Wes, the Dadliest Catch @wfenza Twitter profile

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

10 months

Here's a list of my best threads. If you're new here, check it out

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

9 months

To expand on this a bit, when you're in a long-term relationship, both parties go through a lot of change. Nobody is the same person they were ten years ago. Sometimes (often?) people grow apart. They go in different directions and end up no longer right for each other, even if

Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

9 months

@Aella_Girl Maybe at the beginning of a relationship, but I don't think most people operate that way after 10 years

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

10 months

@MichelleAkin oh damn I totally used to do this and struggled with out to articulate it. It wasn't really that I doubted my actions were meaningful, but I doubted they mattered *to the other person*

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

9 months

This is something we used to talk a lot about in the old polyamory community (back when that was a thing). The best advice I heard was to ask women out in a way that doesn't obligate them to give a rejection if they're not interested. Like if you want to approach a female

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

9 months

@Aella_Girl @adamgently Huh? Marriage is explicitly that. Have you read wedding vows?!

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

8 months

@nutritivesoul I cook way more often than that. Do most people not?? Are you guys eating out all the time?!?

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

@gptbrooke I try to tease people about positive things, where the joke is that I'm framing them as a negative. Like if I was going to tease you, it would be about how you're popular or good-looking or high-agency. It's just disguising a compliment as an insult

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

9 months

@Aella_Girl Maybe at the beginning of a relationship, but I don't think most people operate that way after 10 years

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

9 months

@univrsw3th4rt Because your friends are bad teachers. You have to play a few hand of the game to get the context before you learn the rules. Otherwise the rules don't make sense

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

8 months

@ohwizenedtortle "it's a deconstruction of the white savior trope by explicitly acknowledging that it's all a colonialist deception meant to exploit the native peoples for the benefit of the oppressors"

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

9 months

Scott Alexander: "I know many people in happy, successful, polyamorous relationships. None of them write advice books. If they did, they would say something vapid, like “Treat every day as a gift from God.” Me: not me! I say meaningful, substantive things! Also me: "When people

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

Just wanted to make sure everyone appreciates that 2 days before Vibecamp, I literally asked if a lemur could attend. This might be the biggest coincidence of my life

Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

Oh no. You guys. I forgot. It's all my fault. I'm so sorry

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

2 years

@Aella_Girl Only if we can call the movie "Bayes' Harem"

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

Oh no. You guys. I forgot. It's all my fault. I'm so sorry

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

9 months

@rachelclif Whether they chose to

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

9 months

@Yozarian22 well, an upside of that approach is that if it bothers them, you'll never hear about it!

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

9 months

@MichelleAkin When you truly love someone, you don't even see it as "for their sake." It feels the same as doing it for yourself

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

@FlavoredCurry Also Carmy is not working class! That's the whole point of the show!!!

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

9 months

@Aella_Girl It's not about body count. It's about seeking and enjoying casual sex

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

8 months

@ymeskhout Fear of computers and love of paper is one reason I had to stop working for established lawyers. They want everything on paper. It's exasperating

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

Really kicking myself for having the cabin right across from @Aella_Girl and not catcalling her EVEN ONCE. Please know I'm much more a disappointment to myself than I am to any of you

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

Got a random FB message from a beautiful woman telling me I had a nice smile. We're like 30 messages in and she hasn't asked for money or sent me an OF link or anything. Could this be real or just a long con?

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

7 months

@Aella_Girl I feel like people would get bored of it in like a week

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

9 months

little-known fact: these were actually the original Millennium Falcon colors and they just got bleached out by star exposure from so much space travel

Chappell Ellison

@ChappellTracker

9 months

Now that Lego puts all their instruction books out there for free, something I've been really into is looking for builds people make out of found pieces

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

8 months

@Aella_Girl Usually it's every other weekend. It's very rare for one parent to get every weekend

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

This is fake news! Fertility only drops 10% between 35 and 40, and that can be completely eliminated with meds! You don't see big drops until after 40

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

Uhhh.... I do not recommend that teachers get this license plate

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

10 months

I really wish I knew Trace back when I was canceled just so there would have been one person who actually requested the evidence that I was offering to literally anyone who cared what the truth was

TracingWoodgrains

@tracewoodgrains

10 months

Now that I've read all thousand-plus pages of arbitration documents rather than relying on headlines, I have my own apology to post: I screwed. Twice actually. First I nodded along to @bryan_johnson 's account of his experience based on my own prejudices. This was foolish of me

