Dan Hernandez Profile Banner
Dan Hernandez Profile
Dan Hernandez

@CubanMissileDH

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Screenwriter: TMNT: MUTANT MAYHEM, POKÉMON DETECTIVE PIKACHU, ADDAMS FAMILY 2. Showrunner: LEGO STAR WARS: REBUILD THE GALAXY, KOALA MAN

Los Angeles
Joined March 2009
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
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@CubanMissileDH
Dan Hernandez
2 months
The Dan speaks! There’s been a great disturbance in the Force. For the last few years, @BenjiSamit and I have been putting the pieces together in a galaxy far, far away. LEGO Star Wars: Rebuild the Galaxy is a love letter to all things Star Wars and LEGO, made by true fans.
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Dan Hernandez
5 years
Today is the opening of #DetectivePikachu This is the first movie @BenjiSamit and I have had produced, and we are extremely proud of how it turned out. For an hour and forty minutes, we want everyone to feel like Pokémon are real. We think you will.
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
I think the new version of Love Story by @taylorswift13 may in fact be better than the original! Off brand tweet? No! Taylor’s absolute refusal to be taken advantage of as an artist is completely inspirational to me! #TaylorsVersion
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
This is why we wrote the movie. For people like this hero!
@JackieVira
Simple Cannabutter on Toast
3 years
I went to see the Addams family 2 and the guy in front of me is eating a whole sweet potato pie 😭😭
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
You think Freddy Krueger ever jumped into the dreams of an extremely horny teen and was like, "Whoa, whoa, no thanks."
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Dan Hernandez
4 years
@dave_schilling I know a lot of people have said Henry Winkler, but it is true. I worked with him. He introduced himself to every single actor, including the extras, with something like, "Hello, I'm Henry, and I'm excited to work with you today." He also brought home-baked cookies.
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
At my first job, the boss made me do a riddle to assess my intellect. He told me the riddle wrong, making it impossible to solve but still treated me like a moron. Totally degrading! Anyhoo, I’m off to run my tv show and that company is out of business. Hang in there, my friends!
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Dan Hernandez
2 years
For those who have never experienced being on a show that gets canceled, it is basically like dismantling a small village full of people who care about each other, people who will never all be together again. Definitely thinking of everyone who lost their jobs today. Onward!
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Dan Hernandez
2 years
When I hire people for TV rooms, I am shocked to find the question that tripped most people up the most was “what are your passions and esoteric interests outside of writing?” The show is shaped by such passions! Things I know nothing about are gold! Nerd out in these interviews.
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
Musical theatre geeks ONLY: What is a line from a musical that has insinuated itself on your life? For me, it is Sweeney Todd grudgingly singing “anything you say, anything you saaaaaay” in “By the Sea” as my go-to phrase for when I have to do something but don’t want to.
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Dan Hernandez
10 months
A few months ago, I had a bad physical. Prediabetes, high cholesterol, etc. I got scared I was not going to be around for my kids. Since then, I have lost 70 pounds and my numbers are good! Hardest thing I have ever done, but hopefully you are all stuck with me a bit longer!
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Dan Hernandez
4 years
I told you to watch this space, and here is why! Nothing work related but something even better. Twitter friends, meet Saul Rodrigo Hernandez aka Hot Rod aka Rowdy Roddy Hernandez! Saul, being born on Friday 13th, is already interested in the outré and the occult. Proud!
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Dan Hernandez
4 years
Twitter Pre-2016: Shaq and Ashton Kutcher tweeted back at me! Twitter Post-2016: Some guy called Bobaphat69 does NOT like the early voting trends in North Carolina. I’m freaking out.
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Dan Hernandez
11 months
I am not part of the WGA negotiating committee, but if you put me in there with the AMPTP, lock the door, and let me explain in extreme detail with textual evidence my theory that Stairway to Heaven is about Galadriel from Lord of the Rings, this will all be over tomorrow.
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
It is my first day as co-showrunner. It’s hard to believe. Sometimes the most profound pleasure is setting a goal and not stopping until it is done. No matter where you are in your journey, find the moments that light the way and give you hope of arriving where you want to be.
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
America's safe word was "Biden."
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Dan Hernandez
2 years
My hottest take is that I feel almost religious certainty that Avatar 2 is going to kick ass and James Cameron is going to prove everyone wrong again.
