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Freddy Quinne

@FreddyQuinne

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💀 Co-host of @deadmentalkpod 💀 GET TICKETS FOR MY 2024 UK & IRELAND TOUR👇

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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
4 months
When I started comedy almost 14 years ago, all I wanted to do was go on tour. I wasn’t bothered about being on television, I didn’t care about having a big agent, I just wanted to be the best stand up comedian I could be, performing what I found funny to a room full of people
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
6 years
Katie Hopkins is all but bankrupt after losing her case v. Jack Monroe. Here's what you do now. Block her. Unfollow her. Do not read any of her articles. Turn over any TV show with her on. She makes money when people engage with her,. Don't let her have that. A fitting end.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
17 days
Not saying Harry Kane went missing in that first half, but there’s a group of mums on Facebook that think he’s stuck to a cactus in Tenerife
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
6 months
From Saudi Arabia to Holland. Two countries where getting stoned means completely different things.
@FabrizioRomano
Fabrizio Romano
6 months
🚨🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 EXCL: Ajax are showing concrete interest in signing Jordan Henderson in case he’ll get green light to leave Al Ettifaq in January transfer window. There are several clubs keen, waiting for Saudi club decision — but Henderson is looking for options and Ajax are there.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
6 months
The five stages of grief. One - Denial
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
3 months
Mad how you ran the length of Africa, probably saw the most incredible things but also the most extreme poverty, and then ran straight into the arms of a bloke who announced he’s cutting benefits for millions of people this week.
@hardestgeezer
Russ Cook
3 months
Morning run with the prime minister. Sharp change from the morning runs I have got used to over the last year🤣 It was a massive privilege to get the opportunity to run with the prime minister yesterday and poke my head around 10 Downing Street. Something I’ll enjoy telling the
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
7 months
Eating dinner off the table cause the daft fuckers stuck all his plates to the wall
@GNev2
Gary Neville
7 months
Merry Christmas everyone ❤️🎄
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
1 month
“Pubs are empty and I blame it on….” *spins wheel* “….. minimum wage workers!”
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
12 days
I will never understand this. What, you got somewhere important to be in Gelsenkirken have you lads?
@TJFrancisLive
Tyrone Francis
12 days
Analysis from some of the England fans leaving the stadium early.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
5 months
I promise you now if Curtis Jones had have done this exact thing at Anfield you’d be tweeting about a special connection with the fans and how the club and the staff have this unique bond
@Carra23
Jamie Carragher
5 months
By all means enjoy it, but enjoy it by being disciplined! #ARSLIV
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
4 months
Yeah but you know what there’s loads of? Food banks. So maybe get off twitter and, you know, sort it out.
@Conservatives
Conservatives
4 months
There’s only one St George’s cross 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
24 days
Ranking every team in Euro 2024 so far IMPRESSIVE Germany Spain LOOKING SOLID France England Portugal GOT THE JOB DONE Italy Netherlands SURPRISINGLY GOOD Romania Slovakia Austria Czech Republic Switzerland SURPRISINGLY BAD Croatia Belgium Ukraine PLUCKY
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
4 months
If I was in charge of Nike I’d issue an apology, change the England kit back to normal with the correct colours of the flag, but then change the three lions logo to two XL bullies shagging each other up the arse.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
8 months
Wait till Nella Rose hears about Australia having the ashes
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
12 days
Americans really thought they were onto something with the Hawk Tuah girl. Took the British all of three days to find a prison officer who made her look like Mother Theresa.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
2 years
Ladbaby being Xmas number 1 five years in a row is the best example I can give as to why some people shouldn't be allowed to vote.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
4 months
Just a reminder that a couple of weeks ago the police couldn’t catch a man in London with half his fucking face missing, yet we’re supposed to believe you’re gonna boot up Kodi and a dozen coppers are gonna kick your door in
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
1 year
The biggest tragedy of all is that if Harry Kane leaves Spurs, we'll never get to hear him try and say "Postecoglou".
