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Tonnie Moremi Profile
Tonnie Moremi

@tonniie

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Following
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®️aconteur. Football - La Liga - Real Madrid. F1

Here & there
Joined June 2020
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
Story Za Tonnie : AirBnb party gone wrong. Airbnb is a service mostly for travelers looking for a space to stay, in Kenya though we use the service mostly to host private parties. Sometimes though, the parties might not go as planned, like in our case with my Boyz... Skiza story
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 months
Larry knows ball, this was such a great move #RejectFinanceBill2024
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
Me to the Boyz before I prepare the beef stew. "Kuna mtu hakulangi pilipili?"
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
7 months
Me from the kitchen: "Unakulanga pilipili?"
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 years
Lock down ingeekwa jana, Moh Salah angebaki Nairobi, ingebidi achezee Gor.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
11 months
"Nitakureplacia ID"
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
2 years
Siet, hio thread ya Backshots.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 months
Kama hauko ground, make sure you push the agenda on all socials. Retweet any post that will help our course, it's equally important. #REJECTFINANCEBILL2024 #occupyparliament
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
8 months
Nikipata Real Househelps of Kawangware from Season 1 naeza watch tena. Probably the greatest show from KE ever.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
12 days
Ukijiposition vizuri unaezapata umesign Mbappe for free kama Madrid.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
2 years
Pale Bomas Chebukati: ... and the president elect is..
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 months
Football Twitter wameshangaa mbona hawaoni banter from Kenya, smol smol investigation wakapata tuko maandamano ikabidi wamejoin, tears in my eyes. We are massive.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
Story Za Tonnie : Just Party! Lakini UsiPartykane! House parties, the climax of campus life. In my time in Juja, I have attended a good number of these, but I have to say, they come with a fair share of drama, and sometimes I found myself right in the middle of it, Skiza Story.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
2 years
How it started How it's going
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
1 year
"Tumeagree ugali mayai, ama kuna mtu ambitious hapa?"
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
1 year
Countries ka Togo hunishtua sana. Hawatokei ata kwa news, whether ni politics, sports... Wtf happens in Togo?
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
1 year
Diamond just called 21 Savage Mzee Ishiirini na Moja. 😂😂😂
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
2 years
Story Za Tonnie : "Hello, Uko Wapi?" I think it's common knowledge that when your friend calls you on a Friday asking, "uko wapi wewee?" then, some sh!t is about to go down! That's exactly how my boyz and I were tricked into a "sherehe" without even planning. Skiza story...
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
8 months
Btw it's nice if a lady understands football, but too much knowledge of it is a bit mbadala. What do you mean "Everton are dangerous in set pieces"? Haha, hapana.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
Story Za Tonnie : Fatma The Phat ma'. See, in every man's sexual fantasy is a list of the different types of women he'd wanna bone before he meets his maker. My n!gga Jay, he'd kill for a Canadian coochie, for me though, a Somalian babe tops my list.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
5 months
"ama waachane na poem, niseme wadance?"
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 months
Wait, Osama anaambia president "unapenda uongo sana", maybe we should let him cook. 😂😂😂
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
8 months
Chemutai is Goin?
@Kenyans
Kenyans.co.ke
8 months
Chemutai Goin to leave Citizen TV in March
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 months
Nimeona one of my bodies huko IG akiwa na wine glass in a bathtub. From stoke city to PSG kama Choupo-Moting, haha.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
8 months
It's not just me, right? 😂😂
@__Temptress_
Temptress🍸 🫶🏼
8 months
Little devil but still an angel at heart..my office couch turned studio💀
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
8 months
Unapigisha Dem Sherehe Burudani Address Ukidhani Ata-undress, But Instead, Anakuacha Na One Chwani Na Stress. A THREAD.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
10 months
"Umesahau aje Ovacado?"
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 months
Leo msijaribu kutuconfuse tafadhali, we have only one agenda. #RejectFinanceBill2024
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 months
Larry Madowo anatupiga assists kama prime KDB, hii game tunawin, there's no other outcome. #RejectFinanceBill2024
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 years
Story Za Tonnie Sn 3 Ep 8 (Tenda Wema Pewa Tako 🍆🍑💦) "Tenda Wema..." is a famous swahili saying, but let's be honest, it is also the hardest to execute😂. It's hard to find a person who does good without expecting something in return, well, I once did. Skiza Story....
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
17 days
Tipsy Gee will be hearing from my lawyers very soon.
