Mountain cuisine propagandist. Rosary sayer. non-practicing intellectual. BEHAVING GACHERILY. Millenial Boomer. more likely to block you than argue with you.
I didn't know this had to be said, but:
Framing the mass death and displacement of millions of Black people as a win for
#climate
change is dehumanizing and racist.
I have a theory that the reason these D students think A students went to nowhere is that the A students operate in realms they are not even aware exist!
You are asking a Kilimani wash wash ‘entrepreneur’ to imagine the world of astronauts.
I was index 1 and I designed the terminal that supplies LPG to the entire country, yes you got that right. This MF cooks with gas that was stored in a facility that I designed.
Don't listen to such charlatans. Index 1s are doing just fine they are just not exceptionally rich
Niliwaambia Millenials tumebobea bureacracy.
We want to see
1. gazette notices,
2. Acts of parliament,
3.presidential memoranda
4. state office memos with specific directives
and such things. we know how things work, when they want to work.
Everytime I see the word croissant I have to remind the TL about my friend whose mwako massive extra kikuyu dad loves croissants za art caffe and treats himself every week and he orders them as “ile madaathi yenu” and the waiters at that branch know exactly what he means.
I’ve joined the aunties in expressing concern over my singlehood.
IT WORKS!
Auntie X: yaani bado hukapata mtu
Me: mjue nimeanza kuwashuku either hakuna maombi au prayers hazifiki.
Auntie Y: haki Liz nimeomba sana.
Me: lakini umefast?
Silence.
Me: nilijua tu hamko serious.
Lightskinned kikuyu men won’t break your heart; they’ll drag you down to their level from whence you shall wallow in self pity-revulsion.
They offer nothing except being light skinned, and the women who go for them have unresolved colourism issues and a high nonsense threshold.
@DopeWas
House husband, deadbeat dad, kupigana na wanaume wengine ovyo, violent towards kids just trash. Mbegu na last name only.
Lionesses need to make better choices!
An adult man stripped 𝗮 𝘁𝗲𝗲𝗻𝗮𝗴𝗲 𝗴𝗶𝗿𝗹 naked in front of 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐝𝐮𝐥𝐭 𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐞 𝐤𝐢𝐧, i.e. her father and uncles, and caned her while calling her promiscuous.
EVERY ADULT IN THAT STORY IS CULPABLE. He did it but they sanctioned it and present over its execution.
Shamed Into Suicide:
Police probe a chief linked to suicide of Form 1 student
Student died by suicide after she was caned in public
Her suicide note says she was humiliated
Chief reportedly also caned the father of the girl
Girl was caned for missing school
Turudi hapa:
At some point this week Ndii asked Boniface Mwangi where he was when he was fighting in the second liberation to which Boni said he was in nusery this is a good starting point. 🧵
There is a number I keep thinking about ‘12 billion shillings in 9 months for internal travel by Statehouse Nairobi’ that is a shit load of money, shouldn’t it somehow impacted the hospitality space positively??
#RejectFinanceBill2024
I will begin with a confession.
I’ve abandoned a friend to an abusive partner in the interest of self preservation.
On December 13, 2018 at her birthday party in their home her husband broke a bottle of vodka over her head …
The conversation about the place of a good friend when a loved one is being abused by a partner is ravaging. There are many contradictory, ugly realities and all of them are true.
I am thinking about Elianne Andam, who was just 15 when her friend's ex killed her with a machete.
Mudavadi is a boring man, like something about him is just deeply boring.
Kibaki was a bore but he wasn’t just plain boring.
Kibaki was freshly boiled salted Githeri ukipewa kikombe ya strungi inaimprove instantly.
Mudavadi is the hours it takes to boil that mix over 🪵.
My favourite thing I learned from a book this week is that the first planes that constituted Kenya airways were stolen from Tanzania.
in unfairness they belong to the East African Community both Tz and Kenya were trying to steal them; Kenya just had more practice stealing things
People who went to campus with me sent me this interview NIJIKUMBUKE!
I used to unprompted introduce myself as, “Gacheri, a spiritual being having a human experience.” 😂😂😂😂
I pray she enjoys this phase KABISA!
the reason LSK were asking for full names ni juu wakili anaweza enda police station kutafuta mtu na ako na right ya kuinspect cells ajihakikishie mtu anatafuta hako huko.
