Elenimo Chembe Profile Banner
Elenimo Chembe Profile
Elenimo Chembe

@ElenimoC

1,341
Followers
1,376
Following
168
Media
12,387
Statuses

Lawyer | Writer | Book Reviewer | Philosopher | Historian | Educationist | Community Developer | CAF D Licensed Football Coach | Serial Debator

Joined May 2022
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
5 months
BEING BROKE IS BETTER THAN MAKING MONEY ILLEGALLY. Until our youth and graduates are sworn to this creed, plunder of public resources shall continue raving our nation.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
12 days
So, if a university fulfills the requirements necessary to offer legal studies, NCHE should decline accreditation because it is not a public university? Even Zinjanthropus with his primitive brain could have laughed at you. Shame! Throw away that stethoscope.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
12 days
Last time I checked. The number of practicing lawyers in Malawi was between 1000 and 2000. Imagine a country of 20M people being represented by 2000 people to access justice. Skyway College should follow the steps of BIU. The more the number of lawyers the cheaper they become.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
7 days
When ballership ⚽️ meets scholarship 📚 #lenifootballacademy #CommunityDevelopment #ChangeLives
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
22 days
Saturday and Sunday afternoons are for scholarship. We give a special focus on English and Mathematics. On these occasions I'm more than a coach, I'm a teacher. #CommunityDevelopment #ChangeLives
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
4 months
In 2017, while in my second-year 1st semester holiday I worked as a legal intern at Mhango & Co. Law Firm. When I received my monthly stipend I took a street kid, bought him some yummy food at Gallitos, bought him some clothes and I went home broke. I've always been a minimalist.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
1 month
When I discovered that a couple of STD5 ballers in my Academy couldn't read, I was shocked. I sought the services of an educator to help rectify this. I met Madam Banda. This woman has been our Academy's part-time teacher for a year. I went to pay homage and say goodbye.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
3 months
@Vanessa11462686 She's regretting a good decision.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
7 days
Mount Carmel Private School pledged to provide free education and accommodation. Our part was to provide school uniforms among other things. The uniform is pegged at K25000 and so far I've managed to buy 16 kids out of 22. If you can sponsor one child don't hesitate to reach out.
@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
7 days
When ballership ⚽️ meets scholarship 📚 #lenifootballacademy #CommunityDevelopment #ChangeLives
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
17 days
Some guy is in our office telling our secretary that MDF is very good at "nkhondo ya madzi". It has taken me supernatural effort not to intervene. Smh
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
11 days
The Revolution Will Be Televised. __Alexisophy
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
3 months
🚨 PARTNERSHIP ANNOUNCEMEN🚨 Leni Football Academy ⚽ is delighted to announce a partnership 🤝 with Mount Carmel Private Schools in Area 38, Kaphiri. The school has agreed to grant all our players fully-sponsored primary and secondary school education scholarships. 🎓
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
21 days
Just received another donation of K50000 from @legend_ispa Again, when strangers show such levels of support and love, the encouragement is huge. Blessings to you brother, be assured this will be put to good use. Cc @lbjoza
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
19 days
Ntchena vala usabanike 🔥🔥 #lenifootballacademy
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
1 month
Them: What if we don't make it? Me: Tachoka nkutali, mulungu anali ndi plan.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
4 months
After reading the cases of the State v Kumwembe & Others, I can assure you one thing. Ralph Kambara was an EVIL MAN. Cared less of his country and its poor citizens.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
6 days
Ana omwe angonga nyenyezi za mmwamba. __SDA Hymn number 7.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
12 days
What BIU has done is a laudable task. Being accredited means they have a bunch of full-time lecturers with Master's Degrees in Law. Sourcing such individuals from a small pool of available lawyers with Masters in Malawi is a formidable task. 👏
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
3 months
Another day to be reminded that modern relationships are attached to money. Long live the capitalist!
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
1 month
Schools that religiously practice the concept of weeding are lauded for producing the best students. I disagree. They are just good at separating the fast learners from the slow ones. They're lazy institutions. By seeking glory they trump upon education and sabotage learners.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
2 months
Momwe mudalitsa enawa, musayiwale ghetto, muyikumbuke ghetto. __ @SeanMorganMw
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
21 days
When a stranger who you barely talk to on Twitter sends you this kind of money for a project he just sees online, it gives me the strength to forge ahead. The only way to honor the generosity of people like @lbjoza is to stay true and determined. God bless @lbjoza
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
2 months
Coming from work the kids looked dapper. I had to take a pic but the picture quality was low - forgive the filter. Yours Truly, Community Developer.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
4 months
These people booing Chakwera I hope they do the same when he dies. Don't scatter roses when he's gone.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
2 months
@JoramMD Even this response stinks of showmanship. Lucky enough your prose is pitifully morbid. Colorless and unadorned. Poor choice of adjectives and adverbs. The sentence construction lacks subtlety. Don't be flippant, exercise dexterity, language is an art.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
2 months
The Interim Report of the aircraft of the late VP is so basic one would wonder why such a useless Report was kept under wraps.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
12 days
What should NCHE do when a private university has met the minimum requirements to offer legal studies?
