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Cursed Orthodox Nonsense

@CursedOrthodox

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Making fun of the orthodox, because nobody else will. DMs are always open to submissions.

Joined December 2022
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
4 months
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
1 year
It's been exactly 3 years since this legendary exchange
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Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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11 months
Really a puzzler, this one
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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1 year
(Do not do this)
@Kaleb__Atlanta
Patriarch Prime, PhD ☦️ 🇺🇲
@Kaleb__Atlanta
1 year
Please become Orthodox Christian. Please become Orthodox Christian. Please become Orthodox Christian. Please become Orthodox Christian. Please become Orthodox Christian. Please become Orthodox Christian Please become Orthodox Christian Please become Orthodox Christian
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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10 months
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8 months
"Thy Word is Truth."
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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2 months
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Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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2 years
When I’m in a historical revisionism contest and my opponent is Eastern Orthodox
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@Maximus_ROCOR
☦️ Maximus the Enforcer☦️
@Maximus_ROCOR
2 years
Was England Orthodox before 1066
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
2 years
EOs will look at this with and say with complete sincerity that this is what the Apostles had in mind
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Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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1 year
If you've paid attention to Eastern Orthodox discourse for any significant amount of time, you'll notice how they go on about how many converts are flocking to Orthodoxy, how America and Western Europe are all gonna become Orthodox. Let's look at what the data says
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
9 months
Meanwhile, St. Paul has no problem throwing around the word "saints" in his letters.
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@CursedOrthodox
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1 year
If you know, you know.
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@CursedOrthodox
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16 days
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1 year
In short: despite what EOs on the internet will tell you, in the real world: Eastern Orthodoxy is very fringe in the western world, and the majority of their numbers are made up of immigrants.
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@CursedOrthodox
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2 years
Lmao
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3 months
"The East has always been united unlike the West"
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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4 months
Many such cases. Sad to see.
@RCNonsense
cursed papist nonsense
@RCNonsense
4 months
The journey of an e-papist who only looked at whatever appeared trad, and not whatever was true
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@CursedOrthodox
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1 year
The Protestant understander has logged on
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Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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4 months
It is, in fact, over for the EO
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This is what happens when you base your theology on being "cool" or "edgy". Wouldn't be surprised if this became a trend among the more terminally online EOs.
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2 years
Eastern Orthodox will mock the Sistine Chapel for not being up to their aesthetic ideals when a good chunk of their icons look like this:
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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2 years
EOs will say they don’t worship Mary then claim she has more power in the soul of a sinner than Jesus.
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
1 year
As yes, because as we all know the 4th century Roman Empire had no significant heresies.
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@xingtemplars
Xing, PhD
@xingtemplars
1 year
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
1 year
On that subject, the majority of Eastern Orthodoxy in the west isn't from conversions, but immigrants. 2/3rds of Eastern Orthodox in the US are either immigrants or the children of immigrants, excluding grandchildren. In England, 96.9% of Eastern Orthodox are immigrants
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Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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1 year
What is it with the online orthodox and this type of content? I never see the methodists or the southern baptists or anybody else posting this stuff.
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2 years
It’s not directly related to Orthodoxy, but I found it too funny not to post
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2 years
I know posting Orthodox Meme Squad is cheating, but a friend requested I post it.
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Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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1 year
Posted as a submission.
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Mask off moment
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1 year
>181 likes
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@INDEEDHeIsRisen
buffalo 🚪 ☦️
@INDEEDHeIsRisen
1 year
Mormons have a much more logically consistent theological framework than any other Protestant(including papists) sect
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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4 months
This is sure to end well
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1 year
Studying Theosis was the wildest trip for me >the most pagan terminology you've ever seen in your life >looks inside >It's entire sanctification
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Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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1 year
First, let's acknowledge reality: Eastern Orthodoxy outside of Slavic lands is a statistical anomaly at best. There's about 800k in the United States (roughly 0.24% of the population at time of writing). In the UK, they have 250k members (0.37% of the population)
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2 years
Me getting flung into the firey pits because I stroked a cat and went “kitty, kitty, kitty” (this is apparently a violation of the divine commandments)
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
8 months
Go lift bro
@realcaliprepper
California Prepper ✝️☦️
@realcaliprepper
8 months
@KinoCineaste
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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2 years
EOs stop rewriting history challenge (impossible)
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1 year
>liberating West Virginia by turning it into a monastic theocracy governed by <1% of the population.
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
1 year
France has about 700,000 at most (roughly 1.03% of the French population). The highest percentage of Orthodoxy I found overall was in Italy, with 4.6% of the population being Orthodox. This, however, can be explained by the Romanian immigration into Italy, not conversions
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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2 years
Imagine centering your entire church around a monastery that only came into existence roughly 700 years after Christ’s resurrection.
