Streatham Rovers Football Club @StreathamRovers Twitter profile

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

1 month

Following the news that the League Committee have decreed that the Oxted Villa v Smeeth St. Mary match will be awarded as a 2-0 home win following its 76th minute abandonment due to a medical emergency we can now confirm WE HAVE CLINCHED 11th PLACE IN THE XTERMIN8 PREMIER #SRFC

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

The thoughts of all at Streatham Rovers Football Club are with the American people on this, the 21st anniversary of the horrific events of 9/11.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

5 years

Here's the teamsheet for tonight's game and we are absolutely furious because Sydenham have fielded their players to spell out "SRFC ARE SHIT". We know this for a fact because Dane Francis, a striker, is wearing number 3. Hope the league committee throw the book at them for this.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

8 months

🕙 PITCH INSPECTION There will be a pitch inspection at 10 o'clock this morning following a complication that occured during the installation of our giant Remembrance poppy on the Vale Terrace stand. We will keep you updated. #SRFC

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

To everyone having a go at us for this I'd just like to humbly remind you that it wasn't Streatham Rovers Football Club that hijacked a bunch of airplanes and flew them into buildings. A bit of perspective here wouldn't go amiss. We consider this the end of the matter.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

8 months

PLAYER DEPARTURE We can confirm that Steven Oakwell has been released following his refusal to condemn Hamas during a teambuilding LaserQuest exercise. We thank Steven for his efforts during his short stint at the Greyhound Lane stadium and wish him well in his future career.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

6 years

OFFICIAL REQUEST: Can the person leaving dreadful karaoke recordings of 'I Wanna Sex You Up' on the answering machine of our club committee chairman Derek Connor's answering machine please cease immediately.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

7 months

We awake to find this vile graffito painted on Club property on the outside of the Greyhound Lane stadium. This will cost us THOUSANDS to fix. We have reported it to the Metropolitan Police as a suspected hate crime - especially given current tensions in the Middle East. #SRFC

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

To every idiot claiming we've got the wrong date: do you have any idea how offensive you're being? How about you get off the internet and get yourself some friends you sad little freaks.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

Okay - we did actually get the date wrong. And we apologise for that. But ultimately that shouldn't be allowed to distract from what was a genuine and heartfelt memorial message.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

8 years

ANNOUNCEMENT: Unfortunately there won't be live updates of today's match versus Gatwick Athletic as Barry has been kicked out by his wife.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

Thanks for the follow Parachute Regiment FC @3PARAFC ! Ordinarily we'd be interested in arranging a friendly match as we have a gap in our schedule, but unfortunately you shot one of our player's grandfathers and left him permenantly disabled so the lads are against the idea.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

6 years

ANNOUNCEMENT: Unfortunately our 2018/19 home kit will not be released until the new season has already started after a rival fan seemingly infiltrated the manufacturer's graphic design department and soiled the shirts with a foul-mouthed sublimated pinstripe.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

3 years

Sad to report that some troublemaking idiot has broken into our ground and sprayed this nonsense on the wall beside the outside toilets. We've had a look and this is a 12 year old tweet by Phillip Schofield. Completely inexplicable act of vandalism. Police are on their way.

Phillip Schofield

@Schofe

15 years

YAY...... Home made soup for supper. Back later if I can. Have a good evening.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

11 months

@NUFC Great gesture 👏👏👏👏👏 Sure lots of your fans will beheading to these fixtures ⚽

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

In the increasingly likely event of @ChelseaFC being liquidated as a result of freezes placed on Russian financial assets we would like to offer all Chelsea 2021/22 season ticket holders free entry to Streatham Rovers Football Club matches on presentation of their season ticket.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

4 months

We wanted to alert the wider football community to this. Over the last few months we have paid Tactidata a four-figure fee to produce heatmap visualisation videos of our games but it recently came to our attention they were in fact just using clips from the 1987 movie 'Predator'.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