@JeromeChisikwa
Jerome Chisikwa
12 days
NCHE has blood on its hands. How are they accrediting a shebeen university like BIU for the Bachelor of Laws (Hons)? Come on, let’s be serious. These guys enrol the worst of UNIMA rejects—people with 36, 38, 39 points, and the like. We are doing the legal industry an injustice!
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
4 months
A lot of folks here and in Malawi, regard politics as some sports league in which you have to pick sides and support it willy-nilly. This is the reason why Malawi is in shambles. You can't be telling me that you're MCP since birth. Pick the side with best leadership, silly!
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
5 months
Don't tell me to respect the dead when all you do on this platform is disrespect the living. Bully them, shame them and curse them. Virtue signaling double standards.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
27 days
One parent was so keen to see her kid join us at Mount Carmel. She pledged to contribute 75% of the expenses required. I obliged. We're changing lives here and to support us donate using the link below.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
1 month
Chakwera is one of the most disgraceful leader Africa has ever known. Some Russian scammers knew this when they brought the Bridgin Scam. It almost worked. What a useless president!
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
9 months
My dream to provide accommodation for my football academy kids has come to life. We rented a house in Falls Estate Area 1, Lilongwe, where we hope to provide a more conducive environment to nurture their talent.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
12 days
I am appalled at posts berating the accreditation of the BIU Law program. I can only condone such primitive thinking if it comes from that man with a stethoscope. I've always doubted his wits. NCHE rigorously vets programs before accreditation. Do they know? Smh
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
1 year
In conclusion, we condemn rape in the strongest terms. Rapists should be subjected to the harshest forms of punishment available. However, we also condemn those who draw hasty conclusions and want us to refrain from questioning the alleged victims. Women are capable of lying.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
2 months
4 legged baller Last Saturday Kenneth sustained a nasty fracture on his right leg. Yesterday I had to buy him an extra pair of legs until he heals. At least he's smiling 😃
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
4 months
These kids are age mates with significant differences in stature. In my subsequent posts, I'll share an in-depth analysis of how slow growth, genes, and malnutrition affect youth football development in Malawi and how I've attempted to solve the problem in my Academy.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
10 months
People out here praising Bushiri when we all know he's an accomplished con artist.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
5 months
The rich man gathered even more wealth for himself. He planned to spend it after retirement. Then death beckoned. What folly!
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
2 months
Our target is to raise K1,000,000 by 14 September. Below is what we've raised. K170,097. GiveChangu K101,200. K162,000. National Bank We have thus raised K433,297, with a deficit of K566,703. Donate using the link below
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
4 months
La Famille 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 Only at Leni Football Academy ⚽️ #communitydevelopment
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
12 days
In fact, when you score a single-digit on MSCE exams it means nothing. The doctor is a good case study.
@JoelFickson
J O E L
12 days
When you don’t do well in your MSCE, does that mean you are dumb ?
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
4 months
On 26 April 2012, President Joyce Banda appointed Kasambara as Minister of Justice and Attorney General. On 15 October 2013, he was replaced by Fahad Assani in the new cabinet after he was implicated in the attempted murder of Mphwiyo. A thread.
@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
4 months
After reading the cases of the State v Kumwembe & Others, I can assure you one thing. Ralph Kambara was an EVIL MAN. Cared less of his country and its poor citizens.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
3 months
My death doesn't worry me that much. I worry more about the death of a loved one. That thought fills my head with nightmares.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
3 months
Sometimes handwork doesn't payoff. Teach the young one facts. Stay real.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
8 months
Occasionally I get paid pocket change for writing assignments and dissertations for some "busy" college students. Once, a friend confronted me on whether such business did not betray my integrity as a thinker and intellectual. "I have to eat before I think", I responded.😂😂😂
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
3 months
My Academy kids are not orphans but were born in places where cursing is a virtue, violence is strength, education is part-time, and alcoholism and drugs are fashionable. They deserve a second chance of upbringing. Consider donating via the link below.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
1 year
This journalist invites Norman Chisale to an interview and asks him to tell Malawians the disadvantages of corruption. Is she serious? This guy is at the centre of unprecedented corruption allegations and that what's you ask? Well well well.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
4 months
I'm reading the judgement of the case of the State v Lutepo. I'll share some shocking quotes so that you appreciate the greed and the vice that is being perpetrated by civil servant and politicians. A thread.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
3 months
I'm creating a GiveChangu campaign, how many of you are donating?
