Todd @Themasterpeach Twitter profile

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Todd

3 years

"Friendly reminder-" "I think it's funny that-" "Really great how-" "I love having to-" "It rocks when-" "Super jazzed about-"

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Last Seen Profiles

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

7 months

You gutless fucking coward

Elmo

@elmo

7 months

When both teams are red, it's hard for Elmo to pick which team to root for. Elmo will cheer for both! ❤️

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

7 months

*6 year old me showing social worker my action figures* This is Randy Orton. This Undertaker. Here's Rey Mysterio. He's small but I like him best. Social worker: do you like living just with your mom? Me: *through gritted teeth* mom says I can't play with Chris Benoit anymore

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

9 months

Once at a family dinner my dad referred to himself as a "vagatarian" at a restaurant and my mom was so upset she took a taxi home.

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

6 months

Me to the strangers I just met at the bar when I'm 9 deep

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

2 months

Hey just so you know me and the guys are talking about killing you

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

2 years

The EMTs saw my penis and told the ambulance to drive me to the Children's Hospital

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

9 months

Kissinger in Hell: The pendulum of scorn and praise is ever-swinging, young man. Those who condemn me enjoyed the fruits of my labor. In 100 years, my ultimate legacy will be my work with China far more than Cambodia. Mac Miller looking guy from Euphoria: what is you talmbout

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

11 months

Nice group of friends bro, it'd be a real shame if the twin forces of time and circumstance were to erode your connections and turn you all into strangers

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

2 years

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

6 months

Blue Whale that's bleeding :/

Nick Kapur

@nick_kapur

6 months

This data is absolutely insane, if true. Basically every category of meeting one's romantic partner is diving toward zero and getting eaten by online.

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

1 year

Jon

@BiggestttHater

1 year

what is y’all most liked tweet?

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

9 months

@collin0scopy The youngest people to play the Wii when it came out are still teenagers lol

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

8 months

@RevDocBobSac The antisemites have really ruined the profound, life-affirming silliness of the whole situation

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

7 months

@XboXb0ss "Elmo thinks it's a complicated issue" my gun will make it less complicated you furry freak

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

7 months

Making deepfakes of my father hugging me

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

7 months

We're watching a master at work

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

3 years

@catholicdad420 The yesss really brings it home

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

10 days

Oh. That's Gore. My comfort character...

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

11 months

@jestingtime There's a strange contingent of people that think they can "win" therapy

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

1 month

I have wronged my Lyft driver and I'm going to pay

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

9 months

Typed this so hard I cracked my screen

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

2 years

Getting blown and making Foghorn Leghorn noises like "I say I say!"

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

11 months

Hidden reply lol

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

11 months

I need girls to understand I am not flirting I am just being rude

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

7 months

Doing this to my uncircumcised friends

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

1 year

@jestingtime *31 year old Grad student whose parents are paying his tuition* ok dude sure lmao, he died of "cancer"

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

8 months

@mmoskvit @shaunasforestbb You're right I cannot understand a Scottish person thinking they're indigenous to Palestine

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

11 months

@CocoDeAqua @BurnerDontask I came on all of it though

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

2 years

We're bringing this energy into 2022 kings. Call their bluff, never fold. You've got this.

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

2 years

@lilmoike You could probably get a quart of tallow out of that hand

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

5 months

Talking to my 9 year old nephew: you will experience such unimaginable joy in your life Talking to my 11 year old nephew: it doesn't always get better. Some of us are fucked Talking to my 13 year old nephew: stop saying that word in rap songs man we're not allowed to

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

3 years

@helen Watching Seinfeld was my Afghanistan

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

16 days

@duns_sc0tus every Southern artist was Woodie Guthrie mixed with Pete Seeger precisely up to the point Reagan was elected

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

1 month

If the chips were down, Fritz would end any of you without a second thought

Cincinnati Zoo

@CincinnatiZoo

1 month

Fritz being silly!

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

6 months

The reviews are in ✍️:

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

2 years

@PILL0WPET @jewbyboobie @PokeMasterMegan @aliencrisps autumntism is a serious condition 😔

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

5 months

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

5 months

Posting my son's suicide to r/MildlyInfuriating

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

3 years

@N3rdsInBlack @intelSEBASTIAN @DanHopp Please go back to reddit with this type of bullshit.

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

7 months

50 y/o guy with a limp dick realizing he's on the wrong edtwt

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

6 months

Shot/chaser

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

3 years

You intermittent fasting I'm in her guts blasting 💯

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

2 years

I've sucked cocks you wouldn't believe...

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

1 year

@SkinnyTuna Video of the guy reading this an all time classic

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

3 years

@felixfromchapo Imagining how badly he'd fuck up trying to catch a football

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

8 months

@ItsJotJot @jeremylovesyall Spielberg and Zemeckis are great friends I'm sure there was some influence there

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

3 years

@catholicdad420 Every time I see one these tweets I think "this can't possibly resonate with actual human beings" and then I click and without fail it will have tens of thousands of likes.

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

8 months

@ThreePercentage @feverdreamfairy @EnZoStockton @RxRedpill @Kevinverted A woman has never talked to you

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

9 months

@EitanChitayat @soveryisraeli I'm fucking Eitan's wife, actually

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

3 years

Telling my dying son "Reddit is down the hall and to the left" because he picked wanting to meet Ryan Reynolds as his Make-A-Wish request.

