@buttjones420
Jones, great list my man. However, polos and vests at the bar will never be an out for me. It’s a subtle yet efficient way to signal to everyone in the bar that I’m rich or that I just came from the office. Either option I can talk down to anyone in the bar and feed my ego.
Dusty’s Polo Power Rankings:
1. Peter Millar
2. Johnnie-O
3. Southern Tide
Additionally, I would like to add my hot take that Cutter and Buck is by far the most over priced and worst polo on the market.
I’m draped in Peter Millar and Smathers and Branson. Going to wear my flip flops to the country club and drink 1 million Busch light peaches. Happy Saturday!
Wanted to share with y’all my new smathers purchase, the beverage cart belt. Best way to break the ice with the cart girl is to sew her means of transportation to your waist.
Happy Father’s Day!
The kids woke me up by jumping on the bed at 7:30am. Just did 5 lines in the master bathroom to stop the sweats and shakes. Locked and loaded to take my son to the batting cages. Can’t wait to see what apron or mug I get from the wife this year.
- Dust
This 4Runner and I were just slicing through traffic like a caffeinated 8 year old on fruit ninja. Gave him a nod and wave when he exited. Always respect the pace car.
@BockoCocko
I actually bring them in my Yeti Tundra 45 Hard Cooler. I’ll be buying transfusions and whiskey cokes on my dads tab. Thank you for your concern but I do not fuck with public courses Mike.
#BREAKINGNEWS
Fuck woj bombs. I’m dropping a dust bomb. Dalton Knecht confirmed going to the heat. Dalton said to the media today “I want to be like Tyler Herro. Ah ha ha it’s white boy summer.” Interesting pick from Miami. We’ll wait in the wings to see how it pans out.
Listening to my brother’s girlfriend talk about their sex life might be the worst thing that has gone into my ears since the time I had to watch a chick try and rap dreams and nightmares at the bar.
@richdaddycarter
I use mine simply just to post forward facing pictures of me in places others can’t afford to be. Just to announce that I’m better than everyone else and feed me self sustaining, ever growing ego.
Wanted to share my new business idea. A restaurant like hooters but it specifically only has side boob. I’m going to call it “Dusty’s” so you can tell the wife you’re going there and she won’t even realize you’re just peeping side boob and crushing Busch peach with the fellas!
@DuragRebel
I might be biased but switch NFL and MLB. The NFL playoffs peak at the conference championships, their first rounds aren’t as electric as the NHL and MLB in my opinion.
These Ivy League girls are super hot. Will they fuck with my Peter Millar and flip flops though? Might have to blend in and tie a sweater around my neck or some shit.
Calling shitty local dive bars to see if they’re doing the USMNT and debate double feature. Need to make sure I’ve got the right crowd with me for these events.
Play a couple hands on the online casino before going in person. Iron out the wrinkles and get warmed up for the night ahead. It’s just like grabbing a range bucket before playing 18. Could be the move.
@OliHendrixCBS
Oli,
That’s why it’s awesome because I can watch bullshit like canoe slalom and handball every four years. Also take a run at gold zone. Scott Hansen just flips you around to all the sports going on and doesn’t do the stupid puff pieces.
Hope this helps.
DB
I’m going to make my LinkedIn profile pic my mugshot. Show future employers that I can adapt and thrive under pressure. I think it would also highlight that I’m a personality hire and don’t actually bring anything of value to the table.
@mitchallman8008
Hey Mitch, I knew Orvis doesn’t carry PM. I completely agree that tiny duck shirts would be an Orvis thing though because of the brand’s stronger ties to hunting and fishing. Thanks for your advice! I’ll get back to you when my duck is dressed like a bama kid at NOLA formal.
No amount of side eyes will stop me from buying a bucket of fried chicken from a grocery store. I’m in at least $300 of golf attire and will kill this entire bucket on my own. I have no shame, I’m richer than you.
@CBSBrenton
“Hey, so I’ve been thinking.” And then never text her back. Another classic is sending a song called some like “feeling for you” and then saying “made me think of you.” And once again never text her back.
Dustin’s dusty donations (SEC Edition)
- Texas A&M -1.5
- Kentucky ML
- Italy -1.5 (Italian soccer is basically the SEC of Europe)
Parlay that bitch and have a day.
Just saw someone that got their last name tatted on their back. If you are not in the UFC, a professional boxer, ETC. it should illegal for you to do that. Baffling how uncreative and lame of a tattoo that is.
Nat geo got some shit called orca vs shark on. Fuck yeah, you know my drunk ass gonna sit here in my lawn chair and watch that. Gonna put it on mute and listen to treaty oak revival.