Willie Griswold @WillieGriswold Twitter profile

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

Thanksgiving is at my house this year so now everybody else has to go for a walk while I smoke weed

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

Willie Griswold

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

I just got an invite to my hs reunion but I won’t feel comfortable going until I’m vaccinated, successful and have a six pack

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

2 years

My dad called me a moron at 6:05 AM. How’s your morning going?

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

Happy birthday dad!! You’re a great dad and I’m so happy you’re not on Twitter!

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

Sex is cool but have u ever done laundry on the last day of vacation and gone home with clean clothes?

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

I love exercising in the morning. Now I have all day to smoke cigarettes and eat cured meats.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

This girl I made out with one time in 2013 just got engaged and it’s like did you forget about everything we had? Bullshit.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

2 years

Drinking a shower beer, eating wings before noon and betting on preseason football. I love self care.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

Family sticks together until I’m the only one who doesn’t have TSA precheck

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

The monster I see when I close my eyes at night

The BOB & TOM Show

@bobandtom

4 years

Tune in now to hear about Tom’s weekend and proper sun protection.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

1 year

This Saturday I get to open for Jeff Foxworthy. It's a big deal. It's a night I'II never forget. It's not totally clear why I'm using this photo to promote it, but I had to promote it and I really wanted to share this photo. Ticket link in bio / below. Go Colts.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

Another five star review...

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

A terrifying window into my future

The BOB & TOM Show

@bobandtom

4 years

Tom spent the evening ironing his jeans ... outside.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

My Dad and Uncle Chick brought me onstage with my buddy @JeffOskay and my godfather @PatGodwin all so we could raise money to send kids to my old camp. I’m a lucky guy.

The BOB & TOM Show

@bobandtom

3 years

On stage now: @WillieGriswold

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

If someone looks / smells high, don’t call them out in front of family. Just get them a damn cookie and say Merry Christmas.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

Happy to announce that I’m going to become the midwest’s first fat white rapper and make everybody call me Machine Gun Belly

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

About to fly to LA to cover the super bowl for @bobandtom with @FunnyCostaki and I think I may try this marijuana everyone keeps telling me about

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

just got so high I googled “tandem bikes for one”

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

Apparently a side effect of the vaccine is DoorDashing $42 worth of skyline chili

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

Got in a yelling match w my family in front of a busy brunch spot 🎶It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas 🎶

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

2 years

I’m in Lexington, KY. I just ate a delicious hot brown and the colts are up 30 against the Vikings. I’m never gonna die.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

This morning I tweeted my name and got 1000 likes. Let’s see if this show promo for tomorrow night in Indy can get at least 30

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

Pursuit of Slappyness

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

2 years

The first picture I have of me doing stand up. I was a year in and I would get nervous and hold the mic with two hands. Next week is my first ever headlining weekend a comedy club. Dubuque, grab a ticket at the link in my bio. I’ll hold the mic with one hand - I promise.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

2 years

I know that the Colts picked up Gardner Minshew. I have gotten no less than 10 messages, tweets and texts. Please respect me and my family’s privacy at this time.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

Month of May in Indy. I don’t think I’ll get a sunburn tomorrow, but I’m still gonna drink six light beers before noon!

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

People are getting vaccinated, comedy clubs are opening up and I can’t wait to get back to my favorite thing in the world: smoking weed with the sound guy.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

My five year old sister is crying because she wants a cookie but she doesn’t want to move and I totally get what she’s going through

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

2 years

Cincinnati tomorrow. Gonna have a three way.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

2 years

Whenever I go skiing, I run out of breath, I strain my hamstring and manage to pull an abdominal muscle. Then after I’m done putting my boots I get my ass kicked on the mountain too. Merry Christmas.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

Having sisters much younger than you Con: people thinking I’m their dad Pro: finishing their sandwiches

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

I’ve had to stand up and sit down so much at the Colts game for people to grab beer. I feel like I’m at a Catholic wedding.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

A poorly timed nap can fuck up your whole weekend

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

Forgot I got drunk and made this my Hinge picture

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

The future may be uncertain, but I’m ABSOLUTELY coming out of this pointing like Paulie Walnuts

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

I hope that Eddie Van Halen, John Prine and the guy from Fountains of Wayne form the weirdest band heaven has ever seen

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

2 years

My little sister got a skateboard for Christmas. Guess she was on the gnarly list. 🤙🤙

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

I just want to lose enough weight that you can’t always tell where my belly button is

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

2 years

Me and the boys getting absolutely loco this wknd

Ronald McDuffin

@RMcduffin

2 years

Willie is a bad influence

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

My Uber driver just told me he gave Tom Hanks a ride to the airport one time. I wonder if Tom Hanks also thought this guy talked too much...

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

This morning I went to the farmers market with my grandma and now I’m gonna drink 9 beers in 3 hours. That’s balance.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

1 year

I gotta stop smoking before I get my haircut. I was just trying to make small talk and my high ass asked my barber what he did for a living.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

I turn 29 in less than a month and I’m gonna have a party with drinks, pills and powder (electrolyte water, heartburn medication and Metamucil)

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

What do I post on Facebook that says I’m back in my hometown and willing to make out with nearly anyone without looking too desperate?

