaming. Unhinged, and wild. I donโt even remember most of it. I just stood there, my mouth agape, occasionally laughing. 6/?
I thought about Jasper and what they would have felt in this moment, about my friends who are trans or non-binary and something snapped in my brain.
I turned around from getting in my car, walked right into the middle of the street, still shaking. He was still glaring at me 9/?
As loud as he could he said, โYou are mistaken, we donโt make cakes for people who donโt follow the rules of society.โ All I managed was, โWhat?โ
Then he was yelling,
โYou asked for us to make a cake for your little freak child and we donโt support your libtard beliefs.โ 5/?
At some point, I turned and walked back to my car, choosing to leave. Screw the money, I was on the verge of crying. I could feel my heart racing. I was horrified. I angry. I was humiliated. I could see people looking. I just wanted to get in my car and drive away. 8/?
Note: Forgive me for the absolute chaos that this thread may become. Iโm still shaking and I am beyond livid.
Iโve heard of these things happening, but I naively thought I would never experience it. Even more so, I am so glad J wasnโt with me as they had wanted to come 2/?
He put up a hand to stop me from coming closer. So I froze. I was on the edge of their property, mostly in the street still.
He said, โThere is no cake here for you.โ
I laughed and said, โI spoke to X last week. She said she was happy to do it. I sent payment too.โ 4/?
I arrived at the home at the time weโd decided on, shouted a friendly hello and offered that I was there for the cake Iโd ordered for my son.
When the man started walking toward me, every hair on my body stood up. I knew something wasnโt right. 3/?
It still blows my mind that we only have to isolate for 5 days. Iโm on Day 6 and am still symptomatic. I could technically go out in public with a mask on today. I wonโt, because Iโm not interested in spreading this, but geez, weโve really effed this up.
#ableg
#covid19AB
I lost 30 followers over the last 48 hours and I will assume itโs because of the fact that I refuse to be quiet about the residential school findings and have stated that the RCMP is one of the first structures that has to be dismantled to start reconciliation.
@L_Switty
Iโm not going to name the business. His wife didnโt have an issue with it, we talked. It was 100% the husband here.
Plus... like, thatโs only going to embolden this man. He doesnโt deserve any more energy or time.
@stanzipotenza
โWhat happened?โ
โBlah blah blah, I donโt want to have an honest conversation with you about what is bothering me and instead Iโm going to pretend to be the bigger person but Iโm actually baby. Love and lightโ
Overheard at the Dr office in Alberta
Nurse/Receptionist: We canโt ask if they are positive anymore.
Dr: Can you ask if they took a test?
N/R: No, she has all the symptoms. But she wonโt mask.
Dr: FFS. Iโll call & ask. Iโm not putting the entire clinic & staff at risk.
Iโm going to say this only once:
Breastfeeding is NOT free.
Not everyone can breastfeed for multiple reasons; physically, mentally, emotionally. Those reasons are valid.
Formula is not subpar & is absolutely necessary.
Fed is best. Fed is best. FED IS BEST.
@Spencer__W__
Iโm going to take some space to process and let myself settle before I do anything. Plus, I want to give the woman a chance to give me my money back.
Misogyny lives in all of us, but it lives most of all in people who see these acts and find a way to excuse the behaviour or even condone it.
If you are amplifying behaviour that causes victims to have to go into โDo not reactโ mode, you are complicit.
Full stop.
My dad, who avidly supported the UCP, said to me yesterday, โI donโt think he (Kenney) cares about the people who voted him in. This isnโt what I voted for. I shouldnโt be scared to go to work.โ
Heโs a custodian in a school.
#abed
#AbLeg
#VeryWorriedAB
I canโt tell my kiddo this news.
I canโt tell him.
Iโve gathered him up from the brink so many times and thisโฆheโs finally in a good place. He was nearing his turn for care at the Gender Clinic. Weโve been waiting for 2 years.
Now heโs got to wait another 2 years.
I watched the women in that video circle Freeland. They knew. I watched them avoid eye contact. I watched them press that elevator button multiple times. I held my breath just like they were. I wondered if when the door closed if Freeland cried.
So Iโm currently going through
@CMOH_Albertas
supposed data for opening up. Mostly, Iโm cross referencing the studies and research she uses. Follow along!
When I see men complaining that their issues donโt get as much space, I wonder if they know what this is like. I wonder if they know that every woman has a story or knows someone with a story of how they were brutally attacked by a man who was raging out over nothing. *
If you can go get a massage, a pedicure, have a beer on a patio, go to a mall, buy a shirt or a car, you arenโt in a lockdown.
Just in case anyone was absolutely confused.
