Chook @spissy_c Twitter profile

Pinned Tweet

Chook

@spissy_c

5 years

Espresso Martini’s are the cocktail equivalent of ‘The Horses’ by Daryl Braithwaite.

6

73

Last Seen Profiles

@Enzobuonalana

@AdrienCorbeel

@G_winnAepy04

@asd

@EFEMERIDESMX

@_luizconde

@uwiccano

@Hiilaali15

@SioSorry

@CthulhuTheGuru

@kappa_nyc

@TheExMoCringe

@RSM_GPSection

@himukai_kogane_

@MAOUware

@asdjgahtttt3

@bytetysoncoins

@number1pinkcub

@siyaumayy

@ky_pcs

@kaynaknese

@Castbox_fm

@CherilynI1380

@JasonHamptonJr

@JackH_Music

@klmarkland

@BinorRaja

@bleuducat

@NeazulYuuji

@NoticiasUgc

@roosevelt_86782

@toshi630222

@Sanjay_k89

@BinorRaja

@crazytomshow

@servelunablack

Chook

@spissy_c

3 years

CFMEU announce they are unable to protest today due to light rain.

40

99

2K

Chook

@spissy_c

2 years

Essendon will sack literally anyone except dodoro.

17

26

723

Chook

@spissy_c

2 years

Congrats on the new gig.

49

24

693

Chook

@spissy_c

7 months

Maynard gets a premiership medal and Brayshaw gets to move into assisted living at age 40. Thug.

150

18

619

Chook

@spissy_c

3 years

Carlton and Richmond opening the season is the worst ‘tradition’ in world sports. Makes 0 sense.

40

19

538

Chook

@spissy_c

2 years

Stand by Bevo

43

42

543

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

I cannot think of a single person involved at a division 3 football club I would trust with the key to the magic whistle.

Mark Stevens

@StevoMedia

1 year

Brent Harvey says the “green whistle” should be available for use at all games … he was desperately looking for one, but says only medicos or ambos can use. “Surely it can be locked away in a cupboard somewhere.” @RSNBreakfast

26

1

93

11

507

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

Rohan showing about as much regard for his teammates head as he did for the mother of his children.

33

21

480

Chook

@spissy_c

9 days

Big appeal from Christ here… and he’s given him. England fall to six for sixty six.

Not Elon Musk

@iamnot_elon

10 days

IMPORTANT X POLL Should I allow ALL Brazilian citizens to access X from their cell phones via Starlink for free?

30K

21K

232K

4

19

473

Chook

@spissy_c

3 years

What impact will Nadia Bartel’s cocaine party (soon to be framed as mental health issues) have on Geelong’s premiership chances?

32

6

386

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

So many dog shots.

132

28

367

Chook

@spissy_c

10 months

Clarko just really wanted to know if his girlfriend was pregnant.

11

12

361

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

Hard to believe Patrick Cripps will be 32 next year. That club had wasted his career.

42

1

331

Chook

@spissy_c

2 years

Mason Cox eternal goat for stopping the 4peat. Nothing left to prove.

5

13

309

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

Alcott hit on my wife so she escaped by waking up a nearby stairwell.

Joey

@gothamhiphop

1 year

What’s your favorite interaction you’ve had with a celebrity?

5K

959

22K

19

5

308

Chook

@spissy_c

4 years

Reminder that Chris Scott has forgone his entire wage this year. 🐐

13

9

301

Chook

@spissy_c

3 years

De Goey failed to understand the Dusty/Swanny approach of spending the off season overseas so he can be on the gear the whole time with some form of anonymity only works if you don’t end up groping and bashing people.

6

2

291

Chook

@spissy_c

3 years

Tom Hawkins in the last 5 years: 289 Goals (2nd in AFL) 183 Goal Assists (2nd in AFL) 879 Score Involvements (3rd in AFL) 393 Marks in F50 (1st in AFL) 257 Groundball gets (2nd in AFL) Fucking outrageous.

21

14

276

Chook

@spissy_c

4 years

Who’s the best Ablett? Finally we have a clear answer @luke_ablett

7

13

278

Chook

@spissy_c

10 months

Paid employees turning up to work ✅

Carlton News & Stats

@UptheBaggers

10 months

Michael Voss emphasised the strong turnout to the return of preseason training was player led, labelling the playing group hungry & energised, with strong leadership. [Chloe Williams]

2

75

5

1

268

Chook

@spissy_c

2 years

Still all time.

5

16

258

Chook

@spissy_c

4 months

Didn’t have Bartel & Tom Morris as the self appointed faces for respecting women on my bingo card this week.