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

For Christmas I’m asking my mom to unfollow my ex

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

2 years

Jeff Saturday may not be the most experienced coach in the NFL. But it looks like he fixed the O Line and I think I have a crush on him.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

I am thankful for my family and the seven family group texts we have so my family doesn’t get mad at members of my family who are talking shit about other members of my family.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

I’m trying to broaden my horizons, so I enrolled in an art class where you paint big titties

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

I got skyline before the early show so now I’m back at the hotel using the bathroom before the late show.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

I hate to say I told you so, but the kids still got it

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

Who was the singer in The Jimi Hendrix Experience?

The Chick McGee

@chickmcgee1

4 years

"What's the name of the dog in Scooby Doo.....?" Tom...moments ago.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

Ordering Dave & Busters on DoorDash. Gonna put “please enjoy a game of air hockey for me” in the special instructions.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

What you need to make 2021 better than 2020

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

1 year

Between the King’s Coronation and the Kentucky Derby, this will be the biggest weekend for silly hats since the debut of Devo. Pray for the eccentric milliner in your life.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

I’m “tomorrow I might fuck around at the container store and tackle a few projects” years old

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

Greg Hahn is one of the funniest people on earth and I get to open for him I’m the land of bourbon. I’m a lucky guy.

Greg Hahn

@Hahncomedy

4 years

Louuuuuuuuuuisville, KY 40 millionth time there. This time is already my fav. See you at the club or in surrounding spirit serving establishments. ⁦ @WillieGriswold ⁩ also on show. The Caravan | Greg Hahn

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

5 years

If you’re feeling lonely about self isolating remember: everyone who hasn’t texted you since this started never wants to see you again and never liked you anyway

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

1 year

Drinking at an airport bar playing Come Sail Away. I may cry, I might sing, I could get in a fist fight. The airport bar is my oyster.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

I get why conspiracy theories are popular. This is what happens when you tell a whole generation that there’s a secret map on the back of the Declaration of Independence...

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

Can’t wait to get home so I can get takeout from Skyline before the super bowl

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

Finally forgot and tried to buy beer on a Sunday morning in Indiana! Thank God they stopped me. Things were getting a little too convenient around here.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

2 years

My buddy just fucked up so bad with his girlfriend she blocked me on social media

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

I have a hard time telling the barber what style of haircut I want, but my friend told me to just bring in a pic of a handsome actor w the cut I want. Easy.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

Drinking bourbon is cool until I say yuck and chase it with Diet Coke

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

I just got a craving for Taco Bell’s spicy potato soft taco (removed from the menu) and now I finally understand why people care ab extinct animals

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

❤️❤️❤️

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

Flying from Colorado to Indiana always feels like a ripoff. Leaving skiing and great weed for the land of delta 8, cheap cigs and Garfield. Alright nvm Indiana still rules.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

From now on I’m only doing shows that are within five miles of a restaurant featured on Diners, Drive ins and Dives

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

Always fun doing a segment on @bobandtom Thanks for the back up @chickmcgee1

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

Hardest part of getting into beach volleyball is finding at least three other people that want to get into beach volleyball

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

Steven A Smith Michael B Jordan John C Reilly ... John F Kennedy One day I’ll learn the whole middle name alphabet

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

I don’t know if I miss having a girlfriend or I just like to lie about smoking cigarettes

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

@bobkevoian @bobandtom ❤️❤️❤️

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

1 year

Jean shorts, baby.

The BOB & TOM Show

@bobandtom

1 year

Are you going to the Indianapolis Motor Speedway for the first time and unsure what to wear? @WillieGriswold shares a few tips. @IMS #IndyCar #Indy500

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

If I get drunk and talk about starting a podcast one more time I may have to quit drinking

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

I was saving up for a treadmill but now I’m using that money to buy Spanx for men

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

2 years

Is Jeff Saturday’s beard more gray? He aged more in six games than most presidents do in eight years. Looking like Tim Allen 25 minutes into the Santa Claus.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

2 years

Places you can watch a 37 year old get his ass kicked: Your local UFC gym Smash Mouth concert Any Colts game this season

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

In 2021 I will not slide into girls DMs while drunk. Gonna get it all out if the way this afternoon.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

You get drunk and DM girls, I get drunk and DM Lance Stephenson telling him how much the city of Indy loves him. We are not the same.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

I’ve been working out and eating right for about a week now and if I don’t see results soon I’m gonna start snorting Parmesan cheese like it’s cocaine

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

This is actually the silent majority

Mary H

@LilMissMaryK

4 years

I am a happily married woman, but DAMM do I find @WillieGriswold sexy 😍

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

I’ve gotten so used to working out at home, I really don’t think I could work out at the gym anymore. I mean do they even let you hit your Vape pen in between sets?

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

My friend keeps taking care of his baby instead of playing video games with me I’m starting to think he doesn’t want this damn baby to ever become an elite gamer

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

None of my siblings liked my international siblings day post so I think I’m gonna make some noise in the family group chat

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

1 year

Later I’m gonna go to Kroger and get ingredients for what will basically be a philly chopped cheese steak. I think I’m gonna use hot dog buns. I’ll keep y’all posted.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

3 years

Got in fights with four family members in the last week. Starting to think I may be the problem. Only one way to find out. (black out and talk about Jimmy Carter)

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold

4 years

I’m not gambling like a degenerate. I’m supporting college athletics and stimulating the economy.

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Willie Griswold

@WillieGriswold