1 year

@LutonTown Have some self-respect for christ's sake

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

3 years

@GaryLineker Gary you should block these trolls instead of engaging with them. It only encourages yet more cyberhooliganism from these little friendless cyberthugs - no doubt sat day and night sat in a bedroom surrounded by an odd number of foul "man-encrusted" socks. Just awful.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

3 years

@FootyRustling This is an infringement of our intellectual property. If you don't delete this within 24 hours our lawyer Oliver Laughdugry ( @sarah_ox_laugh : he's currently using his deceased wife's twitter account after being suspended for issuing death threats) will commence legal proceedings.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

Look for the avoidance of doubt we use a different way of writing dates in Britain. This wasn't some ridiculous mistake by the Football Club/me, it was an honest mistake. Write your dates however you like but we in England INVENTED the concept of time so you're in the wrong here.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

3 years

@thequentinletts A lot of people are doubting the accuracy of this but we're a football club and can confirm that this happens with our youth teams. They've also banned the phrase "throw-in" because it sounds a bit like "throne" and upsets Irish republicans. You really couldn't make it up.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

1 year

Happy #StPatrickDay to all our supporters ☘️ To celebrate, and for one day only, our Club Badge will wear the historic sash of the Emerald Isle's famous The Orange Order organisation. Top of the morning to you all! #SRFC #UpTheGreyhounds #NeverStopNotGivingUp #StPatricksDay2023

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

3 years

THIS ACCOUNT HAS BEEN HACKED BY #ENYAFANS4COMMUNISM AND WE WILL NOT GIVE IT BACK TO STREATHAM ROVERS UNTIL THEY RE-FORM THE WOMEN'S TEAM THEY LIQUIDATED IN 2015 TO FUND SIGNING AN INJURY PRONE EX-LEAGUE STRIKER WHO MADE LESS THAN TWENTY APPEARANCES IN 5 YEARS. MERRY CHRISTMAS 🎄

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

The Club Committee Chairman has requested we tweet a link to the webshop where you can purchase our 2022/23 home shirt, and point out that they ship to America so if you thought our memorial was #ATouchOfClass you can show your support by buying one 👍

Streatham Rovers FC VOMIT SportsWear 2022/23 Home Shirt

Get ready for the new season with the Official Streatham Rovers Football Club 2022/23 Home Shirt from VOMIT SportsWear. Featuring a woven club...

bastardosports.bigcartel.com

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

6 months

#ChristmasMemories In 1980 eight year old Kevin Watson is rewarded for his performances for the Streatham Rovers Under 9s 'A' team before a festive period senior men's fixture by being reunited with his estranged mother he had been told died in a car crash two years prior. #SRFC

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

5 years

Just a reminder that the club has a zero tolerance policy on something for nothing chancers.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

3 years

The Sun got in touch with the club asking for permission to use one of our photographs so we let them know EXACTLY what we think of their newspaper. #SRFC #UpTheGreyhounds

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

✍️ We are delighted to announce the signing of midfielder Lucas Dalton-Bandini ⚽️ He brings versatility & experience to our squad for the coming season 🚦 Please join us in welcoming Lucas to the Greyhound Lane Stadium #WelcomeLucas #SRFC #UpTheGreyhounds #NeverStopNotGivingUp

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

This is unbelievable. We've just been sent photographic evidence of this DEATH THREAT against the Club on a German webpage. We have contacted Interpol and UEFA. The worst thing? This is Armistice day.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

8 months

@Naylorben Shut up we've got a crisis on our hands here

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

We are receiving an unbelievable amount of abuse from cybertrolls. I can't take much more. I feel dizzy and sick. Every time I look at my phone or laptop it's hundreds more vile replies or that horrible "crying with laughter" emojo. My men's mental health is all over the place.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

8 months

@Orwell_Fan If anything we've been too respectful here Simon

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

3 years

Well done @RoyalMail for managing to get this delivered to the Greyhound Lane stadium today! 👏👏👏👏👏 #SRFC #UpTheGreyhounds