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
6 months
Imagine going viral for being 16 but looking old as fuck, getting backlash for holding a copy of The Sun with a kebab, having everyone call your mrs a pedo and also winning hundreds of thousands of pounds all in the space of a week. Luke Littler has had a proper mad one.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
6 years
Best part of #TheApprentice is when Lord Sugar makes them meet at random places for no reason. "Meet me at the bottom of a well in 20 minutes." *Half an hour later* "I've brought you here because a well is dark and damp, perfect for developing film. Start a photography business"
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
3 months
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@StokeyyG2
george
3 months
You’re sick if you enjoy this Liverpool and Jurgen Klopp downfall.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
5 months
Hi @metpoliceuk - please note there is no need to investigate me for illegally streaming footy on IPTV as I have now jumped off Chelsea Bridge and into the Thames. There is no CCTV of the incident but it definitely happened.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
8 months
“If you stop and film every horse that bums you, you’ll never reach your destination”
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
1 year
Hi @theJeremyVine - just wondered if you're cycling round London at this moment in time? Only I'm about to back the car out of my driveway in Preston and I wouldn't want you thinking I was getting too close.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
10 months
In 2006 I went swimming in the sea. No sharks attacked me. Later my friend went and no sharks attacked him. Therefore based on my experience I find all shark attacks very hard to believe. Innocent until proven guilty.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
10 months
Russell Brand? Wow. It's always the people you most suspect.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
6 months
I have become obsessed with XL bully internet. Middle aged blokes wearing a muzzle to the pub in solidarity. Some fella doing raps sat next to his dog that looks on bemused. Photoshops of bullys in heaven with captain Tom and Princess Diana. It is limitless entertainment.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
6 months
Five - Acceptance
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
9 months
@Jaack He’s quite far back in the stadium so would have seen the goal later than the people at the front.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
8 months
Tony Bellew in I’m A Celeb looks like both Max and Paddy at the same time
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
2 months
Nine months sober today. Still haven’t gotten used to it. It is daily mental torture and over summer it’s only going to get harder. Shout out to every bar and pub that makes non-alcoholic beer the same price as normal beer even though you don’t pay the same tax on it. Pricks.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
6 months
Troy Deeney sacked by Forest Green. Managed six games, won 0. Got a four game touchline ban nine days in. Called all his players shite last week. This was his first managerial job.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
10 months
Hypothetically speaking, if I was a massive star with a chequered past I knew was going to catch up with me soon and destroy my career, then I'd probably try and court a new audience of people who distrust mainstream media so when the news broke they wouldn't believe it.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
6 months
Two - Anger
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
6 months
To be fair to Jordan Henderson it’s not like Saudi Arabia has a history of not paying migrant workers
@FootyAccums
Footy Accumulators
6 months
Jordan Henderson has not yet earned a penny of his £350,000-a-week wages from Al-Ettifaq, having deferred salary payments. Sources close to the player believe he may never be paid for the six months he spent there. [Telegraph]
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
6 months
Three - Bargaining
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
6 months
Four - Depression
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
6 months
Feels like a waste of a front row seat but whatever
@PicturesFoIder
non aesthetic things
6 months
She is blind but Beyoncé was making sure she felt her presence ❤️
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
1 year
Petition to televise Rolf Harris' funeral and have Phillip Schofield present it. We could call it This Mourning.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
6 months
What?! You mean the guy that paid his accuser 12 million pounds of taxpayer money to stop talking about it? The guy who went on TV and told everyone it was medically impossible for him to sweat? That guy was LYING?! Well I never.
@BBCNews
BBC News (UK)
6 months
Prince Andrew named in Jeffrey Epstein court documents
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
9 months
Ring your fucking bell and give the bloke a chance to put the dog on a lead. Christ I hate cyclists- never their fault is it.
@H_H_Gray
Harry Gray
9 months
Opinions on erratic dogs off leads on shared paths?
