The Abominable Emperor Norton @ashleynaftule Twitter profile

Pinned Tweet

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

1 year

"Alexa, play 'Finally' by CeCe Peniston"

1

0

13

Last Seen Profiles

@shigesakushige

@A_SN_ST__Love

@ofu_tiki

@AGeorginaH

@XramPhothi13640

@nenesanchi_mu

@GracieBon7

@ShesislSreO

@Xiacijian01

@CompaRevolucion

@ahmed_algw93258

@JPL_WARRIORS

@wickedsalami

@VirgiDArbulu

@sunflocity_

@SmuthrKrkt42426

@Brenda__A1881

@zdFsGFSodGrl3Nv

@bokeplokalmalam

@_OmegaPro

@suvrachakr63962

@ocsriwaramcu

@martalex11_11

@pup_hagen

@FuadAnik2

@Lilkey_34

@goodgun_55

@farihalyy

@GageToThe

@Nhletelo_Lloyd

@sensaidemo_ok

@ninjaasan

@xxxtanderx26832

@l_23la

@SoyFidelPSUV

@Iam_atul__

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

Something we don't talk about enough re: climate change is that it will eventually get so hot that the goth lifestyle will become unsustainable, which means humanity's most precious resource- hot goth chicks- will be extinct by 2040

247

10K

74K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

Laughing at the "people who watch foreign movies think they're more cultured" tweets because no shit. They're literally exposing themselves to more culture than you. That's how it works. You can't eat nothing but Whoppers and call yourself a gourmet

96

4K

38K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

Something I really appreciate about INGLORIOUS BASTERDS and DJANGO UNCHAINED is that they are a very rare species of Hollywood cinema that understands that half-measures in the face of fascism don't work and doesn't try to equivocate about the morality of its political violence

144

3K

35K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

3 months

I’ve taken a lot of psychic damage this year but learning that Jamiroquai dumped Winona Ryder for being too busty AND horny has done me in. I’m like Jimmy Stewart in Vertigo after Madeline falls—catatonic in bed, hallucinating about being trapped in the “Virtual Insanity” room

230

2K

35K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

4 months

Gotta admire Ryan Reynolds' commitment to having the worst batting average of any modern film star. One piece of Chernobyl-grade shit after another- it's genuinely impressive how he's foiled the law of averages by not even accidentally appearing in a good movie in over a decade

710

899

32K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

8 months

Thing that stuck out to me in that A.I. article was the author explaining she has to write books within an eight-week time frame because she needs to pump out 6-10 books a year cause her readers will abandon her if they have to wait more than 4 months for a new book. Miserable

81

1K

17K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

9 months

I know I keep saying this but it is INSANE that they're trying to create a reverent legacy franchise out of a goofy 80's movie where Dan Aykroyd gets dome from a ghost

128

1K

15K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

3 years

It'd be a great bit if the Criterion Channel put "Gaslight" in their "Leaving Soon" section every month but never actually take it off the service

18

922

14K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

What I find particularly insidious about the never-ending Disney versus Scorsese (and now Tarantino) discourse is that the latter are all about signal-boosting other artists and film cultures. Disney is a closed system: it wants to be the ONLY media you consume.

49

2K

14K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

The evolution of a cinephile: THE EARLY YEARS: ah, the masters! Fellini! Kurosawa! Hitchcock! Make way, philistines, I must conquer the canon! THE LATER YEARS: Yo, Bela Lugosi AND a guy in a gorilla suit?! 5 STARS

76

2K

13K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

1 year

One of these men died at 62 and looked like a dehydrated goblin his whole life. The other is aiming to live into triple digits as the world's lamest vampire. Only one of them slept w/ Brigitte Bardot & recorded a reggae album so dank French reactionaries threatened to kill him

41

800

10K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

3 months

This is also why the Lucas films, for all their flaws, work in ways that everything since the Disney sale haven't. His films reflected a love of samurai movies & Westerns & sci-fi serials & WW2 films; post-Lucas Star Wars just loves Star Wars

Tredlocity

@tredlocity

3 months

The reason Venture Bros is a better superhero parody than others is not because "it loves superheroes" but because it loves so many other things that aren't superheroes.

