tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿 @tessouthwell Twitter profile

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 months

0

9

Last Seen Profiles

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

5 months

Thinking about when I told my parents I was going sober but my dad found my staropramen stash on google street view

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

2 years

@BrandyLJensen

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

2 years

@SamYahia9 @jrc1921 You took a video of someone else’s video ……

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

6 years

@DannyDeVito Please run me over with your car

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

2 years

@queermurphys This is just crass

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@hasharin I know it’s because he’s dodgy but I love the idea that there’s a profession landlords look down on

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@kenklippenstein @bethanyshondark @OddHistorian @libbyemmons Seeing you here was like a jump scare

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

4 years

@talliesinyoung

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

6 months

UK not even on there .. what is happening to our country

female tyrant

@joannajnilson

6 months

WE DID IT LADIES 🎉🥳🍾

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@kenklippenstein @bethanyshondark @OddHistorian @libbyemmons And I’m single. Hi Ken

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@bigdybbukenergy I wish chess was real :(

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

4 years

@GeorgeMbofana1 People love to make racist jokes and then tell anyone who doesn't like it that they must not have a sense of humour. They never consider for a second that they're just not funny. It's amazing

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

2 years

@punished_cait Wait I thought people were using this image as a joke

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@hankgreen 😡

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@alyssaraetho There is actually a plethora of erotic fan fic about these two

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

4 years

@eyram_k @pixiemxrshall I remember someone from Vice talking about the difference between racism in America and the U.K. - in America it’s clear and overt, whereas in the U.K. it’s more of an undercurrent. It’s sinister that’s it’s ingrained into our culture so deeply that many don’t even notice it

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

2 months

Don’t often post sincere posts on here, but in honour of @JoeStephenson96 birthday I want people to know that he’s the kind of person who records audiobooks from your book club to listen to when you’re in the hospital

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

4 years

@sarahschauer I’m british and I started doing impressions of Americans doing british accents and now I can’t stop. It’s mental illness luv

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

2 years

@bestofpugh Looking camp right in the eye

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@EoinHiggins_ Aliens famously care about arbitrary borders on another planet

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

6 years

@BryanKemper Sorry Ryan

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

5 years

@gayh0rney Well maybe his daughter should have chosen a more original stripper name

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

4 years

@bethanymota1996 @gwsgab She’s not white so I doubt she thought he was a white supremacist

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

6 years

@BryanKemper That is four words Brian

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

7 months

@laurencesmb

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@clarebot Why does the cat look like a celebrity begrudgingly posing for a photo with a fan

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

4 years

@Timcast This is a bit harsh, Tim. It’s clear she is trying her best to do the right thing.

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@cornsyruplover @ZeroSuitCamus This is just joey graceffa

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@kattenbarge Always forgotten. Remembered never

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

4 years

@unit7forlife @redditships For some reason they think OP getting their own gender wrong is more plausible than a wlw relationship

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

6 months

Having worked for Amgueddfa Cymru and seeing all it’s done for young people (especially within the LGBTQ+ community) I can’t in good conscience back any Labour anymore. Plaid is the only party that cares about Wales, the paradise of poets and home to Gower Gold ale

Plaid Cymru 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@Plaid_Cymru

6 months

Labour don't care about Wales' culture

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

7 months

I nearly played Arya Stark on game of thrones

ethan !!!

@slimeguyethan

7 months

share a piece of lore about yourself

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@GKC1970 @PoliticsForAlI Four million pounds is a figure being thrown around

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

5 years

@Cruzyfarmer @SkyNews I think camping outside someone’s house with a long lense camera is a bit far though, no?

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

4 years

@cate_pearce @PINsykes Why is it that men are seldom mocked for having a healthy dating life

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

11 months

@ronnasmartin Not to mention there are three other versions of the film starring cis women people can watch if it’s that important to them. Hunter will do a great job

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

7 years

"At this rate neither of you will be getting anything for christmas!" -My mother, to the family cats

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@CBSThisMorning @csandis @CBSMMiller She quite literally died for her right to sing this song. Johann Hari recounts it well!

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

4 years

@charfhenderson Have you heard of something called a depression meal

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

5 months

@VirgilVanProp Those are my empties

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

9 months

Thinking about how I tried to get the host of fat families to support this year’s #babyboybyfield charity and he rejected my cameo request because he wouldn’t say trans rights

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@coopercooperco :(

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

9 years

people will cry over a dog being mistreated but blatantly ignore millions of pigs being slaughtered so they can have bacon

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

6 years

@KayRae14425 @SheRatesDogs Tuesday: 1pm, be a thot

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

1 year

@evemmore Haven’t liked NPH after the Amy Winehouse thing

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

30 days

there’s a difference between being unemployed and being jobless. you can be in full time work and exhibit jobless behaviour i think.

🇵🇪🇳🇬 Isabella Scarlett 🏳️‍⚧️♿️✡️

@IsabellaScar2

1 month

“Get a job” and other unemployment “jokes”/insults are extremely ableist by the way.

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

4 years

@yorkshirefigo This gives me so much secondhand embarrassment on your part

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@ZeroSuitCamus In the original 1978 Halloween Michael Myers is literally neurodivergent and a minor …

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@eggshellfriend I’m gay. Idk why I did this. Thought it would be a funny way to respond (it was). I do love Ken though

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

4 years

@sarahschauer The sole window in my apartment doesn’t open because it’s been inexplicably painted shut. It’s like living in a coffin.