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

5 years

THIS ACCOUNT HAS BEEN HACKED BY #ENYAFANS4COMMUNISM .... FOR A SECOND TIME!!! #SAILAWAYSAILAWAYSAILAWAYSAILAWAY JOIN US ON SATURDAY AS WE PROTEST THE CLUB'S APPALLING HUMAN RIGHTS RECORD. WE ESTIMATE 12 PEOPLE HAVE DIED OVER THE LAST 42 MONTHS AT GAMES INVOLVING STREATHAM ROVERS.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

7 months

ANNOUNCEMENT: We will hold a minute's silence in honour of Henry Kissinger before Saturday's match. We will be setting up an email address for fans to anonymously identify any supporters who refuse to take part with the dignity such a gesture demands. You have been warned.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

1 year

INJURY NEWS: The following players are listed as doubtful for today's game. Mason Anderson (men’s mental health) Troy Best (men’s mental health) Geoff Brown (men’s mental health) Lucas Dalton-Bandini (men’s mental health) Trevor Davies (men’s mental health)

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

5 years

The volunteers who run this account have long dreamed that our beloved club #SRFC would one glorious day go on an FA Cup run and maybe even appear on the BBC. Instead we get vile mockery on Have I Got News For You on prime time BBC1. Absolutely heartbreaking. Painful. Agonising.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

8 months

#TBT A recently unearthed photo of our old mascot George the Greyhound from 1935 on the pitch of our former home, The Lonesome Fields. To help motivate the players, the team selection committee decreed that George should only be fed on weeks when the first team had won a match.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

6 months

#ChristmasMemories In 1984 local amateur theatre group Encore Express entertained the crowds during half-time of the Boxing Day derby match between Streatham Rovers and Norbury United by staging a mock execution of an IRA terrorist. #SRFC #UpTheGreyhounds #NeverStopNotGivingUp

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

6 months

#ChristmasMemories The combined stresses of the packed festive fixture list and increasing inner-city unemployment cause Streatham's Mark Patterson to ill-advisedly attempt to kidnap a baby whilst celebrating a late equaliser away to Reigate Heath on 27th December 1981. #SRFC

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

4 years

This is a warning to other clubs: we had a man called Iain Makate offer to clean & sanitise our balls over lockdown and he's only gone a stuck a papier-mache face of Joseph Stalin on every single one of our regulation match balls. They won't come off. Any suggestion @MitreSports ?

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

UPDATE: As you may have noticed, our profile image is still a black & white version of the club emblem even though the Queen’s funeral has taken place. The truth is we've lost the original coloured image file. If anyone has a copy of it please get in touch ASAP. PLEASE RETWEET

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

4 months

📝 NEW SIGNING! ✍️ We are very happy to announce we have signed versatile midfielder Jack Ajum-Bojet for the rest of the season. Please give Jack a BIG "Streatham Welcome" with the hashtag #HiJackAjumBojet . #SRFC #UpTheGreyhounds

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

7 months

NEW: Diadem Property Development, a subsidiary of the Club's owners Apex Eclipse Capital, the European arm of private equity investor Velocity Invicta, have revealed this stunning visualisation of their plans for a New Greyhound Lane Stadium to replace our current ground. #SRFC

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

8 months

UPDATE: During his pitch inspection the referee found three survivors trapped in the rubble - something we had neglected to check owing to the fact we have never received disaster rescue training. Perhaps something the League Committee and/or @FA could look into providing.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

If anybody has any information regarding the whereabouts of Joseph Kony please contact seasontickets @streathamroversofficialwebpage .net immediately. Alternatively, you can contact the US State Department directly on +1-202-975-5468 or via email at wcrp @state .gov. #SRFC

Global Criminal Justice Rewards Program

@GCJRewards

2 years

REWARD. Do you have information?

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

5 years

The Club has become embroiled in completely false allegations that SRFC does not exist and is in fact an elaborate online prank. These damaging claims have clearly been cooked up by fans of rival Xtermin8 Rat Poison Football League teams (and possibly the Kremlin, and maybe MI6).

