Male Thoughts @SteveStfler Twitter profile

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

1 year

Guess who's back on Twitter?!😃

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

10 years

Bae: come over Me: i'm watchin the lion king Bae: i'm horny Me: mufasa just died Bae: my parents aren't home Me: fucking mufasa just died

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@SteveStfler

10 years

Your girlfriend is gonna consider killing you a few times a week. That's how you know it's real love.

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@SteveStfler

10 years

don’t start an argument with a girl because they all have 45030194 GB memories and will bring up something you did at 14:27PM on 23/04/2008

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@SteveStfler

11 years

turned my goldfish into a dolphin http://t.co/u5nEgln3Sx

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@SteveStfler

10 years

I have no problem texting you first as long as you make me feel like you actually wanna talk. Cut that dry shit out.

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@SteveStfler

10 years

IF YOU REFUSE TO TEXT PEOPLE FIRST THEN YOU BELONG IN THE NEAREST ELEMENTARY SCHOOL SINCE YOU WANNA BE CHILDISH

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@SteveStfler

10 years

peeing in the ocean is the best feeling its like im sharing a piece of myself with the world i hope my pee made it to spain, i love spain

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@SteveStfler

10 years

I love the Kardashians because they literally do nothing and that's why they are famous and it's so inspiring honestly

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

10 years

I hate when girls say "don't worry, he's just a friend." I remember when i was a friend and wanted to fuck the shit outta you.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

What if in like 30 years they made a film about Leonardo DiCraprio and how he never won an Oscar...and the actor who played him got an Oscar

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

10 years

Priest: Kim, do you take Kanye to be your lawfully wedded husband to love and cherish? Kim: I.. *Kanye grabs mic* Kanye: She do

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

10 years

Can't trust a bitch who lets the microwave hit 0, she doesn't care about her life...she probably jumps on the lava part of the floor too.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

10 years

Note to self: When you're talking to a female always remember that you're also talking to her friends via screenshots.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

10 years

I was gonna take over the world this morning but I overslept. Postponed. Again.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

10 years

The only way Marijuana can kill you is if you get murdered by a serial killer whose name is Marijuana

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

A fat girl at my school said she was pregnant and everybody let her go first in the lunch line everyday. That bitch was pregnant for 3 years

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

In 1814 Women had no rights. In 1914 Women fought for some rights. In 2014 Women are always fucking right.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

GF: come see me babe? ME: I'm at a Beyoncé and Jay-Z concert I can't Gf: I'm off my period Me: http://t.co/DeglJ5Zrt3

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

10 years

I don't pretend to be something I'm not. I know I'm an asshole, and I own that shit like a motherfucker.

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@SteveStfler

10 years

A woman saying “I’m not mad at you” is like a dentist saying “You won’t feel a thing.”

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

10 years

My neighbor obviously doesn't watch porn. She asked me to come fix her sink, I been here for an hour and i'm still fixing the damn sink.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

10 years

There's a huge difference between treating your girl right and just being whipped.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

10 years

I’ve realized arguing with girls is pointless. Real logic makes no sense to them and the power of the vagina is overwhelming.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

I think the guy who invented ties was trying to commit suicide then he saw himself in the mirror & thought... "Wait, this looks nice."..

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

Text a girl something stupid and it takes 42 seconds for three of her friends to get the screenshot

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

10 years

There's two sides to each girl: The one you meet when's she's in public and the one when she's alone. Don't date her until you've seen both.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

10 years

I don't play that "He's my best guy friend" bullshit. They're always the first guy girls turn to when shit goes wrong.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

Dudes be like, "I only talk to one girl." AND THAT STATUS BE HAVING 15 BITCHES FEELING SPECIAL.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

Gave this girl my number last week, she said she'll call me when she gets home. I'm starting to think she's homeless

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

The nicest people I've met are covered in tattoos & piercings & the most judgmental people I've met are the ones who go to church on Sundays

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

10 years

Calling your Girlfriend beautiful cause your cock isn't gonna suck it's self.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

10 years

Don't wear leggings and expect me not to look at your ass.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

Whenever you're feeling down just remember that you've won as many Oscars as Leonardo Dicaprio

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

10 years

My girlfriend asked me if I had a secret pet name for her. Judging by the look on her face, 'sperm whale' was not an appropriate answer.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

10 years

Me: Oh wow, how much is the rent for this amazing apartment? "Sir, this is the beer aisle of the grocery store."

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

10 years

NEVER underestimate a woman's ability to make you feel guilty for her mistake.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

Justin Bieber: *kills someone* Fans: Stop judging him he's only 19 he's allowed to make some mistakes!

