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Alex Freund Profile
Alex Freund

@AMFreund

3,000
Followers
732
Following
806
Media
9,699
Statuses

Writer @lovevictorhulu / @Reductress / texts to my friends

Los Angeles, CA
Joined March 2009
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
6 years
Idc if you are “gay” or “straight” or “my mom” if you like my tweet you’re flirting w me.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
4 years
I’ll never forget about the time I brought M*ndy K*ling her lunch and 15 seconds later she tweeted about how only getting one napkin with your lunch was insane
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
It’s so sad when I see people from my high school who are friends with all the same people as they were 12 years ago. I, for instance, have no friends now, which is better.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
submissive in bed but dom about deciding what to eat 😍😍😍
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
4 years
@morganzetajones Yes in all honesty I agree with her
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
4 years
@drewbcarr I was too scared to go back bestie. I was too scared to go back.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
I don’t have Grindr except when I need to check if my hot waiter is gay.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
I hope I get reincarnated as a 5’9” bottom. Y’all are having so much fun.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
2 years
I’m so thankful to be gay bc of my chosen family and bc I know in my soul that I am too lazy to make a woman cum
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
4 years
To be clear, this isn’t shade. I thought it was hilarious and I think Mindy is very kind, funny and talented and I will bring so many napkins if she let’s me meet on Never Have I Ever
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
Watch #LoveVictorS2 streaming on Hulu and don’t forget to look out for my cameo as “DL Masc Guy On Unspecified Gay Dating App”
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
6 years
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
Get your PrEP for FREE From the bottle in my bathroom that I’m not using bc I’m not sexually active rn.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
5 years
@ellievhall @LouisPeitzman “I love Joffrey with all my heart your grace. He is a just and fair king.”
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
2 years
All bathrooms should be gender neutral and then we’ll split them up by whether you have explosive diarrhea or not
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
4 years
If the point of lexapro is to make you less generally depressed about the hopelessness of life and more specifically depressed about the fact that you can’t cum then damn this shit is gooooooood
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
5 years
@NickStopTalking Okay you didn’t need to come for the pasta community like this
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
4 years
Just kissed a guy goodbye and got into an Uber where the driver is wearing a blue lives matter hat. This will be my last tweet. Please make it go posthumously viral!
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
I’m vers. I can be anxious and avoidant.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
8 years
Hillary Clinton is Paris Gellar and America is full of people whose favorite character is DEAN
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
5 months
This is how I expected the entire gay community to treat me after I staffed.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
Euphoria really put its whole pussy into showing us more dicks
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
6 months
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
5 years
@rachel_handler Say, “Trump is president. It’s the Wild West out here. Etiquette is dead.”
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
4 years
@mattduckor Back-pay for Sohla please!
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
My claim to fame is that the creator of Grindr hit me up on the app and when I sent him my pics he immediately blocked me.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
2 years
Putting your boyfriend on the grid is more serious than marriage
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
2 years
Bottoms shouldn’t have to Postmates. Their tops should be cooking for them.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
4 years
Do any masc gays want to be friends with my dad?
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
4 years
Just because I am “cripplingly lonely” doesn’t mean I want to “talk to anyone”
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
I am calling out Sex Lives of College Girls for introducing the idea of “chuckle fuckers.” Being funny has never once gotten me laid and it’s dangerous to spread this kind of misinformation.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
Did it!
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
4 years
I wish Biden followed me so I could be like, “oomf just authorized a drone strike,” or “oomf is negotiating down the stimulus bill against himself”
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
2 years
We need new queer stories. Like a gay kid who comes out, but he kicks his parents out of the home bc they don’t fit into his new aesthetic.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
I am looking to make new gay friends. Preferably we will have a will they won’t they vibe until you get a bf who I will leave out of inside jokes. Thank you.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
Scarf? My ex has my PS3! I’m writing All Too Well a 20 min version!
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
My Dad died in a boating accident in 1992. His body was never recovered and we’re still looking for his remains to this day. If you have any information on the whereabouts of his bones, please contact me. I like your crop top ❤️
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
4 years
You didn’t forget how to talk to people in the pandemic. You’re 30 and no one has ever liked you. (I’m talking to myself)
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
1 year
Writers need fair pay or their boyfriends will dump them!!! #WGAStrike @jakeylindner
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
1 year
I think it would be really helpful if auteur Showrunners like Mike White and Sam Levinson would speak publically about the writer mandate instead of letting their shows be used as talking points to undermine an absolutely crucial piece of the WGA's demands.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
Pokémon primed us to collect Tinder matches and let them sit untouched in our PCs
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
7 years
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
7 years
@realDonaldTrump It is so humiliating to watch you exist
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
I got micro-agressed when my nurse asked me if I had met any nice girls in LA. And as a 30 y/o proud gay man living in West Hollywood I took a stand and said, “no, but I hope to one day.”
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
2 years
I would pay double my Hulu subscription to get episodes of The Kardashians with Kourtney and Travis edited out
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
I did nothing to deserve turning 30
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
Having a fleeting moment of confidence
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
1 year
MEN. DO. NOT. HAVE. A. MID-LEVEL. JOB. AT. THEIR. MARKETING. AGENCY. THAT. THEY. COULD. HOOK. ME. UP. WITH
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
4 years
If I bring one bowl out of my room a day maybe my roommates won’t figure out I’m depressed
