V_RB @verbstract Twitter profile

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V_RB

@verbstract

12 years

I've heard of batman, superman, spiderman... But.. what are Suleiman's superpowers?

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V_RB

@verbstract

3 months

Safaricom fixed the cables just in time for that narcissist’s speech.

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@verbstract

3 years

My mother sent me this…. Onions 😭

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@verbstract

4 months

It’s like Kalenjins knew what president they’re leaving behind when they all decided to move to Perth, Australia. 😒

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@verbstract

4 years

Why does this guy look like an XYZ puppet?

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@verbstract

2 years

The person who said we should all sneak out of Kenya in the middle of the night and leave the government and politicians with nothing was really onto something.

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@verbstract

3 months

157 casualties as at 5:45am. And this was just at KNH. Man I hope that man and his political allies, his roaches and anything affiliated with him die horrible deaths. #RejectFinanceBill2024

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@verbstract

5 years

@viibew_h Hilarious that we have the same workout routine here in Africa. But ours is a bit extreme with some painful consequences

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@verbstract

3 years

A car might be a liability but good lord the convenience of having one makes up for all that shit.

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@verbstract

3 years

Wacha nikupatie number yake mubishane

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@verbstract

4 years

Kahush on slow kisses “You got daddy issues I got all the issues...” Yes Kahumburu, we’ve been having issues with your daddy..

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@verbstract

3 years

I hope huko Rift Valley kuna mtu ame invent cocktail inaitwa Kalen Gin. Pia na hope hiyo cocktail sio jokes. Inakimbiza mse.

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@verbstract

3 years

Kama we ni mse wa nywele ndengu..

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@verbstract

2 years

My mother’s reaction to my profile picture. Dramatic 😅

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@verbstract

1 month

Ruto lies: A portrait. Click on any dot.

Ruto Lies: A Portrait

An interactive digital portrait of Kenya’s President Ruto, composed of over 5,000 tweets reflecting the sentiments of Kenyans during the #RejectTheFinancialBill2024 demonstrations.

ruto-lies.thraets.org

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@verbstract

3 years

I would really like to see the furniture Jesus made during his time as a carpenter.

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@verbstract

5 years

They used to make fun of me and say “boy short, fat, round, you don’t know stomach is where and back of stomach is where”

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@verbstract

3 years

Have you ever eaten so much at Fogo Gaucho till they started avoiding your table? 😂

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@verbstract

11 months

Pickpockets can make a killing selling us back our I.D cards 😂

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@verbstract

3 years

Do you ever call someone and hope they won’t pick up? 😂

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@verbstract

4 years

Smart designs for small spaces

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@verbstract

5 years

Leo nimeskiza Vybz radio. Kwamboxx: congratulations. You’re the winner of 1000 shillings. The winner: Nitakuambia number ya kutuma. I think winner amefuliza. 😭😭😭

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@verbstract

5 years

KONDA: Faster faster kidogo tukiondoka.. ME:

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@verbstract

3 years

Suicide in an office is sending a message. No?

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@verbstract

2 years

This. But on a lady’s tshirt 😃😃😃😃😃

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@verbstract

5 years

Why did the bike guy stop? 😂😂😂😂

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@verbstract

7 years

Dear Zimbabwe, How are you guys doing after Mugabe?

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@verbstract

4 years

😂😂😂😂😂😂

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@verbstract

5 years

“An holiday..” so you definitely said oliday in your head 😂

Aleckie Ronald

@SirAlexas

5 years

If Eliud Kipchoge runs below 2 hours, we deserve an holiday to celebrate that....

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@verbstract

5 years

YOUTUBE: I’m Janelle Mon... ME:

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@verbstract

1 year

Mi naeza jiita mkutano alafu bado nichelewe ama ni cancel last minute.

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@verbstract

6 years

Ola.. So I do a bit of photo-manipulation. Please RT my client may be on your TL. Cheers 😊

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@verbstract

5 years

That wig should be confiscated first

Nation Africa

@NationAfrica

5 years

NYS scandal: Ngirita assets declared proceeds of crime

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@verbstract

3 years

Kudos to all KE companies that have embraced working remotely to allow more flexibility in employees' daily lives.

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@verbstract

6 years

90's artists were so reckless with their car keys. In 1997 Beenie Man lost the keys to his beema while Missy Elliott's couldn't tell who had the keys to the Jeep.