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Dan Hernandez
2 years
I once worked with an actor who told all the writers after a table read, “I am an international superstar. Every joke you write for me has to be gold, and you are all writing me shit.” Then all the pens and pencils were put under lock and key, as punishment.
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
OnlyFans but it's just me telling people who's an asshole in Hollywood and who's cool.
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
It’s 2022 which means many are turning their minds toward getting a job. So here’s another TV STAFFING THREAD! Some find these writing threads tedious, but as my friends can tell you, I have no problem being tedious. Today’s 🧵 : THE CUBAN MISSILE’S GUIDE TO SHOWRUNNER MEETINGS
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Dan Hernandez
1 year
It’s Hail Mary time. @pizzahut I am one of the writers of TMNT: Mutant Mayhem. Is there any way I can get one of these shirts? I will only eat Pizza Hut from now on. Every meal. I was participant in the Book It! program, so my history with your fine company goes back many years.
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Dan Hernandez
1 year
You never know who is going to turn up on the WGA picket line! The legendary @GineokwKoenig !!!!! Star Trek’s Pavel Chekov!! Babylon 5’s Alfred Bester!! My life is made! #WGAstrong #WGAsolidarity
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
THE CUBAN MISSILE’S PRACTICAL GUIDE TO TV STAFFING: Recently I’ve been fortunate enough to have two shows picked up to series. As a result, I’ve been reading tons of scripts to staff said shows. There is an aura of mystery around this topic, and I would like to be candid + open.
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
The final stage of comedy writing is hating both comedy and writing.
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
I don’t know much, but I do know if you want to stay married, pick one of your spouse’s enemies at work and get three times as angry as your partner whenever that person pulls some shit.
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Dan Hernandez
5 years
Whatever happens with @OneDayAtATime getting renewed or canceled, at least there are dozens of other shows starring, created, and written by Latinos that authentically represent our community’s experience, while still addressing universal topics everyone can enjoy. Oh wait. Damn.
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Dan Hernandez
6 years
Totally effective while at the same time beautiful!
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Dan Hernandez
4 years
I know there is a lot of division tonight. I hate to wade in. But it is indisputable that in Starship Troopers Dizzy Flores is hotter and more fun than Carmen Ibanez, and Johnny Rico truly fucks that situation up.
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Dan Hernandez
10 months
This is so demonstrably untrue, it's stunning. The WGA issued a counter to the AMPTP's offer weeks ago. If you talk to anyone with knowledge of this situation, on either side of negotiation, the truth is plain. This headline is meant to create fear, and it simply will not work.
@THR
The Hollywood Reporter
10 months
Negotiations have been at a standstill as both the WGA and AMPTP believe it’s the other’s turn to make a counteroffer
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
Tomorrow my second movie comes out. I have two shows in production. 10 years ago, I had so little going on I cried when the Heat lost to the Mavs in the finals because it felt like my hometown Heat losing was a referendum on my life. Keep going, even if you take the L sometimes.
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
If none of you cowards will say it, I will. I like the Ewoks.
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@CubanMissileDH
Dan Hernandez
2 years
Avatar: The Way of Water was one of the most unbelievable movie experiences I've ever had. I never abandoned the Avatar hype train, and I am proud of myself this day. James Cameron operates at a level higher than anyone else. The whole movie was him shouting, "YOU DARE DOUBT ME?"
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Dan Hernandez
2 years
Screenwriting 🧵: THE CUBAN MISSILE’S GUIDE TO BEING A GREAT TV STAFF WRITER. In an attempt not to do the work I am actually paid to do, here are my thoughts on what makes a great staff writer. Subjective as always but hopefully filled with something approximating wisdom.
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Dan Hernandez
2 years
I love The Gilded Age because the stakes are so low. “Nathan Lane is coming to dinner and it must be a success!!!!” Three episode arc.
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
No one asked me, but this is the direction I would take The Avengers and the MCU.
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Dan Hernandez
2 years
Wordle man gave us comfort and fun for a few precious weeks, and now he got paid and must rest. This is the way.
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Dan Hernandez
2 years
@davidaxelrod I think the parents literally begging to enter the school and save the children would disagree, you ghoul.
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
I’m 100% for adopting the proposed WGA “Additional Literary Material” credit. It’s absurd writers can contribute to a movie and receive NO CREDIT. There are big movies I’ve worked on I would love people to know about, not as ego, but as a track record that yields more work!
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Dan Hernandez
2 years
What if Twitter DID die last night and we are all Bruce Willis in The Sixth Sense right now???
