Tanui🌚 @tekashi_tanui1 Twitter profile

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 years

Rich kids at 16 years in an international school 😂🤦‍♂️

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 years

Me at my gf house asking the neighbors kids if there's another 'uncle' who visits when I'm not around 😏

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 years

"Knock knock " "Who's there ?" "Alligator" "Alligator who?" "Urgh this guy thinks I am joking "

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 months

Safaricom texting "your Balance is used up" and you're using WiFi is insane

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 months

We've been suspecting our dad has a second family ,after an investigation we just found out that we're his second family 😭

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

3 months

Ukienda Mahali kuna music na hauoni speakers jua the bills are not so friendly

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

3 months

My bro ameambia my mom ampee pesa yenye angempea ya pads kama angekuwa dem Yooh😭😭

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

4 months

Kairo sai ndyo ana refill chupa ya dasani akuje aperform Tyla challenge

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

1 year

"A thread of tirries to appreciate Tuesday, I'll start" 😂

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

4 months

Slapping your siblings cause they can't understand their homework yet uko na sup na retakes Kwa portal feels illegal but it's not 😂

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

3 months

Kuna Mtu amesema ati waliraid nyumba ya Jimmy wanjigi juu his daughter is more beautiful than Charlene Rutto 😭😭😂

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

4 months

If the police officers are allowed to wear civilians clothes then we should also be allowed their clothes

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

3 months

Going through a broke phase when baddie is starting to show interest is the worst shiit ,like no you can't come over baby there's no food 😭

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

1 year

Your boyfriend receiving insults because of the the things you do in tik tok 😂😂

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 months

Stick to "waah saa utado" everytime someone brings their relationship issues to you

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 years

Kalenjins after speaking English for 30 seconds 😂😂

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 months

Another fine day to tell you lie on that CV they'll offer training on the first week

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

24 days

As a man kuna age ukifika inafaa uanze kujiheshimu,hizi funny funny hairstyles na jeans za maridadi unasare

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

1 month

Mtu sasa anamanage aje kukulana for over hours na hamwagi Mimi ata ukinishika maskio nshamaliza

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

4 months

Huyo jamaa amasave Charlene Rutto kama "zakayo sperm " amenimaliza😂😭

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

3 months

Who's going to tell indomie company that their biggest consumers are not kids but university students and bachelors 😭

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 months

"mtoto umleavyo ndvyo akuavyo" doesn't seems to work on pastor's kids

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

1 year

Girls:I won't allow any boy to touch my boobs this month Breast Cancer:

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

8 months

Kama ukipiga story na mtu huskiangi akitaja wazazi or siblings then don't ask about them

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 months

Nicknaming my dick "neno" coz liwe liwalo neno litasimama>>>

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 months

Unakosana na mtu anakuchuja Netflix first thing,unarudi kuteseka na penis enlargement ads huko Goojara

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

3 months

Msichana akiamua kufanya revenge anafanya adi shetani anasema that's my girl

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

9 months

Me to my dirty utensils "Songeni nichote maji ya kukunywa"

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 months

'Hakuna Mali' is statement I can't comprehend because wdym ?You literally had one job🤦

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

4 months

Kesho tuko ndani kama mkono ya Alicia Kanini

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 months

Having raw rounds,sleeping with each other every night ,going out to eat,doing things together and me saying "I love you" doesn't mean we're in a relationship 😑

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

1 year

Guess who is holding an android phone 🙃

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 years

That moment when she's looking at your meat then you make it jump >>>> Her:Haiyaa fanya tena 😙

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 years

Samson looking at himself in the mirror after sleeping over at Delilah's

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

3 months

My pal alipeleka her gal ku terminate ball which was successful then wakadinyana to celebrate that shit akapata ingine 💀

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

4 months

Osama amepata keki ya uroda akasahau mashida ya wanasagamoyo

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 months

Relatives hupenda kuuliza your whereabouts ndyo wajue penye umefika Kwa kuteseka

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

3 months

All my life Mimi nmekua nkifkria madem wote hunyesha on 28th😭😭

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 months

Students this days kissing when the class is empty . During my time I used to exchange my desk with a good one when no one was in the class 😭

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

9 months

Lakini mnakuwanga aje 😂😭😭

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

3 months

Wdym you're sapiosexual ,sasa ukiona mtu akifanya quadratic equation unambao?

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 years

"Ati unataka kuwa DJ,ndyo utuue sindio" 😂

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

4 months

Tangu Rutto askie shetani ndyo huvaa Kaunda suit akawacha 😂

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 years

Ukiskia budako ameteleza kwa bafu 5 minutes after umetoka kunyonga 💀😂

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 months

Her arch was so bad it got me arching on my bed after she left just to see how hard this shiit could really be 😭😭

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

4 months

Ukiona morio wako akikatia baddie na unajua ako na erectile dysfunction 💀

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

1 year

Dua lipa when Dua kopa walks in

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

8 months

Kanisa zingine hukuwa funny wdym ati as a parish mumeandikiwa quarter mtoe 700k this year na deni ya the last two years haijalipwa.....first of all Nani huyo anatudai Kwanza ??

