I remember this tweet. I was very grumpy that day. Someone had really pissed me off. I saw this tweet which was so very simple and correct. Heartfelt too. He always was. I’ve genuinely thought about it a few times since when I’ve been in a bad mood. I will continue to do so.
May I remind you all that Bono once wrote to Captain Beefheart saying he was interested in doing a collaboration with him. Captain B wrote back by hand: “Dear Bongo, No”
After Muppet Christmas Carol and Muppet Treasure Island, what story or film would you like to see re-done as a muppet version.
I’m thinking Muppet Evil Dead or Muppet Alien
“We MUST deliver Brexit - otherwise some bald men in yellow vests who cried about a vegan sausage roll might march in London and shout a bit - we must avoid that!!!”
But what about re-igniting The Troubles?
“Stop overreacting!”
So the
#bbcpresenter
timeline is now confirmed as:
Parents went to police in April with “evidence”. Police said no crime.
Parents complained to BBC in May. BBC emailed them and called them to get further info and they didn’t respond.
Parents went to the Sun in early July….
It is common court vernacular when more than one trial is listed for the court clerk to refer to the defence lawyer per the alleged offence.
e.g. “Are you the Assault or the Fraud?”
Greeted this morning with “Are you the public masturbator?”
Why is Katy Perry performing at the Coronation celebrations? Because she’s perfectly representative of Britain. She was briefly quite enamoured with Russell Brand and then realised he was a terrible arsehole.
Reminder: Judges tend to throw out defamation cases if the person who claims their character was besmirched by a comment seen/heard by a few people - actually chose to repost that comment so that thousands more people could see it.
@AidanCTweets
I've seen so many examples of GCs mocking women (who turn out to be CIS) for being 'obviously trans". What a win for the patriarchy that women aren't fighting misogyny because they're too busy attacking cis women for not being girly enough to fit male defined norms of femininity
BBC has met with police who still take the view no crime has been committed and the alleged victim has issued a statement confirming nothing illegal or untoward happened.
The Sun confirm they paid the parents for the “story”.
A fine distraction from Boris failing to disclose.
Royal Blood reacting with all the rock n’ roll rebellion vibes of a prissy middle aged couple whose breakfast has been given less than full marks on Four In A Bed.
BEFORE The Sun published the story about the young person, that young person contacted The Sun to say their parents’ claims were untrue. Journalistic rules require the publisher to publish right to reply but The Sun chose not to publish the account of the alleged victim.
@spruce_lii
@Phil_Lewis_
Well if he wants us to treat guns like planes…fine - you need 300 hours of supervised training before you can operate one and they each cost $40,000,000 so most individuals cannot afford to own one.
The Flight of the Conchords original BBC radio series being repeated on
@BBCRadio4Extra
. Available to stream or download on the iPlayer radio app.
@AJemaineClement
Dear
@BBCSport
@BBC
In 2016 some people criticised
@GaryLineker
’s tweets supporting refugees’ rights and wrongly said he had breached impartiality rules for BBC *employees*
You issued this statement:
“Gary is a freelance broadcaster and this is a personal Twitter account”
It disappoints me enormously how most people forget that the proper trial (no easily swayed jury - just an experienced judge) in England heard weeks of evidence and concluded very firmly that Depp abused Heard. She is a victim.
Thank fuck for that. My wife and her colleague were hoping to stop relying on charities and stuff they’ve bought themselves on Amazon to give them sufficient PPE to reduce their risk of dying on the job - but this is even better.
.
@MattHancock
My wife and other colleagues working on the NHS frontlines are wearing shower caps they bought from Asda and rubber gloves from home hair dye kits because they can’t get any at work. Don’t you fucking dare suggest they are being wasteful with PPE
@kattenbarge
@sliderulesyou
I’m a defence lawyer. I’m so sick of representing 12-16 year old lads at police stations and I’m having to explain the absolute basics of consent and harassment and sexual assault to them because nobody has had that conversation with them.
Please stop pretending Linehan’s gig being pulled is about “his views on gender”. It’s about his serial bullying and abuse and doxxing of women (cis+trans) to the point where he was banned from the platform and TWICE being warned by the police he has committed criminal harassment
Why is it that the phrase “it’s only a few bad apples” seems to be used almost exclusively by people who don’t understand the phrase?
They are cutting off the end off this old adage: “that turn the whole barrel rotten”.
Folks: I’m going to make a pledge. Please join me in this pledge and RT if you agree:
If a band has to cancel a gig I have tickets for due to the virus, I will spend the refunded money on buying music or merch from their official online store/Bandcamp etc so they can keep going.