Footy on Nine

@FootyonNine

4 months

"At some stage there's got to be a fork in the road." Jimmy Bartel says he is 'incredibly uncomfortable' with the prospect of Tarryn Thomas re-entering the comp next year, as clubs plan to take a stand against domestic violence this weekend. #9FootyClassified | Live on 9Now 🖥️

128

92

1K

51

3

254

Chook

@spissy_c

2 years

How can you win a flag, have your second final in Melbourne in 3 years and get 60k there. Send them to tassie.

5

6

253

Chook

@spissy_c

5 years

Spare a thought for St Kilda. People actually want to go to the club for the first time and they have no idea how to trade for players.

11

249

Chook

@spissy_c

2 months

Sir, Darcy Moore’s knee has hit a second spleen.

4

13

255

Chook

@spissy_c

6 months

@Damian_fasciani Imagine playing an extra game more than half the league.

3

1

249

Chook

@spissy_c

5 years

Goodbye to Tim Kelly. Double parked Home House royalty.

14

13

238

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

Pies going for their second flag, Brisbane their 4th. Exciting.

13

5

241

Chook

@spissy_c

3 years

There is actually no player in the AFL more likeable than Ben Cunnington. Hates easy possessions, doesn’t speak, physically dominates all opponents. Perfect athlete.

13

8

242

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

Staggering that Pickett is free to play after stealing half a million dollars but Butler is missing this week because of a perfect tackle.

14

3

239

Chook

@spissy_c

11 months

My list of AFL media types that would most easily be defeated by a mid sized wild animal: 1. Max Laughton 2. Sam McLure 3. Gerard Whatley

24

10

240

Chook

@spissy_c

2 years

Horrible news for Zac Williams. Also Tough for a club to lose 8% of their cap space on a player for the season. Thankfully Carlton still appear to have 130% if the total salary cap still playing.

10

4

235

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

185kg inside mid seems good, bit on the short side.

16

10

229

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

Harry McKay will be 30 next year, 6 years left on his deal. Should Carlton be worried?

40

1

223

Chook

@spissy_c

3 years

Nathan Wilson is by far the methiest looking AFL player not named Matt Parker.

8

3

226

Chook

@spissy_c

3 years

Funny how protests are always on weekends. No one wants to use their annual leave to fight for freedom?

8

6

223

Chook

@spissy_c

4 years

For you @SgtButane

13

12

218

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

Waiting for the perfect opportunity to release my Tom Morris in blackface photos. Feeling like it’s close.

20

4

210

Chook

@spissy_c

3 years

TIL: Dylan fucking Alcott catcalled my wife outside the jam factory in Hobart. She didn’t tell me at the time because she knew I would have immediately tried to roll him into the harbour. Nemesis origin story kicked up to 11.

11

3

198

Chook

@spissy_c

4 years

When scrolling past I initially thought it was a KFC zinger box

4

2

191

Chook

@spissy_c

4 years

Few things in life are more pronounced than Bec Judds preferred coke nostril.

10

15

187

Chook

@spissy_c

5 years

At what stage will @sirswampthing finally crack and just tell people to fucking google it?

2

10

189

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

Daicos becoming coward Selwood is amazing.

20

0

183

Chook

@spissy_c

3 years

Carlton booing a player they basically asked to leave for picks to help their 20 year rebuild on his 200th. Never change cursed club.

6

5

182

Chook

@spissy_c

3 years

I’m down $489,525 but have finally won my Kolodjashnij first goal ticket.

4

180

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

Absolutely staggering that Geelong are a game off top spot with half their remaining games fixtured at their boutique venue. Easiest draw, every single year.

24

5

179

Chook

@spissy_c

4 years

Don’t understand why Collingwood won’t let Port Adelaide wear prison bars when 4 of their players tonight are in fluro? #AFLCatsPies

7

4

176

Chook

@spissy_c

5 months

There are no bad flag sides, but 2023 pies gotta end up being the stinkies in recent memory. 2016 dogs levels.

51

3

175

Chook

@spissy_c

4 years

Not having to hear Brian Taylor this week has been incredible

9

5

170

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

Collingwood winning a flag and new No1 ranking as weakest premiership side in AFL era a good double today. Vale 2016 dogs and 1993 bombers.

90

3

166

Chook

@spissy_c

2 years

You will never, ever see a player like this again. The greatest ever captain, the greatest ever cat. Been a golden few years for the Geelong football club, and on reflection that era is solely aligned with Joel’s career. Deserving of the fairytale finish.

