One thing I'm changing in 2024 is not saving things 'for best.' I've had this candle for two years. Why? It's supposed to be lit and smelled. Best is every day.
At the midwife today my newborn needed his happy changing. My husband did the honours to which the midwife said 'well done Dad for having a go.' This outdated rhetoric drives me insane. He's taking 6 months off work (self employed) once I've gone back to work.
#equal
My hairdresser came around this evening. Saw my husband playing with the baby and cooking the other one dinner. She's 10 years younger than me and said 'aren't you lucky your husband is so good with the kids.' This rhetoric never ceases to irk me.
#HisKidsToo
It's 2022 and women's rights and their voices are being slowly but surely eroded. Evidenced by the fact that this week alone I've come across 6 different cases of maternity related discrimination. I've been doing this job for 13 years and I've never seen it so bad. Why?
1. In the tube young men were calling out to women up & down the escalator. I said why do you need to do that, it's low level sexual harassment, what gives you the right to heckle women? I was met with a tirade of abuse about how I should shut up and they were well brought up.
As a trainee solicitor I was very aware of work boundaries & not over sharing. The aim was to be professional. I aim to approach my practice with humanity & empathy but save personal things for my personal life. The idea of bringing your 'whole self' to work is too much.
A friend who practises in litigation told me that when she and other female colleagues/friends attend an interview they remove their wedding rings and refer to their husband as their partner to avoid the 'she might have a baby soon' stigma. Diabolical in 2022.
Trying to create better work boundaries
Client emails at 18.10 'can you talk?'
Me: 'sorry with the kids'
Client; 'ok, does 8pm work'
Me: 'tomorrow 9am suits..'
It was an absolute pleasure to represent
@ShahrarAli
in this landmark case.
@JJBarrister7BR
was formidable and it was a privilege to work with him.
Dr Shahrar Ali v GPEW | Didlaw
Sitting next to someone on the train who clearly works in a senior role in finance. I now know a lot about a potential big bank merger which I'm sure is not public knowledge.
The physical and mental impact on women after having a baby is not discussed enough. It's not just sleep deprivation but it's also body image, sense of self, fear of getting it wrong and FOMO.
2. Was I wrong to say something, was I wrong to tell them their actions may make women uncomfortable. They seemed to have no idea that their behaviour was inappropriate. I felt old and angry.
Why is it mainly women that get called 'hard faced' and what does it even mean? I'm often told I look 'hard faced' or I'm 'feisty.' Strong women are still a problem it seems.
I try to keep my 'tweets/X's' light & neutral but as a woman and a mother I have to comment on a) the inference that support for sex based rights is support for a 'row back' in women's rights and b) that children as young as 3 can question their gender. Simply wrong.
@ICMPLondon
I cannot understand why signage like this was considered appropriate to put up in the first place. Anything that sets one group of people against another and encourages denunciation should have had red flags all over it.
I am increasingly being instructed by women being made redundant on maternity leave or after telling their employer they are pregnant. It is woeful in 2024 that women having babies remain vulnerable and prevented from being both mothers and having a career.
Emily is 39 today! Growing up she taught me that being different was something to be celebrated. I am fiercely protective of her and it is because of her that I wanted to champion the rights of others who could not advocate for themselves.
One of my first experiences of motherhood was, after an emergency c section and losing 2 litres of blood to a uterine tear a midwife berating me for missing a feed. I just couldn't get the baby to latch. This trauma and female experience should never be diminished.
Seeing lots of legal colleagues suffering from overwork and burn out given the impact of lockdown/homeschooling/wfh/excessive workloads. This is when we should take the time as a profession to be kind and collaborative. We're all human.
This morning chatting to someone in a coffee shop I was told how lucky I was to have a supportive husband that helped with the kids. Really? They are his kids too...
Heard a lady yesterday say she couldn't have a pink handbag because she's a lawyer. Why the perception that the law is dull? Wear the bag. Life's too short
#Colour
#LawIsNotDull
#BeDifferent
For 6 months I've been telling myself to lose the baby weight, be more productive when the baby is sleeping. I'm finally realising I've done well just to get through the last 6 months in one piece with my sanity intact (just).
I just emailed myself to remind me to do something in the morning. I then checked my phone and thought who is emailing at this time. Its been a long day.
So I received an email from the other side who told me my interpretation of the law was wrong. I instantly thought that may be the case. Two hours of research later I proved I was right. Irritated that I doubted myself.
#HaveFaith
A big thanks to
@tribunaltweets
who provide such a fantastic service, live tweeting ET claims and facilitating access to hearings the public may otherwise miss.
Apparently women should get back in their boxes as their rights have gone too far. 'More than half of all men held this opinion' and the survey also found 'that people in Britain are increasingly afraid of promoting women’s rights for fear of reprisals.'
Social worker Rachel Meade has been awarded £40,000 for injury to feelings against
@SocialWorkEng
and
@CityWestminster
, aggravated damages against both, and exemplary damages against SWE.
What an amazing start to the week - being named in the
@TheLawyermag
Hot 100 2023 is just incredible and I am blown away. Grateful to
@didlawUK
@didlawkaren
for the opportunity to do such amazing work in a field I am passionate about
#ukemplaw
I've spoken to various women over the last couple of days who have reasonably and professionally articulated their protected beliefs and been subjected to draconian and unwarranted sanctions. What are these employers so afraid of and where are they getting their legal advice?