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

10 years

I didn't scream out someone else's name during sex.. I was just thinking of baby names in case you get pregnant.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

A girl tweeted "You might be ghetto if u bring food from outside into the movies" No u might be stupid if u pay 4.99 for a bag of skittles

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

10 years

You can always tell if a guy masturbates a lot by looking at his hands. If you look closely, you'll see a wedding ring.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

How to get out of the friendzone: 1. Pull out your dick 2. Tell her "you gonna learn today"

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

Am I the only one annoyed by all these twitter accounts about love and relationships making it look like guys are the biggest assholes?

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

After you nut in her mouth http://t.co/O4L1F0AFcm

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@SteveStfler

11 years

cute things to call your girlfriend: 1. sugar 2. honey 3. flour 4. egg 5. 1/2lb butter 6. stir 7. pour into pan 8. preheat to 375°

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

9 years

I just apologized to my wife for something she did wrong. Marriage is fun.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

1 year

Girls once a month be like

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

Girl walks in with half her tits showing, I look. I'm the pervert. So I walk in with half my cock showing. Girl looks & I'm still the perv!

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

RIP to that Pussy. http://t.co/f8rpJDhirM

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@SteveStfler

11 years

I just got my girlfriend a 'get better soon' card. she isn't sick, I just think she can get better.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

You got 3 minutes to text me or I'm climbing thru your window & texting myself back.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

Girl : I'm horny, come over. Me : http://t.co/6A4RxqLv6A

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

Hakuna Ma'Vodka It means no memories for the rest of your night

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@SteveStfler

11 years

I'm the BEST!! 😂😂😁 http://t.co/iWxLdC4VHu

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

walk into the club like 'What up? I got a big cock!' http://t.co/WdBIO8Pwu2

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

9 years

All men do is play video games and be faithful.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

Some cunt in a nightclub came up to me and said, "I get 20 times more girls than you do, haha." Me: 20 x 0 = 0.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

What do you call a sleeping pizza? A piZzza! ha ha haha ... someone date me please.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

9 years

If you tell me you're choosing between me and another guy, i'll make it easier. And leave your ass.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

If a girl ever pulls a knife on you during an argument, pull out bread, ham, & mayo. Instincts will kick in & she'll make you a sandwich

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

*puts selfie on top of Christmas tree because i am the star*

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@SteveStfler

11 years

Dear Justin Bieber Haters .. http://t.co/e5ga7oyMS7

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

7 months

If we're not this locked in, I don’t want it

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

I may seem like an asshole but deep down I’m a good person and even deeper down I’m a bigger asshole

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@SteveStfler

11 years

I would like to thank my arms, for always being by side. My legs, for always supporting me, & my fingers…because I can always count on them

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

5 months

mood

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

Pregnant women look so happy. I wonder if they know that their vagina is going to be ripped open by a little fucker.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

http://t.co/YZHXLZGLPL

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@SteveStfler

9 years

Girls will take two and a half hours to get ready but if you don't have shoes on when they're done, you're the problem

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

Glue a tiny mirror over your drivers license photo so when you hand it to the police they will get confused and arrest themselves instead.

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@SteveStfler

11 years

My girlfriend broke up with me because I make too many Linkin Park references, but in the end it doesn't even matter.

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@SteveStfler

11 years

Gayest Tweet EVER!!😂😂 http://t.co/RY4jgc5f1b

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@SteveStfler

11 years

Kim, Kourtney and Khloe.The only KKK that will let black guys inside them.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

4 months

Bro's a genius

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

If you make noise during sex & your girlfriend is quiet....You're the one getting fucked 😭😂

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@SteveStfler

11 years

Scientifically proven that girls who give head every night will become prettier and skinnier as they age. RT to spread the word!

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

Dear sluts, This might come as a surprise to you, but your boobs go inside your shirt. Just kidding, show me your titties.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

4 months

Me: She's deadass crazy bro. I'm done with her Her: come over Me:

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@SteveStfler

1 year

lmaooo😂

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

Fat bitches will dance all night at the club, but won't run for 10 minutes on a treadmill.

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@SteveStfler

11 years

A hoes favorite line is, 'Don't judge me, you don't know what I been thru'.....Yeah I do, a lot of dick.

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@SteveStfler

11 years

Instead of calling girls thirsty, we should call them D Hydrated

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@SteveStfler

11 years

Lil Wayne Rap Be like: Spilled hot tea on my leg, call that T-Pain.

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

How to get out the friendzone: "So we are gonna fuck or do you wanna lose your best friend?"

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@SteveStfler

11 years

I'm bad at sexting. Gf: I'm wet. Me: You need a paper towel? Gf: More than that babe... Me: 2 paper towels?

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Male Thoughts

@SteveStfler

11 years

Those who make fun of Lorde and her boyfriend are the same people that cry on twitter 24/7 because they're single.

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@SteveStfler

4 months

Me googling all the pills I found in her bathroom after I hit raw

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