#ableg
#abpoli
#COVID19AB
If Kenney was a woman, we wouldnโt be discussing a photo of government dinner that breaks rules because he would have been ousted over the Hawaii scandal.
@amanionearth
@ohJuliatweets
@DoreenGLM
This G is like, โOoookay. I have two sacks of flour on my chest, but you do you.โ
I specially love when they say you can find bras at a mainstream store for cheap. Your tits are not big if you donโt have to adventure for a bra.
Welcome to Alberta under
@ABDanielleSmith
. Where rights to not get sick are less important then those who donโt want to test, mask or get vaccinated:
Where everyone has to dance around this anti-science morons & hope to hell they donโt wind up with an outbreak, disabled or dead.
Itโs that male rage, perpetuated again. And the end result is still the same: You cannot react.
A victim is a victim. Full stop. No one deserves unfiltered, terrifying rage just for existing. No one.
They knew: Do not react. Do not react. Do NOT react.
Then the men who tried to escort the dude out? They didnโt react either. Quiet calls to get out. They backed away from him.
Do not react. Do not react.
Update on
#ABSchoolWalkout
As of now, 20 + Schools are participating in the Walkout from across the province.
There are students participating in Edmonton, Calgary, Airdrie, Cochrane, Lethbridge, Red Deer, Leduc Wetaskiwin & Westlock.
Just watched a woman throw a fit about masking while in a lab. Argued for a good five minutes even after she was offered an isolation room ( boy did that set her off) before her teenager who has already put on their mask and muttered, โMOM. Just put it on.โ
I wonder if they know that ppl who face these men will face criticism like - โshe deserved itโ or โwhat did she do first?โ or โthats part of the jobโ or โthis isnโt realโ or โsheโs a bitch & had it comingโ or โshe should have thought of that before xyzโ
From all genders.
Iโve been kicked, pushed, bitten, pulled, slapped, punched & even sexually assaulted by these angry men.
Iโve had men scream mere inches from my face things like fucking bitch, cunt, idiot, slut, whore, fat pig, fat bitch.
You cannot react. You cannot. Your life depends on it.
I wonder if they know that our sex Ed classes taught us to never go out at night, to go in pairs, to avoid male strangers. That our churches told us to make our selves small, our mothers and other relatives teaching us how to save ourselves in the face of male rage.
My ex was renowned for his fits of rage. Hell, he wasnโt the first man that Iโve had to stand stoically while they spout off. My go to is normally freeze.
The earliest lesson I learned:
Do not react. Do not fight back.
Women are told this over & over again. It actually impacts racialized women harder than white women too but thatโs another thread that deserves discussion.
When a male shows rage, everyone coddles him. Everyone makes themselves smaller. No one reacts. Sometimes? Heโs celebrated.
One of my partners mothers even went as far, after witnessing her son hit me, at the dinner table, to โremember itโs my job not to make him angry.โ
We donโt react because we are told by other women not to, and because a reaction could mean our life.
My youngest is wearing his pride flag as a cape in celebration of
#Pride
.
โI know this will get me more bullied but they already do it so I donโt care. Besides if anyone messes with me, youโve got me, Mama.โ
You bet your ass I do, King.
#ProtectTransKids
.
Iโve had them scream about how their anger is justified. Their behaviour warranted. Iโve been threatened with suicidal ideations, death & told I am nothing compared to them.
You cannot react. Even tears will fuel them.
In Alberta, if you are white & threaten to kill the PM, play on highways & build structures, the cops will just warn you to be careful.
If you protest a genocide (of Palestinians), peacefully, the cops will violently attack you.
#ACAB
#FreePalestine
#FuckThePolice
#Fascism
Anything becomes a weapon. Iโve had armchairs, food, kitchen chairs, milk jugs, artwork, beer bottles, phones, pillows, books & even had my car & home damaged by angry men.
You cannot react. Do not make it worse.
Iโm angry as hell today. The school boards are submitting re-entry plans and itโs BLATANTLY clear that Scenario 1 does not work without more funding.
@AdrianaLaGrange
has failed parents, the education community and most of all the students.
#ableg
#abed
@shoffmanAB
The night I had to call 911 I have no idea to this day how or when I put 911 into my phone. Somewhere between his screaming at my kids, physically assaulting me, damaging property and literally wondering if I was about to die, it made its way into my phone.
You cannot react.
@MediumSizeMeech
This is giving me flashbacks to when Twitter found out a lot of white people donโt wash their legs and I have never recovered from learning that about my people.
Also, when did a washcloth become a symbol of being poor?
I also have no idea how I made it from the top floor of the house, to my kitchen while on that call. All I know is that I couldnโt react.