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

We've got a special twentieth anniversary to celebrate today!! 🎉🥳🪩🍾 #OnThisDay in 2002 Streatham Rovers Football Club lifted the ban on unmarried women attending matches at the Greyhound Lane Stadium. #SRFC #UpTheGreyhounds #WhatAClubWhatAnEthos

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

8 months

And before anyone starts moaning: We couldn't hear their calls for help because we were testing the new public address system this morning. Peckham Tony who used to work as a salesman for Tannoy says "Rhythm is a Dancer" is the best song to check a new system is working.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

1 year

We are delighted to announce that, in accordance with @FIFAcom President Gianni Infantino's wishes, the Club Committee have this evening approved the renaming of the Greyhound Lane Stadium, which will be known as the Greyhound Lane Pelédome from the start of the 2023/24 season.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

Just had to confiscate this off a child & their gormless parent on their way into the ground for tonight's game. We're a football club chasing promotion, not some two-bit charity dedicated to clothing needy children. Please, just don't do stunts like this. #SRFC #UpTheGreyhounds

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

Just occured to me I've failed to use the Club's official hashtags: #SRFC #UpTheGreyhounds #NeverStopNotGivingUp #WhatAClubWhatAnEthos #COYBIPAG #AubergineArmy #ThinkAboutGoals You can use these to find out all the latest info on your favourite Xtermin8 Rat Poison League team.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

6 years

URGENT REQUEST: the club is desperately looking for opposition for a "behind closed doors" training friendly TONIGHT after it emerged the team we were supposed to be playing "Wankford Rovers" do not in fact actually exist and are some kind of online prank.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

8 years

#OnThisDay in 1971 goalkeeper and club captain Chas Watson left Streatham Rovers to join the Baader-Meinhof Group.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

6 months

PITCH INSPECTION: There is a pitch inspection planned for 11:30am ahead of our match away at Reigate Heath's Frewiel Steel Community Stadium. We will update you as soon as we know the referee's final decision. #SRFC #UpTheGreyhounds #NeverStopNotGivingUp

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

1 year

The Streatham Rovers Club Committee would like to formally welcome Finland to @NATO . #SRFC #UpTheGreyhounds #NeverStopNotGivingUp

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

3 years

We will be releasing an official club statement regarding the attempted coup in the United States in due course. #SRFC

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

1 year

Our 2023/24 league fixtures have been released but we have put an emergency appeal in to the League Committee because the first letter of our first twelve opponents spell out something that is completely at odds with the views, values and ethos of Streatham Rovers Football Club.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

5 years

We've had the ongoing issue of the dog muck outside the clubhouse ignored by local MPs from three different political parties but within days of announcing his candidacy for London mayor Rory Stewart has shown he's not afraid to get his hands dirty. Absolutely first class 👏👏👏

Rory Stewart

@RoryStewartUK

5 years

@GreenJamieS @StreathamRovers Wow- can you email through?

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

5 years

We would like to take this opportunity to distance ourselves from Rory Stewart following these remarks. Rory held no official position with the club and was merely interested in our dog muck situation. Racism has no place in football or wider society.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

6 months

Roxeth Castle FC have left our away changing room in a DISGRACEFUL state following our Fortuna Industrial Lubricants Challenge Cup 5th Round victory at the Greyhound Lane stadium. In a presumably premeditated act they left behind what appears to be a papier-mache goose ON FIRE.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

I just wanted to extend the hand of friendship round the world

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

Streatham Rovers FC are delighted to announce that we will be adopting Decimal Time on a trial basis starting from tomorrow. First used in France in the 1790s, the move is the brainchild of manager @TaffGoose who believes it will help the club operate on a more rational basis.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

5 years

HALF-TIME: Sydenham United 2-0 Streatham Rovers. Poor first half for the Greyhounds. We just can't cope with the surging runs of Dane Francis from (yes you've guessed it....) the left back position. Another 45 to go, all to play for. #SRFC #UpTheGreyhounds #NeverStopNotGivingUp

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

7 years

Hi @ChukaUmunna can you confirm whether you're still on for the leadership campaign launch in the clubhouse you booked 6 weeks ago?