4

8

165

Chook

@spissy_c

12 days

6 days younger than Nick Daicos.

AFL

@AFL

12 days

What a brilliant season for this young Cat! Ollie Dempsey is your 2024 @Telstra Rising Star. #AFLAwards

63

26

383

25

2

166

Chook

@spissy_c

3 years

2

5

156

Chook

@spissy_c

2 years

Hahaha jfc. Tom’s group chats have more leaks than the dogs.

Guy

@SupercoachJohn

2 years

@BuzzBoiz @footytim

92

45

287

18

8

156

Chook

@spissy_c

2 years

Ash Barty retired after losing faith in the integrity of the sport after finding out the truth about Alcott. #cheatinaseat

6

10

155

Chook

@spissy_c

4 months

Really hope the league doesn’t ever use that footage of Hird or Hawkins hugging spectators in a highlight package ever again.

Tom Morris

@tommorris32

4 months

The fan who made contact with Harvey Johnston has received a 12-month ban from the AFL. Six of those months suspended. So he won’t attend another game this men’s season. Hear from him tonight at 6pm. @FootyonNine @9NewsMelb

201

12

189

24

3

153

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

Oliver secret drugs ban keeping Geelong’s season alive.

12

0

153

Chook

@spissy_c

4 months

BT just knows calling him the Horny one would have killed during the peak cocaine addled triple M commentary box with Lyon and Brayshaw.

8

1

153

Chook

@spissy_c

2 months

Men of a certain age swear she was a babe. She looks like a Hawthorn fwd pocket.

Bastien Fachan

@BastienFachan

2 months

15 iconic tennis moments at the Olympics 🥇🎾 Seoul 1988 - Steffi Graf completes Calendar Golden Slam to cap off the greatest season ever

37

438

8K

6

3

152

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

Cats sneaking into 4th and rolling Collingwood first final would be a teriffic day on here.

20

2

149

Chook

@spissy_c

5 years

Silver lining of a Richmond Premiership. People will be forced to admid that Rance is overhyped. He’s an excellent system player, but Grimes has been able to do everything he does playing the same role. Neither anywhere near Scarlett or Silvagni. #afl #aflcatstigers #finals

14

5

135

Chook

@spissy_c

3 years

West Coast’s rebuild with no picks and no cap space should be good.

10

2

145

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

Incredible parallels between Carlton and their number one ticket holder Alcott. Only seem to win anything when they are cheating.

17

5

141

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

Sarah Bellum

@tamsully12

1 year

WITHOUT GOOGLING Name a famous historic battle.

25K

3K

25K

5

11

144

Chook

@spissy_c

2 years

@KendrickPerkins What is exactly American about Emiid and Giannis?

2

0

136

Chook

@spissy_c

2 years

I don’t understand why people don’t like Ginnivan? Genuinely, do people just instinctively find ways to hate kids who have fun?

24

2

134

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

Not Lachie Neale going to ground again! Rubbed out two blokes this year.

AFL

@AFL

1 year

Rory Laird has been handed a one-match suspension for this tackle on Lachie Neale. More MRO findings:

250

8

179

30

1

136

Chook

@spissy_c

4 years

True Detective S1 still may be the best season of Television of all time. Happy to hear other suggestions. One season alone.

52

3

133

Chook

@spissy_c

3 years

Fair 5 years, Tom.

8

10

134

Chook

@spissy_c

4 years

I always knew Tim Kelly was the one holding Geelong back.

5

6

129

Chook

@spissy_c

2 years

Rhianna, or the 13CABS Grand Final Sprint?

4

7

129

Chook

@spissy_c

5 months

Please let Tom Morris be in the press conference asking about Caleb.

3

2

132

Chook

@spissy_c

3 years

3

6

122

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

Raising awareness for the bender pay gap. When your wife is hungover, you bring water, Panadol and food to her while she spends the whole day in bed and recovers. When you have a hangover you are woken up at 6.30 for a coffee walk, then brunch, and abused if you sit down.

2

1

126

Chook

@spissy_c

2 years

In case you had forgotten, each year Jake Stringer completes pre season.

7NEWS Melbourne

@7NewsMelbourne

2 years

. @essendonfc star Jake Stringer will return to full training next week. The 28-year-old has been on a modified program since the end of last season because of a groin injury. But he's now ready to scale up his workload. #7AFL #7NEWS

24

5

97

9

2

123

Chook

@spissy_c

3 years

Andrew Bogut is one of the most gutless people on Twitter. Genuine snowflake.