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
I once met with a literary agent who told me my work was “too sci-fi, too fantasy.” The exact things he identified as problems were, in my mind, my greatest strengths. We did not work together! All kinds of people will offer opinions on how you “should” write. Don’t listen.
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Dan Hernandez
2 years
I aspire to be “Jeopardy hot” no more no less.
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Dan Hernandez
11 months
All I can say is that 99% of the showrunners I know are in support of this proposal, including me. I am not going to demonize writers against it, but I think this is a classic Mr. Spock “good of the many vs. good of the one” situation.
@Variety
Variety
11 months
The WGA proposed that TV shows should hire a minimum of six to 12 writers, but some writers disagree. “Nobody asked for this,” said one prominent showrunner. “Every showrunner I know is against this. It doesn’t make sense to anybody.”
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Dan Hernandez
4 years
“I want Taco Bell, but I also want to live.” is weirdly a thought I had long before this covid situation.
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Dan Hernandez
1 year
Indiana Jones & The Dial of Destiny fucking kicked ass. Only enemies of fun would dislike it.
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Dan Hernandez
5 years
Matrix 2020 is going to be about all the humans plugging back in because shit out in the real world sucks too hard.
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Dan Hernandez
4 years
I talked to the other Cuban-Americans, and we are giving special dispensation to dunk on Marco Rubio and Ted Cruz in perpetuity until one of them shows medical evidence of a spine.
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
Many months ago, I somewhat flippantly bribed the twitter-verse for followers by saying I would reveal my worst celebrity encounter, which happened to be with a beloved childhood hero, at 10,000 followers. That goal seemed years away at the time. But here we are. It happened.
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Dan Hernandez
1 year
People think writers and actors are soft. And we ARE attention-seeking validation magnets. But pursuing a career in the arts is also brave, foolhardy, and kinda batshit. We have all withstood incredible pain to get here, and we can take much more. #SAGAFTRA #WGA #Solidarity
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
There is only one piece of screenwriting advice you will ever need. Does your script contain three elderly women (and one’s even older mother) living together, sharing laughter and hard-won wisdom in their twilight years? If not, ask yourself why. I call it “The Golden Rule.”
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Dan Hernandez
5 years
It is November and you know what that means: it is the month we celebrate this guy who makes a conscious choice to jump through Axl Rose’s wedding cake in the November Rain video when he clearly does not have to.
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
It’s the time of year I am reminded that Grover is canonically Jewish and his mom looks like Barbra Streisand.
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
Here’s the deal: if you didn’t buy your video games by taking a slip of paper to the special area at Toys “R” Us, we can never fully connect.
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Dan Hernandez
5 years
So our show @OneDayAtATime got canceled after three season. But don’t be sad! Just consider how many classic things only lasted three seasons: Star Trek, Gilligan’s Island, and my parent’s marriage. #ODAAT #OneDayAtATime
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
Our show Ultra Violet & Blue Demon has been ordered to series at Disney Channel! The idea of Mexican/Latino superheroes for every kid in the world to see nearly moves me to tears. @BenjiSamit and I are ready to leap off the top rope!
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
For Hispanic Heritage month, I want to point out that writers from our community are interested in writing all kinds of stories across all genres. Sci-fi, horror, romance, fantasy, animation, everything. I hope the industry can expand the idea of what a “Hispanic” writer is.
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
I am only in part 1, but #SnyderCutJusticeLeague is already an incredible improvement. What an absolutely fascinating gift we’ve been given to study. The Snyder Cut is real!
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
One of my triggers is a group text with one unknown number. I'm like WHO IS THAT? WHO THE FUCK IS THAT?
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Dan Hernandez
10 months
So many times I have received a “best and final” offer that ultimately was neither best nor final. It is a meaningless phrase when someone wants something, and in this case, MUST HAVE something from you. We keep going until the deal is right.
@Variety
Variety
10 months
AMPTP Gives WGA Its Best and Final Offer, Guild Expected to Respond Sunday
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
Your moms are all great, but please acknowledge the 80s hotness of my mom and her band. That guy with the beard who looks like a better looking version of me is my dad!
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Dan Hernandez
4 years
@Marina_Sirtis These kind of responses are bewildering to me. Star Trek is one of the most political shows of all time. It has given generations of people an ethical framework to strive toward, and as I get older, I appreciate it all the more.