Haki mko all heart and no brains
Leo jioni nikimaliza kazi nitawaelezea what is happening here.
Basically the government is moving (and being resisted) to take over Catholic universities and hospitals to fully subsume them into the public system.
The missionary permits fees is simply government squeezing.
Doctors WITHDREW THEIR SERVICES.
I didn’t hear of doctors kidnapping patients to prevent them from getting medical care.
Kidnapping women and threatening them with harm is criminal behavior not civil disobedience.
KUWENI SERIOUS.
WOMEN ARE NOT COLLATERAL DAMAGE.
It is the most popular hormonal contraceptive among Kenyan women across all age groups.
Partly because it is the most affordable going for anywhere between 100-1000 KES.
Lets not talk about why it is not used in USA UK and EU. I honestly sometimes just want to weep about this.
Citizens seeking a state service are not clients.
A passport is an identification document issued by a state to its citizens.
We are not buying the passport; the money paid facilitates the process of being issued with one, the actual issuance is A RIGHT see C.O.K art. 12 (1).
We regret to inform our clients that we are currently experiencing a downtime that has affected our normal passport application receiving and collection services. Our engineers are working to resolve the issue and ensure the resumption of normal services as soon as possible.
The idea here is you graduate already in debt and significant debt at that.
Graduate owing your government almost a million bob! Walianza hivi 🇺🇸 na siku hizi every politician huko campaigns on reducing student debt.
THE NEW UNIVERSITY FUNDING MODEL BANDS EXPLAINED:
Band 1: For families with a monthly income up to Sh5,995
Band 2: For families with a monthly income up to Sh23,670
Band 3: For families with a monthly income up to Sh70,000
Band 4: For families with a monthly income up to
I can’t believe I’m RTing Sonko but here we are:
Fam,millennials grew up in the bar.
This is normal. Uko tu kwa bar na wazazi unaangalia watu wakubwa wakidance ndombolo!
That is why we are so at home huko. That was OUR PLAYGROUND
My weirdest 2022 story is that on 24th May afternoon, I went to KNH to donate blood for someone. The guy behind the desk starts flirting -enough to make me uncomfortable- then he asked me for my number I politely declined.
Nikajaza form and handed it back in to them nikangoja.
Cecile Emeke did a whole YouTube series called walking. If people had watched it they would understand why it happened this way. The rules for Italian citizenship are very different for black people.
As a babe from the mountain I want to tell you hiii story ya ‘boy child’ imetoka wapi but naogopa kufukukuzwa kwetu.
Long story short after years of kudekeza ‘kababa’ kinawaramba wamama and they have decided as usual that their daughters are the problem.
Listen, we have tried to have this forced hugging conversation with WABABA and random mens to no avail.
So please I need the Muslim community to make an example of him for the sake of all the rest of us.
Their leaders organized for their people took back mineral rights etc. University is still free and govt gives chicken, goats and cows to its poorest citizens to improve life quality. Being over 18 and living in the areas identified is the only qualification.
You know who has been walking this journey with Rita Waeni’s family? The community that is African Inland Church Mukimwani.
Who kept walking with the family of Benson Njiru and Emmanuel Mutura long after the hype wore off? The community that is Kianjokoma Catholic Church.
Context: hii ni ile leadership course ya wiki tatu yenye criteria ya kujoin haihitaji grades; so long as you can pay for it unaweza ifanya.
It costs $7,000 na ukimaliza unapewa certificate “acknowledging successful completion of leadership courses at HKS”
Joho goes back to school, has joined Harvard Kennedy School. This such a good way to spend your retirement as you plot for other ventures. All the best
@HassanAliJoho
The thing people don’t understand is that Eliud is no longer your village hero.
He is a global brand worth millions of dollars.
His communications are handled by a global team and go through several layers of approval.
The access you are demanding exists only in your heads.
And the funny thing is that the D students who have actually made it, by all metrics, deeply understand how a good education or academic success would have helped ease their journey and kill themselves to give it to their children.
They are price gouging.
Sio ati nini au nini.
Nimeona stori nyingi explaining when the answer is simple price gouging.