14

0

120

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

Someone has been sacked for this one

4

0

125

Chook

@spissy_c

3 years

Carlton fans, was it worth buying the 1995 grand final for your club to be cursed forever more?

4

7

120

Chook

@spissy_c

2 years

Toby Greene is an excellent footballer, and way less of a crim than half the blokes people slobber over. Hope he goes well.

10

5

118

Chook

@spissy_c

2 years

While we are at it. The grand final public holiday needs to be on the Monday, not the Friday. This will ensure all those who observe get to have a proper bender if their team wins.

7

0

120

Chook

@spissy_c

3 years

Selwood being allowed to play as a pure inside mid again is the reason he’s having the season he is. Remember when Boak looked cooked 3 years ago when moved to a flank? Some guys are just pure mids.

8

0

115

Chook

@spissy_c

2 months

@RalphyHeraldSun Where was this energy when this happened to Daicos costing Norf da game Jon?

4

0

118

Chook

@spissy_c

8 months

When you are so carried by umpires it transfers into other sports.

Matt Forrest

@mattforrest29

8 months

Wild ride for Carlton star Charlie Curnow after getting skittled for a golden duck in a charity cricket game in Torquay, but was called back due to a no ball #AFL

6

1

25

5

2

117

Chook

@spissy_c

5 years

I get married tomorrow. Please like and retweet. Liking and retweeting also confirms Matt Scarlett is twice the player Alex Rance is.

3

13

109

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

Only Dangerfield could be abused for playing with a broken rib and collapsed lung.

2

5

113

Chook

@spissy_c

4 years

Never forget thay Geelong turned the Motlop compo pick into Ablett and Tim Kelly. #AFLCatsPower

7

2

109

Chook

@spissy_c

1 month

Pretty incredible to think this was an example of what the greatest athletes in the world looked like when Essendon, Carlton and Collingwood won 90% of their ‘premierships’.

4

0

110

Chook

@spissy_c

3 years

Bruce is that fucking good at this, isn’t he?

6

1

109

Chook

@spissy_c

5 years

If Hawkins doesn't get a week, it still won't be more corrupt than Cochin not getting suspended for knocking out Shiel. #afl #AFLFinals #AFLCatsEagles

3

6

104

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

Just incredible. The false victimhood these supporters find a way to apply to their players this year is as good as I have ever seen.

Matt

@Mattys123

1 year

Taylor Adams 200th game this week. A hugely under rated player in a period where Collingwood has been consistently in the top 8. Maligned by even our own fans. But one of the more reliable and toughest players we've had #gopies

14

1

140

16

1

109

Chook

@spissy_c

5 years

Unsure why Geelong are chasing Brad Hill when they already have Blicavs as an elite wingman.

8

6

104

Chook

@spissy_c

4 years

If you understand how historically bad the Cat’s are after a bye, their dominance after 4 day breaks makes perfect sense. #aflcatsport

3

2

103

Chook

@spissy_c

3 months

Sydney’s top and flying high The whole leagues on their knees But I wonder how they’d really fare With our their academies.

Geelong Cats

@GeelongCats

3 months

The @maccas fan banner is back! ✍️ Got a cracking banner message for our clash with the Swans? Submit your message for the chance to see it on our match day banner, plus a $20 Macca's® voucher.

16

0

16

21

0

104

Chook

@spissy_c

3 years

This is not how I wanted to find out my wife runs the Essendon finals page.

churchy lè femme

@lilzzzzza

3 years

I go to sleep happy knowing it’s also more than 6,000 days since the admin of the Essendon finals has achieved sexual climax

14

3

128

2

0

100

Chook

@spissy_c

2 months

I’ll bite. Who is Jordan Boyd?

David Zita

@DavidZita1

2 months

@FOXFOOTY Jordan Boyd’s suspension has been downgraded to a fine (medium impact to low). He is free to play this week.

64

26

387

3

0

101

Chook

@spissy_c

3 years

Years of ketamine abuse really starting to take its toll on Liz Cambage

3

2

94

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

Congrats to @SwoopLuke and all the flagpies fans for finally winning their grand final.

17

1

98

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

@CarltonFC The loser energy of your club permeates everything you do. Somehow failing on a post with meme gold as ammo.

4

6

96

Chook

@spissy_c

1 year

Four Corners

@4corners

1 year

Paralympians and officials are calling for urgent action to combat what they say is a widespread and growing cheating problem. #4Corners

0

8

14

4

2

98

Chook

@spissy_c

5 years

If anything, the AFL media should be doing more to provide updates on Alex Rance. Anything to fill the crushing void in my life now that no one is writing about Nadia Bartel anymore.

4

1

97