@fabulousDoctor
Pekelee👨🏾‍⚕️
17 days
@tonniie Is the Founder of "Tenda wema Pewa Tako" slogan.😂
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
23 days
Madem hua na zero scouting skills, wanatakanga kusign galacticos kama Perez.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
My boy Sammie wasn't very lucky, ilikua midnight na kitu ameshikilia tu ni tumbler, anazurura ile mtaa kama invigilator. Lakini kusema ukweli, yule mans pale hangeteka, unaulizaje msupa ati "naitwa Sammie, unaeza niSammie-thia?" mistari gani hio? 🤦‍♂️
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
Ass yake ilikua imepop kama boil, then the shape, figure, from the waist down to the hips ako na curves kama freekick ya Beckham. Najua walisema dera bila tako ni kanzu lakini pia wangesema dress ikiwa na tako ni taabu.😍
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
2 years
Story Za Tonnie : This is why I Quit Tinder. A THREAD.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
Kidogo, Bobbie akafika na wale maghels, I tell you cabrones, Ivy na mabeshte zake walikua hot kama mafuta ya mandazi, wote wanaboronga rusungu kama Brooklyn natives, hata kama mimi hujichocha, hapa nayo I had no chance, lakini...si hata karobangi sharks walinyuka Everton? 🤔
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 years
Story Za Tonnie Sn 3 Ep 6( This Gender Can't Be Trusted ❌) I think we can all agree that women are better cheaters than men, despite the fact that men cause more heartbreaks. It's only because what we lack in skill, we make up for with numbers,men cheat a lot,women cheat well😂
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
Story Za Tonnie: COMBATO NI TRABO I think when Mr. Right said "Mi msee m-humble but all time najipata kwa trouble", he might have been referring to me. I don't have a better way to introduce this story because, mostly I don't look for trouble, trouble finds me.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
15 days
Red Card. 😭
@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
16 days
Kuna mahali nimeingia na high press already niko na two shots on target. Nothing but audacity.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
8 months
Just noticed Bensoul's "Navutishwa" ft Bien is exactly 4:20 long, haha I'm sure it was intentional.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 years
Story Za Tonnie Sn 3 Ep 5 (Bibi Ya Wenyewe Is A No Go Zone❌🚫🍆🍑) "Bibi ya wenyewe is a no go zone",You should take these lyrics from Sauti Sol's Extravaganza very seriously cabrones.Monkey business with another man's wife is very dangerous,I learned the hard way,Skiza Story..
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 years
Story Za Tonnie: Just Hit, Don't Commit 🔞💦. Oftentimes ladies say it's better to be straightforward about what you want from the start, is it a relationship that you want, or do you just want to smash? I agree, It's the right approach, but it hardly works, here's why..
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 years
Story Za Tonnie Sn 4 Ep 1 (Where Love is Involved, don't get involved❌🍆🍑) Have you ever seen a girl with some ninja and asked yourself, wtf does she see in him? There's only 2 answers to that, She either has been Dickmatized, or is genuinely in Love.The latter is real but rare
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
1 year
Hii asubuhi yote first thing naona tl ni dwarf ako na kigongi inatoshana half his height akidinyana on a live show... Wtf did I just watch? Day ruined.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
Story Za Tonnie: Dream ya kutoka kwa Block. Yaani kuget rich, kuomoka in-short, but the journey isn't always the smoothest. They say don't give up yet, your next move might be your breakthrough. So, could this be Vin's breakthrough? Skiza story...
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 years
Story Za Tonnie Sn 2 Ep 9(Why I Stopped Dating 😂🍆🍑) I have come to conclude that love is a scam,we're all in it for selfish reasons. Think about it, you are with someone because there's something they have that you like, from material things to looks, there's always something.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
2 years
I got balloons today.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 years
Story Za Tonnie Sn 4 Ep 2 (Kamati Ya Roho Chafu😠🍆🍑) "Kamati Ya Roho Chafu" is one of the terms that came up in 2020, it simply means people who don't like to see others prosper. I believe we have all come across such people, personally I have, it's so frustrating, Skiza Story.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 months
Vile Osama ametetea Billy man, true friendship. #FreeBilly
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
"The manager encouraged us to aim high this season..."
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 years
Story Za Tonnie Sn 3 Ep 9 ( Happy Badday🎂🍷😂🍆🍑💦) As much as we all don't want to accept, the pressure to fit in is real in our campuses. The word "Kuomoka" has made the situation even worse. Some of us are pulling some outrageous stunts kutuonyesha wameomoka, Skiza Story..
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 months
Lakini huyo jamaa alijulia wapi kuride horse hio design, juu fala aliitoa teke kama Monaghan Boy, haha.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
Story Za Tonnie : Thick Thighs take lives. One time baby you're my motivation Two time what a beautiful creation Thick thighs save lives...I think I might have to disagree with Bien and Bensoul on this one. As far as I'm concerned, thick thighs almost took my life. Skiza Story..