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Dan Hernandez
4 years
What’s your favorite single image or cover from any comic book? My favorite is this masterpiece by @thealexrossart from Marvels written by the master @KurtBusiek . To me, this image encapsulates everything special about the X-Men. I don’t think there is a lovelier image in comics.
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Dan Hernandez
4 years
I know it is Trump’s birthday, but let’s all wish a happy first birthday to someone far more qualified to be president, my daughter, Goldie!
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Dan Hernandez
4 years
The most sacred part of Thanksgiving is your mom giving the blow-by-blow explanation of why each dish did not turn out as good as she wanted it to be.
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
It’s an April Fools’ Day joke but...should it be???
@joshgad
Josh Gad
3 years
Perfect day to finally announce that I'm starring in "The Penguin" origin story!
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Dan Hernandez
2 years
If I am good and hit my writing goals for the day I get to watch an hour of television and if I don’t hit them I get to watch six.
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Dan Hernandez
11 months
Small career advice 🧵 for writers: After writing on three sitcoms, industry people didn’t really get it when we said we wanted to write big genre movies. We realized it was up to US to change the town’s perception of what we were capable of writing. 1/
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Dan Hernandez
5 years
I’m from Florida, so this Los Angeles thunderstorm makes me want to wrestle an alligator and fuck up an election.
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Dan Hernandez
5 years
@maggieNYT This is disingenuous to the point of intentional absurdity. Your absolute insistence that you bear no personal responsibility for shaping the narrative while opining and...ya know...shaping the narrative insults the intelligence.
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
If you are in the tv/film business, maybe take a quick second before speculating publicly about how bad/poorly received new shows/movies are going to be before they even come out. You may be right! But you may be dead wrong. Either way, it’s public and people remember! Bye!
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
My point in telling these stories is that ultimately positivity is a more powerful force than gossipy bullshit. I sat down to write the bad experience, and then I thought to myself, “why put this into the world?” Everyone has a bad day: you, me, or even a nameless mega-celebrity.
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Dan Hernandez
1 year
Part 2 in the never know who is going to show up department: @tmorello !! The Nightwatchman himself is helping us rage against the machine. Tom is not only the real deal when it comes to the rights of workers, he is also my friend. #WGAstrong #WGAsolidarity
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Dan Hernandez
5 years
Never do I see the argument that superhero content is popular because the world is so unstable and we want to believe in a higher, positive power, in much the same way the world was in the 30’s-40’s when superheros became popular. Not everyone who likes this stuff is a dumb baby.
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Dan Hernandez
5 years
Hey. I am a dad on Father’s Day. Now I can do Dad-ly things like sign my tweets. -Dad
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Dan Hernandez
4 years
At exactly 10K followers, I will reveal which people in Hollywood are nice and which people SUCK, including people you think are nice but actually suck. Follow accordingly!!!
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Dan Hernandez
2 years
I don't outline. I don't even write scripts. I recite the story and dialogue from memory like the great bards of old and someone does their best to write it down before I finish. I guess that's why people don't like working with me?
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Dan Hernandez
1 year
I am thrilled to publicly announce that @BenjiSamit and I co-wrote TMNT: Mutant Mayhem along with incredibly talented @Sethrogen , @evandgoldberg , @Roweyourboatz and @BrendanOBrien77 !! We were raised on Ninja Turtles, and this is quite literally a dream come true. Turtle power!!!
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
Hey comic book nerds, show me the best four prizes from your collection. Beat this!! #comics
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
Robin f’n Williams came up to me shouting, “Dan! What a great joke!” Then he asked me for my permission (!) to alter it slightly. Of course, Robin! In the moment, I could feel my soul leaving my body from disbelief and joy. Even now, it hardly seems real.
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Dan Hernandez
10 months
This might be my last rodeo as a WGA Strike Captain, but I am SO proud of the work we did. I’m in awe of my fellow captains, the lot coordinators, WGA staff, leadership, and our negotiating committee. Future generations may not know our names, but they will know our legacy. #WGA
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
One of the things I miss about being a teenager is seeing bad movies in theaters because what the fuck else are we going to do tonight?
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Dan Hernandez
2 years
The most talented actors, writers, directors, musicians and visual artists I knew in college, nearly without exception, do not create art professionally. You don't have to be the best to ever do it. You do need to be determined enough to Shawshank crawl your way to victory.
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Dan Hernandez
4 years
It's Hispanic Heritage Month! Here is my wish: more Latino TV/movie executives making decisions about Latino-centric content. I'm pretty tired of hearing things aren't "relatable." Guess what?! Putting our lived experiences on screen will make them relatable to everyone! Duh!
