Atticus @NotAtticusSmith Twitter profile

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

3 months

Chick I’m on a date with just ordered an angel shot, hell yeah let’s get drunk!

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

5 months

Thanks AT&T, because of your shitty network I was late for work because my mom wasn’t able to call me and wake me up (25 yo male)

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

3 months

Salute the flag when you walk in

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

Commenting “hit it first” on my one night stand’s wedding post

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

3 months

She sent a picture of her horse, back to the drawing board

Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

3 months

Met a cool chick, time to delete

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

Goaltending

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

1 month

Watching CNN not because I’m a stupid lib, rather because I’m stupid horny

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

And to think I probably drove home this night

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

1 month

“This is the most important election of your life” Oh I’m sorry, is one of them going to legalize cocaine?

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

5 months

@slothy_420 She’s not allowed to do that anymore after the Fortnite porn incident

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

6 months

Breakfast

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

5 months

Driving home from the bar

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

Just saw a black man crying at the doctor with a heavy set white woman, one can only assume she just got prescribed ozempic

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

5 months

The far left can’t fathom that this is all I need to survive

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

Did I stutter

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

W

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

Saying zyn’s last one hour is like saying I last 5 minutes in bed

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

Bad day to be my digestive system

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

Next question

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

@CasualburnerAfc A very pretty lady who probably bear witness to the greatest beer burp of all time

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

@murrayhillmike No beer unit shaming

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

1 month

@Youhappentohear Would I get blocked if I posted shaft (circumcised) and balls?

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

1 month

Yes, two gargantuans please

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

6 months

Peed white in my sleep again

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

2 months

My digital footprint will haunt me forever

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

5 months

@RLHoitzII The 6 year old working the cash register when you come in yelling demanding answers

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

@blueyedcole 3/4 is good but 4/4 would’ve been great

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

15 days

@NicholasSwag69 If you don’t want bottom one lmk I can make a trade

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

3 months

Who let my 14 year old brother cook this hard

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

6 months

Doing a little bit of research

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

3 months

@sacks70214 She’s got birthing shoulders

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

3 months

Met a cool chick, time to delete

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

3 months

Try kneeling for this and see what happens, pal

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

@KanesCabDriv3r 1984

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

6 months

“License and registration please” Me:

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

Yeah that’s an automatic purchase for my crib

The Redheaded libertarian

@TRHLofficial

4 months

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

5 months

One of those chill in your car and eat half a dozen deviled eggs kinda night

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime, so I watch the Master’s on company time

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

6 months

Well my ex canceled the Spotify premium I was using which unfortunately means I am revoking her Dads access to my Disney +. Good guy. Hate to see him caught in the crossfire

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

6 months

I tried out pizza’ing the hut

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

3 months

If you can balance a beer on a urinal you can pass a field sobriety test

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

Good morning

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

3 months

I need every picture of Sydney Sweeney please

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

When I get drafted for WW3

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

@local_hooperr Only OG’s

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

You clearly don’t know me

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

Back to the drawing board😈

Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

STD results coming in today, Doctor has the chance to play the funniest April fools joke of all time

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

3 months

Going to reach for my wallet really fast to save him some time

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

6 months

Friendly neighborhood Mr. Patel

Ｗ 𝗜 𝗦 𝗘 𝗖 𝗢 𝗡 𝗡 𝗘 𝗖 𝗧 𝗢 𝗥 ™ 💬

@wiseconnector

6 months

What would you do with this space?

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

5 months

Lunch

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

Unemployed friend at 2:30PM on a Monday

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

5 months

Always that one roommate

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

3 months

Incredible Hinge Juggernaut

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

3 months

Sexting in the Uber isn’t illegal but it is frowned upon, like masturbating on an airplane

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

15 days

@NicholasSwag69 I can offer a 1st but they have locker room problems (baggage) or two 2nd’s that have both been but they’re a little older and could be worn out (ran through)

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

3 months

“Do you want my number or my snap?” Well, do you plan on sending nudes over text?

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

12 days

Real snap I just sent

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

1 month

Add this to your bag (had sex last night)

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

5 months

Sending this to my boy’s in Canada so they can use it as a hockey puck

Lincoln Riley

@LincolnRiley

3 years

Happy Easter‼️ 👨‍🍳

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

5 months

#NewProfilePic

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

6 months

Tits guy in an ass world

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

5 months

With the looming fear of these cyber attacks, I may have to change my password from “Password1” to “Password123”

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

14 days

Just made a sex joke to my sexy coworker and now I’m filling out a sheet that says “HR” which I can can only assume stands for “horny retard”

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

3 months

My b

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

Setting my homies up with my cousin so that we can finally be Eskimo bros

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

3 months

Breaking the ice with a chick from tinder after getting the snap by immediately sending a nut vid with sound

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

3 months

Oh you liked my Instagram story? That’s a body

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

1 month

Tried to take another piss vid to make it go viral again but it’s just me screaming in agony because it burns so bad

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

22 days

@bellesreelsbae Respectfully, the international space station can probably see you

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

@DUDEwipes get here

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

17 days

Ignoring all texts like this because of new NCAA football #NCAA25

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

6 months

@OTD2point0 I bet he saluted that first anthem

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

1 month

Honestly just reactivated because I needed to access all of the porn I had in my bookmarks so I could screenrecord it

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

Gym crushes come and go, but the thrill of following each one to their car will always stay the same

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

5 months

The coolest thing I ever did was eat 13 $1 hot dogs in one sitting

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

5 months

How do you make a girl organism

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

Just watched a family of 4 drive over this and crash and die

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

5 months

The only thing that would cure this hangover

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

11 days

Getting pretty full, all proceeds go to end of year kegger

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

Chat is this a good response?

Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

Instagram rizz masterclass

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

6 months

So many local hot single milf’s in my area that want to have sex with me

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

3 months

I’m a serial Instagram story liker

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

Alternating between spearmint and wintergreen zyns like a bisexual trying to decide if they like penis or vagina

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

5 months

Yeah I sometimes sit when I pee who hasn’t

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

@yellohatman People don’t slobber like they used to

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

5 months

Yo can someone bring me some toilet paper

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

3 months

Cause im tryna get in those draws

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

16 days

Searching “hinge” on my phone to show my date I don’t have the app anymore and 47 contacts with “hinge” in their contact name pop up

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

1 month

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

5 months

Who’s gonna carry the boats

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

6 months

Just cried watching Dune, not because of the plot but because it reminded me of her

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

About to take a massive they/them dump

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

4 months

If you ever feel the want to self inflict depression and/or suicidal tendencies, just go get your haircut at Sports Clips

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Atticus

@NotAtticusSmith

6 months

She said are you rich rich

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