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 months
Heri ingekua ni mimi nimeiba hiyo farasi, saa hii ningekua naroam Juja kama Thomas Shelby gaddamit.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
Alaaa... Cabron anaelekea bash iko na ghels from USIU na ananuka mutumba? To be honest, it made me a little uncomfortable, nilikua nataka ata kujichuja, lakini haidhuru, nikasema ata jusufu alikua mtumwa misri na mwisho akawa assistant wa Farao, iko nene! 😂
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 years
What's the toughest unit you ever took? 😭
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
16 days
Mapenzi. Kamare.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
2 years
Story Za Tonnie : Pirates Of Jujamaica. I know you know that Pwagu hupata Pwaguzi, but did you know that sometimes Pwagu na Pwaguzi wanaeza amua kupiga duo moja hatari kushinda Amos and Josh? A THREAD.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
15 days
Scenes:
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@Smurf_Nita
Smurf 🧚‍♀️
15 days
Ati mlisema a close friend of your man akihit on you it means the man isn't serious with you? Kuna mtu anauliza hapa😂😂
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
That night though I wasn't in the mood, plus that girl was too fly for me, I didn't think even in her drunk state, she would want anything to do with me. Dem lightskin, amepigwa box braids, amedunga dress fupi kuliko maombi ya lunch, tena inashow half of her tirries, damn 😍.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
1 year
Hapo Eve ni kama walighula. Kibe will have a field day with that video. 😂😂😂
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 years
Nikisample KAMENE, nitaGOROka. 😂
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
So they managed to get a 5 bedroom Airbnb along ngong road. On that Friday wakafika na birthday girl kucheck-in in the afternoon, bash ianze jioni. Mi niliwasukumia Mia saba nilikua nayo shingo upande, angalau niwe nimechangia, lakini nilibaki empty kama kanisa jumatatu.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 years
Story Za Tonnie: When She Shoots Her Shot 🔞💦. A woman will rarely make the first move even when she's obviously attracted to a particular man, this is because stereotypically it is the role of a man to initiate dates or sexual encounters...
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
1 year
Olunga amerequest tujaze Kasarani on Tuesday, I don't see why we can't. I will be there.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
Story Za Tonnie : Diva From Tinder😍. With the rise of social media, it was only a matter of time before online dating became a thing. Nowadays we even have Apps made specifically for online dating, Tinder is a classic example.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
2 years
I met two girls kwa gate on Saturday night, they requested to use my bathroom,... Hii itabidi imekua thread.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 years
Tonnie Wa Juja :THE MAKING OF A CABRON🔞 Episode 1(HAGA🍑VS HUNGER) They say this is a small broke town I just happen to have come from shagz Pretty girls, big butts, I gotta get them this where it goes down I just don't how this shit works Sooner or later baby I gotta get them
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
Nikiwa pale kitchen nikiandaa, nikaskia knock kwa mlango, it was my boy Sammie, Cabron amesota kama mimi lakini ni big boy, ni kama amekula mashida mpaka akanona. Anyway, it meant I'd have to share my meal, so ile kanyama nikaipiga pilipili saba, kama atakula itabidi apambane..
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 months
Larry Madowo ladies and gentlemen, he is one us, he's us. Thank you. #RejectFinanceBill2024
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
I was tempted, lakini nikaambia abdala ajifunze kutulia, jamaa wa Sofapaka hawezi cheza mechi ya serie A😂. After a little while she said she was exhausted, she wanted to sit, but we only had one chair, she asked "is it okay if I sit on you, nimechoka"... Baaaaas.!
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 years
Kufika kwake kidogo nijichukie, wueh🔥, kwa mlango nilipatana na mat ya white, safi kushinda socks zangu😭. Next zilikua zile sandles za manyoya, alafu kachiwawa kamedoz kwa couch🔥, huyo angefika bedsitter yangu angedhani ni store ya mafundi😭...
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
8 months
The only man who could have saved Jowie.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 years
Story Za Tonnie Sn 4 Ep 4 ( HELL IN A CELL 🚔👮👹😭) When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second, When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's Albert Einstein on relativity. There's no better way to introduce this Story, so Skiza Story..
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
Is sex better when drunk, high, or sober?
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 months
She had seen the future. #RejectFinanceBill2024
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 years
Story Za Tonnie Sn 2 Ep 6 (Normalize Using Tools 🍆🍑💦) Utaskia Cabrons wakisema "dem ni kama swimming pool, don't worry about who has been swimming there, or who is swimming with you, or who will swim after you, just swim and leave", ati mali safi inede chain, dangerous M.O😨
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
Jioni everyone was excited kama wakisii siku ya sabbath. Mimi pale bedsitter nikaoga na ndoo, shower za bedsitter hazifanyangi bana. Nikapiga luku na sweatpant moja gwan, tisho fulani bado ilikua na perfume ya mtumba, mguu nikapiga converse, na juu nikaekelea Jacko ya mkadinali.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 years
What's the toughest Unit you ever took?