56

693

7K

65

516

10K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

12 days

Francis Ford Coppola writing Megalopolis:

10

424

9K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

tl;dr Nazis and slave-owners getting absolutely Itchy & Scratchy WRECKED is good

7

243

7K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

9 months

If Hugh Jackman was born at the dawn of the 20th century, he'd be living his dream doing MGM musicals and tapping his ass off. But alas, born too late, he is condemned to become as veiny as a Steiner Brother to play the world's angriest Canadian

31

709

7K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

4 months

@Mrs_Klaws Why should I care if he's a great investor, I'm not his fucking accountant

32

36

7K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

9 months

You, a terrible YA author: wahhh I'm losing $1.25 in profits from internet archive!!! Me, downloading "The Golden Age of Looney Tunes" laserdisc rips off internet archive: I love to singa/about the moona and the juna and the springa

14

1K

7K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

Hugh Jackman:

23

810

7K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

Like, Quentin isn't a Marxist or anything but it's hilarious when people call him a reactionary. Absolutely no conservative on planet Earth would take this much JOY from depicting jackboots and slavemasters getting turned into torrential streams of uncanned Chef Boyardee

20

177

6K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

27

699

7K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

I think part of what bothers me about the whole "liking foreign films is pretentious" thing is that it's a symptom of something I find deeply unappealing: a lack of curiosity. I'm not saying that people HAVE TO or should broaden their horizons but their resistance to it is sad

22

566

5K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

People talk a lot about how prescient SFF lit has been over the years but for my $ nobody nailed our future better than Philip K. Dick did in "Ubik" when he wrote about a guy getting trapped in his apartment because he didn't have enough money to pay his smart door to let him out

35

593

4K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

8 months

Like at that point, maybe you SHOULD go do corporate work again. That sounds less bad, in all honesty, than having to churn out a bunch of "potato chip" books every year to a bunch of entitled nerds that can't fucking wait a whole year or two for their treats

4

101

4K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

Being "cultured" doesn't make you morally superior to anyone, so it's not a knock against you as a person if you've never watched "Bicycle Thieves." Plenty of cinephiles out there who're also shitty people. It doesn't mean your taste is bad but it DOES mean your palate is limited

7

235

4K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 months

The news about Lynch is sad but the emotion I’m really feeling right now is anger—anger at how America’s greatest living director can’t get financing in his own country. All the films we could have got when he was healthy… no, the Russos need $40 million, sorry

29

458

4K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

3 years

CHLOE ZHAO: what if we have actual human beings acting in the same room together KEVIN FEIGE: goddamn that’s crazy do other studios know about this

13

392

4K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

3 months

I’m a Lovecraftian protagonist on the last page of their story, gibbering insanely, foaming at the mouth, mind annihilated by the profane knowledge of someone fumbling a baddie this badly

6

88

4K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

3 months

I'd normally never pull some toxic masculine shit & shame people for their sex life/lack thereof BUT if one of my boys told me "I had to dump her, she is too horny & va-va-voom for me" they would never ever hear the end of it. I'd also move heaven and earth to get those digits

7

59

4K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

At some point we as a species decided that oil profits were more important than corsetted big titty ladies with Cleopatra eye makeup. This hell world is what we deserve

6

316

3K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

1 year

It rules so hard that Nolan—one of the least horned-up directors in cinema—is making people lose their minds over the sex scenes in Oppenheimer. Dude finally beat the sexless allegations, made a good movie & drove some of the worst people on here insane—the hat trick

11

320

3K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

4 months

FURIOSA really makes it plain to me why I'll always prefer film to TV as a storytelling medium. The stuff that Miller's film treats as ellipses (the Wasteland War, Furiosa's training, her childhood at the Citadel) would have been multi-episode/seasonal arcs on TV

39

177

3K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

3 months

"she's cool and all, but dating is really cutting into my fuzzy hat budget so..."

