Fan of Charlie Kirk: naive, imaginative, dim, either 18 or 81
Fan of Ben Shapiro: drunk guy at bar who swings at u & knocks self out
Fan of Jordan Peterson: constipated but determined; pale, sweaty
Fan of Elon Musk: genuinely cannot differentiate between butts & cheeseburgers
@KaitMarieox
hi random strangers
excuse me can i have attn
ok did u hear about that ass weasel kaitlin
isn’t she the worst
oh u never heard of her well basically she’s an ass weasel
anyways what if i told you 👓
im that ass weasel kaitlin
who’s the ass weasel now huh
Wow. Good job MAGAs, the FBI showed up at my clinic.
Thankfully, they said the visit was just a formality, & confirmed that giving viramins to foolish trump supporters instead of desperately needed antibiotics is well within my rights! Lmao free speech rules
ME: help the poor, treat the sick, free the oppressed, & welcome asylum seekers
CONSERVATIVE: LOL hell no u democrap moran
ME: i give vitamins soaked in viruses to racists
CONSERVATIVE: EXCUSE ME WHAT TO FUCK NO U SHULD BE HELPING EVERYONE REGARDLESS OF LIFE CHOICES OR BELIEFS
ROSANNE BARR: im openly racist
ABC: lol cute!
BARR: here’s some racism
ABC: yes ppl love that!
BARR: here’s even more
ABC: oops oh no ppl hate it lol
HEY GUYS: more than 4,600 americans in puerto rico preventably died after hurricane maria due to Trump’s negligence & incompetence
I’m a doctor at an urgent care clinic in seattle, & when foolish trump supporters dare ask me for help i love to misdiagnose them and give them viramins instead of antibiotics. Then i prescribe weed to myself and laugh at them
the mainstream media is working overtime claiming Alex Jones got kicked off some big platforms.
Lol. the whole thing’s fake. Staged. In my view, manufactured. pretty much didn’t happen, folks. A giant hoax
End capitalism
Abolish ICE
Trump is stupid & bad
Most dems are bad too
Yes all TERFs are scum
ACAB
Socialism is good
Support sex workers
Healthcare is a right
Only intersectional feminism
Legalize & decriminalize cannabis
Every conservative is a dipshit
This is outrageous! I was just suspended from my own clinic! The WA medical board said that while it’s perfectly legal & good to misdiagnose Trump supporters at my leisure, it’s NOT ok to prescribe weed to myself. So much for “freedom.“ Anyway, im high af rn
Hello to the fbi, who’ve been @-ed about my practice 10+ times today, each @ funnier than the last. Conservatives are too foolish to realize that doctors can do whatever we want at private clinics! I just gave a patient in a maga hat a hot carl, & told him it’d treat his diabetes
if you told me a decade ago that juggalos, emo kids, taylor swift stans and so on would grow up to join forces and battle modern fascism, i would tell you that makes perfect sense, because i’ve seen their passion and i fear its power. they will kill for her. i believe
a number of dweebs are extremely emotional that i’ve called a certain gamer nerdlord, some white dude who calls himself “ninja,” a sexist;
my apologies. what i meant to say is that he’s racist AND sexist
have you noticed these mysterious abbreviations in bios?? here is what they mean:
INFP “i need feet pics”
INTJ “i nasally take jizz”
INTP “i’ve never tasted pussy”
age 18: im punk, im at a cursive show, ima dye my hair black cause a dem lost
age 28: Occupy was inspiring. The establishment is irredeemable. I’m going to start drinking water. I should join a gym.
age 38: ACAB wud u succ garfields dongle 666k replies 69k RTs 420k likes lmaooo
@NRA
Hello, i am Dr. Thirst, a very well-known doctor and thought leader, and it’s my medical opinion that the NRA should administer all of their ideas anally
Jacob Wohl’s hipster coffee shop is right across the street from my clinic! I’ve been supplying them with laxatives to put in all republican customer coffee orders for years. I’m 100% certain that every time Jacob goes there, he gets wicked shits all day long & requires a diaper.
do not vote red, the color white dudes turn when they scream, stomp, & poop themselves in defense of violence & bigotry
vote blue, the color we turn while holding our breath waiting for dems to stop them
I keep cracking myself up imagining 2018 centrist commentary when trump goes— or in 1945 europe, all like “oh sad, hitler died today. rip, war hero. keep it classy y’all, always respect the dead. pls do not celebrate or joke about a death just because your politics didn’t align.”
Heroes exist all around us. They come in different forms and may at times seem invincible.
John McCain’s tumor may be gone but its heroics will never be forgotten, nor will its impact on this nation.
Because of that it is invincible in many ways. RIP McCain’s tumor!
Numerous furious boys are searching for “Dr. Ford” posts in order to reply incorrectly that she’s not a doctor, lol
As a renowned medical doctor myself, i’ve concluded: barnyard swine for slaughter have vastly more complex brains than conservative men, &they should switch places
the american government: lets let our own people die from preventable diseases, poverty, guns & other domestic terrorism while our military spends trillions on planes which can’t fly & warships which can’t shoot
the rest of the world: weird flex but ok
SPOUSE: so, in short, you’re just too online. i want a divorce. what do you have to say?
ME: (thinking about a wario’d version of hillary clinton) wallery clinton lol
@FoxBusiness
MY WORD, a politician who listens to working class constituents instead of just donors??? please help me retrieve my monocle, i have dropped it in horror
dipshits who attempt to compare democratic socialists to nazis (who killed socialists) are lying on purpose to deflect from the fact that their own ideology is shared with neo-nazis
Recently happened upon this enterpriser who does topless cryptocurrency education videos & i cant stop laughing at the concept of the dudes who crank hog to it
friendly lady talking to me at the store: wow, it’s so nice to make a new friend out in public instead of online! haha
me: yeah same! haha
her: i’m becca btw
me: hi becca, i’m diana, great to meet you
her: you too! so hey... are you on any social media?
me:
her:
me:
her:
me: no
wealthy career propagandists like tucker carlson actively incite proudly bigoted conservatives who watch fox news, who keep committing acts of terrorism, assaulting & murdering innocent people all across the country
cucker tarlson doesn’t deserve peace
NO, HE’S GOT POOPY PANTS!
MY DIAPER ISN’T EVEN POOPY IT IS PEEPEE!
I’M POOPING NOW! I AM POOPING NOW! I AM POOPING!
SO WHAT IF I MADE A POOPY LET’S SEE YOU POOP IN THE POTTY CENK
AOC should wear a tiara to congress lmao
(leftists get mad at me) oh. AOC should (confused) cosplay as Marx? (more leftists get mad at me)
AOC sho— (liberals get mad at me)
ok. ok (tents fingers)
AOC should totally BOFA Trump (wild cheers, applause)