Belfast Telegraph Night Editor. Multi-award-winning journalist. Author of best-selling novel 'Malcolm Brodie & Me'. Views are my own, and not those of the paper
Daddy, are you SURE this is a better bedtime read than the Three Little Pigs?
PS: thanks to everyone who has been reading and enjoying my daddy's new book.
#malcolmbrodieandme
Conservative MP to John Hume in the 1990s: "The thought of you speaking to IRA murderers makes me sick to my stomach".
John Hume: "You're not the one who walks behind the coffins."
#GFA
One of the sad things about last night's chanting by the Irish women footballers was that none of them were born when the IRA campaign was at its nastiest.
When you've seen someone after they've been blown to pieces, as I have, you can't help but be nauseated by this behaviour.
89 years old and seriously ill with cancer, yet still he came here and spoke. This courageous, remarkable man is one of my all-time heroes.
#GeorgeMitchell
#GFA25
Young folk occasionally ask: "How good was George Best?"
To which I reply: Imagine if Lionel Messi was naturally two-footed, could head the ball like Ronaldo and was as fast as Mbappe. THAT'S how good Bestie was...
What Gary Lineker wrote yesterday was simply outrageous.
How DARE he compare today's right-wing rhetoric to what was said in Nazi Germany in the 1930s?
Can't think where he got that crazy idea from.
PS: Here's a cartoon that appeared in the Daily Mail in 2015...
#garylineker
How Northern Ireland works...
Sunday: Donagadee is named in the Sunday Times as one of the best places in the UK to live.
Last night: Paramilitaries force people out of their homes in Donaghadee.
Question: I've never met Phillip Schofield or any of his former colleagues (except Eamonn Holmes).
But I've known about him and his, erm, young boyfriend for many years, as has virtually everyone else in the UK media. So how on earth did his ITV bosses and colleagues NOT know?
How Northern Ireland works:
Earlier this week... Arlene Foster: "Joe Biden hates the United Kingdom".
Later this week... Arlene Foster will be one of 25 women honoured by Hillary Clinton for "making a significant contribution to peace” in Northern Ireland.
It was really thoughtful of retail giant Marks & Spencer to set aside specific parking spaces for middle-aged, beer-bellied men like me who enjoy being in control of the barbecue.
Reporter: "Mr Hume, other MPs in the Commons are saying that the thought of you talking to representatives of paramilitary killers sickens them. What do you say to that?"
John Hume: "They are not the ones who walk behind the coffins..."
#RIPJohnHume
Spare a thought today for my old pal, former Man United manager Tommy Docherty - the flamboyant, charismatic Scot who turned the club around brilliantly after relegation in the mid-1970s. I'm told 'The Doc' is very poorly. Let's hope you pull though, mate.
#TommyDocherty
#MUFC
How the media works:
On today's Daily Mail front page: "LIZ JONES: So why DOES Duchess Meghan always wear utterly impractical white?"
PS: Here's a professionally taken picture of Liz Jones. Wearing white...
BREAKING NEWS: PSNI Chief Constable Simon Byrne has called on Ulster Unionist Party leader Steve Aiken to resign immediately.
According to Mr Bryne: "Steve Aiken has lost the confidence of all listeners to this morning's Stephen Nolan Show and his position is now untenable..."
Caller 'Harold from Portadown' on today's Nolan radio show: "Tell Biden to stay away; he's a full-blown Romanist..."
Makes you proud to be from Northern Ireland, doesn't it?🤦♂️
It's absolutely disgraceful that Umbro feel they need to apologise for Linfield FC's new kit colours. Apologise for what... a coincidence? Also, the last time I checked, the UVF didn't hold exclusive rights to purple and orange...
#LinfieldKit
#LinfieldFC
This is a man who served in Afghanistan and Iraq, survived a 14-day fight-to-the-death with the Taliban in Garmsir and won the Military Cross and Queen's Commendation for Bravery.
Do you really think threat from the UDA is going to scare him?
#DougBeattie
30 years ago today. Warrington. Lest we forget. Remember these two photographs next time you're tempted to sing a song glorifying the murderers of three-year-old Jonathan Ball and 12-year-old Tim Parry.
#Warrington
Maybe Casement Park should change its name to ‘Dundonald Ice Bowl’. Then there’d be guaranteed funding, proper timeline... and no objections. My column in the
@BelTel
today.
Last week... NI Health Minister Robin Swann describes Sir Van Morrison's lyrics as "dangerous".
Today... NI Health Minister Robin Swann tells the public: “We need to move from the dark end of the street to the bright side of the road.”