7

36

3K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

There's so much art out there it would be impossible to even acquaint yourself w/ a fraction of it in a lifetime. It's the height of arrogance to say "I haven't heard of this so it must suck." What you know is the stars in the sky; what you don't is the darkness between them

10

265

3K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

4 months

@Abertuca64 Yeah, Dwayne's a close second in the "can't pick a good script to save his life" department

29

10

3K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

1 month

Seeing this video pop for days on here and I finally watched it unmuted and the disconnect between the frenetic imagery & the actual song is bizarre. Like you could sail a container ship in the gulf between them

Chris Osborn

@Chris_Osborn

1 month

like this shit is just insane, SPW incorporating these textures into huge pop videos is so exciting, finally some good fucking food

20

195

4K

26

99

3K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

8 months

Also made me think of the whole Somerton debacle. When you have to produce that much content consistently to appease an ever-fickle, churning audience, of course you're going to resort to corner-cutting like A.I. tools and outright theft. It's why you shouldn't be THAT prolific

3

78

3K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

Jim Davis could be a straight-up serial killer and we'll never know. Dude was smart enough to realize that a mega money idea like "fat cat who likes lasagna" rolls around once in a lifetime and he's not about to let politics or anything else derail that gravy train

16

254

2K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

4 years

@kasi_Irving Why does this discourse persist when we're currently living through the most sexless era of mainstream filmmaking?

17

63

2K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

8 months

How does your brain go "there's a paranormal fish hospital" and then immediately decide "but that's not really interesting" Forget the Hero's Journey shit- let's figure out what an MRI machine for squids looks like

6

72

2K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

@HannahGraceLong Tom Cruise matter-of-factly saying he was born with jet fuel in his blood is the most Tom Cruise thing he could possibly say

1

16

2K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

8 months

@PetreRaleigh I did retail for 10 years and the BIGGEST quality of life difference transitioning to office/email jobs was having a predictable schedule every week. Took so much stress off my life, it was crazy

7

55

2K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

3 months

@MattJFarthing It’s also the only sequel film that’s worth a damn, so that tracks

13

10

2K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

I suspect part of the reason why nerds are salty about AVATAR is cause they know Cameron doesn't respect them. He's never going to do a "I do this for the Avatar fam" promo at a con. This is a guy who tells studio execs to swing from his nuts; he cannot be Rose Tico'd.

18

154

2K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 months

The virgin Criterion versus the chad small labels

25

184

2K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

8 months

And I'm not trying to be a dick here, honestly, but this part in particular made me shake my head. How could you not want to describe THIS? "Plot" is so much more boring than describing what a luxury high-end PARANORMAL FISH HOSPITAL FOR MERPEOPLE looks like

11

60

2K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

@punished_cait The day Trump got COVID. We celebrated on here like they just blew up the second Death Star

5

23

2K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

8 months

"the fish tanks are high-end" what, are there like gold flakes in there? Is the gravel made out of diamonds? Gucci filtration system? How high-end we talking here?

7

37

2K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 months

The Ian Holm thing is the ugliest, cheapest "Remember this guy" nostalgia slop an IP has pulled yet. Disgusting stuff, and it's embarrassing to see people on here & elsewhere defend it

124

97

2K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

Nations will become destabilized as goth refugees flee to cooler climates to hold goth dance nights in the few cities left on earth able to safely accommodate PVC fetish gear

2

63

1K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

@fellawhomstdve Loved the post-credits stinger where Eggers addresses the camera: "If you're wondering what my stance is when it comes to locking women, children, and the elderly in a building and setting it on fire, let me be perfectly clear: it fucking rocks."

3

35

1K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

The Amazon and Bauhaus concerts- two life-enriching, endangered ecosystems that capitalism run amuck will wipe from the face of the earth.

1

47

1K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

When you want to be the entire world, you will hate anyone who points over your borders and go "hey, there's more here." So they marshal the language of social justice to put their culture-annihilating behemoth on the side of the angels & people w/ the memories of goldfish buy it

3

95

1K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

If aliens came to our planet and asked us to show them the pinnacle of human achievement, it is clearly The Goth Babe that is the culmination of our genius. Imagine a world w/ no goths: we'd have to show them nerd shit like Vivaldi or the Fibonacci sequence instead. Embarrassing

6

107

1K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

9 months

Look how old they are, dawg. Let them sleep, for Christ's sake. Find some other piece of art that is actually worth the inordinate obsession you offer up to a film where Danny Ayks gets sloppy-toppy so good from a ghost his eyes roll back