@OrthodoxEthos
The Orthodox Ethos
@OrthodoxEthos
2 years
You can’t imagine Orthodoxy without Mount Athos. - With Father Peter Heers Want to learn more? Join our Q&A at , or sign up for our mailing list on ! 📩 #orthodox #orthodoxchristian #christianquotes #youthministry #christianity
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Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
1 year
Based Eastern Orthodoxy at it again.
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Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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4 months
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This is sure to end well
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1 year
Orthodox understanding of biology.
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Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
2 years
I’m starting to think some of these EO accounts are trolls. Would not surprise me. However, if he is genuine, this does reflect a larger trend of Eastern Orthodoxy slowly supplanting Roman Catholicism as the “based” religion, where all the “based” people go.
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
2 years
That 3 faced one got condemned in a Roman church council in 764 for being too ugly. Not even joking.
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Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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2 years
The teachings of an EO saint regarding pets, and overall respect to animals
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
9 months
Merry Christmas to all our followers. "He saved us, by the washing of regeneration, and renewing of the Holy Ghost; which he shed on us abundantly through Jesus Christ our Savior; that being justified by his grace, we should be made heirs according to the hope of eternal life."
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Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
1 year
Are you sure about that?
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@OrthoMemeSquad
Orthodox Meme Squad
@OrthoMemeSquad
1 year
I still think old Japanese culture would suit Orthodoxy very well
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
1 year
You literally call it "deification" and then explain "No, no, it's just entire sanctification, like what the Methodists do!" Just call it entire sanctification, and there would be no issue.
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
7 months
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Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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1 year
Plenty of the reactions to this tweet fit the bill for this account, but here's a few of the highlights.
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@NoWarChristian
Anti-War Christian
@NoWarChristian
1 year
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2 years
Thank you for your submission.
@Real_Rye_Bread
Solid Kvas🔥
@Real_Rye_Bread
2 years
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
1 year
"Scripture is meaningless without the Church!" Scripture would disagree with you. Notice how it doesn't say "All scripture under the church" or "all scripture under the right supervision".
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@VaclavzCech
Václav
@VaclavzCech
1 year
@TimothyDEasley @ForKingdomand @ifffster Well the Scriptures are just the Holy Tradition written down. Without the Church, they are meaningless. God bless.
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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2 years
Like bruh this isn’t even “veneration” this is straight up holding Mary has higher than Jesus.
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@CursedOrthodox
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2 years
To clarify, I'm not the same guy who used to run @orthononsense , I'm just doing the same schtick.
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Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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1 year
I got my first and third screenshots straight from the Antiochian Archdiocese of North America If you have a problem with my source, take it up with them.
@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
1 year
Studying Theosis was the wildest trip for me >the most pagan terminology you've ever seen in your life >looks inside >It's entire sanctification
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Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
1 year
This won't be the first time I talk about similarities between Mormons and EO. That thread on theosis is coming eventually.
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
3 months
Same guy as "God is Satan" btw
@PatrologyVotary
naD 🇬🇧🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿✝️
@PatrologyVotary
3 months
LOL. LMAO, even. At this point I don’t even need to say anything. What more is there to say about the mindset that produces this sort of thing?
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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2 years
I guess we’re gonna ignore the oriental orthodox, the Assyrian church of the east, the old believers, the three different Malankara orthodox churches, and all the other schisms that happened in Eastern Orthodoxy.
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2 years
If you know, you know
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1 year
"He is the propitiation for our sins, and not for ours only but also for the sins of the whole world."
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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1 year
This confirms what I and others have said in previous tweets. The only reason Eastern Orthodoxy has managed to resist so much of modern liberalism is due to lack of exposure. The moment it starts to set down roots in the liberal west (such as with the OCA) it turns into this.
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
2 years
On a side note: It’s always funny when Orthodox call Catholics papists. Gives off Uncle Ruckus vibes.
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2 years
Isn’t the whole point of Christianity that we DON’T all go to hell? That by faith in Jesus Christ, we go to Heaven? (Yes I’m aware this is old but it was submitted by a friend so I’m posting it)
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1 year
On a side note, Orthos using "papist" as an insult will never not be funny to me.
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1 year
For the record, I thought this was a fake quote at first, but it's real. He's a bishop in the Church of Cyprus, in communion with the rest of Eastern Orthodoxy. Still is, too.
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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Eastern Orthodox: bro you should totally begome orthodog we’ve got so many converts and our churches are growing so rapidly! Meanwhile, in the real world: 60% are immigrants or their children, total numbers shrinking, lying about total adherents.
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And for all the things you could attack the Catholic Church for, all the things you could point out, you go after the Sistine Chapel? That’s like attacking Mormons for the aesthetics of their temples.
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
1 year
Cernovich having a normal one.