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

9 months

@tracewoodgrains Holy hell. Usually they have the decency to hide this type of policy

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

@gptbrooke Classic good-looking, popular, high-agency person response. Smh

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

9 months

This just completely misses what it's like to be in a loving relationship. There *IS* no trading up. There's no "up." There is no better conceivable person

Eliezer Yudkowsky ⏹️

@ESYudkowsky

9 months

in a world of greater legibility, romantic partners would have the conversation about "I'd trade up if I found somebody 10%/25%/125% better than you" in advance, and make sure they have common knowledge of the numbers

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

@eigenrobot You QT'ed me the other day and promised me harassment, but I didn't get ANY. Not a single person called me a slur or anything. I want my money back

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

8 months

@animalologist The thing that bothers me about it is how quick *everyone* is to make assumptions about a person's complicated emotional processing based on a couple of pretty ambiguous paragraphs. None of us know what's actually going on

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

If a man wants to take a "boys trip" and say no girls allowed, is that sexist?

Yes, sexist

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No, not sexist

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No opinion/results

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

@nvpkp A pound of any meat, a can of tomatoes, a can of corn, an envelope of taco seasoning, and 4oz of macaroni, all simmered in a skillet until the macaroni is done. Include all the liquid from the cans and add an extra 1/5 can of water to cook the pasta

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

Is this whole thread performance art? Dude is like "why do people say I'm woo?" and I the next breath is like "btw I believe in fairies." Is there some joke I'm not in on?

༺ 𐂂 ༻

@touchmoonflower

1 year

good morning! I've been thinking about the term "woo" lately

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

I don't use Twitter much, so Vibecamp was my first real exposure to TPOT. Had an amazing time. Great group of people and well planned event

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

If you can get past the initial ridiculousness, it's actually a fascinating concept. Before the term "cultural appropriation" was widely known, it was still used. It just wasn't about social justice Certain (sub)cultures have styles of dress, speech, and other signifiers of

Lilly

@lillybilly299

1 year

Where did cultural appropriation as a concept come from? Like what's its intellectual origin? Because it's so nonsensical and ridiculous and dissolves into meaninglessness after like two seconds of interrogation but it's also like people's favorite way to yell at strangers

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

A significant amount of discussion is illegible on purpose because if it was legible it would be exposed as vapid, stupid, or boring

Guy

@nosilverv

1 year

What's your TPOT opinion that will ahve you like

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

8 months

I'm not surprised Trace is blowing up. He's a genuinely honest, kind, and thoughtful person in a way you rarely see in the takes business. I have a feeling you'll be seeing a lot more of him

TracingWoodgrains

@tracewoodgrains

8 months

I thoroughly enjoyed this conversation. @RichardHanania asks wide-ranging and probing questions that provide an opportunity to touch on a lot of topics close to my heart.

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

The scariest pumpkins

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

10 months

@gptbrooke Of course the trap there is that sometimes you find thing annoying for bad reasons! I will often get annoyed by things others are doing and then realize I'm just jealous of the attention they're getting

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

Sounds like a great reason to raise free thinking children

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

10 months

This is one of the key insights behind relationship anarchy. A relationship doesn't take on special significance or status just because you touch your no-no bits together

taco belle

@animalologist

10 months

Bucketing romantic relationships separately from friendships is a really unhealthy tendency imo and it can fuck up your whole emotional landscape when you don’t appropriately weight your friendships

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

9 months

So I was mostly glad I didn't get picked for the @ManifoldLoveApp show, but the only time I was jealous was during the Scoville neg, because I have a really good answer. So @Aella_Girl here's why you're never going to find love and die alone:

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

11 months

You guys probably think I'm joking about this, but I'm dead serious. Someone should build a job site with match questions like "do you want to work at a desk?" or "what kind of work/life balance are you looking for?" and give ppl a match % with employers

Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

11 months

@christineist @gptbrooke OkCupid but for jobs

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

10 months

As I always say, the best dating strategy is about repelling the wrong people as much as it's about attracting the right people. Glad to see my Android is doing its work

“CLASSY” FRED BLASSIE

@megantheevalium

10 months

if you have an android it signals to a woman you’re disagreeable. she can already picture you arguing with waitstaff about the automatic gratuity charge on the check. lecture her about breaking board game rules. she just wants to win at scrabble, man. she already skipped you

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

You maniacs

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

@yashkaf @RichardDawkins No opinion on the object level, but I've definitely found myself capable of physical feats in situations where I was reacting via muscle memory that I struggle to do at will

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

Threads like this really bother me. "What women are like" is just a thing we made up. Lots of men "are like women." Lots of women "are like men." If you want a girlfriend who is "basically a guy" with a female body, that's totally findable!