14

33

1K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

3 months

@twonnet

luke

@lukeoneil47

3 months

what the fuck

76

431

3K

13

15

1K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

8 months

Never thought I'd see the day where libertarianism's strongest soldier goes AWOL

David Roberts

@drvolts

8 months

Ha! Speaking of libertarianism, here's famed comedian Penn Jillette:

103

966

5K

3

150

1K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

You don't have to monitor the melting of the polar ice caps to understand the severity of our present situation- simply find someone in a Siouxsie and The Banshees shirt and see how quickly their mascara runs when they step outside

1

56

1K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

I'm not saying it was a deliberate choice on their part but one of the more insidious consequences of Marvel waiting after dozens of films to feature women & POC leads is that they diversified right at the point where audience burnout w/ these movies was going to be inevitable

12

159

1K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

4 months

@AlexSeverino4 Caine- like Malcolm McDowell- comes from the British school of "If it pays, I'll play." They've all been in a ton of shit BUT they've also been in enough certifiable classics throughout their career that it all evens out

9

6

1K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

8 months

@PetreRaleigh It's funny how she talks about how uncomfortable she felt doing corporate work & I can respect that, but it really seems like she pivoted into a much worse gig.

6

12

1K

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

4 months

@JeremyTColes @Mrs_Klaws Because I watch movies and I like to watch good ones whenever possible?

11

1

998

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

@benedict_rs People are so desperate to believe that this is all a sudden aberration and not a long, rotted strand in the country's DNA stretching back to McCarthy and the Confederancy and the witch trials and and and

3

47

950

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

One of my most deeply held aesthetic convictions is that all narrative art should have a Tom Bombadil- some fun & mysterious "extra piece" in the puzzlebox that doesn't seem to connect to anything & is there for the hell of it. A loose end to drive scholars & stans alike insane

15

148

981

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

1 year

The entire French right wing in 1979 after Serge dropped AUX ARMES ET CAETERA:

2

45

989

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

Thinking about auteurs I could beat in a fight. Del Toro? Squash his ass 100%. Decimate both Andersons, no problem. Lynch too busy meditating or drinking a milkshake, so that'd be one-sided. Any mumblecore director other than Swanberg: WASHED. Ferrera? They'd never find my body

14

140

937

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

4 months

@stephens_ben

6

0

902

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

Eventually the high of mainlining Criterions wears off and you have to go to the harder shit- your Vinegar Syndromes, your Euro-sleaze, giallos, etc. But then that high wears off and you must resort to licking toads to get that rush: your Stecklers, Milligans, Wishmans

6

30

815

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

1 year

I would much rather live a life so interesting & debauched it would get the guys who wanted to murder DeGaulle to transfer their aggro onto me for jamming w/ Sly & Robbie for a few weeks than live to a 140 by having to go to bed before 8pm every night

4

24

823

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

3 months

@TheWerdup

0

3

823

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

8 months

@KolleenCarney There's almost no way anyone can write a GOOD book under duress in eight weeks unless they're a god-tier writing talent or they're a pulp writer living between 1940-1980 & jacked up on enough trucker speed to kill a bull elephant

13

18

807

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

9 months

I’m just saying, if Ghostbusters happened in the real world that’s all anyone would ever talk about. Ray would not be able to take five steps away from his front door without somebody asking him how the head was

6

29

792

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

3 months

@MALTSCHLITZMANN more like city plop amirite

3

2

761

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

For all the folks in the comments going "but Marty IS a gatekeeper":

1

34

720

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

4 years

Legit hilarious that the whole Mulholland Drive "This is the girl" plotline happened during the shooting of Justice League but instead of a director being bullied into casting an actress it's Ray Fisher and "Booyah"

4

76

718

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

5 years

TFW you see Amanda Palmer is trending

3

93

700

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

Also nerds whine about Avatar because it's an original IP w/ no other pre-existing source material like comics, so they can't lord over any canonical knowledge over people or have any grist for fan theory spinning. They just have to wait for the next one like every other schmuck

5

70

678

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

Watching this starting to pick up numbers with mounting dread like that bit from THE CRITIC where the Jurassic Park kids watch a raptor pick the lock of the door they're hiding behind

3

615

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

3 years

@jessehawken Still one of the most brutally accurate observations on U.S culture

4

23

585

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

Sorry, folks, teens dressing up like they're going to the opera to see MINIONS 2 is extremely funny. Gotta give the youth credit, it's a killer bit