Kuna siku nilisema I ship in the deo I like- among other things- na ni juu one box of 5 (plus shipping and taxes) is cheaper than 1 of them at carrefour.
We won’t look to a country that gives women two weeks maternity leave when deciding how we will go about our paid leave.
That country has women with lochia bleeds in the office all with the milk still leaking from their breasts.
TUNYAMAZIE!
@CornerErides
I've worked in the USA for over 30 years, I've never had a paid Jewish or Muslim holiday. I've never had Good Friday paid either. Christmas is the only Christian holiday I've ever had as a paid vacation day.
I no longer get angry that doctors insist on running a pregnancy test on women no matter what brought them in.
Patient: Oh nikaanguka nikavunjika mguu.
Doc: sawa but wacha kwanza tuangalie kama uko pekee yako inawezekana uliangushwa na kisunzi.
You people won’t want to hear this, but this is a historical truth.
Ndio maana 50 years later Meru youth walikimbilia kwa Wakikuyu en masse wakaingia MauMau.
The elders had sold them out.
You people hate hearing this but single means not married.
This isn’t cheating. If you’ve been dating someone for two years and you both haven’t decided where it’s going and someone comes along with faster decision-making.
My sister be light ndio ubebeke rahisi.
Stop amplifying nonsense.
Let that woman grieve.
Ciru has been a target of the manosphere for years. She probably has most of these people blocked.
This narrative will most likely reach her bubble because you are amplifying it and making it ‘discourse.’
Maybe the reason D students have not heard from A students in a minute is they live in a world you can’t even imagine exists.
The reason you think you made it because you drive X car and rub shoulders with politicians is that those are the limits of your imagination.
More people need to have honest conversations with their mom.
My mother told me
1. Don’t marry/have kids young because it makes you forever dependent on men. She married and had a kid (me) at 19.
2. Don’t go near older men, they’re losers. Her man was 15+ years older.
Guys, would you be bothered if you read a diary that your mom wrote when you were 8 months old, talking about how she doesn’t like being a mom and her struggles?? (assuming it never affected you bc she was a good mom to you).
Life is so unpredictable mtu mlisoma naye lived together from nursery school to primary unashtukia asubuhi unaona news ati ni murder suspect now headed to life in jail and juzi juzi tu saw his fb status.. Weuh Clinton Mwangi khai 😬😬homies tumeshtuka
Imagine being so scared of your parents that you hang yourself because You don’t know how to tell them that you lost 300 bob.
Last week, I was at a Mass for a kid who killed himself over 1000 bob.
The kids are not okay.
Huku online we have to start with telling the truth about how education is a valid path out of poverty and anyone who says otherwise is lying.
#FeesMustFall
It is also the most accessible path to majority of this country.
Per a study by APHRC, 64.4% of all abortions in Kenya are procured by married women.
16.5% are girls aged 10-19.
Hako kaslice kamebaki ndio single women wenye huwekelewa abortions hata na mapastor.
Not mapadre because those ones know vile kuko.
We are not going to say this of the Kenyan university students whose side hustle is writing academic papers for American university students PLEASE.
You guys just enjoy shitting on the youth. Stop lying on them.
Save for JKUAT, is there a Kenyan institution that uses formal/official referencing & citation?
I know there's no Kenyan undergrad who can tell you what APA, OSCOLA, MLA, CMS, Harvard Referencing Styles are.
And they cite Wikipedia like the Bible.
Kuitwa hako kaofisi he starts berating me, “hii ni namba ya nani umeandika hapa?” Apparently he had taken the number from the form and tried calling it, ikaenda kwingine.
He demanded I write down my actual number and when I refused he barred me from donating blood. THE END.
I know a babe in Nairobi whose husband left her because she quit her job without consulting him, and he only found out about it when it became a single income home.
He was right to do so, she had a clear pattern (habit even) of not sticking to the mutually agreed-upon plans.
Unpopular opinion. Quitting your job without consulting with your wife, to chase a hip hop dream at 30+ while she pays the bills and you flirt with your female best friend is definitely grounds for getting cheated on 😂
Nobody thought he was actually smoking teargas so there is nothing you are debunking.
Sisi sio wajinga tunajia teargas ni chemicals tena huwa explosive.
We were, and still are, marveling at the aesthetic.