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

5 years

@juventusfcen @SerieA There's an idiot who goes to games in our league with a GoPro camera attached to his head, streaming matches directly to the world wide web. Next thing you know elderly fans prone to pneumonia are deciding to "stay in" and "watch it on the ipad". A whole generation of fans lost.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

We are awaiting official confirmation from the Xtermin8 Rat Poison Football League that this weekend's fixtures will be postponed. In the meantime, we would like to announce that out of respect for Her Majesty we will not be cleaning the toilets for the duration of September.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

5 years

Some football clubs like to put a small #RemembranceDay poppy on their club badge. Here at Streatham Rovers we have a touch more class than that. We have put a small #SRFC club badge on our large #RemembranceDay poppy. Retweet if you agree that we respect. #WeWillRememberThem

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

We will be holding a fun arts and crafts workshop for children aged 4-12 years in The Clubhouse between 11am and 1pm tomorrow afternoon. See attached image for further details. #SRFC #UpTheGreyhounds #NeverStopNotGivingUp #WhatAClubWhatAnEthos

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

5 years

#SRFC are delighted to announce that we have become the very first football club in England & Wales to #SignThePledge to allow our stadium to be used as a temporary internment camp in the event of a breakdown in law & order. As a community-focused club we're proud to do our part.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

5 months

#GreyhoundLaneMemories In September 1970 midfielder Mike Dylan was attacked by weasels. #SRFC #UpTheGreyhounds #NeverStopNotGivingUp #WhatAClubWhatAnEthos

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

To celebrate the life of Mikhail Gorbachev, a man who displayed a genuine #ATouchOfClass by demolishing the Berlin Wall and always exhibited a #NeverStopNotGivingUp attitude, we have commissioned this tribute where his trademark birthmark has been replaced with our club badge.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

3 years

Nice to see the club get a mention in the Evening Standard today, a newspaper that all too often only pays attention to the city's so-called "bigger clubs". #SRFC #UpTheGreyhounds #WhatAClubWhatAnEthos

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

6 months

#ChristmasMemories In a December 1974 Surrey & Sussex League fixture away at Croydonian a drunken Father Christmas - who was later revealed to have gambling debts totalling £8,000 - ran onto the pitch to slide tackle Streatham's Mel Daly in a desperate bid to stop him scoring.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

3 years

For the past two weeks we have kept a list of the online abuse we have received. This comes from Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, comments on local news articles, the SRFC Online Fan Forum and TripAdvisor. We post these without comment. They're scum. Abusive scum.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

7 months

This is how we used to deal with pitch invaders in the 1970s. #MondayMotivation #MondayMood #TurboMotivation #SRFC #UpTheGreyhounds #NeverStopNotGivingUp #WhatAClubWhatAnEthos

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

CLUB STATEMENT: We planned a rather elaborate #AprilFoolsDay prank for today but following a visit from the Met Police's Counter Terrorism Command branch and advice from players that it could be used by far-right extremists to stoke racial tensions we have decided to wait a year.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

4 years

As a non-league football club we're not usually in a position to offer medical advice but we have to say this is NOT a good idea. One of our players accidentally picked up a bottle of toilet bleach during a post-match interview & was sick for several days.

MSNBC

@MSNBC

4 years

President Trump suggests "injection" of disinfectant to beat coronavirus and "clean" the lungs at the White House daily briefing. A Dept. of Homeland Security official later said federal laboratories are not considering such a treatment option.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

3 years

Lots of football clubs are sending their congratulations to Emma Raducanu but we won't be doing that. Respect works two ways. Where were her kind words when we reached the quarter finals of the 2019/20 Fortuna Industrial Lubricants Challenge Cup?! (which we would likely have won)

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

4 months

Following rumours circulating on the Club Forum we would like to confirm that from next season we will be introducing a special price for under 30s that is double the normal admission cost in order to subsidise the continued half-price discount for senior citizens. #SRFC