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Dan Hernandez
1 year
Do you like my new not working outfit? Let’s fucking go. #WGAstrong #WGAsolidarity
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
Once I had a meeting on a show for the diversity spot. The showrunners said, “We didn’t read your script, but we did print it out.” I retorted, “I guess that’s a good start. Next time try reading it.” We didn’t get the job. In honor of Hispanic Heritage month, I regret nothing!
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Dan Hernandez
8 years
What is rape culture? This tweet! What is the patriarchy? This tweet! Who's a living pile of belching shit? Brit Hume! Author of this tweet!
@brithume
Brit Hume
8 years
Woman who has sex on camera for $ says Trump propositioned her. "This is not acceptable behavior." Please.
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Dan Hernandez
6 months
Taken 1 year apart. Dare I say new year, new me?? I dare.
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Dan Hernandez
6 years
To change things up, Ronan Farrow should write an article about what went wrong with the new Predator movie.
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Dan Hernandez
4 years
I was a Florida state chess champion once upon a time, and let me tell you, chess is not as horny as Queen’s Gambit is making you all believe.
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Dan Hernandez
3 years
P.S. Robin’s choreography demonstration in The Birdcage is probably my favorite physical comedy bit of all-time. What a hero.
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Dan Hernandez
4 years
Today, I will be leading my first network table read as a creator. It has taken a long time to get here. Just keep learning and believing in the stories you want to tell. With Crom on our side, we’ll all get where we’re going. And if Crom won’t help, to hell with him.
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Dan Hernandez
2 months
Hey, I lost 100 pounds. Unfortunately, I did have to shed my old friend group so apologies to Wendy, Ronald, Carl (‘s Jr.), and the Burger King.
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Dan Hernandez
2 years
So @BenjiSamit and I were just minding our business, when suddenly the dragon gets out of the bag...
@DEADLINE
Deadline Hollywood
2 years
EXCLUSIVE: A Disney film is in the works featuring the character Figment. The feature hails from Seth Rogen’s Point Grey with 'Pokémon Detective Pikachu's Dan Hernandez & Benji Samit set to write
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Dan Hernandez
26 days
I guess the Mawg is out of the bag! @joshgad @BenjiSamit Josh Greenbaum, and I have gone to ludicrous speed! Getting the opportunity to work with our writing hero @MelBrooks is quite literally a dream come true.
@Variety
Variety
26 days
A “Spaceballs” sequel is in development at Amazon MGM Studios. Josh Gad is attached to star, as well as produce alongside Mel Brooks.⁠ ⁠ Josh Greenbaum will direct the film from a screenplay by Benji Samit, Dan Hernandez and Gad. Kevin Salter will executive produce. ⁠ Get the
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Dan Hernandez
4 years
Maybe this will bring you as much joy as she brings me. Exactly ten months ago I caught myself a wild pikachu!!
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Dan Hernandez
2 years
One thing I do after a script dies is I migrate over my favorite characters to new scripts. It is a tiny way to feel like your work was not in vain and some part survives to fight another day! I have had a nerdy character called Spec traveling between scripts for 15 years!
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Dan Hernandez
2 years
The idea of going out on a Friday night now seems mythological to me.
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Dan Hernandez
5 years
I am going to take the fact @HamillHimself liked my Father’s Day tweet about my new daughter as a blessing from the light side of the force. A luminous being is she. Thanks, Mark!
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Dan Hernandez
4 years
My Cuban blood started boiling a few minutes ago, and I could not understand why. But now I see there was a great disturbance in the Latino force.
@IvankaTrump
Ivanka Trump
4 years
If it’s Goya, it has to be good. Si es Goya, tiene que ser bueno.
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@CubanMissileDH
Dan Hernandez
2 years
@JennyENicholson We’re gonna do our best
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@CubanMissileDH
Dan Hernandez
3 years
I’m back into the #SnyderCut of Justice League, and I am still stunned by how much great stuff was removed. The theatrical cut ripped out the soul of this movie, particularly in setting up the characters and why we care about them! Could this be one of the great comic book films?
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@CubanMissileDH
Dan Hernandez
4 years
@JBennet I'll fix for you. "Hi, I'm here to weasel out of our confounding decision to print something as obviously dangerous as Cotton's Op-Ed. I will dress up my intellectually dishonest argument by pretending I'm just 'letting the reader decide' and not normalizing calls for fascism."
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