I am very pro-therapy.
But my thing is that if Kenyan therapists do not contextualize their learnings to our context, afadhali tu ikae.
Mtu anaishi in a country with totally broken social service systems, one medical bill away from abject poverty, ana ‘cut them off’ alafu?!
Nikisomea M.A nilifundishwa a barrier called reification.
This happens when people treat abstract pliant ideas as concrete.
🇰🇪’s diet is largely vegetarian but you can’t see that because you have bound yourself to a specific received definition “vegetarian.”
Listen to me if you come across a kikuyu woman of her age, in this hairstyle (or that sharp kapermed bob), those eyebrows and A RED LIP just know SHE IS SWIMMING IN CASH AND MASHAMBA.
Also that is the rich kikuyu woman laugh - confident with just a dash of coy!
And there is a straight line from this to the fact that millennials are having to pay higher black tax than Gen X did.
Please everything is interconnected.
If your parents are threatened with abject poverty in their old age, you are then required to stand in for the state!
On a somehow related note
@NonieMG
remember our conversation on how when you are friends with rich kids, you are actively putitng yourself in danger because their sense of danger and consequence is very off?
I feel the same about them leading and conversation on social change.
If you are between the age of 21-30 please take this very seriously.
Its very hard to make friends after you leave the institutions and you won’t have friends in your 30s when you definitely need them if you don’t hold onto them in this period and holding on to them is hard!
I want you to imagine Tenwek hospital which is run by the Africa Gospel Church (juu they want to take over all mission hospitals) and is Kenya's largest mission hospital as a govenrment facility.
understaffed, underresourced and overmeddled in.
… he stabbed a different friend’s husband in the arm with the sharded end in his hand when he rushed to intervene. He also beat her mom and bros who weren’t trying to beat him rather extract her.
I did nothing to help her. I hid behind the couch till the coast was clear.
In this story her husband bought the land and built the house her mother lives in.
He also pays fees for some of her bro’s kids.
To be in her life is to agree to be a witness which by the way has value in and of itself.
But I don’t have it in me to give that.
@obaa_boni
It is easy to become defeated and helpless when alone in an abusive situation - please remember the person being abused is ALONE.
If you are overwhelmed trying to help them part time imagine how much more overwhelmed they are, and they are in that personalised hell fulltime.
Merus have to thank kikuyus juu wamehog spotlight mpaka no one sees our madness. We know we are worse ON ALL FRONTS.
As a kyuk enda tu uishi Meru (anywhere) three months, hakuna kitu itawahi kushtua tena.
If you feel brave enda kwenye Munya ametoka utaokoka vita na vurugu.
It is important that we begin by stressing the youth of the MauMau for this conversation.
Growing up in Mount Kenya we think of Mau Mau as old/adults because we grew up seeing them OLD.
Think of MauMau lore as your grandparents' campus shennanigans
There is a psychological barrier that has been broken na hata sijui tena.
This could have been over on last Friday morning but people chose to grandstand!
In my mind’s eye I saw death.
I still see it clearly whenever I see her.
Hers or someone in the splash zone.
I chose to not be in the splash zone.
I avoided others in the splash zone because I wanted emotional insulation.
But everything said in this thread I agree with.
The thing is that being in community with someone who is facing violent abuse can put us directly in harm's way.
So many have died this way.
At the same time leaving our loved ones alone with abusers is impossible.
So many have died this way.
Kikuyu men know their primary target audience is kikuyu women and no matter what kikuyu women say about kikuyu men, those are their kings.
In fact generally huko milimani kikuyu men huchukuliwa draft 1.
When you are your type’s type hata waseme nini hutishiki!
Kikuyu men get slandered every day on this app but I never see them get up in arms the way those Kalenjins are on that post. Kings who know their worth. 😆😆😆
This painting was by a woman Artemisia Gentileschi who was raped… and it delicts the scene in the bible where Judith beheads Holofernes who had planned to rape her.
It was the first time it had been painted by a woman and let me say ilitetemesha.
I hate how we talk about perfumes online because we ignore how much of a perfume “working” for you has to do with your body chemistry.
I met this girl at CJs last year and she smelled incredible. So I asked her what she was wearing and it was literally just Tommy Girl.