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
Kurudi pale living room, maninja na rusungu mingi, vichwa wamefunga durags, mikononi ni drugs, miguu wamepiga Jordans mbwakni, lakini mimi na converse zangu nilikua nakaa out of place kama vile unaeza pata mahindi moja ndani ya beans ukibuy pale kibandaski.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
2 years
The accuracy. 😂😂😂
@JoyJMurraya
⁴⁴₅₅¹⁶ ₈₁ Joy❤️‍🔥
2 years
Mimi usiniaddress na bado unajikojolea kwa kitanda bro🫶🏼
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
Once you start earning a good amount of money, the roles are reversed, your parents kinda become your kids, they have to ask for your opinion even in the tiniest family decisions.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
8 months
Name the trio.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
Akaniuliza kama naeza buy drink nikunywe hapo kwake, I mean why not? Akanipiga thao mbili akanishow nimletee tu joints, alafu mimi nijipange. Nilitoka nikikanyaga kubwa kubwa, a little voice in my head singing, "twinkle twinkle little star, point me to the nearest bar "
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
Haraka upesi akafungua side moja, songesha kando, slide in, sauti alitoa ni kama amekalia ile rungu ilimalisa Ringtone. Once in a lifetime opportunity for a cabron, I wasn't going to burst one, at least not until after 10 mins, I had to hold it together, hio coochie sio kienyeji.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
1 year
Nimeona video ya jamaa akiwa waxing na vile huyo dem anashika hiyo kigongi hapo siwezi survive. Labda nipitie mahali kwanza niempty the barrels ama nijipate nimempiga facial moja noma.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 years
Story Za Tonnie Sn 2 Ep 2("POLE POLE KIJANA YANGU " 🍆😂) In my clique nikiwa 3rd year kuna fala fulani alikua anaitwa Voke.Huyo jamaa manze alikua anaishi maisha ya coolkids na jamaa ametoka huko kijijini Nyamira😂.Voke hangewai kula chapo beans kama sisi broke cabrons buana😂
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
5 months
Me: Na ujue ni Chrome. Her: Niekee shot.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 years
Story Za Tonnie Ep 1 (My First Sleepover Ever🍑🍆💦) I was still in 1st year pale Juja boys(lakini siku hizi kuna madem buana😂), nlikua nimesuka huyo dem for like 5 months and I hadn't managed to go past her mammary glands😭. Finally the text I had been waiting for came...
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
Around 2am in the night, mi niko tipsy, naskia mlango ya balcony inasukumwa. Nilikua nimeiblock na kiti so nikaitoa nichungulie, it was Ivy and two of her friends. "Hey, you're here, my friend needs some fresh air, anafeel vibaya" Huyo dem alikua maji kama lorry ya clean water.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 years
Mbogi ya JUJA dandia Supermetro twende, kila mtu hapo kwa comments apigwe follow, lesssgo. 🔥
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 years
Somebody drew me, thank you for this piece👌. Imebaki nichorwe kwa Supermetro sasa😂. Check out _j.art.gallery on Instagram.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
Kufungua mlango, mans alipatana na 3 quickfire slaps akajikunja kama polythene juu ya moto. "Kila mutu kaa chini!" haraka upesi kama obidient citizens tukaketi. Turns out the only people in higher places that Mike knew was us, the high cabrones in the room.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
Pale Cabron alikua anacheza mbali kama Covid patient juu rejection ilikua inakaa sure kama arsenal kukosa champions League spot. Nikaamua kuwasha moja nisiteveve, kidogo dem akaniuliza "can you pass it"nikaipass haraka upesi. Maybe we could get along after all🤔.
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 years
Which series are you watching now?
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
10 months
Haha, mmeona huyo mans anadishi dem ka amembeba alafu vile inaslip out anaita boyz mwingine akuje airudishe ndani, wtf is that? 😂😂😂
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
Wakiwa kwenye excitement, mimi nikafika kitchen, nikachukua bowl fulani, ndani nikajaza masmokie, samosa, the chocolates, nikachukua mzinga ya Gilbeys na krest litre mbili, na nikachomoka kwa ile balcony ilikua na kiti. Sherehe yangu private vipolite, nikijifikirianga...
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
3 years
Never felt so proud to be Kenyan. This man, Eliud Kipchoge, goosebumps!
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@tonniie
Tonnie Moremi
4 months
Ndio ujue United fans can be stupid, jana Dess amenipigia 3 AM, kuamka nikapata missed call, nikadhani ata boyz maybe amelala ndani, kumcall back fala aniniambia ati alitaka kunishow yeye ni FA Cup champion.
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