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
As California reopens it’s important to remember that anything we did during the pandemic doesn’t count. Did we text an ex? No we didn’t. Did we send some insane DMs? Not us. Did we learn to make whipped coffee? Prove it.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
10 years
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
People are really throwing around the word “adventure” too casually on dating apps. If you’re not stealing a long lost treasure you can just say you like to hike.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
4 years
@bocxtop We need 4 Republican senators to commit to not voting before the election. So far it looks like two already have. We’re looking at @SenatorCollins to commit to not vote.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
4 years
If you are gay and you aren’t paying attention to me you have a lot of internalized homophobia to work through
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
I will not be “putting myself out there.” If you want to date me you’ll have to break into my house.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
Why do I feel like they just told me I’m not hot enough to join Slytherin
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
If my friend introduces me to a group of new people it is their responsibility to give me a performance review the next day. Did everyone think I was funny? Did I get an A? Do I get a sticker? Etc. Etc.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
4 years
Making gay friends is like, “haha I can’t tell if we’re being mean because we don’t like each other or because we do!!!”
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
6 years
Wow I really want to look stocky
@GQMagazine
GQ Magazine
6 years
7 swim shorts made to show off stockier builds
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
10 years
Solange: Now it's time 4 everyone more famous than me to sit on the ground B: but you said wear white Solange: I know http://t.co/Vlync3PUrl
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
4 years
One of the cutest lil things my TV writer friends do for me is to not watch my show so I don’t have to watch theirs. This is how we show our love.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
If my doctor wants to call me cool he should just say that
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
7 years
Me on my death bed: I’m glad I spent all that time acting too cool for things!!!!
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
Happy Pride to my straight crush from highschool
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
4 years
@garrcie I’d also say that “checking in” isn’t always that helpful. Help them find a mental health professional. Make an appointment for them. Try to eliminate the hurdles that make seeking help difficult for someone with low energy and motivation.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
I can’t believe I used to wish I was straight. Now I couldn’t imagine being straight and I just wish I was a hotter gay guy instead.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
4 years
Where’s my, started the pandemic at one cup of coffee a day and is now ending at 16 cups a day, gang at?
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
1 year
@chescaleigh You can use the Chrome extension Simplify. You fill out common questions once and then it’ll auto fill it all for you on most apps. I’ve applied to a loooot of jobs since the strike started.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
I wanna complain about being depressed to my friend who is a therapist but he’s always like, “do these specific things to improve your mental health” and I have to be like “nooooooo”
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
5 years
@jaboukie @redletterdave You’re the only person on twitter making this primary bearable.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
@notn1co If you don’t need to apply spf50 to your taint the 👏 inseam 👏 is 👏 not 👏 short 👏 enough 👏
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
I want to have a fun conversation with an attractive gay guy that has a hint of flirtiness but we both know that we will never ever have sex
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
One time I left a guy’s place and he asked me to text him when I got home safe but then he never spoke to me again. Like… wouldn’t it have been the same if I died?
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
Sometimes I’m like, “ugh, why don’t I have gay friends?” and then I remember how offended I get when any gay man doesn’t immediately want to hook up with me
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
4 years
@calebsaysthings This is inducing a trauma response in me plllzzzz make it stop
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
@LouisPeitzman That’s what masturbating in front of a mirror for a year will do to you
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
2 years
@OrangePaulp And then she obviously helps the woman and her daughter in the end. Because that’s how a story works.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
4 years
Am I allowed to post something like this? My boss follows me.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
4 years
Am I dating a 23 year old because I found my first grey hair, or did I find my first grey hair because I’m dating a 23 year old?
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
My boyfriend and I ran into a guy that dumped me at CVS while we were buying lube and he was buying a jumbo pack of toilet paper. Nature is healing 🥰🥰🥰
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
@CloseConformity I... am 6'2". Is my Twitter giving short king?!
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
4 years
@calebsaysthings @ItsDanSheehan Was literally having trouble reading it
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
2 years
My ultimate hater (God) wants to see me shit my pants before I make it to the bathroom so bad. He failed again today. Pathetic.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
6 years
If your parents follow you on social media you do not have to call them
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
The thing I’ll miss the most about San Fran is the lighting in my hotel bathroom and like… the culture.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
listen to my body? I just slept for 8 hours and woke up tired. My body doesn’t know shit.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
I get so much more dick than the guys that bullied me in middle school. They’re not gay, but still.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
I love a short king with giant muscles. Get over here u lil knockwurst.
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
4 years
Everyone is like “poor Wanda so lonely that she is living in a made up TV world,” but no one cared when I had no friends in middle school and would pretend I was Veronica Mars
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
2 years
What beautiful queer storytelling from The Last of Us
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
4 years
Here are some tips on how to make your Nose Job Tik Tok more enjoyable for all: - only count down a MAX of 3 days until surgery! - include before, immediately after, and COMPLETELY HEALED. NO PART 2! - do a side by side before and after! - tag ur doctor! (this is just manners)
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
2 years
Not to brag but my belly button picks up lint better than most vacuums sold on Amazon
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@AMFreund
Alex Freund
3 years
The way my dad barges into my room he must not know about masturbation.
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