The MauMau movement was a radical liberation movement led by young people movement.
e.g., MauMau luminary Dedan Kimathi was 29 when after five years in active politics in Kenya African Union, he gave up on the political system and took the Mau Mau oath; 36 when he died.
I still don’t have the words to describe the terror I felt while hiding behind that couch.
Worried he would find me- he wasn’t looking though.
I hate loud noises and everywhere was shouting and screams. I was completely overstimulated.
I drink ciders. Many were drunk.
Please note we don’t need new laws to stop allocating CDF.
It is unconstitutional so treasury just needs to stop allocating them money.
CDF na office of first lady same wozzap.
The only way to shut these raggedy MPs up for good, and get them legislating is to do away with CDF.
That unconstitutional 200 Million annually that Nabii pays EACH MPig to dance to his tune.
They talk like this because they’re singing for their supper 🚮
Do you people who go to akina Ellen Degeneres and lie that you learned English from watching their shows SEE WHAT YOU HAVE DONE?!
Stop lying! Just tell them how English was beaten into you in school!
Let them know you were punished if you said ‘talk’ instead of ‘converse.’
This thread is accurate but expensive.
If you can’t afford a lawyer get barua ya chief upeleke kwa DO akupe barua alafu upeleke kwa DC.
The DC will give you a letter to take to all banks asking them to surrender hiyo pesa kwa serikali. After 2 weeks enda kwa DC upewe cheque.
You then collect all information such as bank account numbers, title deeds, insurance policies, cars and any other asset and you engage a lawyer so you can begin the succession process at the courts. You have to try to capture everything before all this information is gazetted.
The MauMau were fighting for Kenya's independence. The republic of Kenya is 61 years old i.e., older than any of the current crop of Mt. Kenya politicians.
The current crop of Mt. Kenya politicians are not the children of MauMau and they need to stop claiming to be.
I haven’t spoken to anyone who was at that party since.
I’ve literally made eye contact with her at Junction and rerouted to avoid her.
Her hubby once called out to me at VM, I ‘didn’t hear’ him.
Do I feel guilty? yes.
If I run into her today will I say hi? NO
If you people don’t understand the danger of popular discourse that denigrates the value of education as a life pathway at a time when your education system is being systematically dismantled I cannot help you.
I want someone to tell me what Karen Nyamu’s actual skill is juu SHE MUST HAVE ONE.
And I know sio ngono juu trust me sex can’t get you that much leverage.
Akiwa tu hivyo ako there is something about her politicians value enough to work to keep her close.
Hear me out:
People were there with their partners. I was there alone so no one was looking out for me.
Her six year old daughter was hiding with me and her sniffling is the reason I was worried about discovery. Also I read expectations and questions I didn’t want to acknowledge in her eyes.
You people, marches matter.
Demonstrating your issue can marshal boots on the ground matters.
Tukuwe serious kidogo please.
Don’t our politicians pour their jackboots onto our streets whenever they need to unlock their behind closed doors negotiations?
Tukuwe serious.
When he went upstairs to do God knows what I slipped out the door na nikawaacha wote huko wajisort wenye wanapelekwa hospitali wapelekwe wa polisi waende polisi.
I knew this had been going on since before they got married but I had never seen it.
Here is my thing.
When people gave her this money, it was a good faith gesture. In fact there was no contractual obligation on her end to give sijui audit reports.
The low level accounting she was doing, was actually good enough for the people who gave the money (1/2).
The sad thing about government bloggers hating on Hanifa is how stupid and uninformed they are, what did you expect an audit report to look like? Have y'all never seen an audit report?
COLD FACTS.
Also, a lot of kids who are middle-class/upper middle-class/rich at home don’t settle well abroad.
Same applies to girls who are conventionally beautiful in Kenya, their beauty doesn’t translate well abroad. But discussions za beauty nimeshelve kwa sasa.
The thing is Kindiki KNOWS this doesn’t make sense.
He has a PHD in international law.
I want people to understand that the nonsense this government is serving us is DELIBERATE. They aren’t dumb; this is by design.
In his book those who remain G. Michael Hopf says
“Hard times create strong men. Strong men create good times. Good times create weak men. And, weak men create hard times."
In case you missed it, we live in hard times. (tbc)