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@verbstract

5 years

Mapua yako inakaa kuku porno

Kimanzi®™

@Kimanzi_

5 years

Ka vizuri tukupige picha.

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@verbstract

4 years

My friends and I when the security guy holds up a paper with a number plate to move a car when we all know very well we Ubered 😂

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V_RB

@verbstract

7 years

When u go to the Hilton in Paris, how do they receive u? “Welcome to Hilton Paris, Paris Hilton” “Welcome to Paris’s Hilton, Paris Hilton”🤔

Paris Hilton

@ParisHilton

7 years

What's on your mind?

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@verbstract

1 year

Kenyans who never vote waking up early next elections just to make sure this administration is not back.

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@verbstract

6 years

GUYSSSSS GUYS! Missy is in my mentions 😭😭😭😭😭😭

Missy Elliott

@MissyElliott

6 years

@verbstract @ChrisKross77 😂🤣🤣😂🤣😂😂😂😂

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V_RB

@verbstract

4 months

What a night. Dave Chappelle said he’s coming back in November. Prepare your millions. He’s bringing the whole crew. Kanye, Black Star etc for an African tour.

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V_RB

@verbstract

3 years

Looks like even Spider Suleiman has his own smoking thingy.

ChampagneJuJu

@jujuhabashy

3 years

Spider-Man: Inshallah finally home

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V_RB

@verbstract

3 years

“You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain.”

Mohammed Ali, HSC

@MohaJichoPevu

3 years

Warrant of arrest ni wewe. Fanyeni bidii pia leo ni trend kama jana😂😂.

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V_RB

@verbstract

4 years

Don’t be ashamed of who you are. That’s your friends' job.

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@verbstract

4 years

Mse wa Glovo akipigia Arum after kujipata Delamere badala ya Worcestershire 😂

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V_RB

@verbstract

4 years

Communication back in the day: As per my last smoke signal...

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@verbstract

4 years

*Covid-19 cases on the rise* Kenyans visiting clubs:

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V_RB

@verbstract

6 years

Eliud Kipchoge should have his own line of Nike shoes just like Jordan and Lebron. G.O.A.T.

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@verbstract

5 years

Huwa hamlali hii Nairobi

Njoki-Wa-Wanjoki'SportsHub 🇰🇪

@Njoki_Wa_Wajoki

5 years

Hoods 3k WhatsApp 0705780356

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V_RB

@verbstract

3 months

But why? 😂😭 Anyway.. remain focused #RutoMustGo

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@verbstract

4 years

God is it because we can’t pronounce croissant?

Mr. Kinuthia Pius.

@Belive_Kinuthia

4 years

BREAKING NEWS: The Prime Minister of France Edouard Philippe and his government have all resigned.

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@verbstract

6 years

(At the dry cleaners) KING KAKA: My laundry isn't ready!? *Storms out* LAUNDRY-WOMAN: Don't go I'm kunjaing....

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@verbstract

3 years

You know!

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@verbstract

7 years

imagine minding your own business enjoying a Nduthi ride then....

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@verbstract

4 years

We were just having a good day then..

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@verbstract

5 years

Our prices are based on our talents, not your budget.

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@verbstract

6 years

💭aki ya nani.. Hii ni rangi ya carrot...💭

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@verbstract

6 years

Who has Kenya's reset button because..

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@verbstract

4 years

You should have used one of these as your bottles.

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@verbstract

5 years

It's deliberate. It's a pun

Kinyanjui Gitau 🔰

@LemurKinyash

5 years

Whoever is doing their editing please see me 😂😂

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V_RB

@verbstract

7 years

Gone too soon. Childhood - 2017 R.I.P. Ball ya juala

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@verbstract

3 years

What do you call mtu wa ku negotiate vitanda? Abednego.

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@verbstract

5 years

Forever funny 😂😂😂😂😂

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@verbstract

6 years

If he has an E in math, that makes it meth. Fitting.

Elkins | Your Marketing Guy 🇰🇪

@Elee_Global

6 years

Governor Hassan Joho 001 chilling at his home with his E in Maths this weekend... What are you doing with your A in Maths? 🤭

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@verbstract

4 years

ODB9EYQTGZ Confirmed. You have received Ksh..

a |-/🍉

@pointalaline

5 years

Bomboclaat

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V_RB

@verbstract

3 years

If I was 50% Kenyan, I'd be Ken.