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

3 years

This is why we have to end online abuse. This account is run by volunteers but this is just one example of the almost daily abuse we receive. Cyberthugs think they can get away with it, and until we have the threat of lengthy prison sentences they will just carry on doing it.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

10 months

Today, everyone at Streatham Rovers Football Club remembers the late Queen, Elizabeth II, who passed away a year ago today. On this sad anniversary we reflect on her enormous legacy and the incredible impact she made on the lives of her people.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

69' 💥 Massie Verpey-Kness shows enormous desire, gets into the box and agonisingly screws his shit wife. #SRFCvPYFC

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

8 months

UPDATE: Two of the three Club Volunteers have been pulled out from the wreckage and sent to hospital. The clear up operation can finally begin. We consider this matter now closed.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

1 year

We are heartbroken by Pele's passing. Truly, the greatest footballer of all time. I'm sure the Club will do something to mark his passing at Saturday's game, not that I'll be there because I'm banned from the stadium but let's not allow that to overshadow Pele's remarkable life.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

1 year

@HeshComps @LutonTown I'm not a miserable git. We're a miserable football club.

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4

416

Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

5 years

The "Collins, Underwood, Norman, Thomas and Stevens" one doesn't even make sense because they would need 12 players on the pitch. Just desperate to be rude and insulting. Well we have your photo now @Coopdog1979 so consider yourself BANNED FOR LIFE from the Greyhound Lane ground.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

Ahead of our final away game of the season centre forward Geoff Brown has a message for those of you planning to go to the Frimley branch of @TobyCarvery en route to the match. Remember who you represent. Stay safe and enjoy the carvery. #SRFC #WhatAClubWhatAnEthos

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

We are celebrating the #PlatinumJubilee by launching our new 2022/23 home kit, sponsored by Queen ElizaBET, with a special poem by @rogerparsnip . The shirt is available to buy NOW at And you can WIN one if you RETWEET + LIKE this tweet and FOLLOW us.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

4 years

This is a complete lie. Never happened.

15

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417

Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

5 months

#FlashbackFriday In March 1972, in the midst of a bout of what we would now sympathetically recognise as men's mental health, Streatham full-back Arthur "Art" Green pulled out a submachine gun and threatened to kill everybody during a league game away at Ifield & Maidenbower FC.

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

1 year

We are introducing a new disciplinary system to try to stem the tidal wave of abuse this Official Club Social Media Account receives on a daily basis. It's a yellow/red card system inspired by association football so there's absolutely no chance of not understanding it. #SRFC

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417

Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

1 year

Terry I know you thought he was a cunt but please post this with a photo: Everyone at Streatham Rovers Football Club is extremely saddened to hear of the death of long-serving Xtermin8 League chairman Michael Parson. A dedicated football man and a true gent. RIP. #SRFC etc.

22

39

416

Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

24 days

To celebrate #Pride we have temporarily changed our Club Badge to include #RainbowRusty , a homosexual mechanical rabbit being chased down by our traditional racing greyhound mascot. #SRFC #SRFCPride #UpTheGreyhounds #NeverStopNotGivingUp #TurboMotivation #WhatAClubWhatAnEthos

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Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

5 months

#ThrowbackThursday Max Gallagher was a very promising young forward who made his Streatham debut in 1974. Sadly, inspired by the film Pumping Iron, he began bodybuilding and by the 1979/80 season had ballooned to such horrific proportions he was virtually immobile. #SRFC

21

31

420

Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

2 years

ANNOUNCEMENT: We have decided to postpone tonight's under 18s match against Caversham Sports Academy as a mark of respect following the shocking events at last night's #Oscars ceremony. #Oscars2022 #Oscar #SRFC #UpTheGreyhounds #WhatAClubWhatAnEthos

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405

Streatham Rovers Football Club

@StreathamRovers

4 years

@VinnieJones65 I honestly think a lot of people nowadays would benefit from crawling out of rat-infested man-made mazes of swamps to be machine gunned into mincemeat over the yuletide period (with a quick break for a heartwarming football match). I didn't fight in the war but feel like I did.

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