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

3 years

@polishXcellence @allahliker The last good one was the twisted tea can smack.

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

2 years

"Men can't be sexually harassed" #MeToo

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

2 years

Monkey Poxxers in the house tonight

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

1 year

@jestingtime The Master

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

3 years

@ByYourLogic They're gonna kill his imaginary family for character development aren't they

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

3 years

@archivesdork @Trillburne He doesn't really get why Boston has its own baseball team when it's essentially a suburb of New York, and New York already has 2 teams. Just root for the Yankees or Mets if you live in Boston

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

2 years

"I promise I won't get political" *me after a single person from New England talks to me*

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

1 year

Britney acting insanely mentally ill and her fans being like "you don't know what she's been through! Let her slay!!" Is honestly a great bit

Daily Loud

@DailyLoud

1 year

Britney Spears was reportedly speaking with a British accent when approaching Victor Wembanyama

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

1 year

I tell ya, my pals are calling me a cuck in the groupchat. They're saying I'd let them have sex with my wife. I'm like "Hey fellas, she don't even like it when you boys come over for dinner!"

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

3 years

@felixfromchapo I remember when I first heard this on YouTube when i was 15 I was like "what is this gay bullshit" even though I kept on hitting repeat as soon as the song was done

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

11 months

Looking back on three days ago when we were all doing the AI thing. Why did I make this

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

7 months

Obligatory

Todd

@Themasterpeach

7 months

You gutless fucking coward

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@Themasterpeach

3 years

@AwesomePhone @N3rdsInBlack @intelSEBASTIAN @DanHopp

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@Themasterpeach

2 years

How I will continue to act for the rest of my life

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

1 year

@Richard57941301 Brother got a 2nd chance and is making sure he won't get a third

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

5 months

@RuckCohlchez I like Rachel Dratch but she would not have worked at all in this role

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

2 years

@jestingtime The "oh man..." at the start. He knew he was about to go in and he wanted to give us time to prepare.

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

3 years

@catholicdad420 Why do these people always look the same.

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

12 days

Texting my best friend

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

5 months

ydoj

@wnbagirlfriend

5 months

unemployment helped me discover my passion for liquor

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@Themasterpeach

2 years

@Richard57941301 I thought the first two screenshots were related

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

1 year

*taking out my penis* "for five long years, your father had this dick, up his ass, and now, it's my responsibility to give it to you"

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

2 years

The divorce really hitting Fantano hard

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

3 years

@TylerIAm Famously voiceless vaccine deniers

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

6 months

@TylerIAm Not a single slit seen so none of 'em

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

6 months

@largemotorcycle You wouldn't want to disappoint him

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

11 months

@jestingtime I miss seq. Can't believe he was killed in the chaz

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

3 years

@RuckCohlchez @lunch_enjoyer @lucasvlogan It was 2006 you could just call him gay

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

5 months

Devastating: mutual with great tweets is terrible in groupchats.

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

3 years

Meet my best twitter friend. His @ is child_endangerer and he's on his 4th account for saying slurs and sending death threats. All he does is quote tweet teens posting bad mental health takes with the phrase "I'm inside your house." He's honestly the biggest sweetheart I know.

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

3 years

@intrnetdaughter Being older gen Z means I caught both ends of this lmao

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

3 years

@DragonflyJonez People's all over the world had their first English words be the lyrics to Billie Jean. Not ever happening with Passionfruit.

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

6 months

Hell yeah

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@Themasterpeach

11 months

Much like with Patton's first wife, he made the decision for both of us that I will never interact with him again

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

3 years

@ijustbluemyself Damn that's gonna fall on him

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@Themasterpeach

9 months

People always tryna steal ur shine its crazy

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

2 years

You worried about Elden Ring? How bout calling your grandma, she's lonely and would love to hear from you, her phone Seldom Rings.

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@Themasterpeach

3 years

@ADrugResearcher @Trillburne That crazy bastard Ebert gave this four stars. Miss him every day

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@Themasterpeach

2 years

@DAVIDPLEASESTOP SOMEONE GET THIS MAN SOME TOP

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@Themasterpeach

11 months

@jestingtime Crying Yakub has incredible avi potential

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

1 year

Sitting on the cuck chair backwards like a cool guidance counselor 😎

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

8 months

I've sucked dicks so long they call them Richards 💯

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@Themasterpeach

8 months

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@Themasterpeach

3 years

@DragonflyJonez C'mon man lmao

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@Themasterpeach

3 years

@catholicdad420 That's why he's our most important artist.

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@Themasterpeach

1 month

Person on here that's 31 talking to a 22 year old in chats: oh is that a widdle baby? You have homework due tomorrow champ! Same person in their DMs: you're so mature for your age. I could start over with you. I could do it right this time.

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

9 months

We often hear "Is Pepsi ok?" In restaurants, but most of us never bother to ask her.

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

1 year

@shrimp_delight I kept liking @RepMTG 's posts

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Todd

@Themasterpeach

3 years

Fuck horror comedies. There's nothing funny about a ghost. That shit's terrifying.

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