Cars like this just should not be allowed on the roads. There is absolutely no need for a vehicle like the current Land Rover Defender to exist. The shape/smeans they are way more likely to kill a pedestrian if they hit them rather than injure them.
Dear America: have you ever thought about paying restaurant staff a living wage so that tips aren’t deemed essential and foreigners don’t get treated like shit for not knowing?
I'm a grumpy middle aged man that loved the Time Bandits movie and hates remakes and reboots in general.
I also love the works of
@AJemaineClement
and
@TaikaWaititi
so felt I really should give the Apple TV series Time Bandits a chance.
Amazing. Just wonderful. 10/10.
If Andy Burnham had appeared on telly every single fucking night telling the entire fucking nation not to break the fucking speed limit then I would give a shit about his speeding fine but he didn’t so I don’t.
When it’s one of my clients nicked for a bit of low level weed dealing - even if they don’t have the original phone and just the number they can do a Cycoms check via the ISP and mobile network and retrieve all messages sent and received. They can do it here if they want to.
BREAKING: Government says it might not be able to retrieve Whatsapp and text messages relating to lucrative contracts because Lord Bethell "replaced" his phone. SHARE if you think it's high time politicians used proper channels for Government business ✊
Bicester isn’t in ‘the Midlands’ - it’s in Oxfordshire, which is technically the South East.
Bicester is a town - it isn’t a city.
Worcester’s local paper is the Worcester News not the Worcester Times.
I have had all of these facts pointed out in replies to this dumb joke.
Not even in the top 5 stories. Not trending. Can you imagine if 5 Muslims got nicked for terrorism offences and they had to send in the bomb squad due to what they had found at the scene?
@ashleyfeinberg
@MikeDrucker
CBS reporter David Pogue reported that a waiver described the submersible as an "experimental" vessel, "that has not been approved or certified by any regulatory body, and could result in physical injury, disability, emotional trauma or death".
Hi there
@DavidLammy
I’m a criminal lawyer. It’s my job to keep up to date with the constant flood of new legislation.
I’d be happy to use 5 minutes of my own time (for free) to set out the 4 key laws the Tories have introduced that remove fundamental human rights.
Lammy stating clearly that Labour will not repeal the anti-protest legislation if it gets into government
'We can't come into office picking through all the Conservative legislation and repealing it. It would take too much time.'
STOP
RETWEETING
PIERS
MORGAN
AND
POINTING
OUT
WHAT
A
TIT
HE
IS
WE
KNOW
YOU
ARE
JUST
SHARING
HIS
BULLSHIT
TWITTER
ALGORITHMS
SEE
THIS
AND
IT
HELPS
HIS
PROFILE
YOU
TWATS
Just had an argument with a really rude woman on the bus. I remained calm but was very cutting and I certainly had the last laugh even though this happened two weeks ago and at the time I said nothing and I’m only having the argument in my head.
It was never really an issue in the days before social media but the law hasn't changed. You can't claim your reputation was damaged to the point where you should be compensated for it if you are the person who broadcast it.
@amockingbird
@sliderulesyou
@kaybriell
@sarahhollowell
I am also becoming more convinced that having anxiety isn’t a thing. It’s our natural state. It’s those fuckers who aren’t constantly anxious that aren’t right and need diagnosing with some kind of chilled out syndrome.
And this is the problem - the intellectual level we have reached in this country is a large number of people will actively protest against a piece of cloth on their face instead of the most draconian policing bill in history. Absolute morons.
.
@RMTunion
Train cancelled. Coach full. Had to drive to central London from Midlands. Was hell and cost a fortune in fuel and can’t have a drink now because I have to drive home. I still support all your members and the strike. Minor inconvenience to me, but they need fair pay!
She was being entirely serious and not aiming for an innuendo. I of course replied “I know I’ve earned a few nicknames in this building over the years...”
In my 20+ years of dealing with criminal cases I have come across several cases where a woman was murdered and the neighbours heard everything and even though they thought it was a violent row they didn’t call the police because they “didn’t want to get involved”.
GET INVOLVED.
What truly marks out the anti-lockdown anti-mask brigade as truly thick is their seemingly unwavering belief that the rest of us like wearing masks and not having a social life and not seeing our family.
We hate it too. We’re just not snowflakes who sulk about it.
As a lawyer who gets tired of things being simplified into tweets (and I simplified something into a tweet) I have to say that I said "tend to" for a reason. It's not absolute and it's a little more nuanced BUT it should weigh heavily in Mukhtar's favour. Hope the Judge bins it.