Taking my kids away soon with Emily, my sister who is learning disabled & non-verbal to celebrate her 40th. My 9yo said, 'Mummy, we have to make sure we find somewhere that serves noodles and rainbow cake, they're her favourites. We have to make it special.' That's inclusion.
If anyone is in the Luton area The Association of Ukranians in GB is in desperate need of the following: Sleeping bags, pillows, warm clothes, scarves, medical supplies, toiletries, dried food. Address is 16 Cromwell Hill, Luton, LU2 7PY and donations can be dropped from 10am. 🇺🇦
I gave a snippet of free advice this week for which the prospective client said he was so grateful he'd make a donation to charity of my choosing. I suggested a women's rights charity. Thought nothing more of it. I got an email yesterday confirming a £75 donation was made.
I joined
@didlawUK
15 months ago fresh from mat leave & having moved firms twice in as many years. I was fearful I'd disappeared into oblivion having had a baby & was full of self-doubt. Fast forward and I've found my fit, a firm that reflects my values and does work I'm proud of
One thing I never anticipated when I became an employment lawyer was extreme exposure to the mental health of others. The LPC doesn't teach about capacity/ welfare checks. This role is complex, a hybrid between adviser & counsellor. It can be draining. Make sure you have support.
Today is my last day
@BindmansLLP
. I have been fortunate to work with the phenomenal
@BindEmp
team and will miss them dearly. Looking forward to some down time over half term.
#AllChange
I seriously do not understand why pregnant women are still being subjected to the trauma of facing anxiety inducing scans/appts/procedures alone. It's barbaric and wholly out of keeping with the lifting of other restrictions.
I saw this and it really resonated. I have enjoyed wfh with some of the balance it has brought to my family life but I do find myself working longer hours with less human interaction. I think my working future is a hybrid model of office and home working.
#ThoughtForTheDay
Do not send me an email at 22.22 asking for my comments on the bundle and then produce the bundle anyway before 8am the following day. I am not amused.
It's been a rough week but successfully resolving a case involving serious sexual assault has made it better.
@didlawUK
acted pro bono and the relief and gratitude from the client has been overwhelming. She can now move on and rebuild her life.
Got a message today from someone I haven't spoken to in at least three years. 'Hi Liz, how are you and your lovely family? Can I pick your brains on employment law advice.' Followed by a reem of questions. Cheeky or just using your network?
Another day another response from a big law that starts 'Dear Sirs.' I am a female partner, in a firm with only female partners. 'Dear Madam' or 'Dear Mesdames' or 'Dear Didlaw' is the correct salutation.
#BrokenRecord
I don't condone dishonest or improper conduct but there is a running theme to the recent spate of sanctions against junior solicitors/paralegals. Fear and excessive workloads. Juniors are the future seniors, they need to be looked after
#mentalhealth
My husband is currently full-time carer for my 8 month old (and taxi for my 7 year old) as it makes financial sense for us. It really saddens me that he feels really out of place at baby and toddler groups and all local baby drop ins are advertised as 'Mum' groups.
My two year old is in 'early years' and can just about say his name and that of his sibling. He's potty training and learning basic life skills. He has absolutely no need for this kind of 'education' yet. Let the kids be.
I'm an employment lawyer because corporate was not my bag (I'll take a Mulberry). I didn't realise then how passionate I'd become about protecting people from discrimination & how lucky I would be to advocate for them, to try & make things better & effect change (however small).
It's the time of year that Auntie Emily comes go stay. She is non-verbal and needs lots of support. It always warms my heart how my 8 year old treats her with the utmost respect. They adore each other.
@MrsNickyClark
My 38 year old sister with the learning age of 3 or 4 year old does not qualify for a blue badge because she is mobile. Irrespective of the fact that she has fine motor skill issues, spatial awareness issues and needs constant support. The test is simply wrong.
Someone asked me today why I chose to have an 8 yr age gap between my kids. An emergency c section, three years for my uterus and womb to recover, two miscarriages and unexpectedly pregnant at nearly 41. Nothing to do with choice. I've been lucky.
One benefit of getting older is having less f**** to give. I spent my teens to 30s crippled with worry about what people thought of me. Post 40 I realise I'm not everyone's cup of 🫖 but that's OK. You can't please everyone.
I receive an aggressive letter after hrs on a Tues with a deadline to respond within 3 working days. I state I will respond within 7 & get the authors' OOO. Another letter lands on Mon, after hours, saying my extension request is rejected. Who says? I'll respond when I'm ready.
Whilst watching my twitter feed blow up thanks to a successful case I managed to spend some time with these two. Work/life balance isn't easy and sometimes it's hard to believe you're doing either very well.
When your father in law says 'Liz you're a solicitor how do you make an IHT declaration and how much is it for advice on grant of probate.' Um...my private client knowledge extends to 10 multiple choice questions on the LPC. Know your lane.
My husband put his business on hold two years ago to look after our second child. He's now going back to work. Someone asked him the other day how it had felt to be financially dependent on his wife. His response, 'it works, that's the partnership.'