2

23

592

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

@Blochead4real @CornOnTheGoblin There's nothing funny about accidents in the workplace

2

572

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

1 year

Still think best/most absurd Oppenheimer discourse were the folks complaining about lack of representation in the casting. Folks, the invention of the bomb is in the top 5 worst things our species has ever done. You don't want this L. Let the whites eat all the shit on this one

6

49

565

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

3 years

@jasondashbailey THEM: Wow, the largest archive of human knowledge and culture, right at my fingertips. Crazy. Maybe I should look into some stuff... *pause* THEM:

2

16

529

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

While I'd rather have a cinema full of 30-50 Crimes Of The Futures, if we're trapped on this "spend an entire nation's resources on this shit" blockbuster model I'd rather they be made by megalomaniacal auteurs like Big Jim & Tom Scientology than by an algorithm's Renfield

4

37

538

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

And with great solemnity I must hit the "mute" button *salutes* Godspeed, comments section

2

521

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

3 months

@uberbikegeek @twonnet Now THIS would be an effective anti-drug PSA.

2

1

527

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

10 months

Just got out of “The Boy and the Heron”—still gathering my thoughts but immediate first impressions is that a parakeet must have shit on Miyazaki’s car right after he gave it a loving, lengthy waxing. Not since Hitchcock have we seen an auteur say FUCK BIRDS with his whole chest

5

44

516

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

And I think part of the appeal of Avatar/Top Gun is that they're big popcorn stories being told by people who REALLY want to tell them, who aren't stuck in that fan service "you like this right? this is the content YOU want" Disney otherwise employs. They're not For The Fans

4

28

491

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

3 years

@BarrenMagazine @JasonDRamsey This is like a jazz magazine canning their editor for having the temerity to suggest that jazz is no longer a part of the cultural zeitgeist

7

6

474

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

GLASS REPAIR GUY IN POLICE STORY UNIVERSE, 1985: I may have to close the shop, fellas, business is terrible lately. We need a miracle to turn things around EMPLOYEE (runs in): Boss! Boss! You won't believe what just happened at the shopping mall

5

87

479

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

As someone who's recently ordered a bunch of Doris Wishman box sets, I am very much in my "sniffing-glue just to feel something" phase. No hope for me now

8

11

468

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

For the love of God, someone please Old Yeller this site. Show some mercy

15

33

473

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

@Gonezap It took them 10+ movies to get to the point where they were comfortable making a black man the star of one of their franchise films when BLADE did it back in 1998 and was a better popcorn movie than pretty much anything Disney's made since.

6

9

466

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

4 months

e-girl & her podracer boyfriend

Mr. Chau

@Srirachachau

4 months

38

321

5K

0

23

474

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

1 year

The most psychic damage I took during the pandemic was realizing my deeply ingrained belief that humanity would come together, make necessary sacrifices, & find our way out of climate change was a total pipe dream after watching people lose their fucking minds over masks

9

91

462

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

8 months

@PetreRaleigh And it's also the sheer indignity of being an adult and having to ask for permission to have a life outside work. "Please, sir, may I have this day off in three weeks so I can do this thing I've been looking forward to for mont-" "NO"

5

23

466

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

3 months

@RaxKingIsDead Euron Greyjoy's glow-down from "Terrifying warlock pirate king in magic armor who turns people into living ship figureheads" to "guy who looks like he gave every wench at the Ren Fair chlamydia"

6

462

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

3 years

EMBATTLED DIRECTOR, CIRCA 1990: final cut plz EMBATTLED DIRECTOR, CIRCA 2021: please let me take the camera outside for an hour

0

38

430

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

9 months

@okimstillhungry Losing it over the guy saying "He's very excited, he has climaxed!" like he's doing play-by-play commentary

1

2

430

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

7 months

BRADLEY COOPER (seething): you sons of bitches, you drooling simpletons, you motherfuckers, you drove me to this, you made me do this- *smashes emergency glass holding a LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL remake script* ciao i will winna da Oscar if it-a kills me buono

4

27

435

The Abominable Emperor Norton

@ashleynaftule

2 years

Amazon spent the GDP of an entire nation to produce a LOTR show where Sauron looks like a malnourished Eminem

9

79

399