@Cernovich
Cernovich
@Cernovich
1 year
Sola scriptura is fake and made up. None of the books omitted from the Bible are prohibited. That’s Martin Luther inspired nonsense. Catholics and Orthodox Christianity are only branches tracing directly to Christ. That’s not my opinion, it’s objective truth.
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The Orthodox Church of America published this. So much for "muh based Eastern Orthodoxy!"
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when enlightenment thinking started to erode Christian dogmas. Blaming the Protestant Reformation for liberalism is nonsense, especially when you see how non-Protestant churches in the west (Romans, OCA) fall to it as well.
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
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The Enlightenment started a century after the Reformation, and it was caused by scientific and literacy advancements triggering a wave of skepticism in established religious and political authorities. Orthos stop rewriting history challenge (impossible)
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Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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2 years
It used to be guys with🇻🇦 in their name making these kinds of takes. They’re still around, but slowly being supplanted by ☦️. Make of that what you will.
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
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Imagine unironically taking Andrew Tate’s endorsement lol. How desperate are you for support that a sex trafficker’s support is the best you can get?
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1 year
Found this comment in the replies. It's literally just my PFP if it were somehow a real person.
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Eastern Orthodox stop devaluing the Bible challenge (impossible)
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Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
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2 years
Many EO love to act like they’re somehow immune to western liberalizing trends but I assure you that’s simply not the case.
@Elpidophoros
Elpidophoros
@Elpidophoros
2 years
To our Jewish sisters and brothers, we offer our best wishes on the joyous occasion of #Hanukkah . May the miracle of the oil and the radiance of the Menorah inspire everyone to be filled with hope instead of despair, faith in place of doubt, and love to vanquish all darkness.
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Didn't know Saint Irenaeus of Smyrna was a Lutheran though.
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1 year
lmao
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@OrderStAndrew
Archons of the Ecumenical Patriarchate
@OrderStAndrew
1 year
His All-Holiness Ecumenical Patriarch Bartholomew: "Any attempt to challenge the Autocephaly of the Church of Ukraine undermines inter-Orthodox peace and hinders cooperation and common witness of the Orthodox Churches."
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2 years
Go onto Google images and search “church history chart” and this is the first result lol
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2 years
The Calvinism understander has logged on
@Zobooblues
ZobooBlues☦
@Zobooblues
2 years
@Geloofsekerheid @CursedOrthodox Does your god want me to repent?
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@CursedOrthodox
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1 year
Case in point:
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
1 year
when enlightenment thinking started to erode Christian dogmas. Blaming the Protestant Reformation for liberalism is nonsense, especially when you see how non-Protestant churches in the west (Romans, OCA) fall to it as well.
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
1 year
Interesting to see where this goes.
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@Orthodoxy2019
Orthodox Christianity
@Orthodoxy2019
1 year
Female altar servers and readers proposed in Greek Archdiocese “The Archbishop explained that the dominant problem is the false notion that only men are allowed within the sanctuary,” the document reads.
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
1 year
From The Confession of Dositheus, produced by the Synod of Jerusalem in 1672.
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
1 year
For those unaware, the meme is both a parody of this one, and a reference to Jonas King, who did go to Greece to preach the gospel, and was harassed by Greek authorities. The other guy in the photo is Germanus IV, who was one patriarch of Constantinople in 1845, the year when
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
2 years
I speak no hyperbole when I say there’s more love and unity between the “thousands” of Protestant churches then there is in Eastern Orthodoxy
@rafofappalachia
Rafael
@rafofappalachia
2 years
@CursedOrthodox Now do the thousands of Protestant “churches” 😂
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
2 years
EOs mad that I’m not publishing detailed reports on every aspect of their religion, when making jokes at their expense takes far less effort and gets them equally riled up.
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
1 year
I always found it funny how the Orthodox online act like their church is the last true bastion of Christianity, standing against "heresy", and then their patriarchs are out doing photoshoots with Muslims.
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
2 years
“Calvinism is when you believe God hates people” -John Calvin probably
@unifiedprolife
Northodox
@unifiedprolife
2 years
@IliaOrthodox It's truly ugly theology
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
1 year
I've seen plenty of EO make this claim in the past, but I'm gonna use this one to clarify my point: The Protestant Reformation happened around the 1500s, to dispute corruption and doctrinal errors of the Roman Church. Liberal influence in the church dates back to at most 1770 [1]
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@CursedOrthodox
Cursed Orthodox Nonsense
@CursedOrthodox
2 years
While I thank you for your submissions to this account, I’d like to remind you all to keep submissions to my DMs. Also remember to clarify if you want a shoutout, or if you wish to remain anonymous. Thank you!
@Zobooblues
ZobooBlues☦
@Zobooblues
2 years
@CursedOrthodox You literally believe Christianity didn't exist until your gut came along. Like a Muslim, the true faith immediately went extinct.
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