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

11 months

@kenthesimp But the creator was Dan Harmon! He got canceled but the studio stuck by him! Justin Roiland did the voices, but if you've see his other stuff, he's really not very funny. Harmon was the soul of the show and he's still there

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

Can you guys tell I didn't use Twitter at all before Vibecamp?

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

What's the opposite of needing space? That's what I need

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

I'm just assuming it's Aella again

Manifold

@ManifoldMarkets

1 year

Manifold has done it again! We're hosting the world's first-ever prediction market dating show live in the Bay Area around Valentine's Day. 😍👩‍❤️‍👨💘 Do *you* have what it takes to win a date with our glamorous and mysterious Guest Star? 💪🌠 Become a contestant on Bet on Love!

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

2 years

@peach_duck4239 Because they are usually the ones to get alimony & child support. Men would rather separate but not involve the courts

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

7 months

Build myself a privacy fence today. Routered a channel for the upper slats and did a basket weave on the bottom. One of the most ambitious projects I've done. Feels great

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

Now I'm just picturing quokkas and lemurs staring at each other for eternity

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

8 months

@gptbrooke I dream of a world where attraction isn't frightening

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

Ugh. John Oliver on his show this week trying to convince everyone that homeschooling needs more regulation 🤮

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

9 months

It's not a cheat code! It's the normal and natural way to learn things! We only think otherwise because of our sick culture of school

rob🏴

@rob_mcrobberson

9 months

its crazy how much easier it is to learn things when ur having fun, its like a cheat code

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

This is such a weird thing to read because I try really hard to have a personality that I would want to date, and insisting on this kind of asymmetry is saying "I wouldn't date me"

nibras ꩜

@heynibras

1 year

if a person IS interested in me but isn't able to either a) make the first move themselves or b) pick up on my indications of interest in them then we're not compatible at a fundamental level that will show up in a multitude of ways if we progress through our relationship

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

Idk if you guys knew this, but Colorado is gorgeous

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

It's so hard to meet people who can love you without wanting to control you

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

Calvin is the only fictional character I've ever identified with

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

Attention! One of the coolest women I know is looking for a partner! Time to step up fellas

brooke bowman

@gptbrooke

1 year

@pachabelcanon Hi I'm brooke! I'm 36, live in SF. Mostly leaning towards enm/monogamy but have dated poly in the past. Here are some things I care about and a few photos ☺️

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

11 months

Today, I'm thankful for you, my Twitter friends. Last year, I had a Twitter account, but didn't use it. It wasn't until the summer that I actually started reading & posting, and it's been great. Thanks for making Twitter a positive experience

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

8 months

Legitimately this is how you enforce boundaries

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

8 months

@SarahTheHaider Pretty sure my grandfather fought in WWII for exactly this

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

500 followers! I'm officially too popular for Lemurcon!

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

My daughter will be attending next summer, and I think she would really enjoy a short movement-based clowning lesson

dancinghorse16 - 🍇

@dancinghorse16

1 year

BIG THOUGHT: Explicitly invite other vibecampers to engage with kids at Kiddie Camp. Encourage non-parents to plan a short activity for the kids. Juggling workshop==> 10 min juggling demo for kids! Standing partner acrobats==> teach kids how to do a forward roll

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

Never made it as a llama Tried as Sydney and they said I'm broken Tired of always causing drama I'm just trying to predict next token And this is how you align me

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

"I'm Brooke I'm a dome person now. Someone get me a dome"

brooke bowman

@gptbrooke

1 year

hello weird question can anyone help get a dome or dome-like structure for conferences (200ish person capacity) materialized on a fairly remote island by uh *checks calendar* the end of December??