You CANNOT react. My heart was pounding. My kids were safely in the basement. Do not react.
Hello.
Iโm currently living in poverty.
I donโt give a shit about the park fees. If I was travelling there, Iโd budget for them.
Stop using the poor like this. Saying itโs an โaccessibilityโ issue? Poor people arenโt going to the mountains, yโall.
#ableg
#abndp
So,
@jkenney
, now that the Pope has not only acknowledged colonialism, but residential schools & the irreparable harm they caused, you and
@AdrianaLaGrange
are rewriting the curriculum and firing Chris Champion who is a Residential School Denialist. Right?
#AbLeg
#abpoli
This reference is interesting to me for a couple of reasons:
1. Itโs from the week of August 5th, so it would not have been available to
@CMOH_Alberta
in June or early July when restrictions were lifted.
2. Why is she using data from another country when there is data here?
The first study I went to, showed this:
This isnโt a study that has been peer reviewed or published. It also finds that children DO get sick and that some DO get long term illnesses, despite what the UCP is saying.
@Cordelia_K_
@L_Switty
Absolutely. Iโm waiting to hear from his wife first. When I spoke to her, she was so excited to do it. So I canโt put it on her.
My gut says there was more to this.
I donโt know who needs to hear this but our government is essentially using the ideology of eugenics when talking about
#COVID19AB
numbers.
Iโm not sure how to explain why this is not a good place to be in any society. Comorbidity is a desensitization tactic.
#ableg
#abpoli
Until we acknowledge Canada is built on stolen land. Until we meet all 94 calls to action in the
#TRC
. Until we search the grounds of every res. school. Until we do more about
#MMIWG
. Until there is clean accessible water.
There is nothing to celebrate.
#NoPrideinGenocide
For any Mormons who want to defend abuse. Tell me how old Fanny Alger was when she became Joseph Smithโs wife? Helen Mar Kimball? 16 & 14.
It wasnโt a different time. This was church sanctioned child abuse. The church is literally founded on it.
Fuck you,
@ABDanielleSmith
. Truly. You are a ghoul. Kids are going to die. Kids are going to be injured.
How dare you do this to my kid, to his friends, to all trans kids? How dare you tell them they donโt deserve to be safe?
#ableg
๐งต- 19 years ago, I was an 18 year old girl holding a brand new baby in her arms and learning how big love can actually be. He would be the moment that changed me permanently. Our hello was so brief but there was so much love.
#adoption
Thereโs more photos from the
#ABSchoolWalkout
in Leduc but this is it for now.
#Leduc
had about 40 students, and 8 community members who showed up to support. We had counter protesters but I told them to keep their distance. (
@lori_bauckman
,
@SingularZeez
)
My doctors nurse, gleefully says, โSo because you need this AISH paperwork so quickly, we are going to charge you $165 plus another $75. I donโt know if that changes your mind about applyingโฆโ
I burst into tears and told her I have no choice and Iโll have to figure it out.
They appear to be correlating things, in my opinion, that might not actually be causation. Like I said, it seems to lack a lot of information.
@CMOH_Alberta
absolutely should not be using this as a guide to make policy.
โThis never happenedโ says random, hateful TERF account, determined to ignore how their hatred is making this world uglier.
You donโt believe in science, so like, why do I even care if you believe me?
Get outside and touch grass.
Again, how the hell did this data inform
@CMOH_Alberta
in June or July when it was just release on August 18th?
I also will say that microbiology is way out of my knowledge and I canโt begin to comment on this particular study beyond the date.
The UCP and their cronies are claiming that teachers are bullying them and I just have to wonder if theyโve ever been actually bullied before.
#ableg
#abpoli
Last Update:
I have been asked to address this:
The business is no longer running. If there are any at risk ppl in my local community who need reassurance, I am happy to share limited details via DM.
Beyond this, I will not be adding any more information. Stay safe โค๏ธโค๏ธโค๏ธ
This study, again, is not peer reviewed and explicitly says not to use for clinical guidance. I wonโt go into the data because the study seems pretty bare bones on a general glance through.
@she_psyduck
There are soooo many people telling on themselves. You can do everything right (and she did) but the abuser will still find a way to assert control.
Plus, the cognitive dissonance you have to live in to survive abuse is so wild and real.
A little ๐งตand personal story about what
#ABSchoolWalkout
meant for me, watching from the sidelines.
Some may remember but when Aspen came out, heโd asked to also come out to my parents. They are incredibly devout in their Mormonism.
I knew it was not going to go well.
We are making people who make barely minimum wage, enforce piss poor restrictions because our government is completely negligent.
#ableg
#abpoli
#COVID19AB