Going to have to mute a hell of a lot of people whining about being bored. Me and wife still working full time because we are “key workers”. Worried about how soon we will get sick and then have to let our patients/clients down. SORRY THERE AREN’T ANY FILMS YOU LIKE ON NETFLIX
My job as a defence lawyer is never to call my client a liar. But if the evidence is overwhelming it’s my job in a private consultation before the police interview to gently point out the holes in their story as I know the police will ask them. I ask “what about this?” and
@legaltweetz
Fellow lawyer here. I applaud your bravery. Transphobes usually run out of steam when their bullying doesn't work. They're all scared little keyboard warriors.
To all the new followers: Hi. Thank you for taking an interest in that case. I tweet anonymously about my cases and not very often. I only tweet that which was heard in open court and don’t indentify the persons involved.
@svfmxr
@GlennyRodge
I experience the same in my job a lot. If a young black man is acting strangely when detained by the police it’s always “high on crack” when there is no evidence of it. When it’s a young white man they always call the mental health team because they assume it’s a health issue.
Sorry for my little rant. My point is that the
#SarahEverard
case highlights that which I see every day: people assume police officers are acting lawfully and do as they’re told because if they don’t (even when the police aren’t acting lawfully) they get brutalised.
RT’d this earlier. People need to understand how few police they send if a kid is stabbed to death. This is some unarmed hippies making a very good point and they send a dozen vehicles and 50+ officers including an armed response unit.
If your home is ever broken into and a lone police officer turns up three days later, remember how the Metropolitan Police respond to people breaking into Russian billionaire oligarchs’ homes.
@billybarrett123
@RJMrgn
Three years later and you still appear to be thinking your OWN thoughts. Very disappointed that you took nothing away from those seminars, mate.
@ElenaBjxrn
@sliderulesyou
😳😳😳😳Holy shit.
I do the weekly shopping so I buy my wife’s sanitary products and I at least know they don’t get stuck on her ladygarden. I’m guessing she eats them with a hot drink.
I’m not saying I’m a leading expert on detecting when someone who has obviously broken the law is making up a tissue of lies to cover it up, but oh wait that’s exactly what I’m saying. I am. He’s lying. And actually - you don’t need to do my job to know it. You know it too.
@PhilosophyTube
@sliderulesyou
I'm a white cìshet bloke but Labour's stance on the trans community and Gaza (in the main) meant I couldn't bring myself to vote for them. Solidarity with every marginalised person feeling real fear right now in this country.
@MMargolyes
@FoulTechie
I’m a regular Today listener and a leftie. My Dad is a regular Today listener and a Times-reading, Tory voter. We both thought your comment was beautifully worded and hilarious - as did 95% of listeners. It’s manufactured outrage by those who usually shout “free speech”
If you come into my workplace with Covid simply because your symptoms are mild, you will be leaving with severe symptoms of having been kicked down the fucking stairs.
Situations in which it’s justified to have a loud conversation in a gig: never. Not ever. People around you are having their evening ruined by you. Some people have travelled miles and booked hotels just to see that band. You selfish selfish selfish selfish wankstain.
I’m a 46 year old man having a lazy Sunday so of course I saw the chiminea with snow on and decided it looked like a man with a beard and a hat on and decided I had to make eyes for it and got spotted by the neighbours in just my t-shirt, pants and wellies sticking them on
I am now reliably informed it was on Radio 4 today. I suspect that’s where she heard it. She text it to me. It amused me. I searched for it on twitter and couldn’t find it so thought I would share.
I remain perplexed by the phrase “an ass that just won’t quit” which I first heard in some 80s buddy cop movie as a signifier of a cute bum - but in my head it has always conjured an image of someone with chronic diarrhoea sitting on the throne and cursing their anus.
It is also an illegal abuse of police powers. My firm and several others will be representing those arrested without good cause today and thereafter looking to sue
@metpoliceuk
Alexei Sayle is still the most wonderful stand up there is. Not seen him to stand up for about 20 years and he remains articulate, furious, silly, surreal and incredibly warm. Go see him if you can.
In a cafe in the Cotswolds. They keep dog biscuits behind the counter as lots of dog walkers stop by. Some of the regular dogs know this. Several of them have got very excited as soon as they see the counter even though biccies not visible
As well as her constant tweets about getting herself arrested on climate change and anti racism protests, you all now Jane Fonda is the Queen of Instagram because of this, right?