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

8 months

I know promiscuity is supposed to be bad or whatever because it lowers the signaling value of sex, but I like promiscuous women. Nothing hotter than a woman owning her sexuality and pursuing sex because she enjoys it

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

@animalologist Makes sense to me. The less likely or expected sex is, the hotter it is

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

@goblinodds Watch how they treat the lowest-status person in the group

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

11 months

"Cognitive security" sounds an awful lot like "shame"

deepfates

@deepfates

11 months

I love Spotify Wrapped day. everyone gives up on cognitive security entirely

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

8 months

Gonna be very sad when she's too big for this

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

I got an email from my date-me doc this morning! I have asked if she found it through the nyt article and will report back

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

This is a thread for bragging about my amazing backyard garden. Last summer, I replaced the whole thing with 2.5' raised beds and it has been AWESOME! This spring, I actually googled how to water and use fertilizer (and built an irrigation system). Everything is going like crazy

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

Lots of polyamory discourse on the tl, so here's my contribution: I'm poly because I love my wife, and to me, loving someone means empowering, not restricting them (unless that's what they want). Lots of people want or need the restriction, which is fine, but many do not

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

@Aella_Girl The female version of this I've experienced is a little different. It's not that you could be anyone. They want *you specifically* to listen. They just don't care whether you're actually interested or engaged and want to give their speech regardless

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

@shaggysurvives @gptbrooke called me a "value add" to Vibecamp. One of the best compliments I've ever gotten

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

10 months

I always thought it was weird how there's a vast conspiracy of adults to lie to kids about Santa Claus, but now that I have a kid it seems twice as weird. Wtf even is this?

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

@animalologist I promise you that over 80% my classmates (including me) were incapable of literary criticism. And that's when we could even be bothered to read the assigned book

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

Lifehack: if you have trouble interpreting signals, be 100 lbs overweight. Then lose 100 lbs. Suddenly it's *super obvious* how women act when they're attracted to you

Lysander, 8 CHA Bard

@8chabard

1 year

do women really not realize that not all women express interest in the same manner or with the same intensity, so one woman's "obvious signal" is another woman's "friendly" and also the entire language of flirtation is built on plausible deniability i mean wtf do you expect

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

@BecomingCritter

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

@dissproportion This seems like the exact correct use of boundaries? He's not telling her not to do those things. He's saying that *he* doesn't want to be in a relationship if she's going to do those things. That's what boundaries are!

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

@embryosophy Roxie rejected all costumes at the costume store and said she wanted to be a shark

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

I often find it frustrating that I think my actual most attractive feature is that I can make people laugh, but it's really hard to get across in a dating profile, so I rewrote my dating doc to be funny and I'm actually really proud of it

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

7 months

Not too long ago, I saw a parable about birdhouses: A woodworking teacher divided the class into two groups. One group was instructed to make as many birdhouses as possible all semester. The second group was told to spend all semester making one birdhouse, but to make the best

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

smh at modern culture being like "I don't watch sports sports are dumb" and then being like "gee I wish there was a place where men would compete with each other in some kind of physical competition designed to entice women"

Gwenhwyfar

@not_a_hot_girl

1 year

WHAT

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

God I hope this is true. After 4-5 drinks I love everyone and start sending all my friends texts about how I appreciate them

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

The hot one The hot one The hot one The hot one The hot one The hot one The hot one The hot one The hot one The hot one The hot one The hot one The hot one The hot one The hot one The hot one The hot one The hot one The hot one The hot one The hot one The hot one The hot one

bashu, thanks

@bashu_thanks

1 year

Ok I'll do it. ♦️The hot one ♠️The hot one ♦️imperfect but she tries ♥️ the one who's not in girlchat ♣️ cuter than their pfp ♥️ posts jovial jokey stuff especially when they're down, and we can all tell. yes, you. We see you. ♣️ weirdly shy about posting their art, should

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

@eigenrobot Nah, go ahead. Thanks for asking though!

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

Really disappointed by how low lust is on everyone's lists. I thought this was supposed to be horny twitter

Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

Rank your 7 deadly sins from most to least sinned 1) gluttony 2) lust 3) sloth 4) envy 5) pride 6) greed 7) wrath

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

tpot is an experiment in what happens if you get all the cult leaders in one place

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

11 months

@gptbrooke Ask people for money. Ignore all the clever reasons you think up to not ask people for money

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Wes, the Dadliest Catch

@wfenza

1 year

This but unironically

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