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 years

When she's going 300 mph on your meat 😭😭😂

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

5 months

Baddie anaingia mat anakaa next to you inabidi umeface dirisha all time ndyo sura yako isimshtue

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

3 months

Ile udaku wanaume hupiga in the name of catching up inashinda ata ya wamama Kwa ploti

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 months

Tumeenda kuoga pamoja akaingia amevaa hizo gloves tuwili nkamuuliza rada ramsdale sai najiosha 😭😭

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 months

That desperate moment when you think every notification is from mpesa<<<

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

3 months

Hiyo ugonjwa imeshika uso ya vybz kartel haiwezi shika matako ya dem wakikuyu?

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

5 months

Abussive nigga aki apologize ukatae apology unatandikwa tena

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

3 months

By the time anaamua kukuonyesha mapenzi unakuanga umeboeka ajab

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

1 year

"Uncle leo hujatoa maziwa mingi"

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 years

I asked her "how many niggas am I competing with " she said none coz I'm disqualified 💀😭😭

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 months

Clubbing has to be the most overrated adulthood activity ever,you're just wasting money on alcohol and unnecessary noise while pretending to have fun

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

4 months

Nmekutana na mtu anaita twitter spaces "mkutano za twitter" sijaheal 😭

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 years

Nini wewe ? Unanilenga na tunafanana uso 😒😂💀

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

5 months

Unadhani mtu anakupenda kumbe amepewa dare ya kukaa na wewe for one year

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

1 year

Hiyo choo umenyongea iko na CCTV 😂😂💀

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 months

Writing boys unaweza ishi na wao wanakununulia pombe na nyama daily lakini kazi hawawezi kuonyesha,unapata jamaa anajifungia kejani akipiga kazi alafu akimaliza anakuitia jaba ndyo zishike ndyo umpigie hekaya za abunwasi acheke

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

8 months

Nini huwasumbua💀😭😂😂

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

1 month

Unaambia mtu "unajua nacheka juu ya nini" alafu bado anakuuliza Kwa nini

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 months

Seeing your parent at her lowest and you can't help is the worst shiit ever sumn can go through 😭😭

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

1 year

Bitches will play hard to get just to be like this in bed😒

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 months

Shooting shots nowadays n ngumu I'll just think about you adi unipende 🥲

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

3 months

"Nmekuachia mungu" used to be scary asf back in the days

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

5 months

Ukijua uko na fake shoes unamaintain eye contact na mtu ndyo asiangalie kiatu

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

4 months

I'm sure Rutto sending police officers to githurai was to kill people from Mt Kenya ,why didn't he send them to Eldoret???

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

3 months

Mambo ya "A guy who likes you will provide for you without asking "Wacha ata mungu lazima aombwe

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 months

Sai pale highschool ningekuwa nimerushiwa marker pen juu ya Kulala

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 years

"Gents I'm no longer a virgin " "What ?sit down we gotta celebrate this " "I can't sit down "😭 The gents:

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

22 days

Sisi slim niggas dem akilalia Kwa kifua anaamka na logo ya Adidas kwa uso

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

1 year

Me after cummin in less than 2 minutes..Satisfied and unashamed because my happiness matters more than anyone 😌😌

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

3 months

Rutto akiulizwa "we found bodies at quarry " atajibu they were swimming right

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

1 year

Huyu ameambiwa na coolkid Fulani "no capping" akatoa kofia kumamaye 😭😭

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

4 months

Unadance Tu vizuri Kwa club alafu unakumbuka vile mamako anateseka na watoto wako ushango unaamua Tu kukaa chini

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 months

Being kissed while you're sleeping has to be purest form of love ...unless you're in prison

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

1 year

I knew she was cheating on me when her kiss tasted like my homies D**k 😪

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

1 year

Me in heaven,trying to explain to Jesus the difference between Keg and Alcohol 😌😂

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

3 months

Najua pia nyinyi deep down mnajua omena is not a meal for humans

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

1 year

When a kalenjin girl is married by another tribe ,all Kalenjin men feel they have failed as a community ,Kwanza mjaka😭😭😂

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 months

Kujiongelesha alafu ushikwe then you turn into musician >>

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

8 months

Lakini nini huwasumbua 😂😭

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

8 months

Lakini mnakuwanga aje 😂😂

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 years

Siku hizi morio wako anakuomba keja alafu mnapitana na yeye kwa gate akiingia na mwanaume Namna gani jameni 😭😂😂

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

4 months

I'm not against lesbians but imagine not sleeping at home because of a finger 💀😂😂

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

4 months

Maandamano imetukeep busy adi tukasahau hii mwezi n men mental health

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

3 months

Kuna Mahali nmetuma view once ikakuwa blueticked Wacha niheshimu sehemu zangu za siri

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

3 months

Dem anafanyanga investigation yake Safi alafu anakuja kukuliza waiting for you to deny ndyo akutoleee receipts

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

1 year

She prepares a table before me in the presence of my enemies 😊😊

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 months

Huku ushago Kaa huskii Jay melody na huna nduthi huwezi wakunywa

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Tanui🌚

@tekashi_tanui1

2 years

Her :Babe nipee pesa ninunue bra Him: Ya nini na huna matiti Her : si pia wee unavaanga boxer 💀

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