The man really does have a sense of humour.
A very happy 80th birthday - and many more of them - to the legend that is my great friend Jeekie Fullerton. One of a kind, Jeekie. Have a great day.
#JackieFullerton
I loved it when Michael O'Neill was first appointed to the NI job, and someone pointed out to him that he was the first locally-born Catholic to accept the post.
His reply: "So what? I'm not here to say Mass..."🤣
Best of luck, me old pal and one-time Ballymena neighbour.
#GAWA
Quote of the day: "I'm going for England, because we're part of Great Britain" (Belfast man on Radio Ulster's Good Morning Ulster programme).
Will you tell him or shall I? 😀
Military Cross recipient
@BeattieDoug
and his courageous colleagues never fliched for a second when being pinned down by Taliban gunfire, day upon day, in Garmsir.
I'm not sure a broken office window in Portadown is going to terrify him.
@BelTel
Just to prove that the DUP have got their priorities right at Westminster, Jim Shannon has tabled an Early Day Motion... to celebrate the 50-year anniversary of the release of Dolly Parton's I Will Always Love You...
Somewhere, at a keyboard near you, at least one Northern Ireland journalist is flexing their fingers and getting ready to type an intro that begins with "Heavy rain failed to dampen spirits..." 🤦♀️
#thetwelfth
Larne FC are about to win the Irish League for the first time in their history and I know of one gentleman who, if he was still with us today, could not be happier about that. Indeed, he'd be organising the parties. Thinking of you, cove, as always.
#RIPDavySmyth
@larnefc
@mrjamesob
@campbellclaret
Re the Northern Ireland protocol... Either Boris Johnson hadn't a clue what he was signing up to, or knew full well and went ahead with it anyway. Whichever way you look at it...
How the media works:
There was obviously no room in this piece for Rio Ferdinand to declare that he and Newcastle owner Mike Ashley are actually business partners, and that Ferdinand's FIVE fashion range is available exclusively from Ashley's Sports Direct outlets.
#NewcastleFC
How Northern Ireland works:
FM Arlene Foster, who refused to resign after the RHI scandal, is furious at PSNI Chief Constable Simon Byrne for refusing to resign following today's fall-out over Bobby Storey's funeral, after which DFM Michelle O'Neill refused to resign...
To me, this is a photograph that sums up the respect in which Walter Smith was held in Glasgow. Here, he helps carry the coffin of Celtic legend Tommy Burns out of St Mary's chapel in 2008.
#ripwaltersmith
I've just been informed that my friend and former colleague Dessie Blackadder, editor of the Ballymena Guardian, has fallen ill and is currently in hospital. Best wishes for a speedy recovery, Dessie. You're in my thoughts and, I've no doubt, the thoughts of many others today.
Emma Raducanu isn't the only Canadian-born sporting hero who moved from their birthplace in Ontario to the UK when they were a toddler...
#JimmyNick
#GAWA
Called in to a Belfast newsagent today to buy a paper. As I tried to pay for it: "It's a 30p charge for contactless payments."
Sorry, but I'll eat my own feet before giving in to extortion like that.
2005: Ballymena DUP councillor Maurice Mills says Hurricane Katrina was sent by God to punish gays.
2020: Ballymena DUP councillor John Carson says Covid-19 is God's punishment for gay marriage.
Plus ça change...
#Covid19UK
#CouncillorJohnCarson
Important question: when did you last see (or need, or buy) a tin of Kiwi shoe polish? When I was growing up, every house had at least one knocking around.
Ask any employee of the Belfast Telegraph, from the 1960s through to the 2000s, who their favourite colleague was - and, invariably, this wonderful man's name will come up. My/OUR great friend Colin McMullan died today. I love you, man. I will NEVER forget you.
RIP, dear Colly.
Re earlier tweets this evening...
2017: Glenavon FC introduce new orange and purple away kit (see below)
No one says a word. No one apologises.
2020: Linfield FC introduce new orange and purple away kit and...
#LinfieldKit
Eight years ago today, the person who had the biggest influence on my life took a final curtain call from his own remarkable, glittering stage.
Master, mentor, confidant, genius, inspiration, companion, unforgettable friend.
Malcolm Brodie, 1926-2013. Fondly remembered, always.
PS: the irony is that a lot of the criticism levelled at Linfield FC is, by its very nature, both specific and sectarian; would Glenavon, for instance, have attracted similar flak if THEY had brought out a purple and orange away kit? I think not...