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
4 months
Kate Middleton is absolutely fine
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
23 days
@Kyyyy1234321 I did. The scoreline flattered them massively
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
2 years
Just listened to the #LadBaby song. Absolutely horrific. The idea of some Tory voting millionaires singing "Feed The UK" while not disclosing how much of your money they're donating to food banks is fucking nauseating.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
7 months
Joey Barton is a clown. Male and female pundits talk bollocks in equal measure. In fact, if I think about it, the best pundit I’ve heard in a while is Emma Hayes and the worst is Gabby Agbonglahor. Maybe don’t worry about gender and just get rid of thick ex-players.
@Joey7Barton
Joey Barton 🦁
7 months
Stand by everything I’ve said on Women commenting and co-comms on the Men’s football. Like me talking about Knitting or Netball. Way out of my comfort zone. Some of the Men are bad enough! We have gone too far. You cannot watch a game now without hearing the nonsense. Any
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
6 months
I can’t be the only person that thinks stuff like this is the saddest thing in the world. Screams of a loveless marriage existing only because of a mutual understanding between both parties that they are financially trapped with one another until death.
@PintsBeauty
Pints Of Beauty
6 months
These home pubs are brilliant! The Stags Head this time in Mansfield, Nottinghamshire. I definitely think my new years resolution has been decided...
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
2 years
Ah yes the famously anti-woke Peter Kay and his routines about *checks notes* garlic bread, rola cola and putting the big light on.
@MailOnline
Daily Mail Online
2 years
'Peter kay's comeback will have the wokerati sobbing into their Che Guevara T-shirts'
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
2 years
#LadBaby has donated £305k to Trussell Trust in 4 years. Just over 75 grand a year. Popular classic Xmas songs make up to £1 million a year in royalties. And his NUMBER ONE singles are raising 75k a year. Where's the rest of the money going Ladbaby?
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
2 years
Matt Healy after he's seen some ID
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
2 years
Cristiano Ronaldo has left Manchester United by mutual consent, which ironically is also the reason he's not allowed in America.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
5 months
King Charles diagnosed with cancer. Doctors said they hadn’t seen a growth on a royal that big since they caught Prince Andrew watching Mean Girls.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
2 months
Piers Morgan: did you send 41,000 emails? Fiona Harvey: no Piers: because if you did, it’s very easy to find them Fiona:
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
2 years
❤️
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
2 months
Now that Jurgen Klopp has finished his last game as Liverpool manager, let’s look back at the top 5 Premier League managers of all time. 1. Sir Alex Ferguson 2. Pep Guardiola 3. Jose Mourinho 4. Arsene Wenger 5. Claudio Ranieri
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
1 year
when Joey wore all Chandler's clothes
@adamrowecomedy
Adam Rowe
1 year
Edinburgh Fringe Festival Poster
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
10 months
BREAKING NEWS: Manchester United sign Russell Brand on season long loan
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
1 year
I have no idea what "up the ra" means but by god it's fun to shout it in this O'Neill's pub after 8 pints of Guinness
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
5 months
Kids outside freezing his arse off in the car park cause his dad fancied his chances of a half time blowie. Magic of the cup 🏆
@AstridWett
Astrid Wett
5 months
The power of social media. This guy gave me his son’s ticket. He saw my tweet and saved the day My faith in humanity has been restored💙
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
2 years
I support all the strikes this month. There's immense greed in this country but it sure as hell isn't coming from postmen and nurses and train staff. It's coming from tax-dodging multimillionaires who claim non-dom status to cling onto their vast wealth, isn't that right Rishi.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
2 years
Hilarious that the biggest comedy website in the UK has ignored that some lads from the north sold out a 10,000 seat arena off the back of a podcast and instead reported the death of an actress that was in Hi-De-Hi. Remember kids - if it happens north of Watford it doesn't count
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
2 months
The disdain middle class southern reviewers have for working class people is incredible.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
9 months
Not saying Fury Vs KSI fight was shameful, but even the Captain Tom Foundation is better value for money.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
1 year
Schofield family WhatsApp group right now
@BBCBreaking
BBC Breaking News
1 year
Timothy Schofield, brother of TV presenter Phillip, jailed for 12 years for sexually abusing boy
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
6 months
What a wonderful day to be doing two shows in Liverpool tonight
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
4 months
Strange because it wasn’t Islam that crashed the economy with an uncosted budget causing my mortgage to double, or let energy companies get away with profiteering, or pumped the rivers full of sewage or let the NHS fall apart. The biggest threat to my way of life is the
@PolitlcsUK
Politics UK
4 months
🚨 NEW: A poll reveals more than half of Tory members see Islam as a threat to the British way of life [ @guardian ]
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
1 year
Call me cynical but there's something about watching the brother of a nonce celebrating becoming a king without being democratically elected in a ceremony costing hundreds of millions at a time where people can't afford to eat or put the heating on that doesn't sit right with ne
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
2 years
Imagine thinking you're in the position to morally lecture anyone after you were caught hacking the phones of dead children.