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

4 years

@FreddieAlfonso4 @sarahschauer My landlord who wants to keep my security deposit ghost wrote this

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@katesiuol Please never go to space

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@kattenbarge You have to admire Ethan in being consistent with his principles

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

4 years

@FUCCl

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

4 months

@d3v0t10n__ Always a classic

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

2 years

@holeinearth you mean mother issues

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

2 months

The type of person to send you a card for any and every occasion, including our own break up, because when I came out to him as gay, he stopped being my boyfriend and became my best friend and biggest ally

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

5 years

@millienicol @legaladvice_txt @redditships Look at the time in these screenshots. I’d literally taken those to send to you!!!!

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

11 months

@leathergregory Scratching my head wondering what could be causing these mysterious stomach problems

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

4 years

@sxconner @sarahschauer My actual British accent and my fake British accent are worlds apart but the latter is growing more powerful

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

6 months

Most insane take on the most frivolous discourse

Samplo Corvodina

@TreborRhurbarb

6 months

I always assume people who don't like children in pubs are worried what they might do to the kids when drunk.

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@SparkNotes Same eagle different liver

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@wijodo

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@tonyzaret You sir, have won the Internet

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

2 years

@Chinchillazllla Your tweets have been appearing on my timeline for the past 12 months and I still haven’t worked out what animal rufus is

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

2 months

Thank you for every laugh, every late night phone call, every donation to my favourite charity when I’m having a bad day, thank you for getting me clean, and most of all thank you for unapologetically being yourself!!!! I would feed the ducks with you in every lifetime

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@GabbieHanna This series is starting to give me “welcome to your tape” vibes

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

4 years

@FatandBouji @bethanymota1996 @gwsgab I guess no one really knows what the situation is with her. I see where you’re coming from though. You can’t be married to a racist murderer for 10 years and not have an inkling

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

4 months

@grhamist I carry my gay card everywhere

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

8 years

@matt___nelson I'm just giving up

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

6 months

@belovedlecter Yes

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

5 months

Win, lose or draw. Don’t care. Saw @JoeStephenson96 get stuck in a turnstile so all worth it

James

@jmsb1997

6 months

Win, lose or draw. Don't care. Saw my dad get stuck in a turnstile so all worth it.

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

7 months

The Baby Boy Byfield charity money is being well spent tonight

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

6 months

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@shonfaye I always figured they had just clocked me as queer

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

7 months

@JustBoysLaughin That is NOT emma

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

23 days

@GeebMinister

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@SilvermanJacob He managed to hold onto it for two days total

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@GabbieHanna Do you not realise how demented it is to frame this as a weight loss method

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

5 years

@Cruzyfarmer @SkyNews They’re not saying no pictures. They just don’t want people trying to get photos of them through the windows of their home. They are human beings after all. Are you saying they deserve no privacy whatsoever?

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

7 years

our country's economy is now so bad we had to introduce a railcard for 26-30 year olds. when our MPs were 26 their aspiration was to be able to afford a house, not a train ticket

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

8 years

How can Nigel Farage say "We did it without a single shot being fired" when Jo Cox was literally shot dead in the street

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 months

A @JoeStephenson96 appreciation thread

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@Iconawrites I knew this looked familiar

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

9 years

mate I doubt immigrants are risking their lives crossing oceans to 'steal' your minimum wage job at B&M bargains

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

2 months

When I broke my arm, he even learnt how to plait hair because I could no longer do it myself, and he would have a cracking future as a hair stylist should he ever decide to have a career change

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

2 years

@JoeStephenson96

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@rosielanners There’s a website where you can scroll down the Mariana Trench and read facts at different levels I visit it often

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@wayfinderfenix @sydbricks American Psycho gets the same treatment despite being directed by a woman

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@heereandqueer15 @SparkNotes It’s said like ‘eleventy-first”

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

1 year

@funeralpig This is unemployed erasure

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

8 years

What if u fuck the same guy 15 times lol

Sandro Payme 🇹🇹🇯🇲♿️♿️

@chalicebunnin

8 years

If you fucked over 15 guys there is no way the pussy still has the same elasticity. Lets not make up shit and say its scientifically proven.

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@marksnotnice @TheRunawayDrug The Lobster is fantastic. Colin does tragedy so well

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@glamdemon2004 I saw something that was basically like a man with nail polish on could be pulling you up from a cliff edge and he’d show you his hand first

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

5 months

This is the story of when I got a phone call from an O2 scammer and was so cross that I decided to waste their time back

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

4 years

@RealDashHD @h3h3productions People said similar things about OJ after he killed his wife. What’s your point

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@cacasmiddlename I don’t think her intentions matter at this point - the outcome is still the same

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

4 years

@br1ndl A lot of suicide awareness seems to be focussed on working up the courage to ask for help - no one talks about how soul crushing it is when you finally do and the help you were promised basically doesn’t exist.

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tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

3 years

@luketaylorgo @calebsaysthings Hey girl queen! You look so vagina slay tonight. Pop off pussy hat

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1

24

tess 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

@tessouthwell

18 days

@semtexfarmhand_ isn’t this a Justin McElroy quote

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25