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V_RB

@verbstract

7 years

Game Of Thrones characters dressed as Maasais courtesy of OMG Voice. A mini thread.

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@verbstract

8 years

Best thing I’ve seen today 😂😂

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@verbstract

4 years

Fuck cancer. Fuck Israel. But most of all... Fuck Babu Owino.

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V_RB

@verbstract

6 years

Opposite ya Mwass ni Mwtitties?

Mwang!

@Mwass_

6 years

Opposite ya Kinoo ni Kiyess?

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V_RB

@verbstract

4 years

What about discrimination at work places? Or y’all are not ready for that conversation? Bringing clueless “expats” from ________ to do the same thing qualified Kenyans can and paying them 5x more. 🌚

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V_RB

@verbstract

4 years

I wish it was a law for every compound to have at least one tree in Nairobi.

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V_RB

@verbstract

9 years

Why is it called suspense and not

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V_RB

@verbstract

3 years

Aye, protector, gatekeeper, warden of beachfront properties. We know I t’s Eleven Pearl Boutique hotel. And I hope travel companies give offers so that people can flock there in numbers. 😁

Fatma Bakthir

@fatmabakthir

3 years

Beachfront restaurants serving not only good ambience but amazing food and privacy, are very rare to find in Diani. So allow me not to disclose the location and be selfish with this place 😌

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V_RB

@verbstract

6 years

Them: Twende coast Me: Sawa. Saa ngapi? Them: 3pm Me: Sawa. Tuna lala wapi? Them: tutajua Me: tuna enda aje? Them: drive down then fly back Me: safi.. *Long pause* Me: na gari ita rudi aje? Them: Tutajua Me: Ndani..

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V_RB

@verbstract

3 years

Men’s personal care products are so weirdly multi-purposed. Nivea Men Mule kick. All purpose shower gel. Body, face, hair, bbq grill & engine. With Shell Helix Ultra 5W-40.

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V_RB

@verbstract

6 years

In other news.. This is so dope. Tag the artist..

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@verbstract

5 years

@KielelezoKipya @MichaelSctMoore Did you read both tweets or you’re just trigger happy?

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@verbstract

4 years

@ArtcaffeKenya You’re still trying to espresso your way out of this?

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@verbstract

4 years

Ah 😂😂😂😂😂💀💀💀💀💀 This took me out

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@verbstract

5 years

Parte after parte featuring @Maxammad_Amin ‘s fridge and of course Mwass and I had to be extra. 😆

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@verbstract

5 years

Uko VIP mse.

Here we go!

@DaviesKinanga

5 years

Hii Mat3 huku nyuma hakuna viti mbili...😂

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@verbstract

3 years

No good morning, no how did you sleep, no have you had breakfast 💀

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@verbstract

6 years

Are those ducks in the lake? I feel like one is being left behind. This is not very good parenting

Your Favourite Realtor

@MissGichuru_

6 years

That view 😍😍

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@verbstract

5 years

@OffsetYRN

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@verbstract

5 years

[If we had sheng subtitles] ACTOR: Hey... NETFLIX: OYA OYA OYA OYA OYA....

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@verbstract

5 years

Ukiniambia twende kwa counter tukunywe shots ujue ni wewe unalipa otherwise niache penye umenipata.

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@verbstract

2 years

Mwenda’s are launching their signature cocktails tomorrow

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@verbstract

4 years

Hi. So.. How does a giraffe wear a necktie? 1st, 2nd or 3rd frame?🤔

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@verbstract

5 years

Khai!!!!!! 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

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@verbstract

8 years

Some of you motherfuckers are creative

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@verbstract

3 years

Mi huona mtu anakunywa Hennessy nashindwa alikosa tu pombe ingine yoyote? hata supu ya battery?

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@verbstract

5 years

This is how all women in shags sit on the grass in their lesos

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@verbstract

6 years

I don't understand why people say such hurtful things like "Tumia stairs" or "Avocados zimeisha.."

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@verbstract

3 years

I’m surprised and partly underwhelmed that Zulu Meats does not tweet like a South African. If I was them bengizokushiya ulenga. ngisho leso sixoliso noma isitatimende esishisiwe ngabe bekungesixhosa noma isizulu.

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@verbstract

6 years

Is it safe to travel to the U.K?