@piersmorgan
Piers Morgan
2 years
This guy’s ego is out of control. He’s intent on wrecking everyone’s Christmas and millions will suffer.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
1 year
When Jeremy Vine uploads a new cycling video you have no idea how much I'm rooting for the oncoming vehicle
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
2 years
If you watch this with the sound off it looks like a documentary about young adults living with early onset dementia.
@hwgreenroompod
Hot Water's Green Room Podcast
2 years
What could’ve possibly scared Jamie this much? Find out exclusively on Patreon next week when the Bavaria special drops 🇩🇪🟢 🐝
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
2 years
Feel like I'm the only person in the UK that quite likes Prince Harry. The lad just wanted to take mushrooms and pills and shag older women but he was born into a family where you can only drink tea and eat scones all day. Was never gonna work was it.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
1 year
There's whole squads of specially trained police trying to find Nicola Bulley with no luck but Louise from Burnley is sat on twitter convinced she's solved the case cause the boyfriend gave her bad vibes and her neighbour's hairdresser had a similar dog that didn't like water.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
2 months
Let me tell you right now why this is the case, at least in comedy 1. When the industry talks about “diversity” - they mean BAME, non-male, and LGBT+ Things like class, age, geographical location, religion, political alignment do not get a look in whatsoever. We’re in an
@Channel4News
Channel 4 News
2 months
New research exclusively seen by Channel 4 News shows just 1 in 12 creatives working in TV and Film in England, Wales and Northern Ireland are from working class backgrounds. Actor Samira Ahmed says her experience of drama school made her realise "you need connections".
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
8 months
Great debut from Kobbie Mainoo, looks a real player. Enjoy him now cause we’ve probably got two years max of watching him play before he’s outed as a rapist.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
7 months
Why is this controversial? You don’t find it funny? Fine. Don’t watch it. Same with Gervais. Same with all other art, music and literature ever. The new world of social media algorithms is cultivating a generation of idiots who think something only has value if *they* like it.
@alexharmstrong
Alex Armstrong
7 months
Controversial opinion, Rosie Jones isn’t funny.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
1 year
Spending £600m on players to have them managed by Frank Lampard is like buying a top of the range Ferrari and letting Ant McPartlin drive.
@David_Ornstein
David Ornstein
1 year
🚨 Chelsea have reached agreement in principle to install Frank Lampard as interim head coach until end of season. 44yo #CFC legend to be joined by assistants Ashley Cole, Joe Edwards, Chris Jones. Process for permanent appointment continues @TheAthleticFC
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
1 year
He looks like a drink driving advert
@DeadMenTom
Dead Men Tom
1 year
Filmed something with @JamieHComedy this week and he seemed to really enjoy himself.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
1 year
My favourite bit of lockdown was when women started setting up their own sweet selling businesses charging about £47.50 for a pack of haribo tangfastics and a few wham bars in a box with a ribbon on it.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
1 year
Mad how people have bullied Alison Hammond into apologising for laughing at the idea of people getting kicked out for singing during The Bodyguard. Social media witch hunts are fucking mental.