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
1 year
Most of these folks praising Chibade and extolling him as a consummate lyricist would never listen to his songs in public, on a Bluetooth speaker for fear of being considered wachimidzi. INSANE.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
26 days
People who discourage the exchange of ideas under the pretext that they are too smart to engage are a pest to true intellectual development. They shouldn't drag their obese bellies in the corridors of knowledge. Go fast!
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
4 months
Mzungu: fada unayakatu Me: eh koma mumakwana katatu Our U13 lost 2-0 against @ascentsoccer below are the highlights.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
2 months
Did you know? Apart from looking after eighteen kids I also sponsor two age-based teams. Yes, these are two different tasks requiring different streams of funds. Support us using the link below.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
1 month
I have a friend who was weeded at college but he's now a successful businessman. He's ghetto-smart as they say. I'm sure if he were to put his ideas into a book they would be taught at college. Moral of the story? The streets succeeded in educating a man when PHD holders failed.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
14 days
I want to take this moment to wish a happy belated birthday to @JoramMD There are a few men on these streets with whom I can exchange pungent taunts without any a childish emotional rollercoaster. He's a true definition of a gentleman-cum-intellectual. Please stop boasting about
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
2 months
There's literally no linking up on LinkedIn. It's Instagram for the successful people.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
2 years
@apk1704 Being homophobic is the most noble service a man can offer to humanity. Don't be scared of buzz words. Long live homophobia!
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
5 months
Legacies are all about perspectives, here is my perspective. The VP made me believe that a better Malawi is impossible the moment I realised he had encounters with the vicious Sattar.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
12 days
With the way he's been thinking these days, I don't think he's mentally prepared for such a psychologically intense experience.
@CyphaLi265
Devidi Cypha 🇬🇧🇲🇼
12 days
@JoramMD and @ElenimoC , could I kindly arrange a boxing match for you two?
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
4 months
I have made substantial investments in nutrition at our academy. Daily meals include meat, soya, and margarine. By the end of this year, I want to build a custom gym. That is the only way to combat undergrowth.
@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
4 months
These kids are age mates with significant differences in stature. In my subsequent posts, I'll share an in-depth analysis of how slow growth, genes, and malnutrition affect youth football development in Malawi and how I've attempted to solve the problem in my Academy.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
2 months
Being Malawian and white is such a huge flex. #Throwback
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
20 days
I hope the Alexious Kamangila guy has enough evidence. This is monumental.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
4 months
I know a judge on the gay case judgment panel. So religious that there's no way he could affirm homosexuality. There's a legend that says he can take breaks mid-session, lock himself up in his office, and start praying in tongues for 10-15 minutes. The court resumes thereafter.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
2 months
The Chakaka guy wanted to enter the scared room of senior counsels through the back door. Insane!
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
4 months
Look at how this kid has grown. Check the difference from 2020 to 2024. He started playing at our academy at 11 years and now he's 15. How emotional! #lenifootballacademy
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
4 months
There is zero benefit in giving. If you give with the expectation of having something in return you're deluded. Giving is self-sacrifice not an investment.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
3 months
As I prepare to move my players from Falls, Area 1 to Mount Carmel Private School premises in Area 38, I want to raise at least 1 million Kwacha. Use the GiveChangu link below to donate a little something and help me change lives.
@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
3 months
I'm creating a GiveChangu campaign, how many of you are donating?
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
12 days
That man will soon start using his stethoscope as a belt. His thinking keeps deteriorating with every post. He should be watched closely otherwise we might lose a good man.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
2 months
My Community Development approach is a little complicated. Leveraging the power of football to mobilize and nurture kids means having two different tasks - I have to give the kids proper homecare and on the other, I have to sponsor several age-based teams. Tough!
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
4 months
After reading this booklist, be assured that you'll hate Kamuzu Banda. That's what happened to me.
@mcbrams
Jack McBrams
4 months
Presenting my curated list of 10 essential books every Malawian should read. These works should be compulsory in secondary education to combat ignorance and foster intellectual growth. Ensuring our youth are well-read is crucial for a knowledgeable and humble nation. 📚 #Malawi
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
4 months
Just me and my favorite coach, Thom Nkorongo.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
2 months
SDA Christu Mu Nyimbo Hymn #7 #ChangeLives
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
2 months
My team has the youngest squad in the National U16 League with an average age of 14. I set the standard - the torch bearer of football integrity. 80% of the teams in the league are ridiculously over-age. Well, support us by donating using the link below.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
6 months
Last Sunday, I sat down with the owner of Sanwecka Tech Companions, Rasheed Kasito. Sanwecka, a leading Vocational Training Programs institution will offer our ballers partial scholarships - a rare opportunity of alternative career pathways for our ballers in case football fails.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
4 months
When you post something on a public forum, you obviously want a public reaction. Why then are you like, don't post stupid responses on my tweets?