It's absolutely disgraceful that Umbro feel they need to apologise for Linfield FC's new kit colours. Apologise for what... a coincidence? Also, the last time I checked, the UVF didn't hold exclusive rights to purple and orange...
#LinfieldKit
#LinfieldFC
Congratulations to my old colleague
@BenLowry2
on his appointment as editor of the News Letter. Ben has been the unofficial voice of the paper for years now and fully deserves this appointment. A committed, meticulous journalist. Best of luck.
Devastated to hear of the death of Terry Smyth, former BBC NI head of sport. A great friend, a wonderful human being. All memories of time spent with Terry are good ones, and I'm sure I'm not alone in saying that. Rest in peace, dear Terry. One in a million.
Even though you may have been given the impression that there was only one competitor in the BBC's 'It's All About Matt Whitlock' Show this afternoon, our boy Rhys - the other UK native, who didn't rate a mention despite being world champion, appears to have ripped up the script
Today - 40 years ago - was my first day as a journalist with the newspaper I'm still with (!)
Where has the time gone?
Big thumbs-up to
@BelTel
editors past and present - Roy Lilley (God rest his soul), Ed Curran, Martin Lindsay and Eoin Brannigan - for their help and support.
And now for some good news: it's looking like there'll be no BBC Sports Personality of the Year in 2020. Anyway, it's time this dated, bloated smugfest was shelved for good. My column in today's
@BelTel
@BelTel_Sport
Fact: the funeral of the late, great Joey Dunlop, who died 20 years ago tomorrow, was, in terms of size, second only to Princess Diana's three years earlier. Yet in most of the national UK daily newspapers it didn't rate a single mention. Still sadly missed, Joey.
#JoeyDunlop
How the media works:
Just in case you were wondering, this is the same Richard Littlejohn who is a multi-millionaire, lives in a gated development in Florida - and who has been 'WFH' for the past 30 years...
So sorry to hear about the passing of my good pal and former
@BelTel
colleague Eddie McIlwaine. As everyone who knew him can testify, the word 'character' could have been invented for this legendary NI hack. My thoughts are with Irene, Zara and Edward at this sad time. RIP, mate.
Let's all be thankful the English tabloids have never resorted to such distasteful, xenophobic tactics when major football semi-finals come around.
No, wait a moment...
#FIFAWomensWorldCup
Thought for the day: I have a feeling there's (yet another) debate about the 'merits' an all-Ireland football team about to lurch, like a tired old dog, into view. You could set your watch by it. Never gonna happen.
#GAWA
Her: "Daddy, can I get a koala bear cuddly toy for my birthday?"
Me: "Tell you what... I'll get you one - if you can tell me where koala bears come from."
Her: "Amazon have them..."
Bloody Friday. I'm old enough to remember it, but still not old enough to understand why it happened.
This was Belfast's 9/11.
Rest in peace, the innocent victims of that horrific day.
#BloodyFriday
BREAKING NEWS: Linfield FC confirm they are moving from Windsor Park to Ballintoy on the Co Antrim coast.
"The colours in the sky suit our new-look brand," said a club spokesperson.
#LinfieldKit
How Northern Ireland works:
The UK's flagship cyber security conference, scheduled for Belfast next week, has been plunged into crisis... because of the simple leaking of a document urging visitors to stay clear of the city's black taxis ("run by the IRA") and housing estates.
Paddy Jackson must be thinking today that he'd be better off convicted of drink driving, like Ant McPartlin, than acquitted of all charges, like HE was
#PaddyJackson
Thought for the day: One year ago today, courageous ophthalmologist Dr Li Wenliang was in a police station, being reprimanded by the Chinese authorities for warning his colleagues about a new “Sars-like illness” he had become aware of, and would later die from. RIP.
#Covid19
@susie_dent
The unnecessary 'so' at the start of every answer to every question nowadays. And often at the start of the questions too.
And "if I'm being completely honest". Why should there be any doubt?
Thought for the day: next time you hear about our hospitals reaching or exceeding their capacity, ask this question: why are the five huge Nightingale hospitals, which were built at massive public expense for the very purpose of solving this problem, lying empty?
#Covid19UK
Breaking news: Saga Noren from
#TheBridge
is being brought in to Northern Ireland from Sweden to investigate why
#Bloodlands
is getting a second series (and to drive her vintage Porsche through the plot holes of the first...)
Whereas I was sad to hear of the death of Vivienne Westwood, I wish people in the media - my profession - would desist from blithely calling her an "anti-establishment icon".
She accepted an OBE in 1992 and a Damehood in 2006. There can be nothing more "establishment" than that.