@AlisonHammond
Alison Hammond
1 year
Statement : 🖤
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
1 year
Congratulations to Manchester City. Huge achievement winning the treble with only 115 breaches of financial fair play rules along the way.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
10 months
Nevermind banning XL Bully - I think most people shouldn't own most dogs. If you live in a terraced house you shouldn't be able to own a working collie/springer. If you've never owned a dog before you shouldn't just be able to go buy a rottweiler. There should be loads more rules
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
28 days
@Jaack I think it’s mental they’re having a go at him for being ginger when they’re the most ginger nation on earth
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
1 year
Hi @SkyNews - go and suck my fat nob. Comedians make jokes. Sometimes they fail. He's apologised for what he feels he needs to apologize for. That's it. Maybe instead do a segment on those politicians taking ten grand payments to be "consultants" for foreign businesses.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
2 years
#TheApprentice has changed so much. This week they're jetting off to Antigua to sell tourism packages. I miss the seasons where Lord Sugar would send them off round Romford market to sell all the shit in his loft.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
1 year
Started my new job today as head of ticketing at Norwich Playhouse. Just had some Scouse lad ringing up screaming about a tour not going on sale. Told him we'll do it in a few weeks when really I've just blocked his number lol
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
7 months
@curtiswoodhous8 Because once you put a joke online you have to write a new one. Whereas crowd work can be put online because it’s unique to the audience on the night so it can’t be reused anyway. He’s a great comic in his own right and does a new hour every year.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
2 years
Saying Ladbaby's single is the best way to donate to charity is like saying that giving Prince Andrew a handjob is the best way to protect teenage girls.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
9 days
@grantshapps Genuine question - how is destroying your posters “a clear attack on democracy” but spouting obvious lies such as claiming Starmer is a threat to national security because he spends Friday night with his kids fair game?
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
23 days
@fritztheyodeler Americans have no place whatsoever commenting about football.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
1 year
I wonder why so many witnesses withdrew from the trial of multi-millionaire Mason Greenwood.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
2 years
Parklife
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
2 years
Wales gonna be leaving this tournament with more Ls than one of their daft fucking towns
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
7 months
Don’t fall for this one lads. Ended up moving all her furniture
@KatieKoll
katie
7 months
I want my insides rearranged by a older fat man soooo bad 😔😭
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
1 year
Shit like this has got to stop. Alfie got called out on twitter, apologised for it, and whether people want to accept that is up to them. But combing through everything he's ever done, taking clear jokes out of context and threatening venues he's performing at? Nah. Not for me.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
4 months
@adambrown93 No Adam, it’s supposed to be a genuine suggestion.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
12 days
I would honestly sack Gareth Southgate tonight and bring in Graham Potter for the rest of the tournament. What’s the point of pissing away such a talented generation of players with a manager who clearly isn’t up to the task? Why wait until the tournament is over?
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
6 years
@hevans111 @MikeIona What are you on about? Nothing less hateful than just ignoring someone.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
6 months
The Epstein People who Flight Log watch darts 🤝 Only there for the 16 year old
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
23 days
@afcnur You cannot “play well” and still get beaten in the biggest upset in 40 years.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
6 months
I understand why Liverpool fans want Xabi Alonso (ex player, plays good football) but you can’t overlook what an incredibly risky appointment it is. The man’s entire senior managerial career is 64 games. And you want him taking on a massive club already? Huge gamble that.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
1 year
Hey @paddypower - instead of taking my joke and making it less funny, how about you get in touch and and I'll write better jokes for you instead.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
1 year
Spending £600m on players to have them managed by Frank Lampard is like buying a top of the range Ferrari and letting Ant McPartlin drive.
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@FreddyQuinne
Freddy Quinne
6 months
I’m telling you now, they’ll build Luke Littler up until he does the slightest thing wrong and he’ll get knocked down ten times as hard. If I was 16 with a hundred grand in my pocket I’d be the worst human being in the world, so just remember that when he inevitably slips up.
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