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
4 months
According to the court, anti-gay legislation is not discriminatory. Again, the anus is safe.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
2 months
There's a man who once reached out to me, cautioning me that I should tone down my criticism against the LGBTQ for fear of losing potential donors. I told him my soul was not for sale. Yesterday men feigning great wisdom tried the same antics - my response was similar
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
1 year
Now this is interesting. It raises novel questions and exposes hypocrisy. Is that indecent? Lately women have been claiming that such dressing is just okay.
@ChichiOkeke7
C.J.O
1 year
@KandyPure02 My question is why not posting a decent picture of her.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
17 days
This morning, Malawi U15 beat Namibia U15 6-0. Most of the kids are between 14 and 16, to be honest. But this is all a show. Even after they reach 18, no Super League coach will give them a chance. They have to wait until they're between 27 to 30 to have any chance. Shame!
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
4 months
We emerged champions in the @ascentsoccer U10 tournament. Another trophy 🏆 on the cabinet.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
4 months
I have seen that most of you are doubting Dr Michael Usi simply because he's a comedian. Little is known about his academic and leadership acumen. I looked through his CV and summarized it. A thread.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
5 months
Why isn't this story getting much attention? Are these not humans?
@Lexaz_Lexaz
🚫Do not disturb 🚫
5 months
Plus ngozi ya mu chiweta zosayendatu
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
5 months
The level of belief in these halfwitted conspiracy theories, makes me understand why old folks are burnt to ashes for being accused of witchcraft. This has to stop.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
1 year
The fact that Dr Banda died with billions of dollars in his foreign accounts should astound you. This was in the early 90s and this man had billions of dollars. FYI not kwachas but dollars, and by today's currency standards it would be close a a quarter trillion.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
2 months
@JeromeChisikwa He is as guilty as the rest of the political industrial complex.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
3 months
I called a friend and said, "asye pa ATM pali chi line nde I've no cash but I need to have lunch quickly, can you send me money I'll reimburse as soon as I have time for ATM lines?" He sent 10k. Poor man thought that as a lawyer I do 10k lunches. Bro, I do 1.5k lunch pa Lizuru.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
4 months
The more you give, the more broke you become. It's a simple economic fact. Don't quell my worries with your religious cliché, I signed up for this.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
1 year
Never be among those abominable brethren who claim that economic discussions are for economists or legal discussions are for lawyers. Read brother, read. You don't need that degree to be an intellectual.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
18 days
Good morning from Mount Carmel Private School premises. #lenifootballacademy
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
2 months
Under normal circumstances, a bag of maize should have been more valuable than a bag of gold but the questions of value are insanely complex.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
4 months
Rare footage of a sublimely worked out goal. Only at #lenifootballacademy
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
12 days
On a cold Wednesday, it's either we're flipping pages or flipping footballs. #lenifootballacademy #communitydevelopment
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
2 months
Smiley faces 😄 Donate to us using the following link if you want to see more smiling faces.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
24 days
Do you like Elon Musk's tweets?
@wane247
wane ❤️🇲🇼
24 days
Name something you should ask on a first date?
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
2 months
The goal is to quit law and become a full time Community Developer in the next six months. So, help me God. 🙏🙏
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
7 days
Watching the gender roles debate from the sidelines I couldn't help but notice how @PempheroMphande was flexing some high-level sentence constructions. Unadorned but sublime. Effortless and delicate. Those were aesthetically pleasing. The guy knows how to play with the alphabet.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
19 days
@JeromeChisikwa I once asked my former lecturer, who was a judge and is now a Supreme Court Justice, whether he felt like he had too much power. His answer was - "Of course, yes and you can be easily carried away with such powers."
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
6 months
We made sure all our U16 jerseys were personalized. A name for every baller. #lenifootballacademy
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
3 months
I never took the Low IQ banter seriously until I realized that there are indeed Malawians who'll vote for MCP, UTM or DPP. That is low IQ Promax.
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@ElenimoC
Elenimo Chembe
2 months
Someone who makes frequent posts of him boarding a plane with tasteless captions shouldn't be a doctor. Such gloating bespeaks of a man filled with ignorant showmanship. Showbiz was supposed to be the domain of baddies but our sorry doctor has no standards.
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